Does Anyone Know?

My 3.5yo sounds very similar. He talks ALL the time, right up until the moment he falls asleep even. Recently he fell asleep mid-sentence. ;) Sometimes he even mumbles in his sleep.

I don't think it's ADD so much as a lot of personality wrapped up in a little boy body.

Hi Shanna...I'm A....

Altho being a counselor/therapist and proud mom of 6 doesn't deem me an expert at anything..I do believe that I have learned a thing or two about raising kids. (My kids are 25, 21, 17 and 9...and my 17 yr old passed away in Jan 2002).

I hear alllllll the time from parents who wish their child(ren) wouldn't talk so much. When I hear this...it brings to mind a few things for me.

First, my 9 yr old 'special' lil angel girl has autism. She didn't talk at all...no words..til just after her 4th birthday. Until then, she only verbalized sounds. Then I remember, not long after she started talking...and her vocabulary quickly grew...I would daily (still do) thank God that she can talk! So many children with autism can't...

The next thing that always comes to mind is...we all spend so much time teaching our kids to talk...then when they do (what we wanted them to do)...we spend much more time telling them to shut up/be quiet...etc....

My only concern when my kids talked (alot/loud) was when/if they talked at inappropriate times...meaning...in places where we/they should be quiet...church, library.... Altho teaching my children that it is ok to talk, but quietly, in these kinds of places was a must.

From my own experience and in my professional life..I've learned that with some kids, if you tell them to stop talking, they may not tell you things that they need to tell you. Such as...if they are being disrespected/hurt in some way.

So...enjoy your son...everything about him. His gift of gab is a gift from God!

A.

Sounds like hes just a typical 4 yr old. My daughter, whos 6, is ADD/ADHD, OCD, and Bipolar, and when she was that age, she did alot of talking, but she would have huge fits of anger for no apparent reason. Usually the doctors wont test them until they are at least 5 yrs old, but unless hes just out of control with running and screaming thru the house, beating up little kids or hisself, I wouldnt worry much. ADHD is more common now in kids than it used to be, and more and more doctors arent hesitating to put kids on meds for it, even if they dont need it. In my case, my 6 yr old has to have it. Hope this helps. Have a Happy New Year!

There is probably nothing to worry about, but my daughter was very similar, and it got worse when she got to school. I believe that is why the wait to test until they are school age. If they can sit in a classroom and do what they are supposed to do, concentrate, finish their work, etc. then there is nothing to worry about. However, my daughter couldn't do those things and the doctor wrote an order for the school to do formal testing, but this wasn't until she was almost 8, so we had three years of school that were horrible!!!!! I like the psychologist that gave you the breakdown of signs and symptoms. My daughter fits almost all of them. I waited a long time to test her or even inquire about it because I didn't want her on meds, but we tried everything...behavior modification, and a special ADHD diet - nothing worked so we finally medicated and this year has been much, much better. I wish you the best, but if you start having significant problems in school I would suggest you at least look into it. Until then, kids will be kids!!!

It never hurts to take your child to the pediatrician and express your concerns. Some DRs like to wait till the child is in school so they can monitor his behavior in different settings. If nothing else you can get a referral to a Community Services Board to have an intake interview and get their oppinion. You dont necessarily have to have a referral for these places. I know how hard it is to deal with being a single mom, student, work and have a child with ADHD. I deal with it on a daily basis. Good luck, I hope I have been of some help

hi T.

i know how you feel about you son being on the go, my son always was like that too...he is now 14...i wouldnt worry about it, if he is a happy child, and singing i would just let him be...you can get him tested now i believe...just let him know nicely that you love hearing him talk and sing, but you need some quiet time...can he go in his room, for abit, or try to be alittle quieter.

i know you are a single parent,but i am looking to get a moms group together in muncie, let me know if you areinterested.

L.

Some kids are just really talkative... it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with them or that they are hyper. My 4 year old is always talking or singing. If he's playing alone with his toys he's talking non-stop doing voices and sound effects. I think it's alot of fun to listen to what he says during these playtimes.. I get alot of insight on what's going on inside his head!
That said, if you truly think there might be something wrong, just contact your local school and ask to talk with the person in charge of their Early Childhood Program (I'm also in Indiana). It's a program for kids with developmental issues and covers that gap between First Steps (for kids 0-3 years) and elementary school. You can have him evaluated and if they find something to be concerned about you could qualify for services. They won't test specifically for ADD because that really can't be diagnosed until age 7. Children who qualify for the program usually attend the preschool program at a local elementary school. It's free for you and (at least around here) transportation is provided -- my son rides the big yellow schoolbus every afternoon to/from school. It's just for the preschool kids so no older kids and there's a bus driver's aide who chats with them on the ride and gets them buckled in (they provide carseats/booster seats). And no, the talkative-ness has nothing to do with why he's attending (speech and emotional/social skills delay).

Just because he has a motor mouth does not mean that he's got ADD or ADHD. He's only 4, so most likely, he enjoys the sound of his voice, and he enjoys sharing the sound with you and your hubby. Both of my children are constantly chattering, but I talk alot too, so I know they've picked it up from me. I doubt anything is wrong with him, he's just a happy, talkative boy. You'll eventually learn to tune tuen out the senseless chatter while still be listening for the important stuff that he does say.

Oh man this sounds like my kiddo. My son will be 5 in Feb....
And if he isn't talking, he is singing, humming, telling a story, whispering...you name it...
He is an only child, so when we have a friend over, I get a moment of peace. I think it is an age thing, I don't think my son is ADD or ADHD - I think he is being social. Can your son focus on playing or a movie? My son loves to play Thomas the train and he makes up stories about them all the time....
My husband works second shift, so when I am up - all I hear is 'Hey know what?' and then some random thought on Spongebob or Thomas....I feel your pain!
Good luck....

Hi T.,
I don't think there is anything wrong with your son. Mine is the same way! He is 4 1/2 and he is constantly talking, singing, humming, or just making noise. I think it is just part of being a preschooler.
We try to find songs that we can tolerate to help with the singing. Does he have any puppets or anything that he could play imaginary with? I think if you just keep his mind occupied then he will be fine.
Ours can drive us crazy at times, but at least I know he has good social skills!
Do you take him to preschool? That will help in taking turns and learning how to listen. Good luck, but I believe you just have a typical 4 year old boy!

J.

Hi T.,
I am a practicing art therapist and I work full time with children. Many people jump to the conclusion that children are ADHD and want to put kiddos on medications etc. I am happy to hear that you can see that he just might be an expressive child who simply verbalizes a lot. ADHD has clear symptoms that are defined in what is called the DSM. Here they are:
DSM-IV Criteria for ADHD
I. Either A or B:
A. Six or more of the following symptoms of inattention have been present for at least 6 months to a point that is disruptive and inappropriate for developmental level:
Inattention
. Often does not give close attention to details or makes careless mistakes in schoolwork, work, or other activities.
. Often has trouble keeping attention on tasks or play activities.
. Often does not seem to listen when spoken to directly.
. Often does not follow instructions and fails to finish schoolwork, chores, or duties in the workplace (not due to oppositional behavior or failure to understand instructions).
. Often has trouble organizing activities.
. Often avoids, dislikes, or doesn't want to do things that take a lot of mental effort for a long period of time (such as schoolwork or homework).
. Often loses things needed for tasks and activities (e.g. toys, school assignments, pencils, books, or tools).
. Is often easily distracted.
. Is often forgetful in daily activities.
B. Six or more of the following symptoms of hyperactivity-impulsivity have been present for at least 6 months to an extent that is disruptive and inappropriate for developmental level:
Hyperactivity
. Often fidgets with hands or feet or squirms in seat.
. Often gets up from seat when remaining in seat is expected.
. Often runs about or climbs when and where it is not appropriate (adolescents or adults may feel very restless).
. Often has trouble playing or enjoying leisure activities quietly.
. Is often "on the go" or often acts as if "driven by a motor".
. Often talks excessively.
Impulsivity
. Often blurts out answers before questions have been finished.
. Often has trouble waiting one's turn.
. Often interrupts or intrudes on others (e.g., butts into conversations or games).
II. Some symptoms that cause impairment were present before age 7 years.
III. Some impairment from the symptoms is present in two or more settings (e.g. at school/work and at home).
IV. There must be clear evidence of significant impairment in social, school, or work functioning.
V. The symptoms do not happen only during the course of a Pervasive Developmental Disorder, Schizophrenia, or other Psychotic Disorder. The symptoms are not better accounted for by another mental disorder (e.g. Mood Disorder, Anxiety Disorder, Dissociative Disorder, or a Personality Disorder).
Based on these criteria, three types of ADHD are identified:
. ADHD, Combined Type: if both criteria 1A and 1B are met for the past 6 months
. ADHD, Predominantly Inattentive Type: if criterion 1A is met but criterion 1B is not met for the past six months
. ADHD, Predominantly Hyperactive-Impulsive Type: if Criterion 1B is met but Criterion 1A is not met for the past six months.
American Psychiatric Association: Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fourth Edition, Text Revision. Washington, DC, American Psychiatric Association, 2000
The important thing to remember is that there MUST be “impairment” in functioning to be diagnosable and when compared to other children his own age it should be very obvious he is different. We can all fit criteria for any mental health diagnosis if we try to see that in ourselves or our children, that is why the “impairment” part is important. You mentioned that you are a single mom and have a very busy schedule. Your son may be somewhat anxious and that might end up looking “hyperactive” even when it isn’t. Best of luck w/school. I hope this was helpful! T. M.

I wouldn't jump to conclusions yet. This could just be a very outspoken, outgoing child. Growing up, I had two brothers with ADHD and not only were they non-stop as far as talking and doing things but there were also some serious behaivoral issues, which I didn't see that you mentioned. If he is in Day care, then if the providers were concerned they would have spoken to you by now. If he's not in daycare, then I would just wait another year until he starts school and see how he does there. He could just be bored and maybe once he starts school, it will give him something to focus his energy on. Good luck.

I don't think there is a thing wrong with him. Mine will be 5 in Feb and he's constantly talking, singing, laughing, repeated anything funny he hears on TV, it's just what kids do.
I put him in a private school last May and it has help tremendously, he listens better, it's really been great for him. Even with that, his teachers and I are both aware that he's a ver social child. He still gets in trouble sometimes during quiet time, and lunchtime, when he doesn't keep his hands and feet to himself, chatters at a constant rate, things like that, but he's perfectly normal.
I know how hard it is raising a boy without a father and trying to balance work and school too...just keep fighting and hang in there!! You and your son are gonna be fine; at least that's the party line I give myself on tough days :)

Without getting into all the ADD/ADHD stuff, my nephew is 4 and acts the same way, but he's fine. My sister makes him have "rest time" and he has to play quietly in his room for an hour. It works wonders!

T.,
This is so normal. I have an 8 year old that was the same way. He was and still is very active. This is a personal decision but I will not put him on medication. He has such a wonderful heart and to make him takes meds because he is very active and very talkative would make me feel like a failure.
Please think long and hard about your decision. The medical fields are so willing to give medications whether the child truly needs it or not.
God's best to you and your child,
C

Hi T.. I think all these mommas know a bit about this. my only advice is to follow your instincts as a mom. My now 8 yr old is bipolar, ADHD, RAD, ODD, and OCD. When he was 3 and 4 he was very talkative. Always had something to say. Everyone told me he was fine. He was normal. Until he got Physically violent for no apparent reason and with no warning signs. I only wish I would have followed my instinct rather than listen to other people who ment well. Then maybe my little boys IQ wouldn't have suffered as well. I will never know now.

Also, Have you thought he might just be talking to get your attention all the time. My daughter, who is almost 3 and completely normal, talks all the time too. But the exeption is that she doesn't repeat everything as much as her brother did. But she does it to get me to pay attention to her. Or she does it to make me laugh.

All I am Saying is that if your feeling that there is something to it then get him checked. They can diagnose ADD or ADHD but it takes a little more detailed information to do so. Like if they can sit still with you for a book to be read or to color. If he cannot stay focused on one thing for any length of time; a few minutes for a 4 year old is probably normal. But if he goes from one thing to another in a matter of seconds, that probably isn't normal. I'm no expert but I have had my share of problems with my son to know a few things.

Follow your instincts. I cannot stress that enough.

S.