Has Anyone Heard of PMDD or Has It?

Hi J., I really feel for you and your situation. You've already received some good advice. I just want to let you know that I have recently had a similar experience and have seen my way through it. My situation is one of wild hormonal fluctuations. Yours may be due to similar or different causes, but no less difficult to live with. There is help and there is hope. May you find both. Good luck and keep your head up.

I had PMDD too. I almost lost my marriage because of it. It's was like being a third person. I could hear and see the things that I was doing, but I couldn't control it. I was put on an anti-depressent specificially for PMDD...and it helped. But I also had endometrosis and because my uterus walls were thickening...it played with my hormones. Have you ever been told you have endometrosis...if not, talk to you OB about it. I had severe endometrosis and had a hystertomy (sp? sorry), but since I had that done and am on hormones...I don't have the reply of the earlier years. It is terrible on my family. It's also hard on you because you carry guilt for the way you lash out...my husband didn't get it either which made me even meaner to him. Looking back now, I am surprised he never left. He took a lot of BS from me...I hope this helps.

Yes. I am 46 and have had it a long time, but recently just realized it. It is PMS that is so bad that it effects all of your relationships. Talk to your gynecologist. I also started having long periods. I was a candidate for an Oblation. This is where they go in and lazor the inside lining of your uterous. You no longer have periods. My doctor would not comment that it would also help with PMDD, but it has! I am never moody anymore. I also take Effexor for depression (a low dose). I was taking the Effexor before I had the oblation and I still had PMDD, so I know the Effexor was not the thing that solved it. It was the Oblation. I feel like my old self again.

J. D.

I am sure I have PMDD and don't have a very good three weeks of the month as well. It also sounds like you might also be suffering from depression. You may want to check into that as well. I have had depression also and I feel for you. Best wishes!!

I do understand what you are going through. I have PMDD and have aboout one good week a month. Noises really bother me, i am over-sensitive and bitchy and get horrible headaches. This in addition to all of the PMS symptoms. I have recently begun taking Paxil when i begin to feel it start, but i'm not used to it so i don't think i am always catching it soon enough. We'll see how it goes next month.

You also sound depressed and resentful(maybe)that you had to move and it is making you want to lash out at your husband. I would talk to a dr. about it and be sure to tell them just how extreme the symptoms are. Finding a therapist to talk with could also help. I am doing all of these things because i have ppd and then i get the pmdd on top of it and it makes it feel so much worse.

J., You've received alot of good advise. I encourage you to find a Dr. who will DO SOMETHING to help you. Doing nothing can destroy your marriage, your family. Even if you have a patient husband and your children are able to love past your irritability, they all are suffering as much as you are. Get help. Even if it means going outside your locale for a Dr. who is knowledgable. All my life I had long and horrible periods, and now know the hormonal imbalance was dramatic, but always felt it was just my problem. Even after a hysterectomy I wasn't put on hormones or treated for the issues caused the deficiency. You have to take control and find treatment yourself. You have a wonderful source of education and encouragement here at Mamasource that we didn't have 30 odd years ago. It's most important you get help as soon as possible to neutralize the situation before your husband gives up on you and your children are emotionally hurt by your inability to be the constant loving person you want to be. May God bless you and your family.

Hi J.!

I understand what you mean. I moved here away from family and because of my husband's job. I was terribly depressed for the first year, but forced myself to get involved with other thruough my children's activities. I also took time out for myself. I indulged in my then hobby, now business, West African dance. Today, I finally feel I have a handle on myself in addition to the various duties I must perform. Hang in there Mamma! T.

You need to talk to your doctor about this. If you get the right medication, you will see a huge difference. I recomend reading the book Change Your Brain, Change Your Live. Don't beat yourself up, just get yourself to a competent doctor and you and your family will be so much happier. Good luck!

J.:

I would discuss this with your doctor. I have been diagnosed with PMDD....it's not the end of the world when you recognize it. Mine all began about the time that I got married. I had the novasure procedure done which was supposed to help with my periods, but it was determined that I have fibroids and it did not affect me the way it was intended. So, the doctor has recommended the partial hystorectomy. When I had the novasure procedure, I got off the pill, which apparently is one solution for controlling PMDD (but not so much recommended for us ladies over 35). My doctor gave me a medication called Sarafem. I don't take it all month long. My "mood" or "testiness" usually begins about 7 to 10 days prior to starting my period. And, most of the time I notice it myself. Sometimes, I don't catch myself being unreasonable but my husband will look at me and say, "It's coming...." and I know that means he has noticed it for at least a day or two. Sometimes it's hard to realize if there are other stress factors causing your anxiety or anger, or if it is really the PMDD. Anyway, I only take the meds until I feel my mood stabilize which is usually about 1/2 way through my period, and then I don't take them anymore until the next month. It is worth asking your doctor about. There is truth in "When mamma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy".....unfortunately, you don't want your small amount of time with your children to be memories of frustration..... Also, living so far out, you may find yourself not "getting out" but believe me when I say you have to plan date night. Lots of people recommend once a week, but sometimes that isn't feasable, so try once every other week, even if it's just to a movie....you need time to spend with your husband that's "adult time" whether it's just talking, walking, holding hands..... And, ask him if he will go to the doctor with you, too. This may help him understand. And, your doctor may be able to help him understand. My doctor has told me that this is common for women our age......and sometimes it gets better, sometimes it lasts until menopause....which at 39, probably won't be soon....I can't remember exactly but it seems like I remember him telling me that the average age for menopause is somewhere between 45 and 52......I can't remember exactly though.

Lexapro is what saved me!!

It sounds like two things can help. First of all, we tend to get really grumpy when we are in pain. I use a pill called Anaprox. It helps me with the cramping...I actually start taking it right before I know I am going to start. My friend Sheryl swears that it helps with her moodiness and helps her stay more balanced...it is something that your doctor can easily prescribe. The other thing that will help is for you to get some exercise. I know you probably don't have a gym and you live in TX so that leaves evenings at home. Even if it is an exercise video or playing music and jumping around with your kids, the endorphines that you will get from the exercise will help balance your moodswings too. With it this bad, I would consider going to the Doc to rule out any serious conditions of the thyroid, etc. It also doesn't help that you live in a house full of men! Good luck and we are here for you!

Oh honey,

I feel for you. You know you may want to start from the source of the problem and then move from there.

First of all a move is stressful on anyone! I do understand how you feel about moving away from your family and friends. I moved from Canada to Mexico more than 8 years ago. So let me help you a little with what helped me. I also moved to a small town in Mexico with no phone lines, telephone and no computor or t.v. And then on top of that had a new baby. Oh and did I mention that there was a fly zapper in the meat section hanging above the meat? So I understand your not having amenities in your small town. Poor dear, I feel for you.

I am not trying to compete with your pain just trying to explain that I was in a deep depression with the change of continent, missing friends and family, and having no outside contact. I was extremely depressed, and had all the symptoms that you speak of.

The problem is that it is hard to see when you are in it.

The road to recovery was making myself get some help and planning a girls trip to Vegas with some of my favorite friends. I realized that I was not a monster! I was my happy,normal self, with my friends, and came home feeling refreshed and more like the girl (I used to know!). "And hey, it does not have to be Vegas, it could be a sleep over at a friends house". You know what I mean!

You know and with a small town sometimes comes a small mentality. But I still had to force myself to find new friends and go out with them. Girls night, a chick movie, or just plan a monthly dinner in town with some of your favorite neighbors. Make yourself have fun and try to find some new friends. To have a friend you must have shared experiences and memories. To make experiences and memories you must plan events. You be the planner and make it happen.

The next step was going to a DR. and finding out I also needed to have a hysterectomy. Believe it or not, it changed my life. The anger and the rage a lot of times came from being exhausted!. I was a little anemic, and had a low iron from my very heavy periods. That has also changed my life. But never never have one unless you need it. But check into it you may have fibroids!

And lastly this is something I never did but wished I had in retrospect. Go to a Dr. in the city and see if you could be depressed! I used to think that was a cop out to say "I am on meds for depression". But hey, it happens. The brain is like an organ in the body. It needs help sometimes too. Just like a broken leg needs a cast. You may need a short term dose of pick me ups. We are not always perfect!.

In summary
1. become involved in life around you. Make it happen
2. Go to the Dr. and have a physical to rule out any other
causes which may be attributing to your unhappiness,
could be your health.
3. Also ask if there is a possibility that you may be
depressed. You may need a short term of anti depressants
4. Just remember for the sake of your family, and for you,
You have to fix the issue. We affect our family more than
we know. You can help your whole family on the road to
recovery by taking care of you first.

Best wishes in your quest. We are all just human, hang in there and I hope you find a medical practicioner with godspeed who will help you in your journey.

Deb

Dear J., Perhaps this move was not a good one for you; but, you are there, and wanted to do it to be with your husband. First and foremost, I believe you need a great doctor who will take an interest in your case and do all the testing that is necessary to determine what hormones you are low on and whatever else you physically need.

Next, you may need some counseling. I, too, live a distance from any major shops, restaurants, medical facilities, etc. ... I have been here 3 years now, and came from a big city to be here with my family. It took a while for me to find my groove, and to appreciate the beauty and joy of the country; but, I did it. I began to substitute teach in several small districts, and eventually took a full time job at one of the high schools. It became clear to me that I needed to be around people and make myself busy.

Yes, PMDD is real. Do what it takes to get back on an even keel. It might take you some time to get it together; but, you will. You are asking for help, so you have a keen desire to get to the bottom of this.

Best wishes ! You sound like a great person ! God Bless !

R.

Hello J.,
You sound depressed. Although PMS may also be playing a factor, you have had such a major adjustment with your move! To move 1500 miles away to a small town and then to feel so isolated....
Is there any way that you can take a small trip to visit some friends?? It sounds like you desperately need to do something for YOURSELF. Also, would you be willing to speak to a counselor for a few sessions?? Get some (indoor) exercise?? It might make you feel better...

OMG! I feel like I'm reading about me! I feel all these things and I, too, only have one good week a month. The rest is severe PMS. I too believe I suffer from PMDD.
I am currently looking into going to the doc to see if they can put me on YAZ. It's a birth control pill but also is supposed to treat PMDD. We'll see how it goes. If they don't recommend it, I'll have to find some other way, maybe a different medicine to treat because this PMDD is destroying my marriage and the love I have for my man and daughter. There are days where just the slightest thing, like getting paper caught on my foot sends me into a frenzy....if you find anything, PLEASE let me know. I'd be eternally grateful!

It also sounds like you may have situational depression. It's not a forever kind of thing, but your situation isnt what you want it to be. My doctor gave me cymbalta, a mild anti-depressant, that I take until the situation issues are resolved. It has been amazing! My doctor also said this is good because when you stop needing it, you can stop without all the awful side-effects often associated with anti-depressants. Best wishes for a peaceful resolution :)

Hi J.,
I have it. I realized I had it after I watched a show on Discovery Health channel a few years ago. I would experience almost the same symptoms as you except I would cry alot more. I would cry if they put onions in my burger, or if someone accidentally erased my favorite show and so forth. I use to teach school and I cried because they brought cake in for a teacher and didn't offer me any. Then of course the anger and then the guilt of being so mean would make me cry. It was terrible. I went to the gynocologist and he gave me a prescription for 20mg of what ever the medicine was called. I was to take it for 10 days prior to my menstrual cycle. I came home and googled the medicine and learned that it was nothing more than a renamed prozac. Of course it cost ten times more than prozac, so then I went to my PCP and she gave me a prescription for 20 mg of Fluoxetine, which is the generic version of prozac. It worked wonders! I became normal again. Last summer I told my doctor that I was feeling really stressed and anxious about my parents' illness, my son's learning disablility and other things going on and she changed my prescription. She lowered the dosage to 10 mg but now I take it everyday. It's amazing how much better I am at handling the stress and pressure. I'm not crying or angry all of the time. Go see your doctor. I hope my story helped.
G.