C.O.
E.:
My advice may be harsh but I am going to talk to you like I would a friend who needs a reality check.
Is your family worth fighting for? It sounds like you are living above your means and not thinking about your future and only living in the now without regard to how your actions right now will affect you and your family.....
Consequences?
1. Foreclosure means the chances of you being able to purchase a home in the future will be VERY LOW.
2. You might not be able to rent either.
REALITY:
1. You need to figure out how you got in this mess in the first place.
a. You knew the cost of the mortgage - why haven't you paid it?
a.1. was there mitigating circumstances that kept you from paying it?
a.2. when you couldn't get a hold of BofA via phones - did you try certified mail? Anything to prove that you are trying to resolve this?
b. You knew the cost of the HOA and knew that it would go up every year and didn't budget for that? WHY?
2. If you can afford to walk away from it - what are you expecting to happen? Are you expecting to be able to rent an apartment? Or just go buy another home? Do you realize that having a foreclosure on your credit report will negatively affect your from renting a home or even buying in the future? THINK about your expectations - what do you think will happen if you walk away? That you won't owe the $$$ anymore? That everything will be fine? You have money saved up to place a deposit on a rental - IF you will even be able to rent at all!!! MANY land lords run a credit check and they see foreclosure - even in this market - they may not approve you.
3. If you have a two bedroom house and two kids already - yet you are bringing another one into the mix? What were you thinking? It sounds like you outgrew the house after the second baby came along. Sounds like you need bunk beds and a crib in one room.
4. If BofA will not work with you - find a mitigator. If you walk away from this you will not be able to rent or do much of anything as your credit will be shot, if it's not already.
5. If your husband has a job with a clearance - he had better go talk to the security officer and let them know what's going on so he doesn't lose his clearance.
6. You CAN sell your home. Just because you have a foreclosure notice doesn't mean you can't sell. It just means that you might not walk away with any money and MAY have to owe the bank money if it's a short-sell.
7. You can contact another company that deals in high-risk mortgages - you might end up paying more.
8. Consider bankruptcy - if there is job loss, etc. that has caused this - file bankruptcy - but keep in mind - you are looking at a mortgage payment AND HOA fees costs in order to do this (the fees for filing is $399 and the lawyer fees are usually $1500 and up) the longer you wait - the worse it gets.
9. if you both have jobs and have been putting money into an IRA - consider taking that money out to become solvent again. Yes, you will have to pay taxes on that and you will have to pay a penalty for early withdrawal - but really - you want to be homeless or do you expect to apply for welfare?
The bottom line - in my opinion - if you can't afford the house - sell it while you still have that option.
You need to live within your means. If you have credit cards - stop using them. GO TO A CASH ONLY basis. No, it's not easy - but it's worth it. We have been credit card free for 4 years. The first year was hard - but man - it's sooo great only getting electric, gas, etc. bills every month in the mail. It's great knowing that we have money in savings and whatever I buy is MINE not a loan from my future earnings.
You have to learn to live within your means - and not use credit cards to get by. This will set a great example for your children and make your life easier. No, I am not stating that you have to pay cash for a home - that's not it - it's about not keeping up with the Jones'. IF you don't need two cars - sell one. Use coupons when shopping. Make a list of what you need and stick to it. Make a list of where you need to go and go in order so you don't waste gas running all over town, criss-crossing, etc.
Need money now? Do you have high value items? Have a yard sale to get rid of the excess. Things are of high value - sell on craigslist or ebay. Craigslist is free. Ebay has fees involved.
Find a better paying job to get more money in the door on a regular basis.
Believe it or not, I'm sorry you are going through this. THINK about what you want for your and your family's future. Make a road map of your goals - what you want and what you need - remember your needs (are the basics, NOT keeping up with the Jones') are the most important - you NEED food, a roof over your head, clothes on your back. Then make a plan on how you are going to get there.
Shop for clothes for the kids at Goodwill - they outgrow them so fast - why spend retail on them? If you aren't a model - don't buy brand name clothes - shop at Wal-Mart if you HAVE to have new clothes. If not - make do with what you have.
There are many ways to shed the excess and get through this. This isn't a pity party. You have five minutes to pout and then get to work. This is your family we are talking about.