How Can I Get Him to Poop in the Potty?

My son use to go hid and poop and he would only use the potty to go pee pee. I made him sit on the potty until he went potty I would use this time to talk with him and tell him he was a big boy I would also tell him that I loved him and that big boys used the potty to go to the bathroom.

I had a friend whose son refused to poop in the potty and it caused major issues inside. Another friend's son would ask you to put a diaper on him to go poo....and he did...and a few months later, he just gave up the diaper and went in the potty and now doesn't even wear pull ups at night and he's barely 3!! I'm so jealous... :-)

I had this problem with my daughter and the fissure thing was an issue from one bout of constipation. I had noticed that she was having very big stools when making a BM - adult size or larger. She happened to have the flu one day and while her pediatrician was checking her stomach, he rushed her immediately to the hospital next door - it ended up being an impaction (she was adopted from a third world country where they fed them flour and water, so it probably was from that. We were very lucky that she didn't get infection or worse and that they were able to fix the problem with enemas, etc instead of surgery. She was in the hospital for a week. I found out it is a very common thing and that if it is not found by a certain age or time, the intestin/bowel forgets how to operate and will not ever remember again. So children, even teenagers have to check into the hospital for a week or more stay every few months to get it under control - it's a way of life for them. She has been on Miralax for almost 3 years. She will eventually get off of it, but for now they're suggesting we play it safe. She only takes it if she hasn't had a BM that day. Somoe days we skip it, but we never let her go longer than 2 days -- the 3rd day we'll use 3 tsp. and she goes. It's not a laxative, but works great.
If not a medical issue, another thing we used, sounds corny, but we'd have a "BM race." I'd say I had to go and go to another bathroom or my husband would and we'd see who finished first. Another thing that is natural that people don't realize is that having the legs (feet) raised a little helps it to come out so easy, especially because it makes one lean back. So make sure there is a stepstool to rest feet on and encourage leaning back. Imagine trying to go to the bathroom with your legs dangling on a toilet too high for you.I have even seen devices (for adults)that fit around the bottom of the toilet so that ones feet are slightly raised and the body is positioned properly -- I know people who swear by it. It really is harder to go when leaning forward.

I had the same problem with my daughter. I spoke to the pediatrician about it and she said that it is a vicious cylce. They have a poop that hurts their bottom/tummy and then they don't want it to hurt again so they hold it in. By holding it in, they become constipated and it hurts.

Here's what she recommended and it fixed the problem. I give my daughter a half a capful of Miralax every day to soften her stools so her tummy doesn't hurt. It is odorless and tastless and dissolves easily. I mix it in her juice or applesauce. She has no idea. If you do this, you must do it daily or else it will start the cycle again. You can purchase it over the counter. Whatever you decide, I hope it works for you and your son.

Wait 6 months and try again. All of my boys were well past three before they were truly ready....one was 3 1/2.... You will save yourself so much trouble.

maybe he is constipated and his belly and butt hurt..
i would checkout with a doctor to see what you could give him
to loosen up his stools. we all know how painful and hard it is to have a bowel movement when constipated!!

As a mom, you want to see your child progress. I have a 3 1/2 year old boy doing the exact same thing as yours right now. None of the older kids did this, and hopefully, the baby won't do it when it's his turn. But there is something I learned. You can't force your child to do two things. One is eating. The second is their bowels. You set the environment that makes it easy to do it. You make it convenient. You teach him and show him videos and read books. But you can't make him go. That's what he is in control of. It's frustrating, but one day, he'll get to the point where he's ready to let go.
You may get some advice to just let him sit there until he does go. That doesn't work. And it only makes both of you more frustrated in the end. Wait it out. Be encouraging. And make a big deal when he does do it.

We had same problem and I figured out about the same time each day we read a special book, on the toilet. Ours was a very quiet cricket, by Eric Carle. He loved hearing the end sometimes we read that book 2-3 times in a row, but it worked. Do not allow it to be seen or read anywhere but potty, that makes it special time with mom, they relax and go potty...

Good Luck!

B.,
Is he using a potty chair or the toilet? Which ever one ,try the opposite and play it up big time , "you are a "big boy" . Sometimes children who are trained on a toilet have accidently fell in or had the feeling they were going to fall in and it makes it a little scarry for them, you can get the potty "seat" ,which fits right on the regular toilet seat to prevent them from falling in. Have you trained him to pee on the potty seat or stand up at the toilet? Sometimes that can be confusing for them too. Have you checked his BM'S too see if they were especially hard, could be it hurts when he poops ,no matter where he maybe trying to go and he just wants to avoid the pain of going. Make sure he gets plenty of fluids and fruits and veggies, it makes it a whole lot easier to go. Reward him if he does go by offering new character underwear he likes, (you might even let him pick them out) and remind him that they are big boy undies and he doesn't want to "mess them up" , so he can wear them again. With one of my children I had a similar problem and made a game of it, there's the cookie monster and then there is the "Poop Monster" who gobbles up thier poop when the toilet flushes, (sounds silly I know , but, it worked, sometimes you have to be a little creative :) ) I don't know if any of this may help , but, it's worth a try ! Best of luck to both of you, C. S.

My oldest had a problem going poop as well. She would go pee every time in the potty, but she would cry every time she had to go poop. It ended up being a constipation problem in which she would hold it in so long that it would hurt even more to go. She was first put on a laxative which I thought was too much. Another doctor recommended mineral oil. I'd check to see if constipation due to fear of going is the problem. Your child's doctor would be able to tell if it is and you could ask for the dosage of mineral oil to try. Mineral oil does not make them go, it just lubricates so they can't hold it in.

I hate to admit this, but I resorted to bribery, and it worked. My son wanted tiki wiki volcano water toy, so I told him that it was only for big boys that pooped in the potty all the time. I told him every time he pooped in the potty I would give him $3.oo to save for tiki wiki. After about a week and a half of him pooping in the potty every day, we went and bought tiki wiki. Told him that if he started giving me a hard time about pooping in potty, I would give tiki wiki to a big boy that did poop in potty. He was finally totally toilet trained.

HI B.
Children don't like to be told, but they DO like to DO what they see you DO. SOOOO, as silly as this sounds, the next time you have to go poop, ask your child if he wants to say good-buy to your poop. Then take him to your potty, show him the poop in there, then wave GOOD-BYE POOP out loud, and then flush it and let your child watch. He may get a kick out of that and tell him when he goes poop in his potty, that he and you can wave good bye to his poop too! Good luck

Okay, I know that this is going to sound crazy, but I will just share what has worked for us~ Super Heroes! LOL ! I know crazy right? My 2 1/2 year old refused to go to the potty for so long, then finally I came up with the crazy idea to tell him to go like Hulk or Spider Man -His favorites. I reassure him, because at times he acts like he is scared so I may rub his legs always tell him you can do it! Do it like.... and then we've even discussed mommy goes on the potty and so does .... You're such a big boy! I always praise him and then since we usually only have contact with his father by phone (only home 4 days a month) I tell his daddy in front of him that my son went poopy on the potty like ..... and my son loves to know that I am bragging about him.... Hey, this has helped me. I know it sounds crazy, but no more dirty diapers! Just thought I'd share!

My son just turned 3 and I've gotten him to start pooping on the potty with chocolate bribes. Yes, he gets an M&M or a small toddler chocolate cookie when he goes poop on the potty. He isn't to the point where he tells me--I look for the signs of him needing to go and then remind him that if he poops on the potty he gets a treat...which motivates him to try.
Besides that, giving them some time to get it out helps too. We usually read through a Richard Scary book since there are so many things to look at--it gives him the time he needs...

Since he is already pee trained, I hope you don't follow any advice to "wait and try in a few months"--- what are you supposed to do while you wait? Put him back in diapers? I hope you don't do that!! My daughter did the cycle of holding it and then getting constipated and then the painful poop for so long that it actually screwed up her little body and stretched things out so much from the big poops that we ended up at a gastroenterologist. I had no idea it was VERY common and wished I'd just spoken with her pediatrician about it when she was little. Your ped will recommend either mineral oil, Miralax, or Milk of Magnesia. M of M is what the gasteronterologist suggested, but my daughter wouldn't drink it, so we used Miralax and it worked like a charm. It's not a laxative so it won't make your child feel the need to run to the potty-- it's a stool softener so it makes the poop not so painful-- although if they have already pushed out big hard poops, be aware that there could be a fissure or 2-- which is a small tear in the rectum-- you can actually see it, so you should take a look-- my pediatrician showed me on my daughter-- she had 2-- poor baby!! Vaseline is the only thing you can do for it-- keep it clean and put vaseline after every time they wipe (or you wipe them) and let it heal on it's own. I do recommend speaking with your pedictrician before it gets too bad

I will tell you what a friend of mine did. She explained to her son that the potty is where his poop wants to be...at the "party in the potty" with Mommy & Daddy's poop. Let him watch you and your husband go potty and maybe have him flush the toilet for you and wave bye-bye and say "have fun at the party" make a real big deal of it when he goes poops on the potty. As for what I did, I used Sugar Free Gummie Bears to get my kids to go on the big potty...I know all of the above sounds a little out there, but remember it's only temporary and so many of us Mom's have had to do much sillier things to survive different stages. God Bless & Have fun with it all ~ they grow so fast.
I am a SAHM w/ 3 1/2 year old boy/girl twins and have been married to a wonderful man/Dad for almost 14 years now.
P.S. I just read Kim's and the other responses. I didn't start potty training until the kids turned 3. They just had a better understanding of the expectations I had...but each child is different. My neice was constipated as a toddler too. If your son didn't poop once or twice a day with diapers, then maybe you should ask your ped. about a suppository too.

We were having poo-poo problems too with our 3 year old so we went to the Dollar Tree and gots lots of little toys and created the Treasure Box. Everytime he poops in the potty he gets to pick 1 toy. Worked so much better than we anticipated and we only had maybe 1 accident since we started using it!