I have been planning an Athletic Booster Banquet since October, and things have gotten out of control. First, let me say that this project has been my "baby" since October; and since then no one has wanted to help. The original date for the banquet had been set for December 21; the day our children got out for Christmas break. Then in November my husbands' friend; the football coach offered to help. His wife decided she wanted to get involved as well. Due to unforseen circumstances; such as my grandmother's death we pushed the date back untill February 23. Well now the coaches' wife wants to take over and add things that I know the school would not approve of such as music. We are a Christian charter school and the superintendant has already said no music, period. Then she wanted to make the event formal when most of the families are single parent families trying to make a living and pay bills. I told her no, because some parents may not be able to afford it but if someone wanted to show up in formal dress they may do so. My problem is I have talked to this woman and been very kind in the way I word things to make her understand. Her husband gets it, so does mine. I think she and I have a problem because she's 25 and very nieve; she wants to force parents to help by making them feel guilty. Her husband, my husband, and I are in our 30's and we get along well, we usually are on the same page and when we are not we discuss it further. When she does not get her way she resorts to cussing, fighting with her husband, (last time she hit him on his unmentionables and made him sleep on the couch, she proudly announced that at a Christmas dinner sponsored by my huband and I.) What should I do? I love volunteering but she's out of control, makes me want to quit.
Thank you all for the advice, if you have more let me know. I talked to the Principal about music, and he said their will be no music period. I asked him to convey the message to the other volunteer. He said he would. I also talked to my best friend, the President of P.T.O., she told me she has heard that the other volunteer may cost her husband his reputation for her high handed tactics. I feel bad for the husband, because we run a BBQ catering service toghether I don't want to ruin our relationship, and my husband is his best friend. I gave her the authority to pick where we have the event, decorations, and set up to keep her busy. She asked if she could do more, I told her to canvass the near by towns to sell tickets. That should keep her busy.
Thank her for ideas, and make it clear that the superintendant set guidelines to follow with no exception to the music, & you have no authority to change it ! As for the formality, maybe comprimise, maybe Sunday dress? Or let her know, though it's a nice idea, we want all attendees to feel comfortable. Or maybe she just wants to here it from the superintendant.
Good Luck!
I would just lay it out for her. Tell her you appreciate her enthusiasm and let her know THIS is how the banquet is going to go (theme, food, etc...) and give her a specific task to take care of that doesn't call for her to give her two cents. If you've already made up flyers, for instance, have her mail them out. And let her know if she isn't on board with your plan, then she can volunteer for another event. Just be "point blank" and upfront with her. Seems that might be the only way to talk to her. Good luck.
C.,
You have tried and tried to tell her about the issues, policies, and wanting her to consider other peoples finacial status but it sounds like she just doesn't want to listen so politely excuse her from volunteering on this project, mybe she can run her own thing involving another event. Explain if she can't follow your plans she can hit the road...
