Getting Rid of the Pacifier - Altoona,IA

Updated on January 20, 2012
H.W. asks from Altoona, IA
15 answers

I have a 2.5 yo son who has always had a 'nini' ak pacifier. He wants to use it sometimes during the day like when he is watching his favorite show and always needed to have it in the car,as well as during nap and bedtime. On Sunday we started removal process. We have a book about being abig kid that we read a couple times each day, and the nini fairy will be visiting soon. Here is my question...Monday and Tuesday we didn't have it except for nap and bedtime, Wednesday we didn't have it for nap,but still for bedtime. Today he has only asked for it once all am and is watching his fave show right now witout asking for it. We are going to try not having it for nap again today. Our original plan was to have the nini fairy come friday night. I would like opinions on....is that to abrupt? should we practice at night without it before the fairy comes (we tried wednesday night and he cried for 1/2 hour so I gave it to him...but he doesnt suck on it when he is asleep, often it falls out of his mouth)? am i doing this the rght way or rushing it to much (I already know he should not have it at this age). Any opinions would be grea!!

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So What Happened?

We started on Sunday night, talking about the Nini Fairy (NF) and that big boys don't have nini's. We decided to leave them for the NF on Friday night! Mon - had it at nap and bedtime; Tues - started nap without it, ended up taking it and had it at bedtime; Wed - no at naptime, yes at bedtime; thurs - it broke at naptime (because he fought me and really wanted it, but I knew he didn't need it), found one for bedtime:); Fri - no at naptime, still wanted to give it to NF at bedtime so we did.

NF brought him a toolbench. We had to rock for a few nights and it took him a long tiime to fall asleep for a few nights...he didn't know what to do when he got into bed without it, so one night hetook off his pjs, then we started doing books in bed. The whole time we would remind him of what a big boy he was! He still mentions it once in a while, but not in a sad way....Mommy I big boy like daddy and don't need ninis!!

Thanks for all the advice!!! It really helped!

Featured Answers

K.L.

answers from Sacramento on

Take it away, and don't mention it again. If he asks about it, redirect his attention. He is PLENTY old enough to go without a paci.

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☆.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Opinion: He's way too old for a paci.
Plan: If u can, keep the paci on his bed at night only for a week or so....after that--GONE. Quick and painless--like you ripoff a band aid!
Good luck!

4 moms found this helpful

J.P.

answers from Lakeland on

I tried to take it slowly from my daughter, but I found that having it disappear was the only way. If your son knows it is there somewhere he will ask for it. Maybe have the nini fairy take it tonight and leave a small toy in its place. Going cold turkey on this was what worked for us, it may not work for everyone.

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S.A.

answers from Chicago on

My son is 2.5 and we just got rid of it a few weeks ago. We did it suddenly. We couldn't find any of them one night, so we told him we'd look for one, but he fell asleep without it. So my husband decided if he could sleep without it, it was time to get rid of it. It was tough 3-4 days, but we persevered. He cried at naptime for the first two days and wouldn't take a nap, but he was so tired at bedtime after not napping that he fell asleep right away. After a few days he would nap, but ask for it, and we just said we would try to find it. This went on for a week and now he never mentions it. I am so glad we did it now because our older two had them until they were each 3.5 years, and by then, they knew if we couldn't find one that we could just go to the store and get one. I remember my oldest screaming for two hours "GO TO THE STORE" Ugggghhh. Not fun. We had to do the whole nuk fairy thing. But this time, I figured just saying they were lost would be easier than trying to get a 2.5 yr old to understand what the Nuk fairy means. Just my honest opinion. Good luck!

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J.S.

answers from Columbia on

Poke a hole in the pacifier. No squish - no joy.

What, I guess the pacifier broke? Darn.

My BIL & SIL did this - worked great.

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S.L.

answers from Kansas City on

I did this with my last child who had her pacifier the longest due to me being older and more tired, but I had her throw it away herself after we talked about it. I had taken it but given in, never give in, and then I had her put it in the trash compactor and when bedtime came I just said 'You threw it away, remember?' That was the end of it. Our twin grandsons just got rid of theirs the same way as their parents told them to throw it away and they did and it's gone. No more fuss. They are on the older end too, there is no set age to get rid of them though. So I would try that. They then know they did it and it's over. The other night I had the twins overnight and in the morning they were searching for something in a drawer and found it was looking for their pacifiers I had here. They wanted to see it so I got them out and they looked at them. Wish I'd had a picture of their faces. It was like looking at a long lost friend and they said 'there's yours' to each other. Then one said he wanted it and I said no not anymore and his brother said no we're 3 now. End of event. I will save them for them for a bit until they're bigger and I will cry some day looking at them like all the other little things I save to remember. Try that way and see if it works though.

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B.B.

answers from San Antonio on

Each situation is different. Do what is right for you and your family. This is what worked for our son:

He was 2 years, 3 months, and still used it at night, but that was about it. His younger sister had never taken to one, so the ones we had in the house were just for him. I mentioned to my dad while he was visiting that I wanted him to be done with it sooner than later, and definitely before summer. The next day while my son was at daycare, my dad took them all and threw them out. My son asked for it that night at bedtime, and my dad told him he was a big boy and didn't need it any more. There was a couple minutes of questions (where they went, could we buy new ones?), and then he went to sleep. That was that - never an issue again. I think we had been making a bigger deal about it than it really was - making it harder on him. My dad simply taking them away and then telling him why was so easy.

Good luck with the route you choose!

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A.C.

answers from Cincinnati on

It's not too fast or too slow, it's the pace your child sets. I think you're doing a great job. It's not too abrupt if it works for you and for him.

P.S. I don't think 2.5 is too old for a paci at bedtime. It's a bit old to need one during the day, but my pediatrician recommended that our kids be off them by 3, so you've still got some time, should you need it.

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J.C.

answers from Casper on

We just went through this with our 18 month old. We couldn't find it on Monday night and I didn't have an extra. I decided that we would go cold turkey as I didn't want to go buy another (not to mention didn't have the money). So it was gone. I was afraid that he would find it on Tuesday and then we would have to start over....but I found it first and kept it hidden. He has had a few rough spots, but I feel like he is doing well. On the positive note, I have noticed that he is starting to use his words more because he isn't always sucking on the binki. I had a friend who put her daughter's binkis on a helium balloon, tied a poem that said that they were going to the babies in heaven who needed them more and they said goodbye and let the balloons go. We have always gone cold turkey and just toughed it out. But I think that the key is that once you decide that enough is enough and take it away Do not cave and give it back.
J.--SAHM of 7

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

He should have it as long as he needs it no matter what opinions people tell you that you should or should not do. If he needs to suck would you rather he starts sucking his thumb or fingers? or the corner of a blanket that he will then start to have major meltdowns about if he can't find it????

Binky's do much much less damage to the mouth of a child than a finger or thumb will do.

Just a thought. I think it is working out for you to take it now but don't force the issue. Just let it go slowly and naturally. He is weaning off of it. It is going well so far but if you abruptly take it his binky will become the focus of his world and will be all he thinks about.

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T.F.

answers from Minneapolis on

I second that last post. I don't think kids should go around having pacifiers all day, but if he needs it at naptime and bedtime, so be it. My son gave his up on his 6th birthday.....his doing. Sound extreme.....other mothers are going nuts right now. He used it only to go to sleep and then not again the rest of the night. I asked him what it did for him and he told me that it relaxed him. His teeth are fine (most everyone these days will have braces anyways) and I didn't rock his world by taking the one thing that brought him comfort and relaxation. I wouldn't get too worked up about it. If you are concerned about other mother's opinions, don't and don't bring it up. What happens in your house, stays in your house. Good luck

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G.S.

answers from New York on

My daughter was about 3 and the longer you wait, the worse it is. People have their opinions on how old is too old, I love when I still see children over 4 w/them! My oldest wanted nothing to do w/the thing! The one reason I decided it was way tooooo over, was that eventhough they were approved by orthodontists, my daughter's teeth began to cave inwards. They went back to normal, but I was nervous that she was going to have major issues w/that, not to mention a NUK in her mouth on graduation day. You can read books, explain all you want, nothing is going to make it any less painful. My daughter cried for 3 nights and we just had to tough it out. Best of luck to you!

Y.C.

answers from New York on

I thought it would be a lot harder to take the pacifier away from my daughter but it wasn't, she did cry a little, very little and it was over.
She was 6 months so maybe that is why.
Now, sippy cups are a different story, she would drink for a cup but keep asking over and over for her sippy, but she will start school soon and I ask if they are going to have sippy cups and they say no, and they are going to have lunch time together and having them serve themself, oh so glad!
I say try it, you may be surprise, perhaps start pointing that BIG kids don'e use them any more.

L.A.

answers from Austin on

I would just say it is lost.. Keep telling him this and he will soon be past it. He can look for it, but it will forever be lost.

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D.P.

answers from Minneapolis on

Once you make the final decision to take it away...take it away. Don't give in because he cries for a half hour because he'll think everytime he cries for it you'll give in. If you're going to do it...just do it. We had my son down to just bedtime. We had ordered something we were going to leave from the paci fairy but one night my hubby was out of town and my son chewed a hole in it. It was the last one so I said that's it! I wasn't about to try to run out and get one. I improvised with M&M's I already had and left a note that there would be a surprise on the way. I think 2 nights and he was fine! I thought it was going to take forever. Some of it is I think they don't need it but it's what they are used to.

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