Help Getting 14 Month Old to Sleep by Himself

Dear C.,

I understand! My daughter who is now 5 and 1/2 had horrible Reflux ans YES we'd rock her to sleep every night and she has slept well ever since! We also used the book, "The No Cry Sleep Solution" and I am happy to report that to this day, she have NEVER cried herself to sleep! Just think of how you feel if you have ever cried yourself to sleep: how your sleep is not sound, your brain aches, your eyes swell, etc...I would say to go back to Rocking(it's fine) but once he closes his eyes, it to bed gently, nap time too(if he wakes walk in put your hand on his back to show you are there and then walk out). Also try to keep room as dark as possible: nap and bed times, soothe it with a white noise machine or a air purifier. We Rocked Claire to sleep until she was 18 months and then one nite-she pointed to her crib and that was the end of rocking...she has gone to sleep freely since. Hope my words help. Also is he on any meds for the Reflux? She was on Zantac liquid and started onm it at 4 months old, we stopped using by age 2, I think. Bes to you! We also elevated the head of her crib just a bit(wedge was too angled) by putting Dr Seuss books of similar height under each leg(just by head) to have it at a slight angle and ease the reflux flair up!

G.

Is crying endlessly safe? Yes. Is it advisable? It depends on who you ask. Should you do it? Only you can decide that. Personally, I can hardly stand letting my kids cry 10 minutes to see if they will go back to sleep on their own. I have never let them cry endlessly and they are great sleepers. I think I have taught them that if they need me, I will be there for them. Cry-it-out advocates would say I spoil them and that they have learned that they can get what they want whenever they want. But the fact that they go to sleep on their own and sleep 11-12 hours at night proves that my way works just fine and no one can argue that going to them when they cry is the more compassionate way to handle it.

I suggest getting the "No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers". When it comes down to it, I have never heard of a school-aged child needing to be rocked to sleep, so you know there is an end coming. You have to decide what works for you because your child will probably get through it with or without your help. Can you sit there listening to him scream because he wants his mommy for an hour? I can't. But it works for some.

I am curious about the same thing.

I don't think you would be a "horrible" parent if you rocked him to sleep. But we let our daughters sleep with us for almost the full first year. They are both sleeping in their own cribs for naps and bedtime now and having too problems with it (between 14 to 15 months old). With our 1st daughter, we literally set up a little floor bed for one of us and if she'd wake up, we'd go into the room to let her know we were there and she was safe. Then one of us would lay on the floor right next to her crib with our hand in the crib until she fell back to sleep or until we did. :) then we would "sneak" out of the room. That is what worked for us and our girls. We also play a relaxing/soothing CD for them (the girls love Enya). They hear the music and now say it is night-night time. Create some sort of nap/bedtime routine. whether it is a bath, story time, rocking, etc.
Also, he might be cutting his molars if he hasn't yet. This is about the age my daughters did. My youngest is 15 months old. This was very painful for our daughters and they were definitely more clingy during this time.
Good luck!

There's definitely nothing wrong with still rocking him to sleep at this age - you could try reading to him while you rock him as well (good transition for later when you want to just read bedtime stories).

I'd suggest trying to stay in the room with him - and try to get him to go back to sleep in the crib with you in the room. Music is good or if you've established a "reading" routine, I found that I could even read to my one daughter while she was in the crib and she would settle down and go to sleep. I've done the lying on the floor and then sneaking out thing too, it does work, and eventually as they get older you can move further out of the room until they don't need you there at all anymore.

You are not terrible for trying the cry it out method either, but usually within a few days, the crying dwindles. (I did it with my oldest, fortunately, didn't have to with my middle child, and so far haven't needed to with my youngest.) If he's still that resistant, I think you are going to need to explore other methods though. I'd go back to rocking him for a bit - not necessarily holding him for the rest of the nap. Rock him until he's asleep and try putting him back down. Once he's doing a bit better, you might even be able to just rub his back while he's in the crib to get him to go back to sleep (that works with my son sometimes - he's 15 months). Good luck.