Bizzare Car Seat Behavior

I would try to not pay attention because the more you react the more she will do it. My car seat has a large padded circle that protects the child's legs and tummy from being pinched in the buckles, I would try padding the strap maybe the change would throw her off, and maybe it would prevent her for making herself bleed. I would also talk to my Dr for ideas I know it makes you feel embarrassed but it is really best if you can learn how to be matter of fact about sexuality and not ashamed.
Best of luck.
A.

Hi A.S.,

Know that your daughter is not the only one that does this. Just recently, I was asked to find some information for a parent in a program to which I consult...3 yr. old child did this...and had done so since she was younger. Basically, your daughther has discovered that the motion feels good...it may calm her...keep her occupied...and may well become a habit when constrained in her seat. Go to your browser and type in "young children AND masturbation" and you will find several articles written by physicians on the topic. Ignoring the behavior and not making a big deal out of it is best, while you can. As she grows and if she continues to do it (after 4 yrs), you can explain to her that our private bodies belong to us and that we do not touch them or rub them on other things while other people are around. You can acknowledge that this feels good to her, but it really is not something to do around other people. Keep it simple. At this age, she would not understand this. Think of this behavior as similar to nose-picking...not socially acceptable, but lots of kids do it. If you cannot find a helpful article, please email me and I will find the link for you that I shared with another parent. Most of all, don't panic and don't respond to your dtr in disgust or anger.

Good luck!

W....mom of 3

www.kidlutions.com

PS...Do not be embarrassed to tell your pediatrician anything! He/she has heard it all...and they will NOT be alarmed or weirded out. This is a mild thing compared to other things they hear...REALLY!

Hi
I don't have any advice about your actuall question but annie told you to padd the strap and maybe she would stop I just wanted you to know if you do that your daughter will not be safe in her carseat if you where to get into a accident. You should NEVER add anything to your carseat that was not included when you bought it. Good Luck in figuring out how to stop the behavior. T.

Hi there -
I know my friends' dtr used to have her own pillow or blankie to "groove on" . . . my friend was so embarrassed - not b/c of the actual act, more because of when and where she'd do this. My friend helped babysit my dtr while I worked PT and it seemed to be quite a routine (almost every time I was picking my dtr up) and when my friend was in the middle of chatting with me. My friend primarily focused on "where" it is ok to do this behavior - in her own bedroom. I know this behavior started early on - maybe around 12 months. She is now 5 and has been a lot better being more private. It is totally normal - as stated in many child dev't classes that I've taken. I know my friends' dtr would do this behavior around nap times, quiet times/watching TV, and bedtimes. I'm assuming it because it's a way to soothe herself and calm down. My dtr has not shown much of this behavior but I know I've had to work with her on using better coping stategies too. She tends to whine a lot and have tantrums (where you can't reason with her). So, as your dtr matures - you could maybe try teaching her different ways to calm herself, de-stress, and just cope with situations that are more positive in a public setting as well as at home.
As far as the car seat - I know the style of carseats that I've had - had a way to move the middle part either closer to them (when they are younger) or farther away the bigger they got. Maybe you already have made the change - but, check under the padding/fabric to see if there is some room for growth.
Your pediatrician should never make you feel uncomfortable. Don't be afraid to just ask questions. If you don't get the right response or don't feel good rapport with your ped, I'd find a new one.

I, too, thought of yeast infection first. Then urinary tract infection. Feel free to be frank with your pediatrician. They have probably seen everything!!

I have not experienced this personally, but I would completely ignore it. Your attempts to distract her and deter her are not working. Ignore it, and yes, eventually it will stop.

I'm sure seeing the blood was shocking, but she really can not do great harm to herself by doing this. If she compains that she is sore again, point out to her WHY she is sore.

Also, see if you can pinpoint how long it typically takes before she starts doing this. If you are going to be in the car for any length of time, pull over BEFORE she starts doing this and get her out of the carseat for awhile. Yes, you may be pulling over more than you'd like, but there's no getting anywhere fast when you have small kids.

My son has never been one to enjoy sitting in a stroller or carseat for great lengths of time. I don't blame him--I wouldn't want to be strapped to a chair for hours on end. We give him as many breaks as we can.

Good luck.

Hi A S,

The first thing that popped into my head was...maybe she has yeast infection. I know you said you were embarrassed to say something to your pediatrician, but you might want to check this possibility out the next time you go in for a check-up....or sooner if you won't be going for awhile.

C.

I don't know if you ever considered something going on with her vaginal area? Whether it be a yeast infection, or UTI? When I was a little girl I had UTI's all the time and my mom had said I would do similar things; the younger girls are the urethra sits more horizontal than vertical and sometimes bacteria have an easier time getting and staying in...I don't know at what point that gets better but something worth looking into.

Dear AS

she might have a yeast infection and is trying to scratch, just a thought, poor thing! Sometimes they have yeast but don't show any outward signs! Mother to 4! Best of luck to you!! Does she have a coated tongue? That too is a sign of yeast overgrowth

Tracey

My two boys started reaching for their penises during diaper changes (and now, for my four year old, even during stress) as soon as they were able to use their hands intentionally! If it's ok and socially acceptable for us to see that in boys, it doesn't need to be an embarrassment for girls. I'd say perfectly natural, although the blood would bother me, too. Was SHE bothered by it (in pain)? I know for my boys, a gentle but QUICK reminder works better than me getting frustrated...they just seem to make it a game then, and then I DO wind up embarrassed in public! Quickly moving their hands seems to make the issue smaller--not sure how to do that in a carseat, but at least I wanted to say it sounds 100% normal to me!

My daughter did the exact same thing and started around 2-3. I researched what to do and ignored it until I could talk to her about it when she got older. She called it her "exercises that feel good" . Also, I know someone that worked at a child care center who said many kids did this at nap time and other times so -yes it is common. You've got some great advice from others, I just wanted to let you know there are others out there.

Is she kind of rocking back and forth? Does she almost hold her breath to an extent when she is doing this?

E.

If it is a yeast infection or bacterial infection you will definitely need to speak with your doctor to get rid of it. Afterward you might try giving your daughter yogurt regularly.I used to get bacterial infections a lot and have found eating yogurt is a great way to prevent them!

As others have said it could be that she just likes the feeling/motion of the act. As a primary school teacher, we have seen this behavior a lot in young children.