Help My Toddler Keeps Getting Hurt at Daycare...

Just a little perspective, mine have never been in day care in their lives yet in the toddler years there was always a bruise, a black eye, a scratch, bump, or bite mark from siblings. Its hard to see your kids get hurt. When its on your watch your realize its inevitable. But on someone else watch, you always have to wonder if there was adequate supervision. But anytime kids are in groups, this stuff is bound to happen no matter how much supervision there is.

You pay forthe privledge to be there. Let your money do the talking.

Tell them resolve the situation by either removing the child who bites or stoping the behavior OR you are removing your children from their care. If they act to calm about the situation tell tjem you are calling CPS or what ever licenseing place they answer to.

I'm a bit surprised they don't know what to do. My kids never did daycare, so I'm not entirely sure, but I would think they have no obligation keep a child in daycare that continues to harm other children. In fact, it's a huge liability for them because by keeping this one child, she's about to lose your two and probably others who are fed up with it. Have you asked what their policy is and at what point they will say enough is enough with this child?

In my personal opinion (having worked in a daycare
and babysat a lot), I would strongly suggest that the parents and workers curb this other child's biting and violent behavior or have him removed from the daycare. It's not worth it to the daycare to lose who knows how many clients on the account of one child who is disrespectful, mean and physical. Also, is it just your child who is being treated badly by this other child? If so, perhaps insist the children not be together unless someone is there to WATCH them. Sounds a little like the daycare is either not diligent in watching the children or this is just a kid who knows when to attack with no supervision. Either way, your child should not be treated in a way like you described. Good child care is hard to find, and best of luck in working this out. Please let us know how it resolves!

I'd be letting them know that if they don't remove that biter, either by having him removed from your child's class room or from the school, you'll be removing your two children. If they can't keep that child from hurting other children, you don't want yours there to be his punching/biting/scratching targets.

I mean, my kid got scratched once, and both that girl's parents and the daycare provider were on top of it and it never happened again. Accident's happen, my kid comes home with bruises all up her legs from falling while playing, and that's fine, because I know that's what happened and I'm happy to see that she's active (plus she inherited the klutziness from my side of the family, and is old enough to relay the falls that caused most of the bruises), but if another kid was repeatedly hurting her, we'd be outta there.

If your child is around other children, whether it be in daycare or with you at the park, there is a chance that they will get hurt. It only takes a second for a child to hit or bite another child. What you have said does not indicate that the daycare is not doing a good job. Neither of my kids went to daycare. Both of my children have been victims of such incidents, and one of my kids was actually the perpetrator, twice! Your child is not in danger. These types of injuries are pretty minor.

but they don't know what else to do about it.

WHAT?????

What kind of daycare is this? I've always had my daughter in a daycare center that had a binder of behavior protocol. I've always had to sign a form that indicated EXACTLY what would happen if my child hurt other kids.

This is not a place I would keep my daughter.

toddlers bite.. hit kick .. the toddler room is a dangerous place.. there is most likely 1 teacher for every 4 kids.. and there is no way the teachers can be located between each child to prevent injuries all day long.

I do not blame the day care..

However if there is one particular child that is very aggressive or a known biter..those kids often have to be removed from the class to protect ther other kids... so the center should be looking at removing him.

I think you should inform them about this.If they do nothing take your child out and go to another.

Yes, there are biters in a 2 year old room. No need to panic. But it is strange that they don't know what to do about it. I would expect them to put a plan in place to keep the other kids safe from the biter. For example, the director should be placing an extra teacher in that room to shadow the biter and prevent him from getting into situations where biting might occur (eg, as soon as he starts to wrestle over a toy, he should be redirected before he gets to the frustration point and bites). I would meet with the director in person, and push her to take concrete steps, such as shadowing, to address it, and let her know that if she doesn't, you'll have to look elsewhere.

Do they have video tapes? I would request to see the tapes. See exactly what is going on.

Use your mommy gutt. Do you think there is more they can do to prevent this? Do you think they are not doing right by your child? Only you can answer that.

I do know that my kids have been in daycare and gotten hurt, accidentally. My son had a bruise on his cheek for 4 months from a fall. I did not pull him because I believed that he fell plain and simple.

Good luck.

I'd tell the director how you're feeling but the teachers are not just ignoring your child. If you've ever worked in child care you know just how fast kids can strike out. They're doing the best they can. This other child could have one staff working with him alone and still get at least one child per day. It's just going to happen.

I think that they need to file an incident report and you should get a copy of that report. Talk to the teachers. Talk to the director. Your child is going to be moving up to the 2 year old room in a couple of months. They may have a totally different set up and that boy may not even be around your child for months.

All normal for his age group, what is not normal is how the director is handling it. She should have an extra staff member shadowing the child who is biting to help get the issue under control, and keep the other children safe. This child sounds like he is targeting your son now so I would suggest you suggest to the teachers to make sure they play in different groups, and try to keep them apart as much as possible right now. Also, I am know all states have different teacher/ child ratio's but make sure they are compliant and within their ratio. Accidents do happen, and fighting, hitting, and biting do as well. However there are ways to keep things more structured and keep a close eye. At my center we do mostly center based activities. Which keeps order in the classroom, allows the staff to view things easier, keeps the kids busy. Free play I find is when most of the negative behaviors present themselves. You can still have free play but with the centers it is small groups in each area which keeps things under control. Talk to the director again, and suggest an extra staff member until they get the other child under control. Good luck!!

Don't they have a behavior policy??? Wouldn't they ask the child to leave after so many incidents of hurting others? While this may be normal toddler behavior, they need to correct it. They need to have someone on top of this boy ready to intervene when they see he's getting frustrated. If they're not able to do that, they should tell his parents to find another center. If they won't do that, then you should start looking for a new center and bring this issue up when interviewing.

Y., here's the thing. You didn't receive an accident report either time. ESPECIALLY the thing with the eye. What were they thinking? Did they just hope you wouldn't notice?

I'd be getting your son to the ped and tell him what is going on at the daycare. I'd be VERY worried that there is a scratched cornea or a possible infection looming. An eye that is swollen is something that needs to be seen by the doctor. I'd also take a picture of your son and tell the school that they either keep that child away from your child or you will call social services to come investigate them. THAT will help them to decide what to do to fix this issue.

I'd leave them and tell them why. See if they'd rather have your business, with 2 children, or that of the biter's family. If they let you go, then good riddance to them.

The first part of the problem is the ratios in FL. If you children are in a "1 year old room" the ratio of staff to child is 1 adult for every 6 children in the room. If your children are in the "2 year old room", the ratio is 1 adult to every 11 children in the room. As a former teacher in a daycare setting in FL, let me tell you that these ratios are insane! It is very likely that the teacher is doing what she can to keep an eye on things, but toddlers are quick. If she is trying to keep an eye on 6 or more toddlers at a time (class of 12 toddlers with 2 adults), things happen even quicker. The other problem is the way the situation is being handled. You should be given an accident report, telling you what happened and how your child was cared for. The daycare center should also have a policy for how to handle "biters". I realize this is a stage that all children go through, however, you should not have to deal with daily biting incidents. I would definitely speak up and talk to the teacher and the director about your concerns. You may also want to double check on state rate ratios and find out how many kids are in class. That may give you better insight into how this keeps happening. Since you are a mom of twins you know better than anyone, how quickly 2 one year olds can destroy a room or break into a fight. Imagine having 6 or 12 of them at once and see if that changes your perspective.