Does Anyone Else Have Shared Physical Custody?

IMO I think that is a bit much to bounce them from person to person every week but I have full custody of my DD and her dad only has visitation (mostly in the summer since he lives in MI). I'd say as long as the kids are keeping their grades up in school, dad isn't acting to them the way he did with you and they are happy with the schedule, then I'd leave it be. If it is affecting they schooling or well being, then start documenting it and then take him back to court to get a different schedule made for the kids.

~S.

I am a child from a broken marriage and I did for a while what your children are doing now. I went back and forth from one parent to the other and I Hated it. I loved both of my parents very much but I could always feel their anger with each other. I could also feel their sadness when it was my turn to go with the other parent. Even though I hated it, I'm glad I got to spend time with each of them. As a child I couldn't understand why we couldn't all just live together. Today I have a close relationship with both of them, which is very important to me. I think in the end you just have to make the best of it--divorce is so painful and stressful, but it is in the best interest of your children to have a relationship with the father. I would also strongly recommend trying not to say mean things about your ex to your children--even if you think about it all the time. Both of my parent did this and it just made the situation harder on me. Good luck with everything!

My children are 19 and 9 both have different fathers. My oldest childs father was in and out of his life and there was never a strong bond. When he was young, he had no choice but visit, court said. As he was older, I let him make his own decision. He now resents his father for making him do things he didn't want. My youngest has always made her own decisions as I have forced myself to keep a good relationship with her father. A childs life is all about them. Don't be selfish about your time, allow the child to make that decision as they learn as they age what love, care and concern really is. They learn money can't buy love. Fun times don't keep you happy forever. But an ear that will listen never goes away. I have built great trust with my children, they always know I will be there. I moved when they were 15 and 6, eight hours away. They both opted to stay with their friend,grandparents etc. Our contact and relationships are strong that is what really matters. They both look up to me in many other ways. This has helped them be more independant and strong decision makers, yet loving children. It is very heard as a parent share time, but imagine how the child feels. Don't pull them in a certian direction, as the rebellion may only harm your relationship. Hang in there, I did, and it has paid off in an unbelievable amount, their fathers have a hard time believing our relationship. Seeing is believing!!

My heart goes out to your children and you. You would think that the courts would know that this kind of bouncing back and forth is not good for the children. They need a stable atmosphere and regardless of whether they like it or not, bouncing back and forth is not stable.
My son from my first marriage dealt with shared custody and all I can say is that I see a total difference in him vs the children I had later in a much more stable situation where I was married and with their father.
Even though my daughter is only one year old, her entire personality is different.
I wish you all the luck in the world and hope you have a more realistic hearing officer next time.