HELP I Need Sleep! When Did You Get You Child to Sleep Through the Night

Hi K.,
We used the Miracle Blanket. It really saved us. My son could not wriggle out of it and slept great from the first night on.
Miracleblanket.com

My husband and I swear by it.
Hope this helps.

K.

The best swaddler I've found is the kiddopotamus - it's one of the most inexpensive too. I buy them on amazon.com. They can't writhe out of it, and they offer ones in cotton for warmer weather and felt for cold weather.

We have a 7 month old that is up 2 times each night, I feel that with the amount of growth and development that her waking is probably appropriate. So I can't help you on the when part but I can reccomend two books, the No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley and the Sleep Book by Dr. Sears. Both have 1,000 suggestions to help babies sleep better longer without "forceful" methods. Good luck!

-Sleepless mommy too!

Ok, I'm going to go against the American Pediatrics Assoc. and tell you that he would probably sleep better on his stomach. My Aunt is a neonatal nurse and she tells me that even in the hospital, they would place babies on their stomachs to sleep because it's a comfort to them. It makes them feel like they're being held, yet they can still move if they want to. Don't use any blankets in the bed, just dress him warmly. Also, make sure that his sheets are pulled tight to the mattress so that they won't bunch up. You might also try putting him in his own room. Sometimes they wake up and they see or hear you and want to be with you because they know that you are there. I have 3 kids and have always laid them on their stomach to sleep. I also read this book called Babywise and it was my saving grace! It teaches us to train our babies to eat, play, and sleep in a proper cycle so that their bodies can function at their best. My kids all slept through the night when they were around two months old. It didn't just happen though, I followed the teachings of the book. Hope this helps!

You might try putting a diffuser in the room with relaxing essential oils to induce sleep and keep his body relaxed during the night so he doesn't wake himself. There are many relaxing herbs you can use, such as Lavender, Bay and Rose.

Hope this helps.

M. M. Ernsberger
Certified Herbalist

K.,
My advice is to move your little guy into his own room. You all will sleep better. It will be easier to let him squawk a little also if he isn't in your room. That separation w/ your first baby is difficult because it seems like the first move toward him growing up. I have 3 little girls & every time I moved one of them out of our room, it was a little difficult. However, we all slept better because of it. Hope that helps. :)

- C.

Both of my children started sleeping through the night (about 8 hours) by three months old. Both were swaddled until they were around five months old. They grew out of the receiving blankets very quickly, but we used something called The Miracle Blanket. It was awesome! They would fuss for about a minute in the blanket and then fall asleep. We moved each child out of our room fairly early on. I heard every little noise and could not get a bit of sleep even though the baby was sleeping. I also had to train myself to not rush into their rooms at the slightest noise. I was sad and a bit apprehensive about moving them into their own rooms, but it worked out well for all of us. Good luck!

My twins did not sleep through the night until they were 9 months old! However, they didn't both wake up every night and I was usually able to predict if the night was going to be a tough one with the following. A full tummy at bedtime, I added baby cereal to the bottle (dr. recomendation), when teething i give them motrin, then a warm bath, bed. I still put both my kids in pajamas and then sleepers on top of them. (I will even put a onsie in addition on cold nights) They stay warm and I don't worry about blankets. Put baby in a different room. My kids stayed in our room until they were 6 months old. (that was not by choice, we relocated here for my 9 year old step son and were in transition) at about 4 months olds is when I started to sleep on the couch. If they really needed me, they would cry load enough for me to hear. Last but not least, When I was (am) really desperate for sleep, i go to bed at the same time as them 7:30pm. Good Luck, it gets easier. =)

This goes against everything the doctor's will tell you but sometimes "mom knows best". My son is 3 months and still not sleeping through the night either (which is hard for me because both my girls were sleeping through the night by now) anyways I noticed the same thing about him that his arms and legs were constantly moving and waking him up so now here is the no no part... I put him on his tummy and he sleeps sooooooo much better!!! He can't move his arms and legs while on his tummy and now he is sleeping 5-7 hours at night. Also it wouldn't hurt to put him in a different room than you as well. Sometimes babies wake up and just cry for a couple minutes and then fall right back to sleep and if he is in another room then you wouldn't hear that and he would put himself back to sleep and you would never even have to be woken up for those moments.

I also think that Faith G's advice is very good as well!

WE tried "Healthy Sleep Habits,Happy Child" at 8 months. It seems to suggest starting at about 5 months because kids' sleep patterns are so different than ours until about that age. It's worked beautifully! I remember being where you are right now and it's pretty tough!

Hey K., I'm going to tell you what I did and maybe it might help. When I was in the process of going back to work, my little girl was 3 months old and was still not sleeping all night. So we kinda changed up our routine. We starting giving her a bath at night and used Johnson and Johnson's Bedtime Moisture Wash and followed it up with the Bedtime Lotion. We dressed her on the warm side too. She doesn't always leave the covers on, so we dressed her warmer.
Then the next thing we did was get her on some baby food. She had started sleeping 5 to 6 hours a night and then all of the sudden it was back to 1 or 2 hours. My mother kept saying, "She's hungry, get her on some baby cereal." So, I did and wow, what a difference it made!! She was sleeping 5 hours or more again.
She is now 18 months old and we have moved upto, believe it or not, showers. She loves them!! And she sleeps all night. Doesn't even wake up in the middle of the night for a diaper change and small bottle.
Might want to try that too. Have you or your husband get in the shower and then the other hand him over to you. Make the shower luke warm and see what happens. I look it at as a great massage tool. The water beating down on the body is a great relaxant. My daughter is usually asleep within the hour after taking hers.
Good luck and hope it helps.
S.

hi K. :) my advice is to take the crib out of your room! then you wont hear every little move he makes and when he does wake up he wont see you right away! then he'll be more likely to go back to sleep on his own. my son was four months old when we started doing this with him and it worked out really well. good luck! hope you get some sweat dreams soon :)

Personally, I would try putting him in his own room. There may be times that he will put himself back to sleep, but because he is right there, you are getting up with him. He is going to have to learn to self-sooth, so maybe finding some techniques on that subject might be a good place to start.

Also, typically babies don't need to be swaddled by the time they are about 3 months or so, some like to be swaddled longer, some hate it. And the blankets we used were called swaddle me blankets.

My first was so easy; bed around 8-9 and up again 4-5 and go to sleep again until 8 at 2 months old. My second will be 8 months tomorrow and still gets up once a night to nurse! AHHHH!

Hi K.,

It might help to move baby to the crib in another room. With both of my girls, I had them in the bassonet next to my bed for the first three months. Usually, I found that into the third month, I was waking up too much - I'd wake up to every little peep or movement. I realized that if I moved baby into her crib, then she could move around and even make a little noise, but not wake up because I wasn't there taking her out with every little thing.

Moving your son into a crib in his own room would allow both you and your son to get more sleep. oh -and you want to be careful about snuggling him in your bed - that could lead to some difficult-to-break habits.

I hope this helps.
C.

Is he hungry? Our daughter was lactose intolerant, so we had to bottle feed her soy milk. At 6 weeks I out a tsp of rice cereal into her bottle and opened the nipple a little so it would not clog and guess what???? She slept 8 hours the first night!!! From 6 weeks on her evening slumber steadliy increased to as much at 10 hours. My mother said it was a miracle, but I think the rice cereal helped.

I read the book On Becoming Babywise about eating and sleeping schedules and it's a big proponent of schedules. It is a little rigid for my liking (so I follow its ideas, but loosely), but it really gave me some great ideas for routines and how to get my baby to sleep which made such a difference for us once we started implementing them. I didn't like completely letting my kids cry and cry it out like the book recommends. I would recommend reading it (take what you like and discard the rest) because of the great ideas it offers, and I've heard that The Baby Whisperer is similar, but less rigid. I've also heard the "No Cry Sleep Solution" is terrific. Babywise gives you an idea of when they'll eat/wake/sleep for the different stages of the first year, and I really like that part of the book.

Bedtime routines are great. We change diaper, read a book, and sing a song before laying our baby down as our routine. As my son got older I added cleaning up toys at the very beginning of the routine. Kids thrive off of consistency, and knowing what to expect next gives them security. I personally like a schedule because I plan outings around it and have a pretty good idea when my kids will be well-rested and fed, so they won't be grumpy.

Getting my baby to fall asleep was a little bit of a struggle, but it became much easier as we followed the same routine every time and just pat her and talk/sing to her when she's fussy instead of picking her up. She learned to soothe herself and fall asleep on her own, so it's worth all the effort and energy.

I would also recommend the book, "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child." All babies are different as I have learned through my 3 kids. I used the Babywise method with my second and it worked like a charm, but I followed it loosely. It did NOT work at all for my 1st and 3rd children. I think the Healthy Sleep Habits book is a much better bet, but read them both and combine them.

My daughter just turned 3 months old and about two weeks ago she started sleeping for 6 hours wakes up for a feeding and will sleep about another 4-6 hours. She also will not stay swaddled anymore and sometimes wakes herself from thrashing around as well. I've let her just make noises and sometimes give her a pacifier and she can usually put herself back to sleep after 10-30 minutes of talking to herself. (Thankfully she doesn't cry otherwise I don't know if I could let her do that) I do sometimes have to pick her up and comfort her back to sleep or feed her a little more before I can put her back down. Sometimes we still wind up sleeping on the couch. I understand your frustration totally. Another suggestion I read from another mother was that she would keep her baby in the crib with out picking him/her up and feed him/her a little from a bottle which I have also tried and that works as well (not every time but sometimes). They also now sell these blankets that are specifically for swaddling and you actually pretty much velcro them which is more difficult for them to get out of and helps restrict the arm flinging so they don't wake themselves up as often. You can cut and paste the following website to check it out. Hope these suggestions help. Every child is different and it will eventually happen one way or another. Good Luck! http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=226554...
I also recommend reading this book, Healthy sleep habits, healthy child by Marc Weissbluth, M.D. It has helped me alot! The way he writes is sometimes a little narcisistic but the content is wonderful and very helpful. It was recommended to me by a friend as well.

i honestly think having him in your room is causing the disturbance more than anything he is doing per ce. kids move around and kick. whimper, make faces, etc. and when you're a new mom especially you become a light sleeper in order to hear everything/make sure baby is ok.
my suggestion is that he goes to his regular room or you won't be able to sleep through the night as long as he makes the littlest noise. just like you hear him he hears you and your husband, so you may be waking him up with your stirring, snoring, etc. if you're still nursing and he smells you in the room he will immediately think "midnight snack"! as well~ ;)
good luck, it's only a matter of time before exhaustion hits you hard and then you will become desperate. make sure you don't get to that point so you don't get easily irritated or start lashing out at wonderful hubby~ ;p

I think you will be greatly helped by the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child." Your baby may be OVERtired, and this may be making it hard for him to stay sleep.

In general, however, remember that babies go through sleep phases in the same way that they go through eating phases. They may sleep for long hours for a period of time, then start waking more often, then go back to longer hours of sleep.

Hi K.,
First if bottle feed make sure there is no med. problem, like reflex or something keeping him up and active. you might also try his own room, so he doesn't hear you and you don't hear him. Then if breast feed maybe there is something in your diet that he doesn't like, or maybe he is going through a growth spert. I have a 4 mo. old who was sleeping 8-1:30 or 2 am then untill 6am. now he is up at 10pm and 1:30 and 4:30. He is breast feed, so i will try a bottle at night and see what happens. my 3yr old gets up now too only not at the same time, an hour before or after he does. so there is no sleeping in this house:( how did our mothers do it with 4-7 kids in the house?

I had my son sleeping through the night at about 2.5 months. Before he was born, I had heard about Babywise from a lot of mothers who said their children starting sleeping through the night between 6-10 weeks. Babywise is really about routine and PDF (parent directed feeding). The book says you should start establishing the routine around 3 or 4 weeks. Before this time, I would feed him when he wanted to eat. I would get my son up at the same time every morning and feed him at 3 hour intervals, for example 8, 11, 2, 5, 8. In the beginning, I would put him to bed after the 8pm feeding as I didn't want to stay up til 11pm and let him sleep as long as he wanted to. He starting sleeping until about 3am for a middle of the night feeding and then would go back to sleep sometimes waking again about 5am or 7am then I decided to adjust his schedule again to start at 7am. The routine is about feeding, waketime and naptime. You must follow this routine in that order to have your baby sleeping through the night. Once I switched to the 7am schedule, his last feeding was at 10pm and he would sleep through the night usually with a few peeps, but no feeding. The book says that once you start waking your child from naps, you can extend your feeding schedule, so at 4 months I extended to a 3.5 schedule, still starting at 7am with last feeding at 9pm. I feed him 5x a day and he is growing just fine. This routine helps me to plan better around his feeding times. I can go do errands, clean the house, etc and not have to constantly give him the breast when he wants a snack. I did find early on that he would fall asleep better when we did errands, but now he falls asleep on his own in his crib. I moved him out of our room at 6wks.

I just took my son out of the swaddle. This helped him sleep so well because he did like to wave his arms and legs around and I feared he would never settle down. He too would break out of mine, but my husband was an awesome swaddler. I decided it was time to break him out at 5mo and just use one of those sleep sacks so he would have a blanket in the winter. The first day I tried he took his naps just fine. The first night of sleeping he was up every couple hours, but after that maybe just a few peeps here and there. I will say he does not go right to sleep like he did swaddled, it takes a little bit longer for him to settle down.

I have read in all my books that the family bed is not a good idea. He needs to get use to sleeping on his own and putting himself to sleep in a familiar place.

I love having a routine. He is so happy all of the time, except when it nears naptime I know to put him down. A lot of other babies I know who are not sleeping seem to be fed when they want to eat and don't have a routine established. Something to think about.

There's a great book that helped me so much with my 2 kids. It's called "Good Night, Sleep Tight," by Kim West. I found a cheap used copy on Amazon.com. It teaches you about the science of sleep and gives you great strategies to teach your kids to sleep in a way that's gentle to you and the baby.

Good luck!
J.

Don't swaddle him-he doesn't like it. I learned that the hard way with my 2nd daughter - she did not like to be confined. Now my 3rd daughter - who is almost 3 months, I stopped swaddling her about a week after she came home. She is a constant mover too-even during the day. Make sure he is not gassy-try using the anti-gas drops or gripe water if he is.
My almost 3mth old sleeps 5-6 hrs after I put her down at night (we have a bedtime routine)and then after I breastfeed her when she wakes up she sleeps another 3-5hrs. She started doing this at 2 months.
I use the Johnson&Johnson lavender bath products. It has worked great for her. I even go as far sometimes and wash myself with a vanilla&lavender body wash (I take a shower at night too).
Just make sure you try to make it around the same time every night. Babies do better with a routine, I have found. This being my 3rd child made me learn every child is different and you have to find out what works for them but bath time at night has always worked out really well.

hi my name is D. ....
all three of my kids were two months old when they started sleeping through the night.... my first daughter i had to wrap tight in a blanket for her to stay asleep. and my last one i had to do the same thing.... have you tried his own room that worked better for all my kids thats when they sleep through the night better .. i have a 6 month old on the 24th and he has slept all night in his own room with my daughters since he was two months old and he does great sleeep from 9 to 10 pm until 530 to 6 am.... need to talk anymore just let me know or you can email me at ____@____.com or ____@____.com

good luck, D.

My son is 2 months and he will go down at 10 till anywhere from 4 to 6 but I have to keep him swaddled but a blanket he will break out of. At target or babies r us they have a thing that you put them in and it stays alot better swaddle thing sorry I cant think of the name but it's 9 dollars or so but the best 9 dollars spent if he isnt in that he wakes up every hour breaking out of a blanket I love it sorry I am not much help with the name of it

I used, "Babywise" with both. The first slept through the night at 11 weeks, the second at 9 weeks. It's not for everyone, though.

I've also heard good things about, "The No-Cry Sleep Solution," that someone else suggested here.

Good luck, I'll wish you a good night's sleep soon:)
T

It sounds like you love being a mom! Getting amble sleep is critical to your health. All 3 of our children slept through the night by 10-12 weeks. Babies are not born with the ability to sleep through the night. It is one of the most important jobs of a new parent to teach their children how to sleep & how to comfort themselves. At 4 months, there is no reason your son needs to be in the same room with you - you will hear every sound he makes & not sleep at all! Start with teaching him how to get himself to sleep. Make sure he's fed, & clean, then tell him goodnight & lay him down. Start by letting him cry for 10 minutes, go in & check on him, make sure he's dry & calm him down, then put him back in his crib. Work your way up to 15 min. The first day or so will be very hard, but children learn very quickly!

Waking up 3 time a night!?! Don't pick him up at the first sound he makes - by letting him be, you're teaching him to calm himself down & go back to sleep. If he;s still crying after 15 minutes, go in his room, check on him, change his diaper & put him back to bed. After several times, if he still won't go to sleep, then offer him a bottle/breast.

There is a wonderful series called Growing Kids God's Way &/or Babywise by Gary Ezzo. This series has books for each stage of our children's life. Check out their website...
www.gfi.org

Good luck! I'd love to talk to you if you need more ideas!

My daughter was 4 months old when I went back to work and I had to get up very early, like you do. I would give her the evening bottle, play with her and read to her for about an hour and then just lay her in her crib. She go right to sleep. If she cried, I'd time her because I didn't want her to cry for more than 5 minutes and guess what; she was quiet after a minute or two. Your son definately needs to be in his own room and possibly even in a crib. My son was bigger and didn't sleep well in a small space. He would move his arms and legs and bump into the sides. It would wake him up. Also, being in the same room as you, they hear every noise you make and vise versa. You'll both sleep better if he is in another room and you have a monitor with the volume low. This is the perfect age to start a good bedtime routine that you'll be able to follow and be very happy with when he is older. I used this with both of my children and it's been wonderful. When my children moved from the crib to a bed, I didn't have any of the getting out, crying, throwing fits, or any other troubles other parents have. They are 7 and 11 now and we still read and pray before bed.

I just saw you respond to my similar request! :) I'm going to try the "No Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley again. I feel like it will really work, but I wanted to get some other ideas. Also, your child is young enough that maybe you can avoid the 7 month catastrophe we have going on our house at night! I want to do anything that doesn't leave him crying for long periods of time. Good luck and keep me updated if you hear anything great.

Hi K.- I am a mom of 2 daughters, ages 5 and 3 but I remember that stage of sleepless nights all too well!! It is definately a difficult time. The best advise that I can give you from personal experience is to move him out of your bedroom. If you have an extra bedroom for him to sleep in or at least another part of the house, it is better for both of you. get a good baby monitor and adjust the volume so that you can definately hear him if he wakes up and cries, but you won't hear every move he makes. Alot of the kicking and movement that you describe sounds like normal movement that occurs during his sleep cycles. What always happened with me when I had my girls in the room with us, is that they would move around and start kicking, or even cry a little bit, but they were actually still asleep. I would wake up and would then cause the baby to wake up out of a sleep cycle. I read that over time, this de-programs their natural sleep patterns and does not allow for normal sleep for them. Another good thing about moving them to another room and using a monitor, is that if they do wake up on their own and aren't crying, they will learn to fall back to sleep on their own, which is another important sleep skill.

I know my instinct as a mother was to want to keep my little babies very close to me at night so that I could protect and monitor them, but what actually ended up happening with my older daughter is that neither of us slept well for over a year. It took alot of work and nights of letting her cry it out to get her to learn to sleep again. With my second, i moved her to her own room after 2 weeks and that helped tremendously. They are both good sleepers now, but it was a long road getting there with my first. Hope this helps! Feel free to respond back if you have more questions.

It sounds like you are a super responsive mom. I was too. i agree with the advice to put the baby in their own room... that way his midnight movements won't wake you up. Wait until he his really crying before you go to him. He just might fall asleep on his own and surprise you! My favorite book was the Baby Whisperer... although I like the Sleep Solution by Paley too. Babywise was a bit too rigid for my liking. Good luck!

K.,
My son is almost 11 weeks old and it wasn't until I put him in his own room and crib that he started sleeping for 5-6 hour stretches at night. I also have background "white" noise in his room. Like your son, mine would also break himself out of his swaddle and a friend of mine suggested a special swaddle blanket with velcro fasteners. I first swaddle him with a regular swaddle blanket and then I put him in his swaddler w/ velcro over that. He sleeps so soundly and although he still will sometimes break himself out, he is usually pretty secure. I hope this helps. Oh, I also cluster feed him towards the end of the evening, like every hour and a half until bedtime.

Read "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Marc Weissbluth. I read it when my son was 4 months old and I should have read it sooner! It is great!

K.
www.babybootcamp.com

I would read the No cry sleep solution by elizabeth pantly. It has awesome tips and is a great resource. Dr. Sear's sleep book is great too! Every child is different about when the sleep through the night. My son has on and off, but not until maybe eight months or so. Can you put him in your bed on his tummy, so that you can monitor breathing, etc.... Just make sure you have a firmer mattress. You could also try him on his back with a sleep positioner, or in your bed in a cuddle box thing. Good luck!

Hi K.,

My daughter is four and a half months and she has been sleeping through the night since six weeks. Prior to that she was up every three hours. Her problem was that she had her days and nights mixed up before then. When she was born we were living in a one-bedroom apartment with my mother and mother-in law taking turns watching us because I also had a four year old. Once we were able to move to our new house in AZ and she had her own room she slept through the night like a champ. She has a different place to sleep for naps during the day which seems to help. If she is congested, she sleeps in her car seat instead of the crib. The trick for us is keeping her on schedule. She has her last bottle at 10pm (6oz) and then her next bottle is usually at 8:30 or 9am the next day. My son was totally different. He was a fussier eater, never had a true schedule because he was bouncing between me and the sitter, and his room had the tendency to be really cold (we lived in WI in an old drafty house...) He was also in our room for about a week, we couldn't stand it so he had to move out and we only went in if he was truly hungry or lost his pacifier.

Good luck!

K.,

I am sorting through a similar situation right now.

My 6 month old was waking every 2 hours. Still!

I brought up my concern at her last visit to the doctor two weeks ago. The doctor reprimanded me for going in every time she cried. He asked me if I wanted to wear these handcuffs for the rest of my life.

Well, I listened to his advice (to only go to her when my breasts were throbbing and I needed her to eat.) Two weeks later she sleeps 6 hours at a time. She will still wake occasionally when she needs to burp again or if she is uncomfortable, but now she wakes just once every night for feeding.

The times that she wakes because she is uncomfortable she usually fusses for a few minutes and falls back to sleep.

This miracle was hard to come by though. The first night of changing her pattern was excruciating. I sobbed in my bed while I listened to her wail in hers. My husband held me for a few minutes and then he went to get her and brought her to me. It s not easy to listen and do nothing, but I knew I had created the habit and that she just wanted me close. She does the same thing during the day, still. She won’t let me be more than 3 feet away before she screams. I just bought a Lil' Play Zone gate to confine her to a safe area with toys while I get her used to the fact that she is capable of being on her own while I pee or eat!!!

I hope my experience can help you make the best decision for your family. One thing I will say is that I am more capable of being patient and calm with her during the daytime screaming now that I get more and solid sleep.