Help!!!!!!!!!!

My almost two year old is in a crib with a tent which eliminates the problem completely. I love the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" which lays out a systematic way to correct sleep problems. You need sleep!
Good luck.

:( my kiddo did this (sorda)...but I had a door knob guard so he couldn't leave his room -- but he was getting out of bed and sleeping on the rug in the bathroom??? I think the key is to be consistent... let him know that he can't get away with it, where he is supposed to sleep, etc. the one time you cave... he knows it'll work and he'll just keep doing it until you do.. I have a feeling you'll have some sleepless nights and cranky days ahead but consistency is key...

Just keep swimming... just keep swimming (like Dory says in Nemo) :)

My little sister did this, and our pedi told my mom to make a pallet on the floor next to the bed and let her sleep there, so she did and a week or so into that, (sleeping on the floor), my little sis, slept in her own bed

Good luck

my son who is 20 m also, discovered how to open his bedroom door. we have the lever handles, and first he was happy proud and then the game began and a nightmare for me. After night two and two bad mornings. i bought the round handles, he cried the first night realizing he couldnt get out. but after that night, its been a blizz again. I need my time at night. I know soon enough he will master those round knobs and thats when I will buy those plastic covers for the handles. I know uve seen them before, next to plug covers, its a common pracitice. Not cruel, just safety for them and my sanity.
Wish u well

This may not be the most popular idea, but in order to get some sleep for everybody, my husband and I moved our bed into our little daughter's bedroom, so that we all shared the same room. She was very good about staying in her bed after that, and we were able to sleep. Our bedroom still housed our clothing and stuff, just not our bed. LOL! You probably think I'm insane, but the same child is now twelve and a very happy, sweet girl who has no problem sleeping in her own bed, in her own room.

We put little door dealies on our sons doors so he can't get out of his room. He kept doing the same thing, but once we put the round door knob things, he had to stay in his room. It sounds kind of harsh, but with another baby in the house, I had to have some sleep. Also, when I would hear him getting out of his bed, I would very lovingly put him back in his bed and tell him to stay in bed. Consistent scheduling, I think is also very important. Hope this helps.

My son decided to wake up all night long and go sleep on the couch every night - he is 2 1/2 - and make me sleep with him. I have no idea where he got the idea...except that we all hang out on it sometimes! At first I let him stay there until he went to sleep then I took him back to bed. Then, he knew and would not let me take him to bed at all. I was so tired! I realized I had to just make him see I was not going to do that. I HATE to have my babies cry at all, but you have to sometimes. He would go out there, call for me, and I would either not go or go pat him and go directly back to bed. Took about three nights for him (he gives in easily) to realize it wasn't worth it. Last night, one month later and out of nowhere, he woke up and wanted me to come to the couch with him. I said no and he stood in the hall and cried (scary because he has a twin sister I didn't want awakened and she didn't) and eventually just came to me and I hugged him and consoled him and took him to bed. He went to sleep.

So, it is normal for our little ones to come up with their own plan. :) Next, you just have to make a plan of how to combat it lovingly and he will get the point. I think it can take up to two weeks. But, that is much less time than sleeping with your son until he is 10! It happens though because you don't realize it until it's done. So, cut it off at the pass. If you need brainstorming ideas of what to do or how, email me.
S. d

My best advise on this would be to watch that show "The Nanny". Her technique on bedtime worked for me. You have to continue putting the child back in bed, with no talking or eye contact, no matter how many times it takes. It is really hard that first night, but each night after gets shorter and easier. If he is scared, give him a cool flashlight that he can use to go potty or to look around to make sure the monsters are all gone, etc. If you lock your bedroom door it makes them knock & that is much more discouraging for them to sneak out of bed after a few trips to your door. Good luck!

Hi A.-
People all over the world sleep together- all ages. In most of the world, crowded living conditions mandate this, but even in less crowded cultures it still seems to be more the norm than our American way.
I remember a Japanese friend asking me why Americans don't want their children to sleep with them.
Perhaps your son is in touch with ancient human instincts- good for the survival of a little one historically, yes? ...to not be separated from the caregivers?
I have 3 children ranging in age from 11 to 21. I can laughingly say that it is guaranteed that they won't want to sleep with you when they reach puberty. One thing that worked well for us was a small bed in our bedroom.
Personally I always enjoyed having mine close, especially when they were a little sick, or had bad dreams or anything else that needed mild attention during the night. I think my instincts make me feel safer with them near me at night too...that way no wild animals, fires, etc. can slip up on them.

Well this is coming from someone on the other side of this problem. This sounds just like me when I was a young girl.
My mom would have to lay down with me until I fell asleep and then when I would wake up without her I would yell for her to come back in. I'm a bit ashamed to say but this lasted for a very long time. I would suggest doing anything but laying with him on a regular basis. It creates a habit and it's best if a child learns the skill of falling asleep on their own. I had to learn when I was much older. First with the light on and then with the TV on etc.....It was a hard and drawn out process. I think that you should validate the feelings that he is having and let him now that you understand them. I also suggest that you be honest and not use monster spray and all that stuff. Let him know that you are close and checking in on him. I use the same bed routine every night (bath, book time, a song and a prayer) and I also keep the door wide open when I leave and sometimes I put on a soft cd for him to hear.
I think children just want to know that that are safe when they are sleeping. I liked the suggestion of putting the mattress on the floor next to the bed if he refuses to stay in his room. At least he's not laying with you and it's kind of a "middle" ground for now.
Hope you get some good sleep soon.
C. :)

When I had this issue with my daughter, I got her dr. involved. I slipped him a note and he explained to her that she needed to sleep in her own bed and that she couldn't come into our bed anymore. So as we transitioned to her being in her bed, we put out a blanket and pillow on the floor. If she crawled into the bed, we would remind her that Dr. Barry said that she couldn't sleep here but she could be near us on the blanket. After a few weeks she stopped coming into our room and began sleeping all night in her own bed. Mom's that get more sleep are happier Moms. Good luck.

This just happens at that age - my son did it, all my nieces and nephews did it. It's not an issue as far as development goes. It took my son about two weeks to get over it, but you have to know that you're going to lose a lot of sleep in that time. Stick to your guns, though - he HAS to stay in his bed. Soon enough he'll grow out of this, too.

Have you tried getting a twin air mattress and laying it on the floor next to your bed? This might get him used to sleeping apart while still near and then you can slowly transition him into his own room.

Hi A.-

Forgive the copy and paste, but I'd written this to someone with a very similar situation. You are in a great starting place for this routine... best of luck!

Whoa! That's tough! And I sure have been there. One idea:

Develop your own particular bedtime routine. The importance of routines in general for a toddler can not be over-emphasized. For some help with that (and reinforcement) look into books that involve Walfdrof education, Rudolf Steiner, and the like. Your Are Your Child's First Teacher is a must have book in my opinion, really.

Back to your nightime terror.

Run through the routine: wash hands, put on pajamas, brush teeth, read a book, sing a song, etc. What ever works for your family, but make it real specific and make sure you don't skip steps, ever. When it comes time for the actual putting to bed my suggestion is this: have a comfortable chair in the room with your child. You give a quick hug, and a bear to your child, then go and sit in the chair with a low light and begin to read (your book) to yourself. She will most likely come out of the bed on you. Don't speak to her, just put her back with one word: bedtime. Repeat over and over (and over) until she tires out and falls asleep, then you go and get some rest. The idea is not to reward her getting out of bed with comforting and hugs and all (there's a time for that in the daytime routine, just like there's a time for everything). You simply reinforce the 'it's bedtime' message by saying that one word and not giving her one more iota of attention past putting her in her bed. She'll scream and holler, but you'll know she's not physically hurt- you're there to ensure that. She's just reacting to your persistance, which she will eventually learn lasts longer than she does. That gives her something to count on, and children are looking for boundaries. Let her find the boundary, you don't have to punish her, just let her know the boundary doesn't move based on mood, emotion, holidays, or anyother factors. The routine is the routine, blame that when you are challenged by her.

"It's not time for cookies, silly." "It's time to wash up for dinner." "It's playtime!" "It's time to draw while Mommy makes dinner." Write the routine down somewhere and post it, then work that baby like it were law. The children will flourish, I promise.

This will take time. Be patient and do not give up! You will eventually teach her that bedtime means it's time to sleep. And that it's not a threatening activity or one where she'll be left alone to manage in the darkenss.

The best thing I can tell you about the whole thing is that it's a 'trend-thing'. It won't happen overnight, but slowly as part of a learning process. That's why having patience is so critical. And patience is hard to come by when you're stressed out and over-tired, believe me I know.

Comfort yourself by knowing that each child is different, and odds are the if/when you do have another, that child probably won't have the same issue. My first child was just like yours, and my second (born 2.5 years later) actually was instrumental in helping my older one go to bed at night, and to this day they share a room.

Deep breathing, pressing your hands at pressure points, anything you can do for yourself to maintain during those first few hard nights on the new routine is recommended. Just go real deep and find the patience to continue, and you will succeed. And then you will be soooo happy, and so will your family!

Best of luck! I hope this helps.

My daughter did the same thing. I tried I don't know how many nights to get her back to her bed. Was not working. I finally took her trundle mattress and put it in our room on the floor next to us. She would sleep there. After a few nights, I asked her what was wrong with her room. She said monsters. We did a search, at night, with a flash light looking throughout her room for monsters. Then I said that monsters like fruit. Let's leave them some and if it is gone in the morning, then we would look again. If the fruit was still there, they had already left. She saw the fruit still there and was good to go. Every once in a while, she'll want to sleep in our room. I'll do it but it doesn't last forever. I think it is just something going on that they can't pin down what it is. As long as it's not an every night habit, I think every once in a while is okay for them to feel secure.

I completely understand! My son who will be 3 in two weeks has been doing this for almost a month. DH stayed home with him tonight while I met some ladies from Church to buy gifts for our Angel tree kids. When I got home, almost 10pm, DH and DS were in my bed - both awake. I tried singing to my DS which usually puts him right to sleep but he fought it. Finally I took him back to his room, which he has avoided for almost two weeks now, and within 10 minutes he was asleep in his bed and I'm happily typing this from my bed. :-)

My son is doing the same thing and he just turned two beginning of November. I think it is separation anxiety. Last night he wanted milk (at 1:00 am.) I gave it to him. I have let him sleep with me on occasion as well. Although, I think we is now expecting that response.

I suggest going in there when he first wakes up and rock and console him. Once you know nothings wrong, put him down. He will scream...you have to let him scream. You maybe looking at a few hellish nights...but it has to end unless you want a bed buddy other than your husband.