Discipline with My 13 Month Old!

Personally I think it is still a little young for the child to understand "no" and remember it. For a few more months you will still have to try the no, stop, ouch, etc and distract.
Dr Sears has a book "the discipline book" that illustrates what they understand at what age and some ideas if the hair pulling continues. Good luck!

Good luck! My girl is almost 15 months and we're also going through this. I am quickly becoming the queen of distraction: "Hey, don't stick your hand in the trash can, play with this bowl instead!" For the big ones I do time out in her crib (like messing with the cat food or litterbox--YUK). After 2 warnings, I put her in the crib for 1-2 minutes, then take her out, remind her that we do NOT play with the cat stuff (point it out to her), give her a hug, and get her playing (distracted) with something else. It seems to be working...

She is too young. She is happy and so she laughs. She isn't being bad. She is too young to understand she can hurt someone else, but if you are gentle and consistent she will understand eventually. Patience is best, BUT GOSH IT IS HARD!

At this age your job is to protect her environment and do exactly what you are already doing. Continue to teach her. If she pulls your hair let her know this makes you sad, but don't be mad at her. I think she is kind of young for a time out., but if she refuses to stop put her in a playpen for a minute. Distract and kind of break the cycle of what she is doing.

Get the "Love and Logic" books. They will really help you.

Oh man! Be ready for when she starts telling you 'No' for practically everything since it will be her favorite word when she's about 2 yrs old.
'No' has it's place, but your best bet is becoming a master at redirecting her to a more desirable activity. She's just learning cause and effect right now (has she started dropping food or bottle from her high chair yet just to see how often you will pick it up?). She's got a ways to go before she really understands what No means. She's not going to understand ownership for quite awhile.
I laughed so hard the first time I saw the Toddlers Creed:
"If I want it, it's mine.
If I give it to you and change my mind later, it's mine.
If I can take it away from you, it's mine.
If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
If it's mine, it will never belong to anybody else, no matter what.
If we are building something together, all the pieces are mine.
If it looks just like mine, it is mine. "
It's so true! They all go through this phase!
Be patient. She's still a baby and there's no way a time out will have any meaning for her right now. She'll need to grow a lot before you need to get into disciplining her.

you can't discipline a 13 mo old. Now, that doesn't mean stop doing what you're doing! You're laying the ground work and setting the tone for being completly engaged in your childs life and I think that's beautiful.
Now when you say no to her, she probably understands that you are displeased...or something along those lines but she does not have the ability to relate your saying no to her pulling the hair...hope this makes sense to you. (it makes sense in MY head! :)
Keep up the great work...you're a great mommy...and daddy gets some kudos, too!

my 13 month old think is funny when i say no i think is just to young to understand.

I am a new mom myself but I have been teaching ages 1-4 in daycares for 5 years now. I have found the following technique to work.
13 months is still very young. She sounds very smart though. Consistency and redirection. Use lots of positive words and encouragement when she does something right. When she uses gentle hands or shares Praise her by addressing the issue at hand. If she pulls somebodys hair or takes a toy redirect her. You can even start using a technique that has helped with my daughter. Sing the "uh oh song. "Uh oh Uh oh This is so sad." Put her in a quiet place making no eye contact and keep repeating that. When she is calm and ready to be nice let her get out probably about a minute repeating why she was there. Then praise her for sharing and using her gentle hands when she does. Consistency is the main key here. Its a process. It took my daughter a few times of this technique and consistency on my part to get a hang of this and we are still working on a few things.
Good luck!

At 13 months, she may understand the word no, but she doesn't grasp the concept. Hers is a world of right-now. She has little concept of cause-and-effect beyond immediate consequences.

A brief, firm "no" (no explanation neccessary) as soon as she does any unacceptable behavior is a good start. Remove her from the situation (ie. if she takes something that isn't hers, gently take it and give it back to the person it belongs to, then take her away from the play area). Then help her get involved in something that is okay.
If you can stop her before she does something, that's even better. You may already be able to see cues of when she is about to do something. Distract her away from it, into an activity that is preferrable. Whatever you give attention to is likely to increase, so avoid giving a lot of attention to misbehavior, and give her attention for doing the right things. Discipline at this age is really more about being there to divert them to the okay things than enforcing consequences for misbehavior.

I3 months is young and she is just starting to understand things like cause and effect. Remember that her motor skills are still developing and its all about exploration at this stage. "wow, i can move my arm hard and fast. wow that makes a slapping noise when i do that. Wow that gets a reaction from mom etc, etc." She is not trying to be naughty or disobey, or be mean or anything. She doesn't even get yet what being mean is.
Don't worry about rationalizing or explaining too much. Number one she doesn't have the reasoning skills yet nor the self control capacity. Keep saying no to her though and try to redirect her or show her the correct behavior. And number two she doesn't need to always know why she can't do something, just that its off limits because you said so. But be patient.
My almost 13 month old daughter thinks its pretty funny to hit. But I keep telling her to be soft and I will take her hand to her face and stroke it softly and say like this. Sometimes she gets it and sometimes she doesn't. This is normal. Babies can learn a new skill but it takes a while for them to be able to do it consistently and to remember how to do it and at the right time. I also have a baby doll we practice being soft with. Remember lots and lots of positive reinforcement.
Try to look at the positive side. Laughing is so much better (and cuter) than tantrums!!

Just give it time. This is so normal. Pretty soon she will be listening and following just as she should be. Just be sure to stay consistent with your discipline and be happy she is giggling about it and not screaming.

Good luck!

13 months is very young to understand the concept of time outs.

My best advice is to be firm when saying NO and be consistent in when and how you say it. It is nearly impossible to rationalize with a child that age, but you can say, "No! We do not hit" Then, ask "Do we hit?".

Good luck!

At thirteen months redirection is probably the best method for getting her to stop behaviors. If she wants a cookie, direct her to a better choice or remove her from being able to see the cookies. If she hits move away from her. If she pulls hair set her down in a safe place. I would still say no but then try to get her involved in a different activities. If she take a toy give it back and try to involve her in a different toy.

I've read that for time outs you are only supposed to do 1 minute per year so really the time out is only for 1 minute at this age. So once she has sat for 1 minute you need to give her a safe alternative activity to occupy her.

I also found with my oldest son to learn to share we timed how long each child played with a toy keeping it to just a couple of minutes at a time. Right now its Johnny's turn but it will be your turn in 2 minutes, etc.

Kids that age are not known for follow-through or self-restraint, or for their understanding of concepts "nice" or "mean," so it's useless to expect that. It will come very gradually over the next several years.

As others have suggested, distract he with something else so you don't have to say "NO" all the time. And when you do say no, be prepared to follow through at the same time by removing her hand from your hair, or taking the forbidden object from her hand and replacing it with something acceptable.

Too much negativity will work against you as she gets older. Offering desirable alternatives will keep her less frustrated as she gets older, and will help keep your family life happier.

Just keep telling her. Over time she will get it. She's only 13 months old, don't worry. She sounds cute.