My daughter is 9 months old. She still sleeps in our bed and all around is a very good baby. My only problem is, she normally gets up between 3-4am to nurse and then goes back to sleep but lately she has been waking up more then once and wants to nurse. If I offer her her pacifier she crys. I know she's not hungry ALL night long and I don't want her using me as her pacifier. Any advice? Any books I can read to help figure this out? I don't want to move her out of our bed and she does sleep in her crib at nap time!
Dear A.,
I had the same problem with my 7m old and her pediatrician told me to let her cry. It will be hard but determine that you are NOT going to pick her up. I did that and she slept the entire night every night after that. L. J
What you are describing sounds very normal to me. Breastmilk is easily digested within 3 hours, and she may very well be hungry. Also, teething happens around this age, and it could be waking her up. It is normal for her to need you to go back to sleep, you're her everything, and nursing is comfort to her. It is more than just food, it is bonding and love for her. My advise is surround yourself with friends who don't think you're abnormal, but support your decisions. Or, just don't share. A great book would be Nightime Parenting. I think it's by Dr. Sears. Keep up the good work, you're doing the right thing. :)
It sounds like she is going through a growth spurt. Moving her out of your bed would most likely only lead to more time awake at night. If she is eating solids, you might try feeding her a little more before bed. If that doesn't help, just realize that this will soon pass. If you can nurse her side lying, your sleep shouldn't be too interrupted.
Also, I hate when moms talking about babies using them as a pacifier. We are supposed to be our baby's pacifier, especially in that first year. None of my babies ever took a pacifier (I'm on my 4th). My 10 month old son sleeps in our bed and usually wakes up twice in a night to nurse, but I don't wake up much when I latch him on. Occasionally, he does wake up more often than that, especially before I get in the bed with him.
Hi, A.,
I agree with everyone about the growth spurt. But it shouldn't last too much longer, if that's what it is. Try to hang in there! :)
As far as what Robin said, about her not being safe or healthy because of co-sleeping, and that she won't be able to go to sleep on her own ---- my daughter slept with me for the first year, and she went into her crib at 13 months. I would nurse her and rock her, and into bed she went, where she quickly fell asleep. No problems.
HOWEVER, she DID still wake up at about 5:00 am to nurse each morning, and I would just take her back into bed with me to side-nurse so I could go back to sleep. At 16 months, I realized it was just a comfort thing, so I weaned her from that feeding, but still let her come into bed at that time so she could feel me close-by. Then, after she was weaned, it was only another couple months that she continued waking at that time. After that, she slept in her crib until 7:30 - 8:00. SO - my point is - don't let anyone dissuade you from doing what you are doing. Babies CAN and WILL learn to sleep on their own, when your family is ready for it to happen!
Keep up the great mothering!
Blessings, J.
She could be either going through a growth spurt or teething. My daughter wanted to do the same thing when either of those were going on. It should be temporary and pass soon enough. Hang in there. Co-sleeping is great, we do it to. Good luck!
My daughter wanted to nurse more when she was having a growth spurt or entering a new developmental stage. I let her "nurse on demand" whenever she needed to and it was fine. We, too, co-slept.
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I agree with the other Mom's who said this sounds like a growth spurt or possible that she is about to reach a new milestone. Does she seem to be nursing more at all during the day? If not, you could try introducing and extra nursing session during the day to see if you can get it to replace the middle of the night feeding. Otherwise, it should pass in a little while once the growth spurt is over or the milestone has been reached and your little one's schedule regulates again. You are doing great mama! Just keep following your instincts and your daughters cues and you'll both be back to your normal sleep routine before you know it.
I believe a lactation consultant at the Elizabeth Blackwell Center recommended having the husband sleep between you and the baby to stop this, but I'm not 100% sure. You might give them a call ###-###-####.
I hate to say it, but she needs to learn how to sleep in her crib. She may fight it and have to cry it out a few times, but this is so much SAFER and HEALTHIER for your child. Being 9 months old, she has grown accustomed to this routine and it will be very hard to get her into her own bed. She may be going through a growth spurt or possibly teething, hence the need for some extra soothing/nursing. You may need to rock her to sleep and lay her down in her bed, but all of my books said they need to learn to fall asleep on their own. If they do not learn this at an early age, you will have trouble further down the road. I know it will be hard to hear her cry in her crib, but rock her to sleep and then lay her down in it if that works. Good luck!
