Discipline for My 1 1/2 Year Old

Updated on April 24, 2007
A.B. asks from Sunnyvale, CA
5 answers

Hello all~ I could really use some advice about discipline for my 1 1/2 year-old daughter. She is really into climbing these days, especially onto tables. One of our tables has glass panels in it and Im afraid she could fall through. Besides that I just need to establish some parental authority right now and am having a hard time. When I tell her no she looks back at me, laughs and continues on climbing. I'm just not sure what to do when she keeps doing what Ive asked her not to. We use time-outs for my five year-old which work well enough but I think shes too young. I've tried making her sit in my lap for 1 minute after she does it but she screams the whole time and then goes right back to climb on the table again. Please help!!

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N.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Maybe try this... when you say no, be consistent in going over to her and removing her from what she's climbing on and tell her no. Be consistent, even if you have to drop what you're doing and run to get her. When you remove her, try to distract her with something else you know she's interested in. Consistency over a longer period of time tends to work pretty good and then they're just not interested any more. They may forget on occasion, but tend to ignore what they used to be so interested in.

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K.L.

answers from San Francisco on

A child is able to understand the meaning of a time out by 9 months, so you're a little overdue in implimenting that. You have to understand that your 1 1/2 year old understands nearly everything you say to her, and also has the understanding now of simple right and wrong. If she persists in doing things that you know she knows is not appropriate, absolutely put her in time out. Forcing her to sit in your lap for a time out does not work - you should not have to phsyically restrain her, and it does nothing as far as making her understand discipline.
All 1 1/2 year olds laugh in the face of a no from mommy or a time out, its just what they do. It in no way means that she doesn't "get it" - she DOES get it, all too well, and thats why she laughs at you. She knows that she can do what she wants because there are no actual consequences for inappropriate behavior. You better start the time outs soon, or the behavior can quickly get out of control.
Find a designated area that you can plan to use forever as her naught spot, and everything she perseverates a behavior after you have told her no several times, take her to that spot. You may have to do it hundreds of times to get her to stop the behavior but it will work (I am a child psychologist AND mother of a very stubborn 1 1/2 year old myself). Explain to her when you put her in her naughty place that she is there because mommy told her no, and she didnt listen to mommy. The naughty spot should be in a different room, or at least far enough away so that she cannot see you and look for attention for the behavior. She may not stay in the spot for long, but it serves as a place for removing her from a situation that is inappropriate - it doesnt really matter how long she stays there.
Remember that your baby is SMART - don't let her get the upper hand in the disipline area, or you're doomed ;)

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B.A.

answers from San Francisco on

I started using time out when my daughter turned one... Get a little kitchen timer so you can set it by her and she can hear the ding. My daughter HATES timeout because she has to stop what she is doing (usually playing having fun) and go sit down. I make her sit 1 minute for how old she is.. she just turned 3 so she has to sit for 3 minutes now. I think it works so great. In the beginning she would cry, but now she has learned that crying gets you longer time outs (it doesnt start til she stops crying). We don't talk to her or answer her questions when she is in time out. And as soon as she gets out i sit down with her and ask her why she was in time out, and what she can do to not get a time out again. Also, when we first started I had to stand by her so that she knew she had to stay there. Now I can go back to what I was doing and she will sit there. Just like anything new for children, it takes time, but just keep at it, do it teh same every time. She has a certian chair in the exact same spot every time. Good Luck!

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C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

Hi A., Just for fact that she cried when you put her time out says to me she understands enough to know that she cannot do what she wants. I say, continue the time out ~ she understands clearly that she has done wrong and cannot go play. I agree, the lap probably isn't the best spot. Kids like to play on emotions and she has easy access there. Good Luck, be more stubborn than she is.

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C.E.

answers from San Francisco on

I have/had the same problem with my son. When it comes to things that can be dangerous his doctor recommended the scare tactict. Basically when your daughter stands on the glass get in her face and yell as if she just ran out in front of a car. Basically falling through glass is just as dangerous. Scare her. She will cry as a normal reaction however, after 1 or 2 times it will end.
As I write this it sounds bad, but it works. There is no hitting, but sometimes the scare tactit works, and your daughter is stil young enough that you can teach her.
I wish you the best of luck, and my 2 1/2 year old son test me every day just be consitent.

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