How Old Is Too Old - Greeley,CO

About 7 yrs old is what is common around here.
Don't worry about peoples 'looks'.
Look for places with family rest rooms.
Evan Target has them now.

100% depends on the location. Sometimes I take my 7 nd 9 year old boys in with me still...and really too bad for whoever doesn't like it. They aren't there to look, they are there to be safe and use the restroom. My kids are big for their ages and look older, but no one has ever given me a hard time or a look.

If it's a place where we are comfortable, then I let them go alone.

Somewhere in that 6-7 range is when I start letting them go in by themselves. Now there are still places that I won't let my 9 year old go into the men's room by himself (like highway rest stops).

Who cares what others think!
I've been to places that still creep me out enough that my 13 year old has come in with me. Most of the time I will send my 13 and 10 year old boys in together if I feel it's OK but not enough to let one go in by themselves and I stand in the doorway.
If your little one still needs help than of course he comes in with you! Again...who cares what others think?
A woman's restroom has individual stalls, it's not like he's going to be seeing anything. Of course work on the whole peeking under stalls and always try to pick a stall that is against a wall and away from other women whenever possible to minimize it. The handicap stall is perfectly acceptable to use and it typically set at the end.
Not everywhere has family/unisex bathrooms or they are occupied and you can't wait for those in there to finish. Obviously that is your best choice when it is available. If not, take your child in with you until whatever age you feel needs to happen and don't let the other women's nosiness bother you.

Until you are comfortable with him going alone. Who cares what anyone else thinks.

I honestly don't understand why people have such an issue with bringing boys into a ladies restroom. We are all behind a stall! What could he possibly see or why would it bother anyone? (have to say, if it was the other way around, I can see why, with urinals, that girls may not be OK in the boys mens room).

Don't worry about what anyone else thinks about this issue...do what you need to do as a mom.

5 is not too old, and if he'd delayed, then you bring him in as long as needed. Many places have family restrooms now, which is great. But honestly, if I saw a parent with an older child in a restroom, I would assume that the child was there because they need help. Why else would an older child be in the bathroom with a parent, since older kids are typically demanding independence about this kind of thing.

You do what you need to do to take care of your boy, and anybody who is giving you looks can kiss off.

Take him. I've got an almost 8 year old son whom is autistic(not potty trained yet either)and so yes of course he goes into the ladies room with me. He does not play under the stalls or do anything that would be considered inappropriate.

Ignore the looks, and if anyone ever comments let them know you're doing what is safest for your child but at the same time don't feel the need substantiate what you're doing.

I don't look twice at older boys being in women's restrooms because as many have stated we are behind closed doors - and provided they aren't doing anything what's the big deal?

5 is not too old. And you know your son better than anyone else, you'll know when he's ready. Until then, ignore the looks.

I've worked at two medical facilities with a Unasex. He goes with you until he says I can go in alone. No big deal. We're all in a stall unless its men's room anyway.

That's their problem--not yours! I have 3 boys (9, 6, 4) and they go into the bathroom with me (unless dad is around). My 9 year old could easily pass for 7 or 8 and we've never gotten looks.

Its all up to you really. To each their own is my opinion. I still take my nine year old with me into the womens restroom and he looks like he's twelve. When I have to go to the restroom I have to go. Would it be worth it to have him wait for me outside and get distracted and walk away? Or god forbid someone took him. I would never forgive myself. He is able to go into the mens restroom by himself when I don't have to go. My son was delayed at four too and I wouldn't even think about doing it then. Ignore the looks mama and go with your gut. You do what you have to do, and what makes you feel comfortable.

He's in the stall with you. He can't see anyone else's naughty bits. People can get a grip or get over it.

Many places these days have a 'family' bathroom. I would seek those out when possible.

Other than that, I am not sure what to suggest. If it is any consolation, my 4 year old boys went in with me if there was no family/single bathroom option.

Sometimes ya gotta do what ya gotta do!

Keep taking him with you. He's still young, regardless of his developmental issues. I never let my 4 year old off on his own either.

Don't worry about the looks. There's really nothing that a child can see in a ladies room anyway! Good heavens! People are ridiculous sometimes. Ignore them.

If it helps you, I think it's okay to say audibly some cues though to calm down the staring crowd - something like, "When you are 5 you will go to kindergarten" or "when you are older you can use the mens' room but since you are only 4 you need to stay with me" or "you are 4 now so you know how to wash your hands - show me how you do it." Don't make it too weird for your son, but it's okay if it seems natural and in context.

Also, you might want to take him into some men's rooms in places like restaurants where there is just a single stall and a main door you can lock. There won't be other men in there and there is usually a urinal as well as a regular toilet/stall. He might as well get a look at it. If you have trusted friends with a dad in the picture, it's okay to see if your son wants to start going to the men's room with him. Be sure that the man is going to use the same hygiene routine that you do, not just to be thorough but to reinforce for a developmentally challenged child. Also, the layout/architecture of a men's room can throw off a kid who's so used to the ladies' room so it's good to have a man talk him through it.

That's not too old to take him to the ladies room. He's not even 5 and he has no father to help him in the men's room. I would suggest when he does get a little older have a man like his grandfather nor uncle nor someone to take him into e men's room the first time

Definitely not too old yet and I really think a boy going in a women's room is different bc of stalls. I think it's a tougher call when girls should stop going with their dads given urinals... You are totally fine for quite a while so don't even worry about it. I can't believe people give you looks. Just look right back. I don't think any mother would look oddly. We understand.

*ETA: I missed the "delayed" part of your post, so do whatever you feel he is capable of.*
As others have said, ignore the looks, if your son needs help then take him with you.
On the other hand, I was always one to encourage independence in my kids. I think my son started going into men's rooms around four or so. If it was a single toilet room (no stalls) I would stick my head in the door first to make sure it was empty and wait outside the door until he was done. Multiple stalls I would also wait outside the door and was not shy about cracking the door open and saying "you all right in there Luke?" if I felt he was taking too long.
It's easy enough to explain to him what a urinal is (he will probably love that lol!) Also, even if he doesn't have a dad, doesn't he have other men in his life, uncle, grandpa, cousins, family friends (?) that could take him into a men's room sometime, to give him the lay of the land, so to speak?
What about preschool? At that age most kids are toileting on their own in separate boys/girls rooms (though the teachers still help if needed.)

I think you're fine for now, but do work on his ability to handle going to the men's bathroom with you right outside the door. Here's why: At least where we live, starting at age six, kids have to use their own gender's dressing rooms (which include the bathrooms) at all recreation centers -- boys six and up can't go into the women's dressing area at the rec center pools. That's why there are family changing rooms where it's fine to have a mom with a son or dad with a daughter etc. -- BUT those rooms are few and often there's a line for them. Should the rule be the way it is? I don't know, but I do know that eventually your son is going to be with you someplace where either he can't go in the ladies' room or, for instance, he's desperate to go but the ladies' is fully occupied with a line of women waiting for it too.

Right now, take him as you need to, especially with his developmental issues. If he were alone in either a men's or ladies' room it sounds as if he'd need an adult there with him at this point. Just shoot to have him ready to do this on his own (with you close by) by the time he starts school. Once he is around other boys at school, you may find that he, not you, is the one to say he should go by himself to the men's room.

I don't remember how old my son was when I had to send him into a men's restroom alone. I remember it was stressful, I also remember having to ask a gentleman coming out could you please go in and tell him he needs to stop washing his hands. Not sure why he loved making bubbles in the sink, grrrrrrr

I always just apologized to anyone around and kept him right by me. I think he was about five but don't quote me on that.

I stopped bringing my boys into the ladies when they were 5. That is the rule for change rooms at the pools here, and seemed reasonable for the washrooms as well. They had started kindergarten at 5 and had to be independent in the washroom at school, so I knew they could be independent elsewhere.

ETA: My boys would have waited outside the ladies room by the time they were three if they didn't have to go, but I could trust them to not wander off.

My son is 7 and, depending on where we are, I still bring him in the ladies room with me sometimes. He's allowed alone in the men's room in uncrowded places with only one door (like a restaurant). But, if we're somewhere like a baseball game or theme park, he can't go in alone. don't send him in the men's room alone until you're comfortable. When you're ready, have a friend take him in and teach him about urinals, though when he's young and alone, he may be better off going into a stall anyway.

A.,

Where is YOUR dad in this? Can he help out?

Why not use family restrooms?

My boys were in Kindergarten/First Grade when they used the bathrooms by themselves. I always stood outside the door while they were there if their dad wasn't with them.

I tell him to shut his eyes and if I see them open he'll be in trouble. Then he goes in the stall with me and stands by the wall so he can't see through the cracks or anything. When we're both done we go wash our hands and I hold him higher so he can wash his hands.

I would take him in at that age. My DH still takes our DD who is 6 with him into the men's room (to a stall) if he's solo and can't find a family restroom. I would ignore the looks and if anyone asks, just say, "He's 4." You probably will never see those busybody women again anyway. It's only been the last year (since she started K) that she's gone into the restroom stall solo. Sometimes at the pool she will go by herself, but that is a very very small community pool where we know everyone.

We started letting SD go solo into a restroom while we waited around 7 and would let her walk across the food court to the restroom by herself around 8 yrs old. But when you have a not as typical child, nevermind what other people with other children do. When he is older, if he still needs your help, scope out places with one unisex bathroom or family bathrooms.

As far as urinals, I would think about who I knew (your father, your brother, a good friend?) who could take him to a men's room so that the first time he encountered a urinal wasn't the first time he soloed in a men's room.

Don't care what anyone thinks - just do what is right for you and your son.

If it means taking him in until he's 10, so be it. Be strong!

Take him with you unless you feel comfortable other wise.

I'm lucky I have a 16 year old boy that is 6 feet tall so when we are out and about I always send him with his younger brother who is 12 just because. I know that no one is going to mess with my young one when there is a "man" with him.

I'd like for you to think about ways to bring men into your sons' life. Do you go to church? When he's a little older he could belong to groups that have fathers that are volunteers and would be great roll models. When your son is old enough I highly encourage you to involve him in Cub Scouts and Boy Scouts. It is very difficult as a woman to teach a young man to be a man. How could we know how, we aren't men.

Best of Luck

At the gym we go to, 6yos need to use the gender-appropriate locker room. But, that's a locker room where women and other girls are actively dressing/undressing. In a bathroom with individual stalls, the age could be higher.