Help with a Picky 14Mth Old

My son is the same way!
I've found that if I make soups or stews and give him the vegetables from that, he likes them. He also likes omlets with cheese... it doesn't matter what else we put in them. I have done salsa, my husband has made veggie and cheese ones... as long as he tastes the cheese, he's okay with anything else. Maybe it'll work for you, too!

Hey M.,
I just bought the cookbook Decepively Delicious. http://www.deceptivelydelicious.com/site/
I am not a cook at all but I can do these! It has lots of great recipies and they are very easy.
Good Luck!
K.

This is a normal stage but if you don't put an end to it now then you are setting you and her up for a rough future. These children turned into picky toddlers and then into picky kids. Other parents will hate to see them come to play because they will be so picky. You may have a rough week but put what you want her to eat in front of her with no choices and when she gets hungry enough, she will come back to eat it. I know it sounds horrible but I had to learn the hard way. I catered to my oldest and didn't make that mistake with my other two. My oldest continued to be picky and she's now 18. You are doing her an injustice by not making it end.

Good luck,
D.

When my kids were little we had the same problems. What we found was we caved in to fast when they wouldn't eat when we had offered. After some time they would start eating what ever we put in fount of them, what it sounds like to me is that your little one has figured out that if she waits just a bit longer that you will giver here what she wants. About the Milk thing, she may be mildly Lactose talerint this would explain why she can handle more 2% that whole. Try soy milk. You may see a big difference. Hope this helps in some way. :)

First let me tell you that I'm totally lucky - my daughter will eat just about anything. I, on the other hand, was an extremely picky eater. If you let her get away with it now, it might be a problem for you through her early adult years. I truly believe that my health suffered from my pickiness-induced lack of nutrition. Not necessarily when I was two, but when I was older and competing athletically.

When our daughter was little, we talked to our Dr. about it (since I was concerned) and he said that it is physicallly impossible for a toddler to starve themselves. He said to offer her a range of foods, but not to give in to the same thing over and over.

I'm a fan of sneaking veggies in. That is how I learned to overcome my own pickiness. Some things I do:

1) Cut up tomatoes and/or spinach into tiny pieces (you can do a small bag that will last a week) and wrap the cheese or turkey around it so it's still a small bite, but the new food is hidden. Gradually, she'll eat the food in the middle too, as she gets used to the texture and taste. If she spits out the food in the middle, try cutting it even smaller. I've had to reintroduce tomatoes to my daughter this way a couple of times. Now she's back to eating big chunks without any other food.

2) If she'll eat soup you can sneak pureed veggies in with that. For example, add pureed peas (or pea baby food) into tomato soup.

3) If she'll eat Mac N Cheese, buy a little broccoli and add a little bit of the very tops - cut it off high enough that it falls into the pasta like sprinkles. Be careful the first few times not to do too much or it will overwhelm the taste and she might reject it. As she gets used to it you can add more and more.

4) My favorite thing in the world is a little product called "Super Tots" by Ian's foods. I can only get it at the health food store, but they're french fries with carrots, spinach, and cauliflower added in. They're doing all the work for me!

The trick, for me, was to get a little used to the flavor and texture without being overwhelmed by it.

Hopefully my tricks will work on your daughter. I definitely use some of this sneakiness on mine and we have great results. She'll seriously eat just about anything now and she's two. The other night she ate an adult size serving of the lasagna I made, including the artichokes I hid in the ricotta cheese!

NEVER offer another meal!She won't let herself starve.I know you were just concerned but you have gave her the mindset that she doesn't have to eat what you put in front of her because if she doesn't you will let her have her favorite things later.It may take several times but you need to stop allowing her to eat something else later.I know it may sound harsh but she eats what you are having for dinner or she doesn't eat.You have to be strong for her.If you try this and you feel bad and give in you will have to start the process over again!If she will not eat at lunch/dinner then put her plate in the fridge and when she gets hungry again offer that same plate of food.Do NOT let her have a snack until snack time!If she acts hungry in an hour because she refused lunch/dinner she still needs to wait til snack time.Again I know it sounds harsh but you need to do this to teach her.I had to go through this with my daughter so I know it's hard.I also know the long time affects that it has on people my Husband who I have been with for over 11 years has been a very unhealthy eater since we have met.I have influenced him some but not completely.Anyway when he was a child if he did not like what was served for dinner he was allowed to get up and make PB & J.She also had 5 kids and prepared several veggies so that none of them had to eat the veggies they didn't like.My Husband still to this day eats very few veggies.So please be strong for your daughter and realize that she will not starve even if it seems she's not eating at all.Another thing is make sure you don't allow her to fill up on milk right before or during her meals.Set her drink where she can't reach it and give it to her after she's ate some food.Another thing that might help get some veggies in is hiding them.Chop them up really small and put them in things.Mashed potatoes,mac and cheese,other things that she really likes.Also try preparing the veggies different ways.Sometimes they just don't like how it's prepared.For example: My children LOVE broc. but if I order it at a resturant they won't eat it.The resturants usually just steam it and they like it soft.One last thing you said she really likes fruit and that's good.However if you are trying to get her to eat more of other food you need to wait to put it on her plate.I worked in daycare for six years and am now a stay at home Mom of three and I also take care of my niece and cousin.Anyway I have found that if they like fruit they will eat it first.So I set in on the table and wait for them to eat other things before they get fruit.If they point to or ask for fruit I tell them I will be glad to give you some as soon as you eat your chicken,veggies (whatever is on their plate that day.)You don't even have to make her clean her plate before she gets fruit.It will encourage her to eat what's on her plate.Another thing that I have been taught(by working in daycare and my own kids and also taking a food class for children when I worked in daycare) kids can feel over whelmed by how much you put on their plate.Remember a todd's tummy is only as big as their fist do if you fill up the plate it over whelms them.A serving for a child is a Table spoon for every year of age.So make sure you are giving her small amounts and if she eats that offer more to her.Example: I only start my 2 year old out with two Chicken nuggets.Aslo make sure that you do not use food as a reward.I know this is not a problem now but it's something to think about.I know if you are desperate to get her to eat it might be tempting and then that causes eating habits in the opposite direction.Sorry I wrote a book,LOL,but I sure hope some of this will help you.This is just something I have happend to go through more than once.If you want to chat more here's my email ____@____.com care,C.

I think this is normal stage. They are seeing what they can control and figuring out their own likes and dislikes. Always put the veggies on her plate and try to get her to eat just one bite. Tell her she only has to have one bite. Eventually she should be back to eating veggies. As far as the ear infections, please take her to the chiropractor. I've done this with many of my children and it works.
Mom of 9

Hi M.. While researching for an answer to Mandi, I came across this article, and have copied it here for you re ear infections. I don't know if your baby is still on the bottle:

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Why should toddlers drink milk from a cup instead of a bottle?

At the age of one most children should be drinking liquids from a cup and no longer using a bottle.

Milk in the bottle can cause problems because:

Your child's teeth can become damaged ("baby bottle tooth decay") by the constant wash of milk, which has natural sugars in it, against his teeth. This can cause problems with his adult teeth.

Your toddler needs a wide variety of foods and that means milk is just a small part of his diet. Children are more likely to drink too much milk if it is put in a bottle.

Your child may gain too much weight.

Your child may suffer from ear infections (especially if given at night or when napping).
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About picky eaters. Friends of ours would come over with their elementary aged sons who were very picky eaters. They brought over cans of tuna with mayo so she could make them tuna sandwiches if they didn't like the food we were serving. She was embarrassed, but didn't want her kids to make a fuss.

I had a son who didn't like peas. When he was 3, he had to eat 3 peas, when he turned 4, he had to eat 4 peas, etc. Eventually he came to like them. We always encouraged (made) our kids take one bite of new foods. However, they were each allowed to have only one food they didn't like and didn't have to eat. As adults today, they will eat just about anything and are always willing to try new tastes.

My first child had constant ear infections from 1 yr old to 18 months. I suspected food allergies. I removed all dairy from his diet for a year and he has not had an ear infection since...and he is 6 1/2 years old now. Check into food allergies before going on any more antibiotics or ear tubes!! By the way, dairy is not causing problems with him now. And there are several options for calcium. Check into it!

My second child is also a picky eater. Rule at our house is you have to take one bite of everything on your plate. Don't take a bite, no snacks or dessert. Last night he wouldn't touch anything on his plate. So he went to bed with no food. I've discovered with him, he will eat when he is hungry. I just don't stress or fight over it anymore. He is 3 1/2 and I give him the choice. To sit with us at the dinner table or go to bed. Well, he sat with us, but refused to eat. He tries this power struggle bit about once a week. Now, when he wakes up this morning, I know he will be hungry and will eat breakfast.
By the way, my doctor recommended this method to me because I too was frustrated and gave in to him. Need to remember that you are the parent and know what is best for them.

Best Wishes,

J. H.

I'm a great grandma and I remember just one of my 4 children being a very picky eater. My son would only eat hot dogs at one point. Our doctor said that so long as he did not lose weight took his daily vitamin suppliment and drank milk that there was no need to worry and that the child's eating pattern would change a lot in the first year or so after he started to feed himself. The doctor was right. Now my son is a healthy 35 year old with an 11 mo old who eats everything and is not picky at all. Go figure!

Maybe she is a dipper. I would get veggies that my son could dip in dressing or peanut butter and he liked doing that and ate the veggies too. I wouldn't worry too much about her not wanting to try everything. She will come around when she is ready to try new things.

My daughter at that age loved green beans and would feed them to herself whole. Now, she doesn't so I have to cook them with cream of chicken or cream of mushroom soup to get her to eat them. I guess you could say that we disguise them. Good luck to you, hope this helps:)

As far as quick and easy recipes, I use foodtv.com and plug in a couple of ingredients. I love 30-minute meals and so does my son who is also a picky eater. I wish I could give you some magical formula, but really kids will eat what they want and how much. You should know by now you can't really make them do anything they don't want. LOL! Babies are really good regulators of what they need all by themselves. I've been worried about my son a few times. For at least a week he wouldn't eat anything he couldn't carry around with him while he walked. As long as your pediatrician isn't concerned I wouldn't worry about it. Just keep offereing her the stuff she doesn't like and maybe one day she'll eat it. Good luck!

Sounds normmal to me. I would just keep offring her the same veggies till she tryes it. They say it takes 21 times for them to eat something new. My twins will only try something if I am eatting it. So I get them to try it that way. If thy like it I give it to them at the next meal. Im not sure about the ear infctions and diet. I would see an ent. hth C.

I'm a bit of a picky eater myself, although much better than I was when I was younger. Lots of good suggestions here - I'm filing them away for when our little one gets to a picky phase (we just started her on baby food and so far, so good - she eats everything!). One other thing I heard, which may be better for kids who are a little bit older, is to not fix them a plate. This is mostly for the power struggle element. For example, if your kid asks what's for dinner and throws a fit because you made spaghetti and he says he doesn't like spaghetti, only set the table for the two of you. When he asks where his plate is, say you didn't want spaghetti, so I didn't make any for you. Suddenly, it will become very appealing. A bit of reverse psychology. Don't know if it will work on your little one yet, but maybe this will be helpful to file away for later.

Hi M.,

Just keep offering her things over and over. Also you can start with 1 meal like breakfast, and lets say she likes pancakes and she eats it all. The next day try something else for breakfast. The next day go back to pancakes but this time blend up some strawberries and/or blueberries and put in there. Then build off that.

For lunch try pizza or mac and cheese add peas and carrots to your mac and cheese. Make a home made pizza and make it a vegetable pizza.

If nothing else when you offer her things show her how to dip it. You are teaching her something and she is learning at the sametime along with eating. Use things like ranch and kethup and a mild bar-b-que sauce.

This can be typical of toddlers, but that doesn't make it any easier. The others who responded are right, that the healthy eating habits you instill now will serve her for the rest of her life.

It can take 12-14 times for a new food to be introduced before a child will eat it. So, be persistant and don't give up. She may not like certain textures, so try preparing foods in different ways: steamed, mashed, or chopped etc. (i.e., if she doesn't like the texture of mashed potatoes, try them steamed and diced).

Be sure to offer a variety of healthy fruits and vegetables. She is probably old enough to help you wash fruits and veggies--get her involved. Ask her to help you pick out healthy foods at the grocery store. Talk about the different colors and textures. Let her hold some in the shoppig cart. Then, at dinner, talk about how you picked these foods out together. This wil be more important as she gets older. Also when she is older, talk about how your healthy food helps you to grow big and strong and which kinds of foods are healthy.

Be a good role model. Eat healthy foods yourself. Also use table manners and she wil pick up on that.

As far as actually getting her to eat different foods, do not offer alternatives when she won't eat what you have prepared. If she doesn't want it, don't force her to eat, but offer the same thing next time she is hungry that night. Give her the same thing YOU are having for dinner, it just may need to be cooked longer so it's softer, etc. Try not to make a big fuss over dinner and try to avoid power struggles. You could say, "That's ok, you don't have to eat now, I'll save it for you for later." And then drop the issue. You are in charge and you are not a short order chef. She is still young enough that you can have an influence on developing healthy eating habits.

A good book is Jessica Seinfeld's "Deceptively Delicious" where she hides veggies in other foods. She mentions this in the book, but I want to stress the importance of offering fresh fruits and veggies on her plate IN ADDITION to putting them inside other foods so she gets used to them.
Take care!

i have to laugh hun and i dont mean to .. i have a 14 year old son that is like that and a husband who will not eat most veggies , there is a solution but shhhhh one will never know ... if you have a food proccer then start placeing veggies in that and putting them in sauces like speggitt.. you be amazed what they will eat when they dont know it is in there.. for my 14 year old son he wont tough carretts or mushrooms bellpeppers ect but if i place them in the food proccers and grind it up and throw it in a speggitti sauce he never knows it is there and he eats it up he gets his veggies and i sit back and laugh when he tells me how good it is ..
Barara

I have a 14 month old too! It seems that lately she's been more picky, and eating less. I think they just tend to eat less at this age, getting into things instead. I wouldn't force it unless she is having gaining issues. I find that if I give her very little, she is more likely to eat it and ask for more. I give her choices too, it seems that one time she'll eat a ton of grapes, but next time won't, etc. I put things she won't eat on her tray too, because they say you have to give it to them so many times before they like it. I usually don't try too hard to give my girls cooked regular meals (though I always give them what we are eating at dinner), I find that they'll think of different things as a meal, and I figure if the day or week is balanced, it's okay. For instance, I don't usually give a sandwich, but I will give a bread product, a protein product, veggies, fruit, cheese. My 14 month old doesn't seem to usually want dairy products, but I guess she prefers human milk! A few veggies my kids seem to like are steamed broccoli (fairly well steamed), edamame, red pepper, beans (right out of the can or out of my chili)... Try anything. We try to pick out new things at the store to try. They seem to eat things better if they see me eating it too, so eat healthy yourself. I think eating healthy is the most important thing you can do to get your kids to eat healthy (SNEAK the bad stuff!). My older daughter was a dipper, anything was good in dip (and anything worked as a dip). Also, here is a good link. I love Dr Sears, and here's the 17 tips on feeding toddlers. http://www.askdrsears.com/html/3/T030800.asp

askdrsears.com is a great resource for all kinds of things! I hope something here helped...

K..

I once read somewhere that when a child is picky and you can't get them to eat their vegetables, to give them Pizza. Of course you can make homemade with Low Fat Mozzarella cheese and put your own meats and vegetables on there. The mixture of the flavors are awesome and it is very rare for a kid to turn down pizza.

BTW...I have twin daughters and one loves food and the other is more of a Potato and meat eater. The picky eater was very picky up until the age of 5 years old. I stayed consistent with her and kept putting foods on her plate whether she liked them or not. If she ate them, it was a bonus, if not, I didn't fret as long as she was growing. I also gave her pediasure to ensure that she got her nutrients.

Good Luck!

My daughter now 17 mo's old is the same way. She has foods she loves and refuses to try new things. I just keep offering the foods and noticecd that she eats things better if she sees other ppl eating them. For instance I couldn't get her to try fish sticks and she saw her grandpa eating them and now she loves them. Good luck.