First Time Mom to Be

C.

You cannot go through nine months worrying about everything that happened to everyone else. Put your faith and trust in God.

My youngest was born with the cord around his neck. He was almost black. He survived and it a good looking 24 year old young man, graduated, and works a full time job. With all the modern technology and all the ultra sounds they do, you will be able to see if the cord is wrapped around the neck.Enjoy caring your child and try not to worry so much. Listen to your doctor's advice. The only thing I can tell you is that the last two months he was not moving, and my first child moved until I went into delivery.

Enjoy being pregnant and try not to worry so much.

S. Miller

Congratulations on your coming baby! I was scared to death to have a baby because I was worried I wouldn't know what to do with it or even like it. But - you learn what to do, and I love my son to pieces!

There are many things that can go wrong during pregnancy, the vast majority of which we have no control over. My husband is a registered nurse, and he told me not to read any medical books about pregnancy or delivery, because of all the ways things can go wrong, how quickly they can go wrong, and how badly. So I had to turn that part of my brain off and leave it to God.

I'd hoped to deliver naturally, and had looked into hypnobirthing, but at 37 weeks, numerous complications suddenly cropped up and I had my son two days after my OB visit, by C-section. I took from this that, do all I can, do the best I can, I will never be fully in control of my life again. That's what children do to your life!

Please don't be afraid to trust your doctor or to rely on the blessings of modern medicine, either. My son and I would likely be dead without the regular OB visits, the ultrasound, the diagnostic tests, or a good surgeon. This despite having a remarkably healthy 37 weeks of pregnancy. Hypnotherapy or meditation, as others have suggested, are very useful in helping YOU calm down and feel more relaxed, and that is good for your baby, too. If you are regular in your practice, it will help you relax in the hospital. (My OB had suggested it to me as an option.)

Also, regarding an earlier response, my mother-in-law was determined to have her children completely naturally, no drugs of any kind. She spent three days in labor with her first child (in 1978), until her doctor told her she was making absolutely no progress, and she was too exhausted and dehydrated to continue. She was given the option of a pain-killer or a C-section. She took something to dull the pain, which allowed her a 20-minute rest, which was enough for her body to finally get everything coordinated for delivery. For whatever reason, and despite her formidable determination, my mother-in-law's body was never able to deliver vaginally without a pain killer of some sort (generally an epidural after the first child). She had seven kids. She also was an RN and later a nursing instructor. So, while vaginal delivery has worked rather well for many women throughout the centuries, there is a reason for obstetrics being a medical specialty, and doctors and surgeons have saved numerous lives through medical intervention. If you do want to deliver completely naturally, by all means prepare yourself for it and go for it! But don't be hostile to doctors or let people scare you away from medical intervention, because most people benefit from such intervention and the babies grow up healthy and sound. Just remember to trust to God and to turn off the worry in your mind and enjoy these last couple months of completely free time!!

First of all, be assured that it's very rare. (And congratulations! It's a beautiful thing!)

I don't know that you really can do much to prevent it (raising your arms above your head actually doesn't cause it), but here's one thing: if your water breaks before the head is engaged, then I don't care if you're at Times Square. Do find a safe spot, but immediately go down on elbows and knees, and keep your head down and your bottom up. This keeps the cord from prolapsing (a similar problem, much like getting wrapped around the neck, just as dangerous) or, if it *has* prolapsed, it keeps gravity from causing the baby's head to cut off blood to the baby. Don't walk far, just to your car/ambulance where you will again lie down immediately. This will almost certainly save your baby's life in the event of cord prolapse.

Since there are a lot of myths out there about the cord wrapping around the baby's neck, if it were me, I'd google it and get a book from the library that has something like "cord, wrapped" in its index.

One thing to keep in mind is, the cord can get wrapped lightly and doesn't cause any problem, just sits there. At the end of your labor, the dr./midwife/whomever can do a manual check and if it's wrapped, can simply lift it up and over the baby's head so the baby can be born without any dangers of tightening.

Again, what I *do* know is that it's very rare.

Congratulations! By the way, I used a Natal Hypnotherapy cd and it worked marvelously (bought it online). You can always opt to get an epidural or whatever if you find it necessary. I for one was in transition walking around, laughing and hosting my midwives. The contractions hurt a little but were very manageable. No joke, it was incredible. Lots of women who use hypnosis for labor have similar results. Google it. Well worth the $30 or $50 I paid for it. Nice to have a natural birth and not have a lot of pain!!! And your baby is born so alert and can breastfeed more easily.

SPeaking of breastfeeding, it can be a little tricky at first, but you can have a La Leche League volunteer come right to your home or the hospital if you run into any snags. Once you learn a trick or two for handling any issue, it's so easy - especially when you get the hang of side-lying nursing! Then you can sleep through the night while your baby eats. It also means that, in splitting up the childcare responsibilities, yours entails lying there relaxing while your baby eats, and Dad does the dishes, makes meals, cleans the house, changes diapers.... :)

What i did was go to some La Leche League meetings while I was still pregnant. Find them in your area. Very helpful, wonderful support!

Good luck with everything!

L.

C.,

Once you conceive a baby there is really not much you have control over...well, you can get an abortion but everything else is out of your control.

Our third baby was born with his cord wrapped around his neck twice and he did fine. The doctor just slipped it off as he was coming out. Evidently though he had started showing signs of stress (dropped heart rate with contractions) so I was put on oxygen and put to bed. Thankfully the really hard part of my labor wasn't too long or I suspect they would have taken me to the operating room.

The best I can advise you is don't listen to every woman's experience. Yours will be totally different than anyone else's and it's highly unlikely you will lose your baby.

K.

C., My daughter had a baby boy 8and a half mos. ago, I went with her to the doctor when she was about 8 mos pregnant and my son in law was there as well, he also was worried about the cord for he knew someone that it happened to. he was asking the doctor about it. The doctor told him that there is absolutely nothing that you can do to prevent it. He also said birth is such a miracle that it is amazing that any baby makes it here safely is amazing, unfortunately sometimes it happens, it is like getting struck by lightning, wish I had better news, most likely your baby will be fine. although sometimes it happens, 90 percent of the pregnancies turn out fine.I wish you well, and God bless. Terri

ps. my daughter is also a 26 yr. old first time mom. He was 3 wks early but very healthy 7' 14oz.Also, I had three healthy baby girls vaginally, had epidurals with all three and it was great! has nothing to do with cord getting around the neck, that is caused from them moving so much, flipping and flopping,ha.so, I recommend the epidural, I thought I was going to die until I got them.

As an expectant mom I think we worry about everything that could possibly happen because we start loving that little baby before it's even born! Losing a baby with the cord problem is not a common event. It is not rare, but definitely not common. The dr. will monitor the baby's heart beat (during each of your visit) and pressure while you are in delivery and they can usually detect a problem of this nature and anything that would put undue stress on the baby. They'll do a quick delivery if that happens and then you and baby will go home safe and sound. Enjoy these new weeks and you will be holding your baby by Spring time!

I don't know if there's anything you can do but please don't stress about it. If it makes you feel any better, my cord was wrapped around my neck and didn't affect me at all. The doctor told my mom that it didn't even choke me when I was born. But if you're really worried about it, maybe talk to the doctor about a c-section. Congrats on your new little boy! My first is just about to turn 6 months old, it's amazing!

Hi C.,
I used to be a labor and delivery nurse for 4 years and I am a mommy of 3, so my advice comes from both of these experiences. 1 out of every 4 babies is born with their cord wrapped around their neck and in the LARGE majority of cases it does not cause any problems. My second baby wrapped his around his neck twice, unwrapped it, and wrapped it back again based on ultrasounds during my pregnancy. It never caused him any problems, and I almost wished I hadn't known about it to save the worry! There is absolutely nothing you can do to prevent it, especially not worrying about it. Like others have said, you just need to trust God to take care of you both. It is frustrating having no control, but I guess that is one of your first lessons in motherhood! All you can do is pay attention to the baby's movements. Ask your doctor to give you instructions on kick counts, and always keep your doctor's appointments. Congratulations! I wish you a happy and healthy rest of your pregnancy!

That's not something that happens often, but one thing you can do is avoid having an epidural. Regardless of what your OB might tell you, it drugs the baby at a very crucial time, and limits your ability to do what you need to do - like pushing. I've seen so many complications from friends and family members from these things - including cord wrap, c-section, blown vessels in the eyes (from pushing wrong), the inability for the baby to feed properly afterward... My own mom had one done improperly about 14 years ago that caused spinal leakage - lemme repeat that - SPINAL LEAKAGE - she's had back problems ever since. She's already had seveal vertebra fused, steroid shots, and is going in for another surgery soon. I actually had to remind her when this all started. I had both my babies naturally with the Bradley Method and had no complications whatsoever. I was allowed to go home at 24hrs when the babies got their final check-up, and they had no problems breastfeeding. I even signed a waiver so they couldn't give me one, or even an epesiotomy. I had to have a huge argument with a nurse during my second because she insisted she leave it in my room "just in case". I threw it out of the room so hard it smashed against the nurse's station across the hall, right in front of her. Women have been birthing babies for hundred's of thousands of years. Medical staff should only be there in case of a complication, not to create one. Your body creates pain killers that work, and are completely safe and harmless to the baby - and you. I hope this helps :}

I concur with the water breaking, head-down thing. VERY good advice. Otherwise, pray, and trust in God. He knows what he's doing. BTW, one of my little girls was born with the cord wrapped around her neck and was actually born blue. She lived and is not only 'ok', but HIGHLY intelligent.
Tall, lean, and healthy, 4 years old, now ; )
And as another said--it's rare. Try to relax. Stress is not good for your baby : )

If you do decide to breastfeed, you can contact me of you'd like. I haven't found a local La Leche league with which to be involved... I would love to. But I have breastfed five kids and have had to overcome just about every problem you could imagine : )
I can also give you websites and resources to reinforce any help I can give you. Just keep it in mind.
If you are interested, private message me, and I will give you my contact info.

Blessings! Enjoy your pregnancy!
--H.

I understand your concern! I lost 2 babies (early m/c) before I had my healthy 5 month old. I had a super fast delivery with him and he came out all tangled in the cord. It was around his neck, around his waist, around his arms. The doctor had to flip him around like 2-3 times to get him untangled once he came out. He was perfectly healthy and the cord did not affect the delivery or his health at tall. Just tell your OB about your concern and ask for frequent ultrasounds if it will make you feel better. Also during delivery you will have a monitor on that will tell you the bb's heart rate. The nurses and doctor will be able to tell by that if the baby is stressed by something like a cord around the neck.

C.-- Congrats on your pregnancy and the situation that you are speaking about is EXTREMELY RARE. My mother had 8 children and 7 of them were born vaginally without any problems. Her last child was born via c-section because he would not come out through regular labor and when they went in, they found out that the cord was wrapped around his neck. Fortunately, he was delivered without any problems, but my mom was 45 years old at the time and this was back in the late 70's.

Don't worry about this situation at all. You can always take those neonatal tests, but I would just eat healthy through this pregnancy and try to enjoy it. There are so many positives that you're going to experience during this time. Ask your obstetrician about this issue also because they are the experts, but just try to relax and let nature do what it is supposed to do.

Be blessed!

L.
www.stcmemmoriesfriends.ning.com

Hi C.!

Congrats on your baby boy! Being pregnant is one of the most beautiful things in the world! I have a 3 month old and he was born with the cord around his neck. During labor, every time I had a contraction his heart rate would drop. We ended up doing an emergency c-section and that's when they saw the cord. He was fine and healthy and didn't have any problems. He was very alert when he was born and was able to breast feed just fine.

Try not to worry and enjoy your pregnancy. He'll be here before you know it!!

Congradulations on your pregnancy, and don't worry so much. Like others have said, it is rare.

I had a friend who had that happened too. It is disturbing and it caused me to worry as well because I too was pregnant. However there is nothing they did to cause that to happen. It is just an accident. This occurs when the baby is very small and can move around enough to knot the cord. It usually doesn't tighten until later in pregnancy or during the move down the birth canal. Count your babies movement every day and keep all your dr. and ultrasound appts. that is about all you can do. It is in God's hands and worrying will not change a thing. They can usually tell in an ultrasound if the cord is around the babies neck. That happened to my first born but she made it. Good luck

Hi and congrats on your little one! I have a 15 month old daughter and of course worried about everything including the cord getting wrapped around the neck. I work at a local hospital on the postpartum unit and hear all about what happens over in Labor & Delivery. After speaking to a few different OB's about this problem, I've heard from all that there is nothing to do to help prevent this type of tragedy, but I can tell you that I have worked there for quite a while and a very sought-after doctor told me that in the past 22 years, he has only had that happen to his patients three times---the third one being recent....Needless to say, hopefully it'll help you to know that it is indeed quite rare. Good luck!

Less than a week before my son was due, the doctor got nervous because when she listed for the heart beat, it was a little low for her comfort. She sent me for some tests and just kept me monitored for about 30 minutes. I had to do it two different days and then when my son was born, I think the cord was around his neck because they said his heart beat was low again. Just keep in touch with your doctor and ask questions. You have to ask questions. That's the only way to get information you want. I know it sounds like a "duh" statement, but when you're in the office with the doctor, you may be nervous or excited or whatever and not think about certain things. I did anyway. I don't know what they can do if your baby gets the cord around his/her neck in the womb, but just remember: ask questions. Keep yourself informed. Being a mother starts now- well, 26 weeks ago in your case or when you found out. You know what I mean. I don't really think you can control where the cord and the baby are in your womb though.

Hi C.,
First Congrats on getting pregnant. You are around 5 months right? You cannot think what happens to a friend is going to happen to you. If you go to regular doctor visits and get your untrasounds they can check how the baby is positioned inside you. They usually lay sideways until the 8th or 9th month. My Mother in 1970 lost a baby because the cord was wrapped around the babys neck. It let to an emergency c-section. When I was in labor for my first in 2003 my doctor had me pushing and then asked me to pause because my daughters cord was around her neck twice. She reached inside me and untwisted it. She continued with the delivery. Everything went fine and my daughter is 5 now. The doctor has to be aware of what your fears are so she or he can take better care of you. I feel I have to add, I had 3 kids in 4 years and each one came at a different time, 2 weeks early, 4 weeks early and 2 weeks late. I had epidurals for each child. I had vaginal deliveries and my water broke each time on its own. Kefah

C.,
Congratulations on becoming a MOMMY!!! I am also a new Mom of a 10wk old little boy and during my pregnancy I worried about everything!! There is an old myth that if you lift your arms up over your head then that will give you more if a chance to wrap the cord around the babies neck.....WRONG! It is totally a myth and there really isn't anything you can do to prevent it if it is going to happen.
You need to be calm and relax during your pregnancy and try not to stress out about things. The more you worry, the more uncomfortable your baby is inside you. My pediatrician always tells me that "a happy mom equals a happy baby" and that goes for being in the womb to.
Enjoy being pregnant, it is a beautiful experience and a gift!Hope this makes you feel better. Let us know when you have your baby!

God Bless