Can a 3 Year Old See a Therapist?

Updated on September 21, 2009
K.G. asks from Fort Lauderdale, FL
4 answers

Hi Moms,

Unfortunately my mother (her 2 obnoxious pets) AND mother in law moved with my husband, son, and I 4 months ago.. It's been nothing but hell and my mother in law finally moved out (under bad terms) 2 weeks ago, THANK GOSH!!! ( financially they both needed our help)...My mom is moving out next week, THANK GOSH!!! We told them they both had to move out because our house was so stressful.. My mom and mother in law didn't get along and it was causing problems in our whole house(my mom was complaining to me and my husbands mom was complaining to him) (I could write for hours on how stressful this has been and how selfish both moms are). It's been nothing but BAD LUCK since they've gotten here (IE: my moms cat peed on and RUINED our leather sectional, peed on our area rug and runner and we had to toss that as well, cat peed in my son's playroom and we had to replace the carpet, our sink broke and we had to replace it, I have since become an insomniac and take xanax to sleep because my mind constantly goes at bedtime,etc etc etc etc.. I could go on and on and on)and unfortunately I think my "almost" 3 year old is stressed out..I have gotten into 4 blow up fights with my mom and he has told me he was scared. That TRULY broke my heart hearing that.. Prior to them moving in we never had any issues (my husband and I have a great relationship)...
In July my son was diagnosed with having herpes simplex 1 in his eye, ughhhh.... Since July he has gotten it now 4 times.... That is VERY odd to get it that much over such a short period of time.. My son is very pale skin with super blonde hair and very blue eyes. He is very sensitive to the sun and we thought it was reoccurring because of him being in the sun (sun can bring out herpes too.. It's just like a cold sore but he gets it around his eye). So I brought him to a dermatologist where they put him on a daily moisturizer with SPF in it and a special sunscreen...
Well just this morning he has the herpes bump back AGAIN!!!!!! He JUST got over it last week and the eye dr said last week if it happens again I have to now bring him to a hemotologist specialist to make sure there's nothing wrong with his immune system being his little body can't fight it. I don't think (KNOCK ON WOOD) there's anything wrong with his immune system because he's growing, eats fine, puts weight on, doesn't get anymore sick than the average kid.. He's not a sickly child.. What people are telling me is that he's stressed!!!!! I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOO devastated that all of these problems that have occurred since the moms have moved in might have caused something with him now. My question is: can a 3 year old even see a therapist, what do they even talk about to a "almost" 3 year old? I always read that there little personalities are set in place by the age of 3 and if this has affected him, I'm going to be so upset...
PS last weekend he was hitting himself in the face for no reason and hes NEVER done that before.. I can't tell the difference between a "normal" acting out kid and a kid that is having internal issues/stress with this house.

What can I do next?

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F.H.

answers from Boca Raton on

Try Bach Rescue Remedy. It's made from a blend of flower essences and helps with many emotional issues like stress and depression. I think I've seen a kid's version advertised in KIWI magazine. There are also homeopathic remedies and vitamins just for kids to help their immune systems. Go to Wholefoods, or any health food store hang out in the supplement section, and find some help.

I know some people think it's crazy, but you might want to search for a non-traditional "therapist". Someone who does Reiki, or is trained in healing and balancing the human energy field and chakras. I've known MANY kids who had emotional issues respond wonderfully to these therapies. To me, doping kids with pharmaceuticals sounds much crazier.

Take him to swim in the ocean, touch some dirt and start a gardening project, go for bike rides. Butterfly World is GREAT for relaxing (if he's not afraid of butterflies - duh). Get him a nice hat and try to get him to wear UV filtering sun glasses.

Lastly, you need to clear your home of negative energy. I think Wholefoods sells a type of sage incense for this purpose. They call it "smudging".

I wish you much peace and hope Banyan feels better soon.

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S.C.

answers from Boca Raton on

I have found that children are little antennas of our own emotions and of those in the home. That being said, you have been under tremndous stress yourself, so I would highly encourage you to see someone. Once you are more balanced and at peace, your child will be. I agree with the other Fernanda about seeking maybe someone who does energy balancing and/or healing in addition to a therapist. In my opinion, everyone can use some objective help at some point in their lives. You deserve it, and so does your little one.

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T.B.

answers from Boca Raton on

Perhaps once both Mom and MIL have moved out, the house will settle back down to its own renewed sense of calm and you won't need therapy? I hope that's the case... and that future recurrences of his eye flaring up stop.
I can relate... every time my Mom comes to visit... so does my eczema!
I like the suggestion of using sage in the house... a very symbollic new beginning to life going forward in your house (and you "reclaiming it") for your family of 3!
Good luck!

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P.B.

answers from Boca Raton on

Yes, but usually they want the parents to join the child. You might be able to find one through your faith community, if you have one. As for the herpes issue, my brother and I have found that if we are under stress, we tend to get cold sores (same virus). The best thing we have found for that is Lysine (an amino acid), I would imagine that if it is taken in tablet form (as opposed to an ointment) it would have the same benefits for your son's eyes. Hope this helps.

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