Can Any of You Help? Double Mastectomy Question

Get her a pair of the travel size pillows so that she can put them under her arms for support. Make sure you write down the amount of fluid from the drain (from each side) each time you empty them out and the color. If there is an odd odor this is possibility of infection and she will need to have that treated. If you can find a garter belt for her waist get two large safety pins and attach the drains to the belt so that they don't pull when she turns or moves or takes a shower.

Once she has healed they will set up her radiation schedule which is for 6 weeks five days a week at the same time each day. She will have a body fit for a form so that they can do the radiation treatment which is about 10 minutes.

Just be there for her and when she starts her radiation treatments go with her in case she is tired or doesn't feel up to driving herself home. Get the book from the oncology department about the radiation diet and follow it. It does include nuts, cream, butter and real whole foods to help with the radiation. But she will recover quicker by following the meal plan.

Have her contact the local American Cancer Society and get in touch with a Reach to Recovery person who can answer her questions and be a big sister to her in the time. Oh yes, she may feel like crying and she is entitled to it and she may lash out a bit at people close to her it is common but she will be alright. Get her a journal so that she can log her experiences as she goes through this journey in life.

My best to you and your family. Also her priorities in life will change and she will change in her outlook on many things but she will be fine.

The other S.
Breast Cancer Survior (14 years in Septermber)

while I was reading the other responses, a couple of things really jumped out at me:

the recliner: yes, she'll sleep better in one. BUT be prepared to manipulate it for her.....pulling on the handle OR pushing will be painful for her. Above all else, do not let her leave the footrest up....somebody will fall! Oh, & you might want to keep a bleached sheet on the chair to make it feel cleaner for her.

the bathroom: she may require assistance. (sorry ladies) Even wiping may be a painful movement for her. Be prepared & use lots of humor/kindness. You may find that those feminine/wet wipes are easier for her to use!

when my best friend went thru this, all of our friends kept food in the house. Trays of finger foods, fruit & vegies, & casseroles.

prayer chains are very important! Spread the word.....

& actually, now that I think of it, either you or your DH needs to go with her for the pre-surgery prep appointment....or ask your MIL for her packet of info so you all are on the same page & ready for this recovery period. My 23y.o. son went thru hip replacemnt last fall....& the info packet 100% prepared us for the entire process! I think this is your best bet.....I wish her a very speedy & successful recovery......

She will have drains coming out of her chest wall. She will be in a lot of pain. She will not be hungry. She will need to be propped up in bed. Also prop her arms both sides. Do give her the drugs that were prescribed, even if she doesn’t want them.
The drains are gross- but very important.
Prayers are on their way to you.
I am a breast cancer patient that has had a double and still doing plastic surgery’s.
Be there for her.

A friend of mine had one last fall. She needed help for a few weeks (but she had a 9 month old at the time). She was unable to lift things for at least 2-3 weeks.

Chemotherapy has been really hard for her too - is your MIL planning Chemo? If so, she may need additional help following her treatments as well.

My friend's family set up a website where people could sign up to bring meals, do laundry, childcare, etc.

I would suggest (with her blessing) talking to someone at her doctors office for some presurgical direction. Especially if one of you will be staying after surgery.

Good luck to your family.

J.

I am not really sure what will help her in this ... mental help is mostly needed in my opinion ... I did however like a movie that may help spirits in all of this ... "Why I Wore Lipstick to My Mastectomy" Sarah Chalke is the lead actress and I thought it was a good movie about the emotions one goes thru before during and after ... who knows it could help. Either way be ready for anything and know who you have around you and what their strengths are and play to everyone's strengths ... if you have an organizer, prayer warrior, cooker, listener etc ... and remember just breathe! My grandmother had hers long before I was born and she handled it by herself mostly so I can not share from my family's experience other than breathe, use everyone's strenghts and know you are only one woman.

It is hard to say how long she will need your help. Depends on her personality. Is she a fighter, go getter, active lady. If so, she probably will
not need you a long time. I would think tops would be two weeks. Makes
sure she eats well, stays hydrated and rests when she needs to. Just be
supportive. This is a rough time for her. Good luck and I will keep her in
my prayers.

I've taken care of my mom after a number of different surgeries - not a mastectomy though. but it's above the waist and so it won't affect her ability to use the bathroom. She will need pain management, assistance in prparing meals, cleaning and things like making the bed, getting dressed. Usually the insurance company will cover a nurse or aide visit a couple / few times after she comes home. Tell the hospital discharge planner or social worker that she'll need someone to stop in - they can help her bathe if needed, and check her drain, incision, etc.

As nother person wrote - if she's tough and willing to fight the good fight, she won't need much help.

Encourage her to take her pain medication and rest. Healing is quicker and more complete when the patient is not in pain. Something about pain causes certain stress hormones to be released that inhibit healing.

Good luck with you MIL - I've been assisting my mom thorugh 6 years of ovarian cancer and she's in her final illness now - but she's fought a valient fight and she's finally starting to slow down. You will be blessed by doing this - and your kids will see your example and learn by it. God bless you and your MIL!