Do You Ask People to Take Their Shoes off at Your House?

I don't, because my house is too little.

But I grew up in Asia.

I HATE wearing shoes in the house.
Its like walking outside naked.
It just feels wrong.

So its always a relief when others have either the no shoe rule, or welcome shoes off.

I will abide by the "rules" of any house I go to. However, I would never ask that of my guests. I think it's very rude. My goal is for people to be comfortable, and not press rules upon them. Plus, I'd rather have shoes all over everything them someone's gross feet...any day!!!

Honestly, I just don't really go to houses with a bunch of rules. Shoes, is one thing. BUT, these houses tend to have all kinds of other germaphobe rules, that I'm afraid I won't keep straight. Again, I don't have a problem taking my shoes off. I just don't like going to people's houses that you are afraid to get fingerprint on something.

I agree with every single thing Mrslavallie said. I too live in MN and everyone who enters my house removes their shoes at the very large entry rug. I do home daycare as well and babies crawl on the carpets and floors. And to me, GROSS. If visiting,who is ever going to set their child down on a floor where people have shoes on. No way. So for me, pat of this is due to my business being operated in my home.

I am not going to maintain my house because people can't wear decent socks. Sorry. Maybe this is a norm around the country, area to area, shoes on or off, but here in MN at most homes I visit, its the norm, Shoes go off.

Use it as a chance to wear those fun polka dot socks! I do!!

It's common practice to remove shoes/boots at the door here in Minnesota. There's lots of snow, mud, dirt that would be tracked into your house otherwise. I've never had to ask anyone, it's just done.

nope. i would never do that.
we have doormats by each entrance, and assume that our guests are smart and considerate enough to wipe their feet, or voluntarily remove footwear that is muddy enough to seriously dirty our floors.
and if they don't? we'll clean the floors soon enough. this is a small farm and we have lots of critters. it ain't like this is hampstead palace.
i have relatives who do insist on 'shoes off' inside their front doors. it really twisted my 'nads for a long time, but i finally decided to quit being torqued about it and just do it. their house, their rules.
i put my own guests above carpets.
khairete
S.
ETA i never wear shoes in my own house! taking them off is one of the first things i do when i get home. but my guests are totally free to do as they please.

I don't know many people who expect this. I guess I don't hang out with "cultured" people.

I have been in homes where it was obvious and I had no problem with following along with it. My problem would be if it was expected and there was no nice way to accomplish it... in other words, there is no bench to sit on to put your shoes back on. Or perhaps if I were only planning to stay for a moment or two (kid pick-ups). It can be hard enough to corral kids and get them and their stuff out the door, without having to deal with shoe removal/replacement, while having polite conversation all the while.

Generally, I don't see the request very often. The people I have seen request it, usually seem pretty anal about stuff, in my experience. And that's ok.
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oh... and no. I don't ask people to do that at my house.

If you live in Asia, EVERYONE takes off their shoes when they visit someone's house. I take my cue from the host or hostess. If they aren't wearing shoes, I take off mine. I DEFINITELY had my kids take their shoes off.

For MY house, I didn't ask, but it was obvious to everyone that we don't wear shoes in our house, and our shoes are neatly lined up in the foyer...

I think it's nice to be flexible with this.

I don't ask, but do kinda expect people to and normally always take mine off or look around to see if other people are. I think it varies around the country and world as I grew up where its pretty standard and expected to take your shoes off.

In my State and per the many cultures here and per custom... no one, wears shoes in the house. Not even the inhabitants of the home.
There are even cute little signs, that some people have at their door.

Most people here, are barefoot. Not wearing socks in shoes type thing. OR if you know you are going to a person's home... that person is sure to wear something that is naked-feet friendly. Sans socks and sans sneakers.
ie: we mostly wear slippers here. ie: flip flops.

No..it is rude to ask people to do this!!
If I were in Japan...sure I would do so. It is their custom and you prepare by wearing your best socks or your not- so- stinky shoes.

But here in the US...it is not a social norm. It is rude to ask people because people are not prepared and could feel very uncomfortable. My home is a home...I want people to feel comfortable and at home.

We take off our shoes if we want to...and usually do cuz we come home to get cozy and relax. Often times people walk in, see shoes and proceed to take theirs off. I quickly tell them our home is NOT a shoeless policy home. Keep your shoes on or kick them off and get cozy. BUT we don't expect shoes off.

I think you have the right idea...and I am sure hubby will wear his best socks at his friends' "model home" next time ;)

We don't actually ask, but since we very obviously take our shoes off (see shoe rack/pile by the door) most of our guests do so unasked.
Also when I go to someone's home and they are not wearing shoes, I will remove mine unasked.

Given that the soles of our shoes are wet/muddy 9 months out of the year I think it's just the polite thing to do.
I am sure he was the only one that noticed his raggedy socks...

Good luck.

Another Minnesotan says yes. I make an exception for health and mobility issues or if someone will only be on my hard surface floor in the hallway and kitchen. If you are going upstairs, downstairs or spending time on the carpet shoes come off. This was an issue for my in-laws until they purchased slippers that they now leave hanging in my front closet for when they come over. Because we have dogs they thought it was "gross" to walk on our floors without shoes (and yes, the dogs are housetrained). But it's not gross to track in the mud, sand, snow or worse that others have described? Thankfully, the slippers solved the problem. I ALWAYS take off my shoes at someone else's home unless they specifically tell me not to.

I absolutely require that people take their shoes off in my house.

1. I live in Minnesota. People have walked through snow, mud puddles, water, or goose poop before they got to my house.

2. I may not eat off my carpets, but my children may. See above. ;)

3. I shouldn't have to clean mud out of my carpet. Again, see above. ;)

4. When it is summer, and dry, I allow my MIL to keep her shoes on because she prefers it, but she knows that when it's winter or wet to take them off. And the proof is in the pudding (or...the carpet)...when we go to her house, I have my children wear dark socks, because if they wear white socks they come HOME black. Their carpet has so much ground in dirt from wearing shoes on it! I honestly thought their carpet was supposed to be that shade of gray the first time I saw it...um, no.

I think my rule is the general rule in this area...my in-laws are definitely an exception.

Where I am from people don't wear shoes in the house, so I would be a little shocked if someone didn't automatically take their shoes off at the door. If someone didn't remove their shoes I would ask them to, but I would probably feel a bit uncomfortable having to do so. This is another one of those interesting cultural differences. Until coming on this board I figured everyone took their shoes off when entering a home.

having married into the Korean culture - most definitely. Shoes off.

I refuse to take my shoes off on moving day.

And I've learned to wear nice socks every where.

No, and I hate having to take mine off when I go to others' homes. I have foot issues (arthritis) and wear orthotics, and going without them for more than an hour or so means I'll be in pain for several days. I don't make a fuss about it, but if you're a militant shoe-remover I'll decline future invitations to your home.

We all take our shoes off. My babies crawl on the ground and I don't want people walking in with gross junk on their feet, or mud etc.

Any person who enters our home, takes their shoes off in the entrance. We have slippers for guests to wear. We have four pair of guest slippers. (We currently live in Japan. Japanese people always remove their shoes when entering a home. Sometimes you even have to remove your shoes when entering a business. For example: some restaurant, some doctor offices, etc...) If there was a party and many guests would be attending, then most people know to wear socks without holes, go barefoot, use foot deodorant, sit on feet to hide them, bring their own slippers, etc. I have seen all of those here.

Not wearing shoes in the house greatly cuts down on cleaning time. It did take me a long time to get used to this custom though. If I lived in the States, I would probably continue having people remove their shoes when entering my home. However, since this is not an American custom, I would inform my guests that I prefer for people to remove their shoes on any party invitations. I would also have plenty of slippers available for any drop-in guests. The slippers are on a slipper rack in the entrance, and when guests come over we have them out for the guests to change easily. We usually put them back on the rack when the guests leave. It also lets us know when those guest slippers need to be cleaned and replaced.

Including that information on an invitation and having enough guest slippers for drop-in visitors can prevent embarrassing your guests. In the summer especially, I also usually have some foot deodorant spray out that guests can use if they want. I also require any guest entering my home to wash their hands and gargle. My son has asthma and one of his triggers is the common cold. So, we do the hand washing and gargling. So, the foot spray is in the bathroom where I have them wash their hands and gargle. There are paper cups, and other things that they can use as well. So I never know who actually uses it. No embarassment for the guest.

no, i dont ask, but I'd say that 99% of the people I know just remove their shoes upon entering the house.

I always remove my shoes when I go into someone else's house.

Never ask anyone to take shoes off. We have two good mats for folks to wipe feet. If shoes are muddy they voluntarily take them off but no because I asked. I do not know anyone who require folks to take shoes off. None of my friends require this.

Yes, I do. Actually, I don't really even have to ask. We keep our shoes in a boot tray near the front door, and walk around in socks or slippers, so when a guest enters they usually notice right away and follow suit. I would NEVER ask elderly guests to do so.

When I am going to someone else's home, I always bring an extra pair of socks, as my feet sweat and do tend to stink.

Here in the Chicago area there are so many no-shoes-in-home cultures that most homes I've been to here are shoeless.

ETA: EVERYONE in my husband's Middle Eastern family removes their shoes, and expects guests to remove theirs. Shoes, in Middle Eastern culture, are extremely dirty, hence the common gesture of showing disdain for a political figure by throwing a shoe at them, or hitting a picture of them with a shoe. It is actually considered very rude to sit with your legs crossed with the sole of your foot facing someone.

I think it's rude to ask people to take their shoes off. I once went to a party where the host asked us to take our shoes off and it was so uncomfortable because I hate it and it felt uncomfortable to have dirt stuck to the bottom of my feet. I think if someone were to ask me to take my shoes off I would probably be bold and say thanks for the invite but I will have to go home and get socks/slippers and tell them that I'll be back and actually not return and maybe they'll get the hint.

People are free to wear or not wear their shoes in my house. I often go barefoot in summer, in socks or slippers in winter.

I never wear shoes in the house, can't stand it, it would just feel totally wrong for me. But I don't ask people to take off their shoes. But I notice a lot of people do take their shoes off if they're staying for a while.

My mom never allowed shoes on in the house just because it brought in more dirt to clean and with 12 people in one house theres a lot of dirt to bring in.

My MIL thought I was a real redneck bc I never wore shoes in the house and she thought I was just not proper to say the least and let me know it too.

So I guess it's all the way ya look at it.

It's common enough where we live that I'm usually prepared when I go somewhere now that they might ask me to take my shoes off. Often people offer at our house and I offer too at someone else's if I notice they don't have shoes on. Ironically, my mother thought it was the height of rudeness to take shoes off as hostess before guests leave. Now I guess some people consider it rude to wear shoes... We don't take shoes off all the time in our house. With the amount of running in and out, I'd find it way too much of an annoyance to keep taking them on and off. So there is sometimes some "outside dirt" on our carpets and floors! Gasp!! All I can say is I think my kids are sick less than lots of other kids... I clean/sweep enough that it's not a problem for us.

I have very light carpet that almost looks white. I have never asked people to take their shoes off but when people come in and see my carpet they immediately take their shoes off. I tell them they don't have too but they do. For me it depends on whose house it is as to whether or not I take my shoes off. At a family members house I do because I just like going around without shoes. I personally think it's rude to ask someone that you've invited to take their shoes off. If you invite people to your house then shoes shouldn't matter. I feel if your carpet is that precious than don't invite people over.

It's well known that if you come over to my house, there are no shoes allowed inside.

However, I don't make people like my MIL or other older people do it, it's too hard for them to put them on and off and IF someone seems too uncomfortable to take their shoes off, then I let it go....

I will say, I love the Japanese culture . Even when in Hawaii at a hotel, I noticed that this family had their shoes outside and were wearing slippers inside.. Seems to me that the home is considered sacred. I love that idea..

Even at my Buddhist temple we take our shoes off... it shows respect for such a holy place.

I would NEVER ask, though I like it when guests do so. We live in a snowy/muddy area but, like others have said, I put my guests above my floors. If they ask, I tell them it's their choice -- while I stand there in my socks, slippers or bare feet.

When I go to someone else's home, I try to pay attention to what they do: if they don't wear shoes inside, I happily kick mine off; if they keep theirs on, it seems a little too casual to me to remove mine.

Totally a personal preference. I remember, though, hearing somewhere that the first rule of etiquette is to make sure others feel comfortable.

I would never ask guests to remove shoes to come into my home. I don't care if they do but many times we end up on the back decking area viewing the wooded area where the bobcats, etc live, grilling out and entertaining so it isn't practical to take them on and off.

I've only been at a couple of homes where it was done. I'll happily oblige if it is someone's rule for their house.

I grew up in Japan, so we are a shoes off family in our own home. However, I never expect guests to remove their shoes. If I get dressed to go out, my shoes are a part of my outfit and I'd hate to remove them "in public" so I wouldn't expect my guests to do that in my house.

My friend, also from Japan, DOES expect guests to remove their shoes. But she has a basket by the front door of lovely slippers for guests to borrow while they're in her home. So when I visit her, I DO remove my shoes.

Well, no, I do not ask people to take their shoes off when coming in my house.

However, I would not feel put out if *I* was asked to take my shoes off upon entering someone elses house. Although I wouldn't do so unless asked either.

It's all good.

:)

We leave it up to our guests. We don't have any carpet in the main areas where our guests are so it doesn't bother me one way or the other. I don't ask my guests out of deference to my father who is an amputee. He can't remove one of his shoes without removing his entire prosethic leg or having someone take his shoe off for him which he would rather die than ask for that help. Also as you point out I would not want to inconveninece one of my guests unknowingly. I know about my father but I might not know about my other guests. Why make people uncomfortable when there is no good cause? In contrast when I am a guest, I remove my shoes no matter what. I can't help but think of all the icky places my shoes go and I don't like subjecting my hosts to that mess even if he or she is not bothered. Personally I go barefoot at home and insist my husband and kids do the same. I keep a basket at the backdoor for this purpose. It cuts down on the dirt in the house and makes the house cleaner for my babies who are crawling around on the floors.

I think most 'cultured' people have this rule now. I expect it. When I visit friends who are less traveled, they tend to not have this rule. I don't have it as a rule but I like it when guests do remove their shoes.

I used to have ivory carpet (it came with the house). Hated it. Keeping it clean was a chore I hated. Most people enter our house through our deck door that leads to the kitchen. If its snowing/rainy out...I might ask. Some people do it automatically without me asking.

We now have all hard wood/ ceramic tile, so I don't bother asking people to kick them off. I do ask people if they want me to take my shoes off when I enter their homes. If there are a lot of people at my house - I don't bother asking. If you clean regularly, that should suffice.

Yes, we do. We don't force it if people are staying downstairs, where we have laminate flooring, but we always make sure they do if they go upstairs where it's carpeted. Generally people just take them off as soon as they walk in the door, and many people ask as soon as they come in if they should.

I don't have a problem at all being asked to remove my shoes in someone else's home. And don't worry, I don't think anyone looks at or notices their socks. I know I don't!

We take our shoes off. Most guests voluntarily take them off. It's never been an issue. In NYC, where the sidewalks are just filthy, I think most people take their shoes off when they enter a home. It's just common practice.

Good luck to you and yours,
F. B.

I don't ask people to do this in my home but if others ask me to do it, I
comply.

Whenever I visit their house after that, I'm sure to always wear NEW socks. Ha

No, I don't ask others to take them off but I would prefer if they did take them off. (Most do) However, I take mine off almost everywhere I go because its ingrained in me since childhood.

I guess you should keep the motto that they say mama always said about clean underwear. Make sure you wear clean underwear because you'll never know if you get in an accident. Maybe he should through the old socks away and invest in some new ones.

Not normally but the other day we had a playdate and I did. The mom and child were wearing boots and they had sand/mud on them because it's getting into mud season here. I also had just mopped all my floors. Most people just take them off. When I go to someone's house, I always wear good socks just to be on the safe side.

We don't unless it's an extreme circumstance. But I've been to some homes who do ask so I'm always prepared when going to someone's home just in case, lol.

K. B
mom to 5 including triplets

Yes, everyone takes their shoes off upon entering my house.

It's pretty standard out here for people to take their shoes off when entering, especially when they see shoes sitting by the door.

I will ask that people take their shoes off because we have been having a big problem with goatheads, here's what they look like for those who have no clue what I am talking about.

http://forums.mtbr.com/attachments/general-discussion/538...

They are painful and when I had crawlers I'd vacuum 3 times a day, and require no shoes. they puncture bike tires like no other, we've had to go with solid inner tubes because of it.

Now if someone doesn't or it's to hard for them I don't make a big deal of it, but if you've been here more then once and know the rules...I will remind you.

We don't demand it, but we really appreciate those who offer to do so (I can only remember a few who haven't offered). In our house, it's not about germs. It's about dirt. At this time of the year, a few people can track in so much salt, dirt and grime. We have three children (all young enough to spend loads of time on the floor) and don't have the luxury of an entry with loads of room for special carpets for wiping shoes. If guests - and residents ;) - didn't remove their shoes, I would have to add sweeping the floor to my list of daily chores that don't have time to get done daily...

As for me, I always pay attention to my socks when going somewhere. I learned that one the hard way when I forgot that moms also remove their shoes at the local bouncy house. Oops ;)

My grandmother did, and my mom as DIL made fun of the rule. As a result, I wouldn't ask anyone to, but since I do, I'd let guests know that if they feel comfy, they are welcome to.

I do not, but have many friends that do make this request for a variety of reasons. I have no problem with either.....asking it in my home if necessary or doing it for someone who is asking it of me.

I have never asked a guest to take off shoes. But I would maybe if I had a mudroom. I do take my shoes off in other homes. I do wear fun socks so I do not mind! Maybe keep a pair of good socks in the glove compartment of the car just in case this happens again. lol

I would never ask...but am grateful when they do. My shoes are the first things that come off when I get home..mainly for comfort though :)

I have only had one friend that did this, she has white carpet. They had cubbies by the front door for shoes and when they came in the took off their shoes. So ours came off too.

Guests are welcome to do as they wish. If they are more comfortable keeping their shoes on, its fine with us, and vice versa. Some folks bring their slippers to wear instead of just socks, haha. In a prior home that I bought, it had lovely white wool berber carpet that could only be dry cleaned. I installed a small parquette entry and covered some of the carpet with plastic carpet protector, then had something for shoes to be wiped off. In our current home, we converted our too-small garage into a mudroom, so plenty of room for shoes or carpets to wipe their shoes upon entering. Before that was done, we had several pieces of carpet samples at the doors for shoe wiping.

I can't imagine forcing guests to do something upon entering my home. I also crate our dog if folks are afraid of dogs, I don't force them to be around my dog. Bare feet/socked feet spread germs as opposed to dirt, so I don't see how that's any better than shoes.

This could create a spin-off post: Do you require your friends to clean/vacuum their house before you visit?

I always plan to take my shoes off when I am a guest unless they state otherwise. I think it is common courtesy. I am ok with leaving them on in my home but most people remove them. And as stated earlier, in MN during the winter we have wet shoes/boots so at that point it is almost expected that they be removed.

We never request adult guests to remove their shoes but most of them do anyway. We have a shoe rack by the front door that we leave our shoes on so people see that and most oftentimes take their shoes off.
We do remind kids (ours and company) to remove their shoes when they come inside. We live in the country off a dirt road/driveway and in the woods with a lot of pets. All sorts of stuff can get tracked in on kids' shoes.

I can't remember having to ask an adult. Our entrance has an area rug, a coat rack and a bench to sit on. There are generally shoes lined up under it. Most people in the area I live in were raised to take their shoes off in a house, and their homes have similar setups, so they expect to remove their shoes when they visit another home. Around here, it is considered a common courtesy. Sometimes women will bring a pair of ballet-type slippers with them. Some homes have a basket of them available at the door.

I wouldn't expect someone not from a similar upbringing to think to remove their shoes, but it still doesn't generally need to be said if they do not. If you're the only guest at a party wearing outside shoes, chances are you'll figure it out it on your own. I would guess that people didn't notice your husband's socks, but they would have noticed his shoes.

Even service people around here automatically stop to take their shoes off! If I see that, I tell them to keep them on. Not only would it be inconvenient to have to keep getting them on/off, but it is a safety issue with some kinds of work.

There are other exceptions too. My MIL has mobility issues and leaves her shoes on.

You asked about smelly feet. We had a friend need to leave his shoes on during a medical treatment that caused foot odor. That is a great reason to leave shoes on.

There is a kid that comes over to play with my son, and he has to take his shoes off Outside. On or off, the child's shoes carry a stench. He refuses to wear socks and will go from dirty bare feet outside, put those those dirty feet in the shoes, to barefoot inside the house...so I have him wash his feet too. The shoes have to stay outside. I've thrown them in the washing machine when he spent the night. Clean feet, washing shoes and wearing socks solves non-medical foot odor problems.

It really depends upon the season. Right now it's rainy, muddy, and icky outside. So yeah, I'd ask that shoes be removed.

I've never asked people to, but my husband insists on it.

Always except if it's elderly people. I would probably make an exception if we were having a formal gathering with people. But I would be washing the floors as soon as they left. Otherwise my friends and family would never think about wearing shoes in the house.

I ask kids.
Not adults.
Many adults will automatically.

We are a household with wonky rules on this. Kiddo must always take off his shoes, and I ask kids to because they just aren't mindful about not tracking dirt and mud around. (We are in the rainy season here.) If someone asks about taking off shoes (which is somewhat common here for some reason), husband says yes. That said, I NEVER take off my shoes until the evening or unless I'm done being out for quite a while. She who cleans the floors can wear her shoes indoors! That said, I do leave my gardening Bogs out on the back porch and I do not walk on the persian rug in the living room with my shoes on.

But it really makes me cringe when tradesmen walk on that rug, so I now just roll it up when I expect them. It's like they just don't even see the wide path around the rug. ugh. Wish I lived where Jill lived. Many people I know ask for 'no shoes' because they have little kids who are still on the floor a lot. Or good hardwoods.