Do You or Did You Worry About What People Thought?

I always openly talked about the fact that my son was a little tough to understand and that I had him evaluated, I can't imagine anyone having anything negative to say about that. As for kids who are close to 3, some speak clear as day while others are still difficult to understand and they all still fall in the "normal" range. Boys often talk later than girls, I know that my son walked early and has great motor skills...I think that's what his brain was focusing on first. Don't feel uncomfortable, you're a good mom for taking care of the problem rather than waiting til he's in school!

I'm at the point right now that if anybody has something rude or out of line to say to me about anything, I come back at them with something as rude as what they said. Usually they shut right up.

So no I don't worry anymore.

My son has speech delay.. he is 2.5. You would be surprised how people understand your situation. Most boys develop later than girls anyway when it comes to speech.

My boy now gets a therapist once a week to really help ME help him. Flashcards and reading to him all the time. He can say the words but does not use them to communicate.

Best to get his speech as well as his hearing evaluated (even just to rule out the hearing as a cause for his delay).

Good luck and God Bless. Hang in there and don't worry about what other people think. This is YOUR life, LIVE IT!

hugs!

Okay... my son was Speech Delayed.
From 19 months old to almost 3 years old, he got speech therapy from our local "Early Childhood Intervention" organization. It is free. I just called them myself and did not need a Pediatrician referral.
They come to your house, and do a full developmental assessment on the child. Then, they tell you the results, Then you decide if you want to proceed with their recommendations/therapy, or not.

My son, was only speech delayed and per the assessment was advanced in several areas for his age.

My son LOVED speech therapy. He knew it was to help him talk.

Meanwhile, SOME Moms, would comment on his speech, per his age. SO WHAT.
It is rude.
I NEVER EVER, felt bad for my son, nor did I feel embarrassed, nor did I act all weird, in front of him when others commented on his speech.
MY son, was smart and had NO problem communicating. He was just delayed in speech. As many boys, are.

I NEVER, made myself feel, that I HAD TO EXPLAIN ANYTHING to anyone, who commented on my son's speech.
Why should I?
That is not their business.
I felt, NO awkwardness, about my son's speech, at all.
And, no one, could make me feel 'bad' about it.
He is my son, and he is smart and able to communicate even if he was speech delayed and he KNEW darn well, what was going on.

My son, is now the most talkative one in our family. AND he has an ASTOUNDING vocabulary, for his age and articulate sentence structure and grasp, of language.
He is also, bi-lingual and learns foreign languages, very easily.
He also, learned Japanese at his Preschool.
He has an astounding, grasp, of language.
He was just, when younger, speech delayed.

KEEP in mind, that being speech delayed, is NOT a reflection of the child nor their intelligence.

Einstein, did not speak until 3+ years old. And he is a GENIUS.

When my son was speech delayed, he NEVER had a problem with communicating with us. He ALWAYS, could convey what he wanted or needed. Because, he was and is, resourceful. And he was very cognizant... of what was going on or what was being said.

The bottom line is: WHY should you feel, self-conscious about your Son's speech delay??? and being in public with him? He is not some deformed child.
He still is a child and NO child, is perfect.

I NEVER EVER, 'compared' my son, to others or other kids, just because he was speech delayed.
I was ALWAYS proud of him, for who HE was.

All the best,
Susan

LOL, what are they going to think? That you're a good parent doing what's right for their child? That you want what's best for your kid? That you're taking care of it early so it's not an issue later on? Oh, God forbid ;) You're doing the right thing. My 19 month old will be undergoing a developmental evaluation for speech in the next few months, CAN'T WAIT :)

My son was a late bloomer when it came to putting actual sentences together, Now he can go on and on and ON! My MIL would make comments to me about why he doesn't speak clearly, but I never really cared! He was my baby boy and I was-am always proud of him no matter what. Now my son is 8 and he speaks "mature" for his age, he reads at the 6th grade level in book's, gets straight A's in school, and when he was in K-5 they wanted him to skip a grade because he was what they considered "advanced" for that grade level, my husband and I didn't let him skip a grade only because we wanted him to stat within his age group and were also worried about him, for example, what if he got into 2nd grade and all of a sudden the work became hard on him, I also had a friend that had her son skip a grade and she regreted it. But as for your son, take him to get evaluated and see what they have to say but i'm sure he's probably just a late bloomer as my son was. It did sometime bother me to see how other kids spoke more clearer then my son, which i suppose is normal but I wouldn't let it bother you too much. My son started speaking clearly by age 3, yet some words were difficult for him to pronounce which I think is normal too. Do you read to him? Do you have actual conversations with him? Like ask him how his day was or what he likes or wants to do? Don't worry about having to explain anything to anyone, its your child not theirs. I'm sure everything will be fine and he'll start talking sooner then you know it! And then you'll be looking for the "off" button! lol...Hope you have a wonderful weekend!

My son is 26 months and in the 80th or 90th percentile for height and weight and says very little that other people understand. My husband and I have trouble understanding him most of the time. He has seen a speech therapist twice, and she says he is on the bubble. She will be evaluating him again in a couple of weeks.

For the most part, I get confused looks. Most people think he's at least 3 years old, so they are simply confused as to why he isn't saying anything to him. Once in awhile I apologize (like when the lifeguard at the pool kept asking him to get off the slide and he wouldn't move), but I usually just shrug it off. You might be surprised at the number of people who don't know if he's old enough to talk yet or not!

You're his mom and you want what's best for him, so of course this bothers you. Try not to focus on that part and just focus on helping him. Keep talking to him, reading to him and working with him. Listen to what your speech therapist says and go from there.

Please try not to be sad or uncomfortable. If it wasn't this, it would be something else. Some kids learn to run and climb sooner, some kids learn to read and write sooner, some kids learn to talk sooner. My oldest was great at running, climbing, speaking, but one of the last of his peers to write his name or even care about coloring and art.

Hang in there, and above all, just keep loving him. He's going to be just fine.

One of my sons had a medley of things wrong. Yes, I used to care, it was hard to find people to play with him, made excuses, avoided people. I know your situation isn't that severe but I TOTALLY know how you feel. I don't care anymore, some of that comes with age and some of that is that you got tired of giving people the freedom to rain on your world.

There's this idea that we are totally in control and able to determine our children's abilities/direction/interests/neurological systems/physical attributes/etc.

If something doesn't line up with the "norm", or isn't what WE want, we are at FAULT. We have done something wrong, or haven't done things perfectly (oh yah, mothers are human too!).

Nope. That's not how it works. ;-)
(though I fall into that thinking a lot!)

We do get to set our child up with tools to better help them flourish in this world. Early diagnosis is a way to help (ourselves) understand what will be helpful for our children, because we can understand what's going on with them.

We're all different. Our kids are all different. Disorders exist. They aren't a sign of doing something wrong/right. It just IS. We CAN set ourselves up to understand and add to our toolbox. That's what IS in our control.

Best wishes!

My oldest was slightly speech delayed (she did a LOT of pointing and grunting!) I did get comments from family members from time to time but it never bothered me. I figured she was just growing at her own pace.
Where we live they don't do speech evaluations in otherwise normal/healthy children until 3 and a half years old. She was considered delayed but still within the normal range. She had kind of a "baby" voice all the way through first grade, but she grew out of it without therapy.
Don't feel sad, even if he is delayed I'm sure you'll get him all the help and support he needs :)

Please don't worry about what other people think.
My kids didn't have speech "delays", but my own sister did when she was little.
I took care of a little boy who was exactly 30 days older than my daughter from the time he was 3 months old and she was talking way before he did.
Unfortunately, people compared him to my daughter and told his mom there must be something wrong with him. She began to worry. I was the only one who told her to give him time and not worry.
What does "delay" have to signify anyway?
My own sister didn't talk in an understandable language for what seemed like forever, but she is perfectly intelligent, never needed speech therapy or anything.
I kept that in mind with the little boy I mention.
You know what? He started talking and his mother wished she could find and "OFF" button because he was a very expressive child.
I truly believe that all the time he didn't talk, he was just absorbing and soaking everything in.
Turns out the child was actually brilliant.
I'm not saying that evaluations or therapy or any of that is bad, I'm just saying that kids taking a little longer doesn't have to mean they are "delayed".
And, I am fully aware that there are children who need help with speech. Thankfully it's available and that's what it's there for.
But, as far as what other people think....don't worry about that.
It's hard not to worry as a mom, but if you're going to worry, worry about doing the best for your child and don't waste energy on the rest.

Just my opinion and best wishes to you.

I certainly didn't care what anyone thought. I still don't.
My son - now a college student - couldn't be understood by anyone but family. We had him evaluated and put him into speech therapy (which he finished up with at the end of Kindergarten). He had one of the lead roles in the school musical... So -- fear not!
Have him evaluated.
Do what they tell you to do. Take him to speech therapy.
He will be speaking clearly before you know it.
LBC

This question hits close to home for me too! My son is 22 months and I have had concerns for months now but I kept sort of pushing them aside. I finally bit the bullet and had him evaluated by Parents as Teachers and we're having specialists come in another week to test him. I'm not sure if he'll qualify or not for state aid, but even though I know it's not my "fault", of course I can't help but to wonder if parenting hasn't something to do with it! He's the second child and so I have always feared that I don't give him as much attention as his sister had and that it will "harm" him...I know I'm kinda paranoid but I have wondered! ;) Ulitimately I know it's okay and that I'd rather have him get help, though.

I also have the same issue as Jennifer G. My son is off the charts for height and is 90th percentile for weight, plus he's super physcial and can run fast, jump, etc., so people are always amazed that he's only 1 and kind of wonder how come he can't talk. I just deal with it, but inside I don't know, I guess I am sort of embarassed, but then I just feel horrible for feeling that way! Again, I don't get stuck too much in pity rut, b/c I know all kids are different and he's a boy and he does other things really well, but it's hard, I think we all want our kids to be "perfect" and when they aren't, you have to check yourself, you know?!

Hopefully you feel supported and you both will get through this! It'll do a world of good to have some help and he'll be caught up in no time!

My daughter talked early and well, my son had ear infections which impaired his hearing temporarily and thus affected his speech. He came out of it on his own. My third son was extremely shy and refused to talk in front of people. He came out of that just fine.
If help is available, take it. If they say it's not that severe....believe them. As for other people....who cares. Every kid does things at their own pace in their own time and nothing will change that, and nothing should.

I did worry and still sometimes still worry, but when I catch myself over thinking something I have to talk myself back to reality. It helps no one when you worry about what others are saying and can make you miserable. I have been there and done that. I simply explain to anyone who asks that my son has dealt with ear infections and hearing loss since birth and as a result his speech is a little behind, but he is catching up.

My son has a speech delay and is in speech therapy. Overall, most people are very nice, but there is one person who seems to enjoy making me miserable and that is my husband’s sister who has labeled my son “delayed” and constantly points out his short comings as a child. She even mailed material I should be working on with him due to his delay! His “delay” his speech. It seems she thinks I am the problem. I have done everything regarding his problems with ear infections, but he still had some loss. He had his first surgery before he was 2 and recently had his second at age 4, which seems to have worked and his hearing is back to normal. I realized when I let my sister-in-law get to me, she had power over me. Thankfully, we live far enough away that I don’t have to see her too often and she has been told by my husband to stop her behavior. She has two children now and seems to think her children are superior to both my children. I don’t understand people who like to hurt other people with nasty comments. I think she gets some kind of sick joy of out of it. Like raising children is a competition. I am too old for games and again it benefits me in no way. Understand that there are just people out there who are going to be rude and judge you. I think when it is your own children it makes you so much more sensitive to what people think or it does for me. I want my son to be happy and he is. For his happiness I will make my skin a little thicker so that comments don’t upset me to his knowledge. I think one day, I am going to need to sit both of my children down and discuss their aunt and her behavior. It doesn’t help that my oldest child is only 4 month younger than her oldest child. I told her once it was not a competition in was parenting and now we never discuss anything related to milestones with the kids. We have also never told her that my son is in speech because it would just be fuel for her and more judgment on her part. My way of dealing with her.

My middle daughter had constant ear infections from the ages of 9-18 months. She barely spoke until we had tubes put in her ears at 19 months. When she finally started speaking, we had a hard time understanding her. We used to jokingly say that she didn't speak English, she spoke, "Kira." We had her evaluated and although I was dismayed at the initial diagnoses (she had other problems besides the speech), I never felt like I had to explain anything to anyone. Family members were sure that she would be fine once she started speech therapy.

We enrolled her into our public school's Early Childhood Program and she did really well. It was an intense year and she was fully ready for Kindergarten when it was over. Kira remained in speech (not as intense) until the beginning of 4th Grade. She'll be in 5th this year and the only thing we have to tell her is to slow down when she speaks, but otherwise she has no problems.

Hi B.! Kids develope at different rates. My son needed speech therapy. He was 2 1/2 when the state came in and tested him and he qualified for speech therapy. He went into Developmental Preschool at age 3 and it worked WONDERS! It helped so much! I was comfortable in public. I was concerned with his lack of speech at that time (he's six now), but I didn't have any harsh comments about it. I did feel however that it was mine and my husbands fault, but the speech therapist assured us that it wasn't. Some children just need that extra help.
Other children that are more advanced may be a positive influence, as children can be great role models for others. My son picked up things more from other children, than he did from me and my husband.
You got my support! Go full force with his speech therapy! :-) You may qualify in your state for free preschool for the developmental preschool. I live here in AZ and my son qualified. The state therapist that you work with will guide you through what you need to know and do.
My son went to a full day kindergarten at a charter school we have here, and he already knows addition, subtraction, reading, writing....he knows so much more than I did when I was his age. He has grown so much from when he needed the speech therapy. Your son will too. :-D Children are little sponges and as he grows, you'll notice a significant change when he's in speech therapy. Just amazing. :-) Hang in there. You're not alone by all means.

I have 3 kids. My step dtr is 15 and is moderately retarded. My dtr is 11 and is ADD and my son is 8 and is ADHD. All 3 kids have IEP's in place at school and my 15 yo has a speech impediment and gets speech therapy as well as Occupational therapy. I don't give a rats a$$ what anyone thinks. And we do get double takes when we have our 15 yo because she looks "typical" until she speaks and then everyone wants to look at her. It bothered me at first but only because I don't know why anyone would stare at her like they have never heard anyone who can't speak clearly? But now it doesn't bother me...she's mine, I love her and take care of her and thats all that matters. Good luck!

i don't have a child with a speech delay, but my niece had one. i just wanted to give you a mamapedia hug and some support. i was on the opposite end - my son and neice are the same age, and my son was an early talker. speaking for our family, we treated them both the same. she got early intervention and help and now at 4 1/2 she talks UP A STORM, just fine. i don't know how my brother and sil felt about other people, but the family all loved them and supported them just the same. in the end it's not our business as family to judge or give opinions...we're just here to support and love them. i hope you have that support too. good luck. i am sure your son will be just fine in the end!