I had three girls in less than two years. When we flew, I would pre-powder the diapers and change them while they were standing up on top of the toilet (with the lid down). I got so good at this, I could even do it at our seats. No, I didn't wipe them as clean as at home, but they were dry and comfortable and happy. The first thing I did after arrival at our destination was put them in the tub anyway. (Of course this method is a little difficult with a really dirty diaper.)
As for bottles, I would pre-measure the formula powder into the bottles. On the plane I asked for bottled water and just mixed it together. I brought enough bottles to make it through the trip without needing to wash and sterilize any along the way. Again at my arrival destination, the bottles received a thorough cleaning.
I was also sure to give them their bottles at take off and landing. This helped with their ears and they weren't usually hungry on the flight. Again, keeping them comfortable and happy.
Try to go to your local ACS (Army Community Service). They have a lot of support and resources for loved ones separated by deployment.
Best of luck.