Okay this is an update to my friend's mom who is a "drama queen"...if you read the previous post - my girlfriend's mom is 72 years old and full of drama..she had a cyst removed from her ovary on the 12th which led to the discovery of cancer cells (not pre-cancerous thinking Stage 1 either)...we see this as a BLESSING!!! Because most times Ovarian Cancer is not caught until it's too late.
So she went to her OB/GYN on Friday for her 2 week follow up...another total blessing here - all of the markers indicate that they got ALL of the cancer (they ended up removing her lymph nodes and a radical hysterectomy) and now they OB/GYN is recommending chemo-therapy....
This is where I am confused...my girl friend and I are saying MOM - Go to the oncologist because they handle cancer issues...but the OB seems to think she can handle it...(this is bothersome to me and my girl friend) however, mom is saying "I don't know if I want to do chemo..."
OB is saying the chemo is pro-active and preventative....as ovarian cancer can be very vicious....
What is your take?
Do you feel it's preventative or pro-active or overkill? She's 72 years old, other than the cyst is in relatively good health (she does have a heart issue)...
Do you think she should go to the oncologist or stick with the OB/GYN?
THANK YOU!!!
Laurie - thank you!! YES!! It IS her choice....
Oncologist. More information for peace of mind
It is also like a second opinion..
But remember, it is her choice.
This is the time when different doctors who practice different disciplines need to work together. Forget the drama queen stuff. Pretend she is YOU. Think about what YOU would do in this situation. You have grown children who you would like to see have kids of their own or you would like to see your grandchildren grow up. Maybe watch them walk across the stage for their high school graduation (like my mom just did with my older son.)
She needs 2nd and 3rd opinions from oncologists, gastroenterologists, and gyns who SPECIALIZE in oncology with the reproductive system. She should have a colonoscopy done to make sure there isn't cancer in there before starting chemo.
There is NO REASON ON EARTH to not get these professionals together to help her decide on whether or not she should have chemo. Chemo IS a usual thing to do in this instance. But that doesn't mean that she should just jump in and do it. She needs all the options spelled out to her.
And yes, I have a friend who this happened to, in her mid 60's. Chemo was horrendous for her, but a year and a half later, she is still cancer free and still working. She ended up getting colon cancer after the cancer in her reproductive organs, so it IS very important to test the surrounding organs.
I hope your friend will get MANY opinions on this for her mother and put the team together, talking to each other, for the sake of this W..
And I hope that I see a little bit more kindness in the answers on this thread after the lack of kindness on the last thread. (My honest opinion.) (And for those of you privately asking which thread -
http://www.mamapedia.com/questions/850842010872119297)
Dawn
I 100% agree with Laurie!
As an RN myself, I am all about patient rights. Bottom line it is her choice.
Lori
Wow! If I'm reading this correctly, the surgery was done by the OB/GYN and not a GYN/Oncologist?? If they KNEW cancer cells were present, she should have also been in the care of the Gyn/Oncologist...othen times they will work in surgery with the OB/GYN and develop a treatment plan together.
How involved of a patient is she? Is she more of "ignorance is bliss"?
Cheryl, just to remind you that I work for a laboratory that does a blood test if there is a suspected ovarian mass, this is done prior to surgery to learn if is malignant and we then involve the Gyn/Oncologist.
I think she should get at least three opinions.
My papa is going to be 73 in November. He has had a few strokes and has made decisions as to how he wants to treat them. Mainly, he has refused the medication his doctors have prescribed. He's simply not willing. According to him, the medication makes his life unbearable. He'd rather treat himself and live fully - and if he goes he goes.
He is avidly against chemo as well, having watched his peers and his only living family (his brother) treat their cancer with chemo and spend their last days in pain from the chemo itself.
That's his opinion, his choice, his body and his life. It's not mine to determine. At this point, he doesn't go to the doctor but once a year.
My papa reads more books in one week than I do all year. He stays very informed. So, yes, information is power. That he stays informed makes it easier for me to stand back and not try to control his outcome. Regardless, the decision isn't mine unless it's my (or my young kid's) body.
Big prayers for your friend's health.
It is her choice...but MORE information is better than less information.
When my cousin had breast cancer her ob/gyn who diagnosed sent her to both an oncologist and a surgeon. The oncologist reviewed all the tests/biopsy information/etc etc and then came up with a treatment plan.
In my cousin's case leaving the cancer alone until her first round of chemo and radiation was advised to see if the chemo and/or radiation was even effective against it. Then the surgeon did her job of removing it.
My best friend (Maid of Honor in my wedding)'s mother died from ovarian cancer...it is not usually caught early and it is very vicious.
If it were me (granted I don't know all the details and am no medic by any means).... If it were me and I was 72 yrs old I'd rather have 1 more good year than 5 more awful years of chemo and doctors visits and all that junk.
This is a good question. My experience with cancer was with my Grandfather in law...he was told for 14 years that he just had arthritis and when his doctor retired and the new one came in and said "Mr. Smith, how do you want to continue to handle your bone cancer?" he lasted six months after that...his wife (Nana) knew he had cancer - but he had such a STRONG WILL that he could overcome arthritis...the mind is such a powerful thing...
It's her choice...however, I do believe that she MUST be informed...I don't think an OB/GYN would be the expert on this cancer...I would tell her to go to another OB/GYN as well and see at least two oncologists...
I hope she gets a lot of information and research...support is what she needs...drama queen or no - she will need support and knowledge!!!
She should definitely go to the oncologist who specializes in the treatment of cancer, the OB/GYN doesn't. The oncologist can then advise your friend's mom on what would be best for her (for one, chemo at her age could increase her chances for developing myelodyplasia, so it's best to get advice and recommendations from a specialist.)
And remember, in any event it's the mom's choice IF she has or doesn't have chemo.
I am sure the gynecologist knows what she is doing, and will refer her if the doctor feels like it's warranted. Also, make absolutely sure she does the chemo if that is what the doctor recommends. I have had two loved ones die in the last year from cancer. They also were told that they got all the cancer, but wanted it to be done as a preventative measure. They opted to not do the chemo from the onset, as the doctor recommended. Now they are both gone. I try not to think about how they both might possibly be alive right now if they had of just made a different decision and listened to the doctor.
I'd definitely encourage an oncologist visit. Why do chemo if they eradicated all the cancer already? My grandma was diagnosed with lung cancer at age 82..... the docs encouraged chemo to lengthen her life a bit longer, she didnt want it but my aunts all talked her into it. She died immediately after the first chemo session. fyi
