Has Becoming a Mom Made You Braver?

I am more aware of 1,000 things that are terrifying, so a lot of smaller things don't bother me as much. My fear got an upgrade, of sorts.

I tell my son that in order to be brave, you have to be scared.

After all... if something is just fun/ or normal/ or not scary... then it's fun, normal, not scary at all. You just do it. But if it IS scary, and you do the right thing anyway... that takes courage.

So, yah, I've become a LOT braver since being a mom... because soooooo many things that didn't used to be scary are! And I still have to do them!

This is such and interesting question... I don't know about braver, but being a mom pushes me to be a better person for sure. I feel like parenting is called "parenting" because so much of raising kids brings out our own strengths and weaknesses, and making good choices about the examples I set for my kids forces me to deal with my own stuff. There's just so much to teach your kids by everyday interactions and situations.

I find myself more patient and kinder to others and harder on myself.

Dealing with bugs has never bothered me, but I am surprised sometimes of the automatic responses that motherhood brings out... like when your kid is about to throw up and we automatically cup our hands in front of their mouth as we hurry them to the bathroom. Gross... it's nothing I would do for anyone else.

I wouldn't say that it has made me braver. I would say I has made me more neurotic, not in a helicopter parent way but more of a "schedule, think/plan ahead/anticipate" sort of way.

Hi denise-

Good question...I have been 'pondering' since I read it...

For me...I think becoming a mom has made me more 'selfless' rather than brave. I, before 'motherhood' was completely focused on ME...my career...MY life...MY desires...I was willing to be more 'selfless' in my marriage...but my ex hubby was/is not...*sigh*

Post children, I have found the capacity to love UNCONDITIONALLY...and fight some fights that I never knew I had the strength to fight.

IF I am braver...it is because my kids have brought it out in me....

*still pondering*
michele/cat

Denise -
I slay spiders too...but scream a great banshee yell as I wack the hell outta them.
I have always been very vocal about things I don't agree with, so I actually think parenting has had the opposite affect on me. Or maybe it's age, not sure.
But, I have learned to ignore unpleasant people and walk away. Whereas before I would confront and let them know *why* I thought they were such jerks, now I understand some people are just jerks and they don't deserve my time. :)
So, I don't know if I am braver, but I am wiser. lol
L.

In some ways I'm more aware of fears that I never had before.
Before I had my son I never thought I'd run from O. end of the house to the other because the baby coughed and I was afraid he was choking.
I never thought after all the crying of those first 6-8 weeks when I PRAYED (often in tears myself) for the baby to sleep peacefully that when it finally happened I'd be scared to death wondering why the baby wasn't crying and is he breathing ok.
Dealing in contradictions somehow became an art-form.
It's so hard when they are helpless infants and you have to guess if they are not feeling well and they can't tell you what hurts.
Being a parent has been a growing experience for me.
I feel I know more, am more experienced, than I was in my pre-parenting days and in some ways I'm more confident.
But then I still have the teenage years to make it though and although my son's been an easy going child so far - it's like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop.
I'll just have to wait and see how it goes!

I guess brave is a good word for it. I have found that the MOST difficult part of being a mom is being a good example. Not speaking ill of people I really don't like, eating the right foods, using the cross walk, not running from bugs and not freaking out on an airplane. All of my 'flaws' are cleverly hidden now - so maybe it is being brave in situations or maybe I am just a better person now (I think I will stick with the latter)

I think I have become more of a wimp actually. People say childbirth makes you stronger too but now, I shy away from anything I know that will hurt, turn emotional or be too much effort. Or maybe I am smarter and know what is worth hurting for or not. Overall, no, I don't think I am braver. I am less tolerant and have different priorities but I do appreciate what I have more.

It changed my definition of bravery, and forced me to challenge my fears.

Definitely. Before I read your whole post I was thinking the same thing about the spiders. Dont get me wrong I still cringe and have a panic attack when I see O. but if its even remotely close to crawling on my DD I will swat that thing with my bare hand to 'save' her. LOL

No, absolutely not.

I think becoming a Mom has made me aware that there are little people way more important than me and, thusly, I have to put my feelings aside much more often than there was ever a need to before.

I am much more aware of fears that I never had a need to have before.

So no, I don't think it has made me braver- but it has made me more selfless.

yeah, i guess i am..
i gave birth to our baby in our apartment bathroom(goodbye deposit)
with only her father there to help me, when the emts showed up, i said, cut the cord and take her, i will get into the next ambulance.
in the meantime, her father is saying, dont argue with her, just do what she says.
i still dont like spiders though.
but i have gotten over my aversion to the sight of blood,at least my own
K. h.