hi everyone,
short background: my boyfriends friend was recently asks to move out of his parents house, after he was involved in a pretty serious fight. He will be moving into our house when he is released from hospital.
my question: what should i expect/prepare for to help his recovery?
his injuries are: a sprained left ankle, a popped right knee, 'shattered' right wrist, dislocated right shoulder and broken collar bone on the right side. He is having surgery tomorrow to set the collarbone.
any advice on what to prepare for him, prepare him for, and/or expect from him, would be greatly appreciated.
Chels
he got jumped. they are keeping him in the hospital for about a month for rehabilitation and stuff. and his parents requested he leave because he is 20 years old, they think he needs to get on with his own life, and they think he is a bad influence on his younger siblings.
Forgive my question, BUT could you elaborate a bit on the circumstances why this man's own family would request that he leave.....and is it possible that you may be taking on more then you are prepared to handle?
No judging just caring.
Is this the same individual who had broken knuckles from a wall back in November? Sounds like you hang with a rough crowd. I'm not sure I would be so willing to bring that sort of personality into my home, especially with kids.
No judging... but maybe a heads up that you may be too close to really see what you are involving yourself in? Most people don't get "jumped" for no reason. And are you comfortable that the people who jumped him won't come to your house to try something else?
The hospital will give him specific, written instructions upon release.
Both you and your husband should try to be there, when he is actually released, so you can go over it and ask any questions you have.
Don't let him get hooked on pain meds...or you will never get rid of him:)
Yeah, the Dr. will send home care sheets and instructions.
What was this fight about? Was he jumped for no reason? I mean, it seems the fight was his fault, unless I'm wrong. Do you want a guy that gets into serious fights around your kid? (If you have any.)
C.:
Is this from the fight in November? Girl. He needs a full time rehab center...the care involved in those injuries is not "easy".
A collarbone/clavicle that has been shattered? No arm raising...his ROM (range of motion) will be limited. he SHOULD be in a sling to limit movement. No lifting - they may allow up to 5 lbs, but really - if it's shattered? Most likely not!! Standing up and sitting up straight will be CRUCIAL in his recovery...no slouching, no rolling of the shoulders, etc.
Wrist/carpal/scaphoid injuries??? Long term affects...if they crushed his carpal tunnel (the hole that the nerves go through to the fingers) he might have loss of sensation/feeling. It might EVER recover. Will most likely be in a cast to prevent further damage.
Sprained ankle - did he tear ligaments or tendons??? If not - it might be one of the injuries he has that is "simple"...if he tore ligaments and tendons? A lot of PT (Physical therapy) will be needed...
On the knee? Any ligaments, tendons or meniscus? Re-injury should be a high priority...since he is in a sling, I doubt they will give him crutches. he might be in a wheelchair...do you have a wheelchair accessible home? If not...you might be signing up for more than you can handle.
Good luck!!
You would have to get instructions from the doctor. Every injury is different.
Are you sure that he can't go into a rehab cetner? His injuries are really pretty severe. Are you willing to toilet him and wash him? He's going to also require OT/PT. Do you even have the kinds of equipment that you need to help him?
Talk to the hospital's social worker. You need help. They can get you some help.
Good luck,
Dawn
If his parents do not want him, why do you? Honestly, do you think he will appreciate everything you do and going to do for him? I'd say he will be released from the hospital to rehab, from there on he should get in touch with cervices that will advise him on his future options for living arrangements. As for you, while he is recuperating, use the time to find a new boyfriend, or explore some other life options. Good luck!
I agree with Mamazita. Be with him when he's released. They will tell him and you what he needs. If you can be present when he has physical therapy towards the end of his stay. The therapist can explain what he needs.
There will be written instructions but don't rely on those. They're often not complete. The nurse does a lot of explaining to expand on them.
This is not even your boyfriend but a friend of his. Do you work or stay home with kids? Are you going to be able to take care of the kids and the friend?
Caregiving of an adult is a whole lot different than a chlild. Are you willing to wipe someone else's rear and your boyfriend will be okay with that? How are you with lifting a 150 to 200 pound person by yourself? Do you have the emotional strength to deal with this and his outbursts?
It is all well and good that you want to help but I think you need to really rethink this over again. I have a husband who has medical issues and it is very time consuming and he is mobile. You may have to withdraw your offer. Let him find his own way. I know you had not thought it through this way but you need to worry about you and your family and not bring on additional issues that you don't need or can handle.
the other S.
