Home Care Versus Day Care

My sister had 4 major changes in childcare arrangements in under a year --all, as you say, from 'outside their control.'

There is no single 'right' decision. Kids are happier and more settled in their own homes, with someone familiar and loving caring for them. It's finding someone familiar and loving... considering the money involved, it's often hard to get anyone capable who is willing.

There are excellent group childcare arrangements available, but there are many poor ones, too --guess which ones tend to have 'emergency' spots available?

I suggest taking some time in a quiet space, alone and undisturbed to think about what it is you want for your kids... specifically and generally, when it comes to how they are raised. Think about your family's values and how you want those transmitted. Think about the environment you want your kids in. Then make a 'wish list' for what would be ideal, in your mind. It might look like daydreaming, but it will give you a much better idea what (or who) you're looking for.

My sister quit her job. It was so stressful to constantly be under the gun to find something suitable, when she realized that she didn't have children so someone else could raise them... so she bit the bullet, learned a lot about frugal living and reorganized their finances so she could stay at home.

My husband's grandparents watched our daughter until she was 18 months old and then they became sick and could no longer do it. I had to switch my daughter to daycare quickly. The first daycare that we put her in was okay at first and then we started to have problems. I switched her to another daycare and she has been there ever since. I took her to the daycare to visit and she loved it. I have heard horror stories and about in home daycares and regular daycares. You just have to visit them and trust your gut feeling. I have my 4 year old and my 12 month old in daycare now. They seem to like the social time with the other kids but they do get sick a lot... It seems like they are constantly sick. I think that is the only downfall of daycare.
With in home care, I always worried about the person's house if it was someone that I didn't know... Do they child proof well enough, keep their house clean, etc... Most daycares are safe and well monitored and some even have cameras where you can check on your kids via the Internet anytime you want.

Personally, since your little one is so young, I would opt for a small in-home. She'll be able to nap when you want her to, she'd be getting more one on one, and sick a lot less.

I did daycare for 5 years. I prefer it compared to a center. Before I started my daycare, I spent a day observing in a center to see what it was like. I HATED IT. the kids had to do exactly what the "schedule" said no matter what. If it was time for THIS, then no exceptions. HOWEVER, I also personally know of a few bad home daycares. So make sure you listen to your gut instinct if you go this route and feel something is not right........

Our vet actually hired someone to come into his home and watch their kids. He said one of the kids was always sick at daycare but after they switched to a "nanny", it was much better. So, maybe that would be an option for you as well....... Or at least something to check out money wise if it would really even cost any more than daycare.......?

Every daycare or center is NOT going to be a good fit for EVERY child. Visit during daycare hours and bring your kids with so you can see how they feel about the place. See how the provider interacts with the daycare children.

My daughter transitioned over from a home setting to a daycare setting when she was 2. It was seemless for her. (My son has always been in a daycare setting.) My best suggestion is to call around & get a feel for your favorite 2 or 3. Then, go in person & see what you like. Then, take your children. Get a feel for how you interact with the teachers, and then how your children interact with the teachers & other kids. That should really give you a good sense about who/where you're leaving your children with. You can also get referrals from other parents & see how they like it.

I hope that helps. Feel free to write back if you have any questions. Good luck! I know this is a hard decision!

Hi,

My niece had faced the similar situation a few months ago when her sitter moved back to her home country. My sister and I decided to do the best for her. We hired a part-time baby sitter for 3 days/wk and sent the daughter to a daycare 2 times a week. At that time, the daycare we chose was just opened and not many kids there yet (maybe it helped our girl a lot), there were only 3 kids, including her.

They can take care of her properly when there are less kids. Surprisingly, she had fun and started enjoying just in the first week. She was only 20months old at that time and completely fine.

I think your kids will be ok and will get used to with it in a few weeks. Start trying with only a few hours a week is really good. We let her stay there for over 4 hrs for the first time but I was with her the whole time on the first day. So she enjoyed it. My niece who has language confusion, due to many languages she is spoken to, now able to speak some words since she went to the daycare.

I think being involved in social groups effect their learning too. Well, there are many mismanaged daycares as well as big bully kids. So you have to be careful. I am not really sure about your daughter as she is a little bit too young for that, at least in my opinon. Listen for other moms suggestion and good luck.

If you go to a daycare, I think your kids will be fine. Your 16 month old will probably be facinated with all the other 'little kids' and will probably start excelling in areas (playing alone, sharing). I wouldnt worry about going from 2 naps to 1 because your 16 month old needs to get to that soon anyway. My baby girl has taken 1 nap per day since 12 months and I love it. When she goes to sleep at night, she is out for 11 to 12 hours. You 3 year old may have a harder time, but should adapt fine if you encourage it as a positive experience.
On a bad note, since they have never been in a daycare facility they might get a cold more often. If they start soon, you are getting them in at a good time since kids are not as sick in the winter.
my personal opinion is a daycare facility vs home daycare - the daycare facility is better. The one I chose is mandated by the state to serve all the proper food groups and the caretakers have all the kids on schedules. My 16 month old is already getting the hang of the ABC song, knows her name, age and what the sound of 8 animals make. I know I didnt teach her that.
Good luck with your decision. either one you make, make it on what YOU feel is best for your family. Also keep in mind that if you dont like one, you can always change

I have 4 boys. When I had my 4th (3 years ago), I pulled them all out of a daycare and hired an at home babysitter. I loved that the younger ones got the attention and got to stay home and I have to admit, didn't get sick very much. (At the Daycare my 3rd son was sick constantly almost for 13 months). I have recently put the little ones them back into daycare, but not the same as where they were. In the 3 months that they have been there we have had the general colds and an ear infection so that isn't bad.

I read what Miranda said about the 'schedule'. I like the idea of a schedule because that is what they will have to do at school when they start. The nap, she is still young enough that they may let her have the second nap.

Only you know what is best for your children. My 2 youngest ones really love going to 'school' now but it was an adjustment. My 4 year old's class is also a preschool class so he is excelling at writing letters and doing a lot of stuff he wouldn't get to do until he went to school.

And besides, this is the only place they will get the opportunity to paint with their feet - I don't think I'd have the patience for letting them do it!

Good luck,
L.