Eye Contact

Have you tried the "staring contest" game? First O. to blink loses! Kids get a kick out of it and it will help him practice the eye contact.

I can't imagine that a child who can play with his friends, talks well, is loving and social would be on the autism spectrum. Those characteristics are not autistic. The word "autism" comes from a word that means "alone". An autistic child is inside his own world. Now, of course, there are different "levels" of autism, but a child on the autistic spectrum will have many developmental delays and be primarily self-focused, and have many inappropriate responses, such as hyper-sensitivity to pain, or an incredible hypo-sensitivity to pain (My niece, who is autistic, broke her jaw while on a trampoline and didn't even cry! It had to be set in 3 places! That same child cries in horrible pain when you clip her fingernails!)

In my teaching career and in my own friends and family, I've had a lot of experience with autism and your son doesn't sound like that to me. I'd chalk it up to him being 2 and just having too many other things to do. I wouldn't expect a 2 year old to maintain eye contact, and especially not when being punished! If there is anything going on at all (which I hate to mention, just because it might make you worry needlessly) is ADHD. However, it is WAY too early to tell about this yet. Just enjoy his energy and this time of discovery and growth. He sounds wonderful to me.

L.

i'm leaning towards typical 2 year old boy. would he look at you as an infant?
My hubby thinks my son should maintain eye contact while he is being disciplined, I think it's unrealistic to expect that, looking someone in the eye is very personal and doing so when you know your hero is not happy with you just seems like too much. I'm not sure i could do that as an adult if my boss or something was "reprimanding me".
I know that wasn't exactly what you were talking about, so sorry, just a pet peeve of mine.
I guess i kind of think eye contact is something that they learn, kind of like if you smile at a baby they start learning that you like it and will smile back.
maybe when he is calm and happy, like you said at bed time,or waking up from nap, start slow and explain that he has handsome eyes and you want to look at them, start small and build up to a longer stare down. if you have to you could use your hands as shields. But i wouldn't push to much, just be gentle. He sounds like a great kid, which of course means he has a great mom.
Personally I think you would see lots of other behaviors with Add --although there is a spectrum. If he is interacting with other kids and his teachers/ other gronw ups then he is functioning just fine. (remember kids this age Parralell play)
That's my opinion.

t.

Hi J.,

I have read the various responses and have to say as a SAHM of two teenage boys that are on the Autism Spectrum,that I would DEFINITELY contact my Pediatrician and request an evaluation. Unfortunately I did not and now we are struggling because my two boys were not diagnosed until they were almost teenagers. No two children on the spectrum will have all of the same identifiers or "quirks" as some call it. Both of my boys are very different from each other, (one IS social in school yet still has Autism) and they each have their own challenges to overcome. Don't feel like being on the spectrum is a "bad thing", because it most definitely is not. These children have a different outlook on the world and they are a joy to have in your life! :)

If he is not on the spectrum you can breathe a sigh of relief, but if he is, early intervention is the key to success in school and "learning" the behaviors that do not come naturally to these kids. Eye contact is only one symptom, but it would give you peace of mind to know now.

I wish the best for you and your son.

S.

If it concerns you, get him evaluated...was the worst that could happen? Either they say he is on the spectrum or he isn't and it's better to play it safe than sorry because an early approach will have the best results.From what you said he sounds like a typical boy but it can't hurt to know for sure and have that piece of mind.

Absolutely not! I have 5 kids and for a 2 year old to hold their attention and look in your eyes is allot to expect with some children. My triplets are 4 and I still can't always keep their attention, lol!

K. B
mom to 5 including triplets

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You've already gotten a few responses saying the same thing, but I have a 2 yr old son (& 1 month) and your son sounds like mine. I don't think it is something to worry about. Just keep it in the back of your head or even write it down and ask your pediatrician at his next doctor's appt.

Based on my experience with my 2 sons (ages 3 and 6)..it is completely normal. If he is interacting well with other children and behaves normally otherwise - I would not think of an autism link. Having children learn about eye contact is important. I try to "stop" them from moving and I look at them right in the eye and speak to them. Sometimes I think that is the only way they hear me : ) Hmmm - same thing goes for my husband. Ah...men : )

Hi J.,
Just from personal, recent experience, I would highly recommend that you call your son's pediatrician about this right away. Make an appointment and ask your pediatrician if he/she feels you should get your son evaluated by the Chester County Early Intervention group. They will come to your house (free of charge) and evaluate your son in your home. These folks are experts and they can give you a very good idea if your son should also go in front of the Chester County CATCH team for an Autism evaluation. Your doctor can tell you more.

My son is 2 and we just went through this whole process. My son has been in physical therapy for walking for almost 9 months along with Occupational, Speech, etc. for his delays. He is doing great walking but still isn't talking other than Mama and Dada. I know when he was evaluated for Autism they did say that eye contact is one of the top red flags for the condition. These folks are top notch professionals from CHOP and are very sweet and helpful every step of the way. My son was diagnosed last week with mild to moderate Autism and developmental delays but if you met him you'd think he was perfectly normal with the exception of his language skills.

The key with Autism or Aspergers Syndrome is to catch it as early as possible and get our son as much therapy that is necessary prior to starting school. All children aren't classically autistic but your son could be on the autism spectrum (as they call it). Now is the time to investigate it and see what the pros think.

Don't panic and don't worry, they do "label" these children in an effort to get them the services they need when necessary.

I wish you luck.

L.

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Hi J.,
While I agree it would not hurt to have him evaluated for aspergers, you may also want to look into CVI - Cortical Visual Impairment. We think my son has this in a very mild form, It is a sensory stimulation issue that the part of the brain that processes visual information is not functioing as well as it could and makes organizing visual information overwhelming to the child(i.e avoid eye contact). We had a consultation from an orientation and mobility specialist from the Overbrook school for the blind- arranged through early intervention (no my son is not going blind, these are just people who specialize in vision issues) who suggested that my sons orientation and eye contact issues may be related to a very mild case of CVI. We are having a follow up appointment with Dr. Grant Lui(5/7) at CHOP who is a neuro-opthamologist and specializes in these kinds of issues. There is also a possibility that my son has double vision which we will also have Dr. Lui evaluate.
Our case is a little more complex in that my son was diagnosed with Infantile Spasms, a seizure disorder at 6 months. He is now in recovery and doing well, but the eye contact issue was ongoing, and also had me concerned about autism/aspergers even though he is loving, interactive, socially motivated etc.
Anyway, just wanted to put our experience out there in case it may be applicable for your situation.

Take Care, S.

If he had Autism he would have social issues even kids with Aspergers have major social issues. My daughter has PDD-NOS, she has speech problems, behavior problems and social issues, she is very quirky. If your son plays well with other kids and doesn't show any other sings of Autism I think he is fine I wouldn't worry.

BTW, I have a child with high functioning Autism. It doesn't sound like from your description of the "problem" that he has Autism. Kids with Autism have social issues and they are quirky, he would be different from other kids and adults and the kids would know something was up with him.

normal for kids not to look at you when disciplining.

How is his speech? does he freak out with noise?

sounds pretty normal. My still does it at 7 1/2 years and something that he has worked on since he was 3 as he has a speech delay and he has to focus. He was tested for autism, due to speech and eye and behavior issues, but negative, due to the speech delay and not being able to talk.

I think that it is normal. He sounds very smart. I would not worry about it too much at this point. sounds like he looks the other way because he knows he is not being good.

HI, J.
My son is 5 years old. He is so smart. He is already reasing. When he was almost 3 I had the same issue. He could do everything but maintain eye contact. I had him evaluated and the diagnoised him with Aspergers. My son till this day is awesome, he is smart funny and well behaved. He has his boy moments when he gets into everything. He still doesn't maintain eye contact long, but we work on it when we talk just to talk. The doctor says it is a trait he can be taught. Good luck enjoy your son!