the BEST thing you can do is to meet with a Registered Dietician and really learn from them about what's currently accepted scientifically and medically. Most often, insurance covers the cost of the visit, and dieticians are available through every hospital.
A few years ago the USDA changed the food pyramid from one standard showing how many servings of different foods were recommended/day to several that had different serving suggestions based upon many factors. It was really confusing.
Weight Watchers is universally regarded as the most balanced approach to meals because it doesn't sacrifice carbs for proteins, fat for carbs, etc.
A Diabetic cook book is generally really balanced because it keeps carbs within reason, focuses on lean meats (since most people with diabetes also have cardiovascular issues) and PORTION SIZE (my personal downfall).
Anything fried is going to be worse than something baked. Grilled is great, but some people are trying to prove grilling releases free-radicals and produces carcinogens. No definitive answer to that one.
Anything you prepare on your own is generally better than anything that can be purchased. I never buy packaged rices, side dishes. Look at the sodium content on most, and they're awful. High sodium usually leads to water retention which can also have an effect on cardiovascular health.
Product labels are tough - a dietician will definitely help you. Here's a nice "how to" from the FDA:
http://www.fda.gov/food/labelingnutrition/consumerinforma...
Here are the key points:
1. Portion size. Not all foods have the same portion sizes. You want few calories in a decent size (usually 1/2-1 cup).
2. Calories
3. Fats - generally, you want unsaturated fats, but there's been a lot of debate recently over whether margarine or butter is better. There's no clear answer currently. Good sources of fat are from olives, almonds, fish oil, etc.
4. Sodium - you want to have ~2400 mg per day based upon a 2000-2200 calorie diet
5. Carbs - doesn't mean "table sugar" (sucrose). Carbs can come from many sources, so products that are "sugar free" only mean they don't have table sugar but may have as many carbs from other sources - tricky!
The more fiber the have the better. We should get ~25g of fiber/day. We usually don't get close to that
6. Protein - the amount you need is questionable. Too much can be unhealthy, so do some research. But, protein is generally good.
Good luck. Sorry for the long message, as you can tell, it's something I'm pretty passionate about.