Bedwetting Issues for My Two Boys

hello H.,
you may want to at first cut off all liquids at about 6pm and if they want a drink then let them have a tablespoon of water, then at about midnight or so go wake them up and make them go to the rest room. We did this for my nephew because the doctor told us that his bladder may not be growing right with his body. It helped after about a week and a half he started to get up on his own going to the bathroom and didnt pee the bed.

I have been there and this is so difficult. I agree with the advice that youshould have him strip the bed and wash the sheets. It isn't a punishment, just a consequence. Mom can't keep track of it so you will have to. You can help him remake it when clean. They can't help it, so don't make them feel bad. The alarm might work. My son wet the bed last month and he is 16. He did strip the bed and wash the sheets because he was mortified. It is something he has to grow past and you can only help him so much. They are very heavy sleepers and the bed is warm once they wet it its too late. We did do some self talk about waking up dry and that helped a little. Good luck, it will sort itself out in time.

I am having the same issues w/my 6and half yo. He is such a havey sleeper u just cant wake him to go. My oldest(who is 10yo now)finally stopped when he was 6 and half. Damian(my 6.5yo)is so over wearing the Underjams. He knows thought he has to wear them so at nite when we r getting ready for bed i am always saying things like"now lets try to wake up dry". Sometimes he does and most of the time he doesnt. I wish i had some awsome advice for u but if u find anything that works please let me know...

I remember my brother had the same issue. It did not stop until my mother discovered he had a milk allergy/ After he stopped drinking milk so did his bedwetting. Go figure. My son had the same issue but I only gave him yogurt and some ice cream once in a while; well when ever he had some diary he would wet the bed. Never failed. try and see what happens. Rice Dream is a great replacement.

My daughter was 7 before she slept dry even though she had been potty trained at 2. My 7 yo & 5yo sons both still wet the bed. It is hereditary on my husband's side & my dr. said that we just have to wait until they grow out of it. With my daughter I tried the bed alarm (she slept through it), waking her up through the night--nothing changed. She was such a heavy sleeper that I could go into her room & turn on the light & clean it up & she slept right through everything. She simply had to grow out of it. My dr. offered the medicine for when she had sleep overs & didn't want to be embarrassed. I keep both my boys in Goodnights. I would never want to deal with all that laundry. Plus it's just gross to have them sleeping on pee'd in sheets. Nobody wants to wet the bed. It sounds like you all made this unrealistic decision & now you're still trying to stick with it & it's making you angry every day. I don't understand why you wouldn't go back to Goodnites. The extra expense & work from having to wash sheets every day definitely balances out the cost of the Goodnites. I think having them strip their bed & wash the sheets everyday is a punishment. They can't help it. Would you feel better if they were sad every morning & it started to lower their self confidence? Get the Goodnites & some wet wipes & let them take care of it that way. Then you don't have to be involved & it is not a constant source of conflict

Hi H.,

As a mother of four boys, I wish I had known what to do with my older ones before the 3rd one came along and somebody told me how to "fix" them. I was taking the boys to the bathroom every night around midnight and they still were wetting the bed most nights. Finally a new peditrician told me by me taking them, I was not disturbing their sleep. She told me to wake them up before I went to bed and then around 4 or 5 when they were in their deepest sleep and make them walk to the bathroom and go. It was so hard to do at first, but by the end of the week, they woke up easier and with the exception of a few accidents, they really did not wet the bed after that. I also used positive reinforcements such as stickers for every night dry on a calendar. I made it easier for them in the beginning. After 3 in one week (the wake up week) then 5 in a row the next week, with a bigger "prize". After 4 weeks in a row with 5 stickers in a row, they got to go to toys r us and pick out a $25.00 prize. One getting to do that really inspired the other two. (yes I brought them with us to pick out the toys as an incentive!)
Hope this works, I also limit the amount of liquid after dinner and make sure they are getting enough sleep each night so they are not so tired.

my childred went thorugh the same thing. they had to have their warm milk at bedtime. i had to change up the routine. nothing to drink after 7:30-8:00 pm. Their bedtime was 8:00. i would give them their milk around 7:15. then i would make them brush teeth, read a book or finish the end of a show, then go to the bathroom. i had to go as far as standing outside the door to make sure they were going because my youngest said she would but really didn't. i always knew because she would wet the bed. when i knew they had both went, they slept through the night without wetting the bed. i would just play with the times of giving them drinks before bed. maybe cut them off a little earlier. then make them try to "potty" whether they think they have to or not. (we all know even we don't 'feel' it, if we try, we can still go). just be sure it's the very last thing they do before bed. i do think this will help but i do belive mostly they will outgrow it. i had to use pull ups later than most. my daughters friend who is 8 still uses them. maybe go back to them for a while until you can pin point what works. i don't think theres anything wrong with that. good luck!

Hello, I know where you are coming from. My 12 year old step son wets the bed every night! We used goodnites but he wet right through them so we tried Depends. Still he wet through those as well. We tried EVERYTHING people suggest and NOTHING worked because he is such a heavy sleeper. Just so you understand what we went through he would soak the depends and entire King size bed head to toe and side to side. No dry spot anywhere. He hated it more than my husband and I did. When he was 8 the doctor told us that this is more common than I realized and not to worry. I wished I would have ignored the doctor at that time but wanting to give my step son every advantage before medication we listened to the doctor. He also has ADHD, which bedwetting can be a side to ADHD. The doctor put him on Concerta for ADHD which should have elimininated the bedwetting but it did not. When he turned 12 enough was enough and the doctor finally said yes medication is what was left for us to do. He is now on DDAVP and a very happy child. We stop the medication every 2 months for 1 week to see if his bladder has matured but at this time it has not. Since his mother did not stop until she was 17, he may not stop until 17 but at least we have the medication to make it a better situation for him. Our water bill dropped $45 each month since he has been on the medication. Less laundry and showers. Only you will know what is best for your child. Take all the advice and then decide what would be best. I know what you are going through and empathize with you. My daughter is 8 and she still wets once in a while so I understand having 2 children with the situation. Best of Luck!

I do not have any real advice just a little support. My son is eleven (11) has never even worn goodnites and still wets himself. His sister 7 neverhad this problem. I had to buy him a new mattress because he has ruined it to the point the cats think its their litter box. I too have taken him to the doctor and they told me it was normal. (He does sleep like a rock.) So it has been a battle and the only thing I have been able to use to curb his problem is that I don't give him anything to drink past 7pm (he goes to sleep at 9p) That still doesn't promise he won't urine for the night. My doctor said they may have to give him medication but I really don't want to. My frustration is that he is being lazy but what I will say to you is that we have to be empathetic and try not to be mean about the situation and work with them. I am still battling my issue. I just wanted to show a little support because I also wondered who else has to deal with this problem. Another resource you can use is www.cafemom.com they have great resources like mamasource they may have some other answers for you.

Hello. I have three kids and my oldest now 10 finally stopped bed wetting but we do have the rare occasions. She is a heavy sleeper and my husband apparently is one too and he had accidents up until he was 15 years old when he finally stopped! How did we handle our daughter? My husband did not like the Goodnites so I put a plastic cover over the mattress and every time she wet the bed, she had to wash her bed covers and pj's. She didn't like the smell but our rule was since she was the one who had the accident, she had to be responsible for her accidents. We did not make a big deal about it because - she had to outgrow it and there is no way to stop that unless you use methods that I heard of soft electrical shocks, medication, etc. and we did not want to go down that road. We survived and so will you. But it does make them more aware and I think somewhere in their subconscious after having to wash their bedding many times it will sink in. In this case, patience is a virtue. So for your peace of mind if they don't mind the goodnites, keep using them. Good luck - it will end!

I don't know much about that issue but my niece used "Goodnights" unitl she was about 13. I think they can't do anything about it. You might just have to wait until their body is ready for it. My guess is they don't want to wet the bed so if they could help it, they would.

I have the exact same problem with my almost 6 year old son. I don't have any advise just support. Good luck I am hoping that you get the help you are looking for.

I had four boys two of whom were bed wetters. One of them was about twelve or thirteen when it finally stopped. It is most definitely hereditary and those alarms can help. There is one that vibrates that I would say may work better than those that make noise, especially if they are heavy sleepers. I also noticed that they wet in the morning, usually after three or four. Stay positive and just be matter of fact about it, it is as hard for them as it is for you.

I can say that I have been luck so far. My son was potty trained shortly before his 3rd birthday. I started weaning him from his nighttime cup of milk about 3 weeks ago. I still put him in overnight pullups for the the first 2 weeks for fear of accidents. When he did stay in his room all night, I didn't want to worry about waking him up or him waking up in a wet bed. Now when we started this 3 weeks ago, I cut his liquids 1 hour before bedtime. I have him go potty before his bath and again if he needs to before he lays down. He woke up dry, everyday, but once, so I've been putting him in underwear for the last week and he's still waking up dry. I have him go potty as soon as I wake up particularly because I'm waking up and finding him in my bed (without a mattress cover)! I would definitely invest in some mattress covers and I wouldn't go back to pullups for night time. I would cut the liquids earlier and get them up at least once at night.

This has been a constant topic on Mamasource--do a search and check out past postings to other moms' questions about older kids and bedwetting.

One solution that comes up a lot, and sounds like it might be the answer for your older son, is a bedwetting alarm that senses the first hint of moisture in a child's underwear and gently wakes the child immediately, so he has time to get to the toilet. Other postings have mentioned brand names of these. I'm a little surprised that since your son is as old as eight, your doctor hasn't at least mentioned trying an alarm.

Of course, it isn't unusual for older kids to still wet the bed, of course, and it's a physical issue, not a behavior issue(as in "I'm going to be naughty and wet the bed" thing). Their bodies are still developing for a long time to come. I know other moms will come up with good suggestions about curbing the wetting or living through it. One thought that occurred to me, though: At their ages, your sons are old enough to strip their own beds and get their sheets etc. all the way into the washer each time the beds are wet. I would have them do this NOT as a punishment--don't make them feel guilty or like they're being punished for wetting--but clearly as a way just to ensure they know this is a responsibility of theirs. It might help with the "they just don't care that they're wetting" issue. Just be matter-of-fact about it when you tell them you have a new routine for the whole family. If it's middle-of-the-night wetting of course you don't expect them to haul stuff to the washer then, but the next a.m. they should as a matter of routine get everything out and into the washer. This might give them a sense of wanting more to work with you on bed-wetting, especially the older child.

Purchase a Vinyl cover for the matress. They sell them at Wallmart for around $20 bucks you zip them over the entire thing. There a little easier than the matress cover/pad type because you can spray them with a little 409 and wipe them down.
Next time your boys wet the bed have THEM strip the bed and put them in the wash and dryer (with a little help if needed and a little supervision) and remake their own bed. They are old enough to be responsible for their actions in this case. Especially if you think they just don't care. I think they will soon grow tired of washing the sheets as you do.

Also, you might try setting a potty alarm in the middle of the night for them, when the alarm goes off they get up and go potty at least until they get used to waking up automatically.

Best of luck

I know how hard and frustrating this can be. You want so much for your boys to be "normal". All you can do is be patient, keep using the Goodnites and let their little bodies develop. Listen to your pediatrician--your children are not doing this on purpose. It's most often hereditary--have you asked your husband if he also had the issue (or another male in his family)? In my family it runs in the males--my son at 8, is only now able to make it all night. The change is dramatic and you will see it happen almost overnight. Your kids will be so proud when they can make it all night! Hang in there.

My first comment is i was trained when i was little and a few years later i started again and i believe it was stress related. But it's not always my father also wet the bed. I wet the bed until i was 12yrs old. Which happens to also be the age where doctors start worrying. My suggestions... First get the covers for the bed that are washable you can get them at walmart but i got mine for my daughter at sears it's made better than the one i got at walmart and lasted longer. With this it's soft and not plastic so you don't need a sheet also this works alone. Next i would require the children to take off their own sheets or what ever is wet off their bed. My mother did with me, so if they just don't care they will start caring more if they have to touch the wet sheets. (Make it not something they want to do so you will get over the not caring more quickly) Next don't cut down on water at night. What finally got my daughter over her prob. is i actually filled her up at night. If you only have to go the the bathroom a little it might not wake you up but if you have to go REALLY bad it will normally wake you up.
I wouldn't suggest you do any duties as far as taking off the beds or what not let them. It's their prob not yours. The 8yr old can even wash his own sheets as well. (I could at that age)