Child Who Cries Nonstop

Hi,

This is very hard to listen to without losing your cool also. There may be an element of frustration for your 1-year-old, she has few other ways to communicate with you and her siblings. There are lots of resources for teaching sign language to infants and toddlers to help them communicate more easily. It helped my daughter who can really scream when she wants to. Also, remember to take some time for yourself, something away from the yelling, maybe exercise or walking or just breathing. Good luck!

T., it sounds like you have a LOT on your plate! With babies close together like that (1 y, 2 y, and a 3 yr old) it's almost like triplets. They're all still babies with a lot of needs, so that can be really really intense.

That 1 yr mark is ripe time for a lot of different things to happen, as you probably already know since you've been through this 3 times before:
* teething pain or other physical growing pains
* wanting to be mobile or already mobile, but not quite there yet (crawling/cruising/walking/running)
* frustrations with wanting to communicate, but not being able to talk/say much/say it clearly, so crying is more common
* separation anxiety is also commmon around this age
* possible increase in variety of foods eaten, so possibility of new food sensitivities (typical problems are dairy, wheat, eggs, nuts, etc.) making her feel yucky, thus more crying

So, a few things to try:

1) Teething pain - I know it seems obvious, but there are so many times where I've tried to figure out what's bothering my babies, and it boils down to unrecognized teetehing. Once we figure that out, we can offer stuff to help w/ the pain like cold, damp washcloth to chew on, other teethers that are hard or nubby, those hard biscuits just for babies, teething gel, and worse case scenario like if there's too much pain keeping them up all night, infant motrin.

2) Wanting to be mobile - well, this will work itself out, but you can certainly give them lots of floor time to crawl, climb, cruise, walk safely.

3) Frustration due to wanting to communicate --> Start using sign language every day to cut down on the frustration/crying related to wanting to communicate but not yet being able to say/speak much or clearly. Signing would benefit your 1, 2, & 3 yr olds, and your 6 yr old would likely catch on super fast and be a wonderful teacher to the younger sibs. A wonderful, fantastic DVD series for teaching useful signs to toddlers is "Signing Time" - you can watch these on your public television station like KET in the Cincinnati area (http://www.signingtime.com/pressroom/stationcarriage.htm), get them from your local library, or buy them online (eBay has some decent prices for the package - well worth the $$$, since it's like getting a full toddler sign language course that you can watch over and over again for you & your kids). Our whole family absolutely adore this DVD sign language series - used it (still are, actually) with both of our kids and it's so cool that our 12-month-old son doesn't have to get frustrated when he wants to eat or drink (from the videos, we've learned signs for eat, banana, water, cracker, more, hurt, book, bird, horse, boat, doll - there are MANY, many more than that, and we're still learning). He just signs to us. It's a real relief, for me as a parent AND for him as a baby really wanting to communicate! For more information on this series, check out...
Signing Time website (free clips there to check out):
http://signingtime.com/
At the Cincinnati Library:
http://catalog.cincinnatilibrary.org/uhtbin/cgisirsi/8Dr3....
On eBay:
http://cgi.ebay.com/SIGNING-TIME-BABY-SIGN-LANGUAGE-VIDEO...

A free, online video dictionary of signs is also available here (a *wonderful* resource!):
http://commtechlab.msu.edu/sites/aslweb/browser.htm

4) Separation anxiety - when she's particularly clingy, screaming, fussy, carry her around with you on her back using a good baby carrier like the Ergo carrier which is comfortable for you and baby, can be worn on front or back or side, will last through until your baby is a preschooler - 3 of the best options are:
The Ergo Carrier
The Beco Carrier
The Sutemi Carrier

More info on these carriers (including video clips of the many easy, convenient ways to use them!) available at:
http://www.theportablebaby.com
http://www.sobebabies.com
http://www.peppermint.com
http://www.ecobabies.com/

Plus, there's a local group of moms here in Cincinnati that meet once a month to share/try out/learn about how to carry your baby comfortably. Here's info on the group, the next meeting, etc.:
FEB 3, 2007 - 1:00 - 3:00 p.m.
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/cincinnatiNINO/

5) Food sensitivities - know how to recognize the signs:
http://kellymom.com/nutrition/solids/first-foods.html#all...
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/4/T041800.asp#T041803

Sometimes the only way to figure out if your child is sensitive to something is to completely remove that food from their diet for 2-4 weeks and then reintroduce it. Mild allergy symptoms can be masked, though the child can still be experiencing discomfort, and eliminating the food allows their system to heal. Then reintroducing the food will give a more accurate picture of whether your child is indeed sensitive or even allergic to the food.

And last, but certainly not least, when you say "but im gettin so stressed lately and feel like im yellin at everyone all the time because of the screaming and crying nonstop for no reason" -- I just wanted to say I really feel for you! If at all possible, try to take a little time to yourself to recharge your batteries, and that might be a 20 minute walk by yourself without screaming (yes, even out in the cold), or a nice shower without the kids, or grabbing a cup of tea with a good friend for some kid-free, adult conversation. A little recharging can really help us weather the intense and important needs of our babies (yes, even through all the screaming & toddler frustration!).

Hope some of this is helpful to you. Best of luck!

Such good advice below! I can vouch for the Signing Time videos. They are really great. The first few really stick to the basics that toddlers can learn quickly to show their wants and needs. I even liked them!

You might want to read about sensory issues. Sometimes a child can be over-stimulated or even under stimulated and that can cause them to cry more than normal. There are several great sites with lots of information about this. Don't be scared off by the word "disorder". Two of my children had sensory issues when they were toddlers and they are perfectly typical. I had never heard of it before but doing some of the activities they suggest really helped my children (and me!) back then.

http://www.kid-power.org/sid.html
https://mmm1106.verio-web.com/sensor/faq.html
and this book:
http://www.amazon.com/Out-Sync-Child-Recognizing-Integrat...

Best wishes.

Hello T.. Teaching your one year old Baby Sing Language sounds like a really good idea if you already know it. However, with a women as busy as you are, it doesn't seem like you would have the time to sit down and learn it and then have time to sit down and teach her while she is screaming. I also have four children and the older ones tend to torment the younger ones. I think sometimes they do things to watch the younger ones get into trouble. I would try to watch to see if she is getting the needs she has or her wants met. She might be screaming for attention and trying to be louder than the older ones. However, if she went through this stage as a baby she might have something wrong with her and I would definatly consult a Doctor for help right away. Best of wishes, I understand your pain.

I also had a child who cried alot. The first thing is to definately make sure there is nothing wrong with her. Have you thought about baby sign language? I started to teach my daughter sign baby sign language and I noticed that she stopped the crying as much. So your child may be very frustrated that she cannot communicate. If you chose to start sign language, just start with the basics: eat, drink, milk, more, mommy, daddy, sister, brother etc. It may take a little while for her to catch on, but hang in there. You can find the books at any book store, flash cards of the sign were also helpful.

Hi T.

Have you taken your little one to the MD. It sounds to me like she has an ear infection. My little boy cried alot for about a week..(he cried all day on a sat) and I took him to stat care..to find out he had double ear infections.
I also get stressed alot. (Although, I only have one child. Props to you for having 4 :)) I find that just getting out of the house works wonders. I push my son around the mall just to get some exersise. In your case with 4 tots, have you tried just going to the library? Maybe the kids could find some books and stay out of your hair for a while?
Good Luck
M.

T.,
It could be so many things...or it could be something so simple as she just misses you and wants more of your attention. First of all I would say to have her checked by her doctor, or your doctor or local county clinic. Make certain that there is not a physical ailment causing her pain or discomfort. Discuss your concerns with the doctor or nurse. I have seven children and I have had the same problem at least once or twice with each one. A few times it was teething, a few more it was ear infections, a few times it was just tantrums. But, it can never hurt to be safe and have someone check them out. I wish you all the best. God Bless you. J.