Having a 3Rd Baby in Your Late 30'S...

I can't tell you what you should do, but can give you some insight.

I have 4 kids:
The oldest will be 9 this month. I was 27 when I had him.
The next is 5 (3.5 years from #1). I was 31 when I had him.
The next is 3 (22 months from #2). I was barely 33 when I had her.
The last is 4 months (3 years from #3). I was 36 when I had him.

I can tell you that my body is tired. My pregnancy (8# 12oz homebirth) was a breeze at 27 and I still did really well with the 4th pregnancy (11# homebirth), but it doesn't get any easier. I got pregnant with #1 early in our marriage and wasn't ready. Then, I used progesterone cream with #2 to get pregnant, since nothing was happening. #3 was sort of planned. #4 - I got pregnant the day after my period ended. Go figure.

Don't stress over it. You will know. It appears that you are faithful, so pray about it and you'll know when the time is right. I wanted my kids 22 months apart....but when we got there with getting pregnant with #2, I was not ready for a LONG time. Then we got pregnant, unexpectedly with #3 and she was 22 months from the last one. Everything happens the way it should.

I tell moms that 18 is the perfect physical age to have a baby and 45 is the perfect emotional age...so somewhere in between is probably a good balance. LOL

Breathe. Trust. Enjoy your newborn.

And, what does your husband want?

I was 39 yrs old with baby #2 and 41.2 with baby #3...had easy pregnancies, but now at 50 I do feel like the grandma at school, but I also have very well behaved and smart kids and I attribute that to my ripe ol'age b/c I don't stress about being a perfect parent anymore...I just love them for who they are. I think that comes with age.

With all 6 of mine, I never could get pregnant while nursing. It's how my body works. If I were you, I would forego any birth control and hope for a pregnancy. I had my 6th at age 39. I miscarried last year, and have just started bleeding in this pregnancy. We have no guarantees of pregnancy on our own terms. I choose to trust the Lord for children. I pray that his one lives, but I am once again reminded that it is not in my hands. By the way, I'm 44.

I am 39.5. We had unprotected sex last week. I hope I am pregnant. It will be our third. We will stop after this.

Please do use birth control. Please do space out your 2nd and 3rd, unless you have a mommy's helper around. 2 kids will exhausted you. Yes, I would wait. In fact, I did wait. My second will be 2 in Dec. There is 21 months between my first two, as I was worried about my age. Now? I'm not so worried. I'm tired, and I wanted to make sure I had time for my second child. He deserves some quality mommy time before I have another baby to take care of. You have a newborn to take care of. Worry about your newborn, use birth control, and revisit this issue in 8-10 months.

I too have to stop nursing to ovulate. But I wouldn't worry about the age thing, all the research is so out of date that it should be ignored. Seriously, I went looking, it was all from the early 90s. Just think about how many more woman are having babies in their late 30s, early 40s nowadays.

I don't know if this is an answer to your question or not, but I would wait a year. Personally I think there is something to letting your babies be babies for a while, before you throw another sibling in the mix. That being said, I can completely understand why you would feel the pressure to go for having another baby ASAP. If you feel ready, and are ready to stop nursing, then go for it, but personally I would wait a year, if for nothing else, to give your body that time to recover from carrying a baby and to be the healthiest you can be. Best wishes and congrats on the little one!

I conceived and had my son when I was 37.... and will tell you this.. just because you might another baby , of course this doesn't mean nature will give you another baby.., therefore, my advice.. don't wait on it.. that said.. having a baby at 37 has been a dream....... I have so much more patience than some of my younger mom friends.. they fret over some of the most minor things. additionally, lose their patience with their children more readily., while I savor the moments..... this even includes the not so good moments.. which to me, there really aren't any bad moments. As an older mom , I think you come to truly understand, life goes by so quickly and children grow up so very fast..... bottomline, if you wait, you banking on the idea that all will goes as planned. granted, you cannot control fate.. however, If whatever hand you do have in it means anything, then I would try as soon as you can.... just being honest and to the point as I see it..

good luck to you

If I were you I would wait 18 months before getting pregnant again as studies have shown that, medically, that is the safest for both mother and baby. But, if your doctor give you the go ahead and you know you can handle having multiple very young children, go for it.

Well I don't know what a doctor would tell you but me personally I would say have another one. I'm sorry I'm probably not helping your situation but I love kids. I'm 31 and have 3 kids and I want just one more. I had a C-Section with my last one so that is the only reason why I am going to wait. I think at least until he is 4 then like you said if the Man Upstairs agrees with me on having another then so be it and if not, that's fine too. I love the idea of a big family. So as long as your healthy and no life threatening problems with your other births, I don't see the problem. Good Luck and God bless you and your family. Take care! O yes and I forgot to mention that my first two daughters are exactly 11 months apart. My first was born on 8-8-05 and the second was born on 7-8-06. And my son is turning 11 months on Wednesday the 5th.

I think every woman is different. Our bodies. I had my first, then when she was about 5 months old,found out we were expecting again. So both of my girls are 14 months apart. (And had 2 c-sections with each of them) And had no problems expect high blood pressure with both pregnacies. And had my 3rd child when my second daughter was about 2 and my oldest was 3. But after my last child I was told to wait at least 3 years b/c I had 3-sections to close and to give my body time to heal. But I think God has more control.(Thats just me.) But I would ask the dr. first.

I want another one but i'm waiting til next year and see how things will go from there.

Another Note: my mom was about 39 almost 40 when she had my half brother and had no problems with him. But she did get fixed after him and she said he is her little blessing. :)

I know you feel your biological clock is ticking, but please don't let it rush you into poor decision-making. Research is very clear that there are increased risks for baby AND mom when children are conceived too closely together. Here's some of the latest research:
Increased risk of serious pregnancy complications: http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/family-planning/MY01691
Increased risk of autism: http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2011/jan/9/close-birt...

Personal experience of having a 3 yr gap between 1st and 2nd (my body had time to recover and I was excited to have #2) and 20 month space between #2 and #3 (due to contraception failure) has taught me a lot. Having the last 2 so close was really hard on my body. I love my 3rd so much, but if I'd had a choice, I'd rather take the risk of advanced maternal age and waited at least 18 months before trying to conceive him. We had 2 kids under 2 that did not sleep through the night for months. Talk about tired and stressed.
PLEASE use contraception until you are ready for another child both physically and mentally. Breastfeeding is not a reliable form of contraception after 6 months and rules must be followed 100% to keep it reliable before baby reaches 6 months of age. Best wishes on wise family planning. Nurse Midwife Mom of 3

of course, its ultimately what feels right for you and your husband but my two cents is to go for #3 while you can or at least think you can. i got pregnant at 37 and had our daughter at 38. i'm now 41 and have been trying for #2 since she was 9 months old. i've done it all...all the infertility and have never gotten pregnant again. i refuse to give up. we want another child SO BADLY. i waited 9 months to try b/c i had a c-section and was told to wait from my OB/GYN...i wish i hadn't.

it might be tough for a couple of years but nothing you can't handle...good luck!

Where to start?! :) First, if you want more kids, GO FOR IT!!

My aunt was 39 when she had her first, and 41 when she had her second. She got married when she was 37. My SIL had her first when she was 39 1/2 with her first and I'm pretty sure she's currently trying for a 2nd and she's 41 1/2 right now. Yes, it's tougher as you get older and the risk factors increase, but there are more than plenty of successful pregnancies with healthy children to show for it.

My sister just had her first earlier this year (she's 36 yrs old)...and when the baby was 6 months old she got pregnant again! (not on purpose, but she's not about the question the Big Man Upstairs's choices :) hahaha! and her cycle was nowhere near anything called "normal" at that point, so there's definitely some questions as to how far along she really is since she'd just had a baby and was still breastfeeding) She was and still is breastfeeding her now-8-month old baby and will continue to for as long as it's not adversely affecting either the new baby growth or the current one...she'll likely stop when the current baby is 1 and then 2-ish months later, start up again with the new baby.

After my first, I went a full year before getting my period back. With my second, it was about 3 months even though I was exclusively breast-feeding both times. Each pregnancy is different and each one affects you differently.

First: enjoy the baby you just had! Give you body a good chance to recover from this one so that it can do what it needs to do to be ready to prep for another one.
Second: when/if you feel like it's right, go for it! Even if your new baby is 1 before you get another period, you'll still have plenty of time to work on adding to your family. If you and your husband feel good about further additions, whatever your age, you'll sure have fun trying!

Good luck!