Help..My Daughter Has Been Pulling Her Eyelashes Out!!

As a previous poster indicated, there is an OCD condition where people pull out their hair, including the eyelashes, eyebrows, and head hair. They may pull one thing or everything! The condition (and I'm probably misspelling it) is called Trichatomania. I'm not saying that's what your daughter has, but it can be the beginning of it. Do talk to the pediatrician about it. I think they work to break the habit via behavior modification therapy (some posters have suggested forms of this, such as finding a fringed blanket to substitute). I think in more extreme cases, drug therapy is recommended to reduce anxiety. Good luck!

Hi K.,
I don't know a lot about this, but my daughter got into the habit of pulling her eyelids by holding on to her eyelashes and pulling as a method of falling asleep. She hasn't removed eyelashes yet, but I wonder if it would have progressed to that. She has always had trouble getting to sleep on her own and has shown some OCD ways to attempt to relax at night (like putting her hands together, then apart, then together, then apart, over and over). When I see her doing the eyelash/eyelid thing, I just tell her to twirl her hair instead and sometimes I have to physically remove her hand (she'll resist a little) from her eye and put her hand on her hair. I haven't seen her do this in a long time now so I'm hoping that's what did the trick.

When people start a habit, the more they do it, the more their brain thinks that they need to do it (like addiction though instead of physical, this is physiological). So the solution is to retrain the brain. You can help your daughter by suggesting she replace this action with something else. If you talk about it, she can be conscious of it so that every time she starts to pull her eyelashes, she needs to do the other thing instead (whatever you come up with, maybe get a fringy type blanket that she can pull the strings). It will take a while, but you can retrain the brain to stop certain habits. I also highly suggest talking to your Pediatrician because obviously I could be wrong and it could be something else. I just wanted to make the point that sometimes little habits get out of hand (we don't realize we are doing something like that) and then we don't understand why we are doing it, but we just know we "need" to do it. So I hope this helps. Feel free to send me a message if you'd like to talk more. K.

It sounds like she is having some anxiety. I experienced it when I was a child. Try to look at how you are sending her messages about performing (school, social activities, extra-curricular activities). You may not be aware of your language. She may be picking up some kind of pressure and feeling a little scared. A.

My son did the same thing, when he was in 7th grade. He said he started doing it because
a lash or two had been growing in the wrong direction and were bothering his eye. I guess he didn't like having a bare spot, so he made both eyelids look the same...lashless! Then I guess it became a nervous habit. The next summer, when we visited cousins, aunts and uncles that we hadn't seen for a year, they all noticed and said "What happened to your eyelashes!?" After that, he stopped doing it. It hadn't been enough for just Mom and Dad to tell him he should stop. I know it is extremely distressing when your child is doing this, but I think it's a stage that will pass. If it's time for your daughter to have a check-up, maybe you could ask the dr. (ahead of time, so your daughter won't know you suggested it) to ask your daughter what happened to her eyelashes and then explain why she needs them. I hope it all works out.

While I've not had any personal experience with this, I had a friend growing up that had this same issue. From what I understand, there's an actual condition related to the pulling of hair from the body. I'm not in any way suggesting that's what your daughter has, but it may be something to rule out before it progresses. I'm thinking perhaps your Pediatrician could give you some information or advice on how best to handle this? The gal I know pulls out her eyelashes, eyebrows, hair from her head so she has to deal with bald spots, and from what I hear even pulls hair from her private area. I believe her case to be fairly extreme, but I've known a couple of people with this type of condition. Perhaps if she were developing symptoms of this true condition, you can intervene before it gets too far progressed. On the flip side, it could be behavioral, but before getting on her too much about it you may want to inquire with your doctor. If it isn't something she can contiously control, then you won't want her to get in trouble for it as that would just add humiliation and likely lead to larger issues for her. I don't know how much help this is, but hopefully it will at least give you some guidance. I'm sure you'll be able to resolve her situation favorably!

I'll be praying for you both!