Four Year Old Son with Obsessive Behaviour.

The next tme you go to his dr.ask or call dont ask a bonch of mothers get an experts advice A. mother of 4 with 7 grandchildren no hills

i feel for you! i know that would drive me nuts. But, what are you going to do? when it's summer he will wear shorts everyday, and hopefully he will forget about this obsession. And, really, it's just a quirky thing we all have something, as a grown up we learn to hide it.

I'd recommend mentioning it to the pediatrician - I know when we've mentioned some of our son's behaviors, he's said he wanted to keep an eye on it since both my husband and I have anxiety-related disorders. We're both likely OCD - I am much more obsessive, and he's much more compulsive.

As much as I'd like to say it's a phase, it may be the beginnings of OCD-related behaviors that are easier to keep in check now vs. later. \

The other moms have given good advice on seeing what happens if he can't tuck his shirt in, will his day just fall apart, does he have a panic attack, does he divert the focus elsewhere.

Good luck! I hope it's a phase, but if it were my child, I'd want to have the conversation with the pediatrician sooner vs. later.

As the parent of a child as well as a husband with OCD, my big question for you is what would happen if he didn't tuck them in? Can he NOT do it for the day or will he go into an absolute craze that you can't get him out of? Our son was big on doing things in a particular order. If we didn't let him open the garage door or just forgot and did it ourselves, for instance, he would have to close it and then open it or he would absolutely lose it (extremely upset, crying, out of control) to the point of us not being able to leave. With OCD, it affects daily life to an extreme.

Our son's signs of OCD came out when he was four, so it's entirely possible. He started a medication for it that made all the difference in the world. The OCD is currently in remission, thankfully.

Good luck! I hope it's just a case of something he likes to do rather than an obsession. OCD is no fun to deal with.

My son has Asperger's and he had so many obsessions in his life.
I remember his Pokemon hat, he would not take it off.He would not leave the house and go to school without that hat.
He is almost 17 , and he is doing great, he has an obsession with hair now. If he feels safe with his rolled up sleeves and pants I would let him.
We have alot of OCD people in our family.
Just watch him, if it gets worse, yes have him evaluated and them he will get help, to deal socially...
I hope you watch the new show Parenthood, there is a boy like that, I love that show>>>
Good luck,

Could be, if he "just has to." Or it could be a sensory integration need – perhaps the feel of fabric or seams moving against his body is annoying, and he's trying to minimize that effect. Or he want the clothing to "hug" him more tightly. To check out that possibility, you might want to go over this checklist and note whether your son has any other sensory issues: http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/sensory-proces...

Good luck.

This does qualify as repetitive behavior and may indicate he is quite anxious. It would be helpful for you to consult a child development specialist or infant mental health specialist to get some support and better understanding of this issue. You might also consider how busy your son's schedule is...The Hurried Child is a book you might find helpful. I would encourage you to seek support and undersanding from a professional with experience in young children.

Good luck...

bev A., mft

I woul

I won't claim to know for sure whether his behavior is an indication of a more serious problem or not, but I'll share my experience for comparison...

My daughter around age 2 started having "quirky" behaviors. She was obsessed with being a cat for a while, even crawling around and rubbing her head on people's legs like a cat. That's when I first got concerned that something wasn't quite right. People kept telling me it was a phase though, and yes, with us discouraging the behavior, eventually it stopped though it seemed like forever. But other things followed. Around 4 she became obsessed with washing her hands, a classic OCD symptom. I sorta blamed that one on my mother in law who worked as a nanny and was hyper-diligent about germs. Again, it took some time and lots of reasoning to get her to be more balanced about it, but it did settle down. There were other little things over the years like pulling at her eyelashes, rubbing a certain place on her wrist and mine, I could name of bunch of things! But she became very OCD-like for a couple years when she developed this thing about even numbers. Things had to be done, said, or had in even numbers. If I kissed her goodnight, I "had to" kiss her twice. If she bumped into your arm while walking through a mall, she "had to" reach over and touch you again. If she stepped on a specific and marked spot on a sidewalk or floor she "had to" go back and step on it again. It got pretty extreme for a while, and if I resisted her efforts to repeat these actions she'd get very upset. Most of the time I gave in. But there were other times that I refused to let her repeat the action. She'd yell and fuss about it, and you could tell it sincerely bothered her, but within minutes she'd forget about it or get over it. Without any other treatment other than just occasionally forcing her to experience that nothing terrible happened when she didn't do what she "had to" do, it eventually calmed down to almost nothing.

She is 11 now, and I would still call her a quirky girl, and now and then I still see minor behaviors that are a little repetitive or obsessive. But overall there's nothing that negatively impacts her life. I know that she's got "issues", including ADHD like her father. But honestly I've never had her diagnosed with anything. At this level I've never seen the point in assigning a label. If it got worse then maybe. But I prefer to keep on things myself and use the natural healthcare resources I have at my disposal to help her manage her quirks. She's a happy healthy kid, artistic and different, with great friends and talents.

So do with that what you will. I'm not telling you what to do or not to do, simply sharing my experience that sometimes these kind of things really do work themselves out. I sometimes wonder what a doctor would have said or diagnosed her with had I taken her in all those years ago. But it looks like we've worked through it just fine. If you'd like the name of a wonderful woman natural alternative healthcare practitioner who can work wonders with these kind of issues, just message me!

P.,

Our child had OCD at this age. It does not get any better, and we decided to seek treatment once it was really effecting her life. What a difference! I do not know what we waited for, and I could kick myself for letting her suffer for two years. She also had sensory issues, and is now diagnosed with asperger.

I would suggest that you get him evaluated, and explore both the OCD and sensory options. Find out for sure.

M.

maybe...or It could be sensory issues as well. He could be tactile defensive to the unexpected touch the loose clothing do throughout the day (which stimulates a fight/flight stress response). He could be seeking proprioceptive input which is calming to a nervous system (think swaddling of a baby). I'd check out sensoryprocessingdisorder.com or org (can't remember)and see if your child has other behaviors that can show which sensory system needs more support.

I'm not a psychologist. But I wanted to share that I looked in OCD briefly b/c my son, though he's only 2 1/2, also does some ritualistic things. What I came away with is that this sort of behavior is actually a phase of development in many "normal" children. Basically they have a limited understanding of the world, but enough to be scared of things that seem weird to us, and they sometimes cope with things in odd, sometimes ritualistic ways. Also, it's my understanding that it's not a disorder unless it interferes with your life. So as long as he's generally happy and functional he might just be quirky. Not saying not to mention it to his Dr., but just letting you know that I wouldn't stress too much.

Two thoughts: sometimes doing the same behavior over and over is a comfort coping mechanism for stress and OCD is caused by an imbalance of chemicals in the brain that can be inherited, or a bit of both. So look at the medical history of your family and your spouse's family and see if there is any OCD that anyone will admit to. Also check for behaviors like fingernail biting, hair twirling, pulling out eyelashes, compulsion to perform certain rituals like washing hands, repeated checking of doors, lock, windows, before leaving the house, etc. If there is a genetic component in either family, then you will need to seek a doctor/psychologist who specializes in OCD and begin behavior modification. Drugs are not always needed. You need to start NOW. Good luck.

Wow! Lots of great answers! I have a daughter who has Asperger's. My feeling is, if you feel something is "off," get him assessed. If you feel that everything is fine, it probably is! A mother's instinct is usually right.

C.
www.littlebitquirky.blogspot.com

At about 3-4-5 years old... kids can get very routine oriented.. in their habits and almost ritualistic. I actually read about this in a child development book from the Gesell Institute of Human Development.
In this case, it does not indicate some mental problem or dysfunction... but an age quirk and the child's way of releasing tension or attempt to ignore it.

Now, if the child is progressively getting worse... then of course we parents want to evaluate it and seek our Pediatrician's advice. So go with your Mommy instincts... but at the same time... maybe he is just going through a stage and age-phase.
My daughter, does little quirky "habit" type things too... but it is not a problem in that it interferes with the entire day if she does not do it.

You might also consider that perhaps it is a stress related thing. Or a reflection of anxiety. Or his attempt to soothe himself... his gesture providing a sort of comfort for him.

have you talked with him?

All the best,
Susan

My daughter has certain things that bother her, too, in regards to clothing (and clothing only). She is definitely not autistic, though. But the seams on socks drive her crazy, so we purchased seamless socks. I'm also very careful about selecting her clothing. She doesn't like anything binding whatsoever. Additional ruffles or appliques (where she can feel the seem or patch on the inside of her shirt) bother her and I've learned to steer clear of that type of clothing. She doesn't like sleeves that go past her wrists, so we fold those up. And we only buy tagless shirts, or I have to cut them our very, very closely to the clothing. You get the picture!! I am going to mention it to her doctor at our 5 year check up next month, but I'm definitely not worried about what the doctor will say. I think you should probably mention it to your doctor, too.

It sounds to me like you might have to go do some lunch with him and watch him at the play ground play, he would love that. He might have some insecurities, or just a phase he's going through. He will have many more phases, so be prepared, my son is 18 and boy they go through many changes. I am a mother and his best friend. Good luck, you are on a good start with your son. Might want to do some counseling with him, to have an awesome relationship with him later on. I did it with my son, and it helped a lot, of course this was done when he became a pre teen.