My daughter is a graduating senior. We know a lot of kids who are also graduating. So we are getting a lot of announcements. For close friends in the past, we have done as much as $100 for the graduate in a card. We can't do that for all of them. Thinking maybe $25 each. Sound okay or cheap?
We haven't sent announcements yet but don't expect gifts really. Should I send to everyone who sent to us?
The ones we gave $100 were ring bearers in our wedding when they were 7 and 8 so that is not a common amount. I like the $20.15 idea.
Most of the announcements we have gotten so far are ones where we are more friends with parents than my daughter is friends with the other student. They go to a different (local) school.
Honestly, the whole graduation announcement thing escapes me for people who also have seniors that are local. We have known each other sometimes since the kids were babies. We know they are graduating too and will see them around.
Until I came to Mamapedia I had never heard of getting graduation gifts from anyone other than one's parents. Is this really a thing? I have never given a graduation gift and I have had nine nieces and nephews graduate!
$100? Yikes.
Our tradition is that we don't give to each other's kids if they are all graduating together from the same school. I'm not talking about far-away friends - just the local ones. Otherwise it's just a straight exchange of cash - you give me $1, I give you 4 quarters. What's the point of that? Kids go to each other's parties, parties are staggered for 6 weeks or so in order for everyone to have a fairly full house.
An announcement to local families is a request for a gift. An announcement to distant relatives is half news, half gift request.
My personal choice is to give this year's kids $20.15 - kind of a silly amount but it's the graduation year of 2015. I think it makes it somewhat symbolic, and it explains the modest amount of about $20. So you could do that. Otherwise, do $25 - how in the world is that cheap? If anyone thinks so, they aren't great or classy friends.
Wow, $100? Can our kids be friends? :) Seriously though, we also had to think about this as we have a graduating senior as well. I asked my daughter kind of what the kids "expect" these days and she said that if it is an "acquaintance" then no money should change hands. If it is a "bestie" then a small amount of money (she said $20 is fine) can be given, but only if you/she attend the party. If it is a family friend (you are friends with the mom), then for sure a small gift of money is appropriate, even if you don't attend the party.
Hope this helps!
I would. Then they'll see how crazy it is!
$25 is more than acceptable for a gift (could absolutely be less for acquaintance kids). I keep separate piles of grad announcements/invitations so I know which ones either my son or daughter are invited to and which ones we are all invited to. Kids don't always give money to each other, but do cards. I give money to kids we've spent time with or know well.
And no, you don't need to send to everyone to sent to you. Sit down with your daughter and make her list of who she wants to invite (and you do). Also, for my son's I designed and had printed business card size open house invites for him to give out to his friends. I did postcard invites for everyone else.
Graduation announcements are like an invoice.
Depending on how close I am to the student depends on my gift. My neice ( very smart, motivated girl) got $500. A nephew $200 because $500 to him woukd be too extravagant. Most others are distant family or friends and I give $25-$50 sending on the relationship.
using the announcement thing is usually accompanied by an invitation for a grad party when sent to people close by. The school gives out something like 10 announcements each to the students. And Yes $25 is a perfect amount. We gave $25 to kids who's parents we were friends with. We gave more to my kids best friends the kids who grew up as much in our house as their own. And nothing to random kids that we didn't personally know but my son did. He was able to get a gift or not as he chose. There were loads of kids who came to his grad party to hang out and he went to loads of partys where no gifts were exchanged.
Please don't sweat the amounts! Since she's a senior, many families are going to be in your same bind, regarding gifts. You just can't give $100 to each of her good friends! If you can swing $25 I would think that generous since you'll have a LOT more grads you want to recognize than in any other year. Even $20 if it's all you really can manage. Do not feel obliged to give a gift of money, or anything else, to every single student who sent an announcement, either. I would give to those to whom your daughter is closest, not to every senior who is just a school acquaintance. I know that in some places and some families every announcement is expected to generate a gift, but that's just not realistic when it's your kid's senior year and the announcements are coming from all over, acquaintances as well as close friends.
Have your daughter write a personal note to each of her closest friends about what being in high school with them has meant to her (more than she'd write in a yearbook autograph). They will burn through gift money but that kind, personal note will be something they remember.
As for sending announcements yourself, you are also not obliged to send them to everyone who sent you one. I would leave that up to your daughter, really -- she should be making the list of the people to whom she wants to send announcements. Some seniors like to collect all their friends' announcements.
Announcements have unfortunately become kind of fraught with this baggage of gifts being required (in some people's minds) if you receive one -- it's a big topic right now in another forum I read, which covers our local schools. Kind of sad. Just give gifts to her friends to whom she would give gifts anyway -- the friends close enough that she would give them a birthday or holiday card or gift. And send announcements to those to whom she is close, unless her senior class really likes just collecting them for fun.
I think $25 per kid is fine.
