Homeschoolers Please Help!

Updated on June 01, 2010
S.H. asks from Neptune, NJ
6 answers

I’ve homeschooled both of my children at ages 3 and 4 yrs. When my son (he is 8) was old enough for public school I fought with my family members to keep him at home and eventually lost the battle. He is very smart and was bullied mercilessly for the first 3 years of school. He eventually learned to stop raising his hand and that befriending the bullies will keep him from being their target. I have yet to get a notice from the school but I have seen behavior around the neighborhood I am really unhappy with. (picking on a 4 year old comes to mind right off the top of my head) When I asked the school to please intervene I was told that the school policy is to allow the children to pick their friends. While I don't have a problem with him picking his own friends I know for a fact one of the boys has an older brother that is in a gang and he has told my son as soon as he is 9 they can try to get in. Needless to say this DOES NOT appeal to me. I now face sending my 5 year old daughter to the same school (next year) and am back to fighting the homeschooling battle. This time however my husband is completely on board so it would be us against in-laws which we know we can handle. I have been researching credited online home schools and think I have found one that sounds pretty good. I am wondering if there are any homeschooling parents who know anything about Trent School or if you even think buying a curriculum is necessary (it is not required by NJ law I just am worried about setting a curriculum if the state ever asks for documentation) Also if any of you took a child out of public school to home school I could really use some help with how to make that transition. My daughter is used to schooling at home and she works really well with me but my son resents being home and wants to go hang out with his friends instead of doing his lessons. The problem is at school all he is doing is wasting time and I refuse to watch his grades fall any further because he is trying to be “cool” so he doesn’t get beat up. Thanks for your help!

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So What Happened?

Thanks moms as always for your insight. We have made a decision and I feel really good about it. We will start homeschooling our daughter in the fall. We told our son he can finish out the 4th grade and then he is coming home to school with us. He isn't thrilled about it but it's really not up to him at this point. The in laws are still barking about it. We have politely explained that they are entitled to their opinions but we appreciate them not sharing them with our children. We'll see how it goes. I may be back during the school year with more questions as this is all new to us though so I thank you for your answers and hope you'll still be here if I need you in September. :)

More Answers

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C.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

I don't live in NJ so I don't know anything about that particular school. As for buying a curriculum it depends.There are a lot of free resources on the internet. But sometimes having a curriculum that has everything your child needs is easier. You can also look into online charter shcools they are free and provide you with all the curriculum you need. I did take my daughter out of public school. She was in kindergarten at the time so the transition was not difficult. we talked about it a lot before classes ended. We waited until the year was done and then started homeschooling in the fall so it wasn't a shock being pulled from her class. I am sure if you homeshcool you will see a huge difference in your children and hopefully so will you inlaws and they will be more supportive.Good Luck!

2 moms found this helpful

D.K.

answers from Sioux City on

I home-school and took my kids from a school setting to do it. I recommend being very scheduled for awhile. The tool that helps me the most are note cards. Each child receives a note card for each school day. On that note card I write my expectations for that day. It includes school assignments and chores. Each child is responsible for what is written on that card. They may check off everything that is completed as it is completed. At any time during the day I can ask for that card and direct that child to the next task. For the most part I expect them to complete everything on the card. If I find that they aren't working up to their ability, then computer, TV, and phone time is taken away.

I get flack all the time for my home-schooling decision. I don't care. I taught for many years in the private and public setting. I know that home-schooling is the best option for me and my children. I am also open to putting my children into a public or private school if I find one that would benefit my children.

PM me if you have any questions.

2 moms found this helpful

T.N.

answers from Albany on

It is not 'you against anyone' with regards to what's right for YOUR kids. You're the Mamma, you go with YOUR gut!

1 mom found this helpful
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J.B.

answers from Atlanta on

I'm not into homeschooling for a variety of reasons, but the important thing here in your request is that YOU are the parents!!! Your inlaws can think whatever they want, but this is YOUR decision! Do what you want in regards to your children's education because they do not belong to your inlaws -they belong to you! The only time I think they should have a say is if they're paying for private school tuition or something like that.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.H.

answers from Seattle on

In agreement with the other answers I have seen--YOU are in control of your kids' education. Stick with your guns!!!! I have three kids that have been in public school, private school, and have been homeschooled. I am currently homeschooling and I do like having a curriculum to start with. You can get a really basic curriculum like Alpha Omega lifepacs and supplement with other things. I just like having a base to start with. I have also done the K12 program through the public school district--check with your state and see if K12 does that--since it is throught he school district it pays for everything. One last thought--you can still use any of the resources at the public schools for your son. Also, you say he may resent it, but you are the one whose opinion matters the most, especially if he is starting to hang out with the wrong people and have a bad attitude. I communicate with my kids about the decision and get their input, but they know that the ultimate decision will be mine regarding whether they go to school or are homeschooled. There are plenty of opportunites to hang out with friends outside of school. If the only thing he will miss is hanging out with his "friends," and he is being asked to join a gang, is it worth it to send him to school? You have to do what's best for him even if he doesn't like it right now.

1 mom found this helpful
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C.M.

answers from Dallas on

You might want to look into some homeschooling books. I was looking at different colleges and a few requested a list of the books used if homeschooled. I know college is a long way a way, but best to be prepared.

Good luck! Sorry your son is having those issues at school. I'm dreading the time my daughter enters school!

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