Bed Wetting, and Child Who Hates to Poop

Not sure about the pooping; however, the bet wetting can be related to emotional issues--see if you can do some investigating about her relationships with other kids, siblings, etc...the pediatrician may have some helpful info., yet may or may not believe in a relationship to an emotional issue. You can refuse tests if you don't think they are necessary as well as get second and third opinions. Also, don't be afraid to talk with your daughter even about talking to the pediatrician--you're right, this might be embarrassing for her.
Good luck.

Hi P.-
I agree with another of the moms.....MIRALAX is wonderful!! You can get it over the counter but is a little pricey. I have our pediatrician prescribe it because you can get a huge bottle of generic for your generic co-pay amount. (mine is $10.00). There is NO taste--no coloring--my son doesn't even know I put it in water. I just told him that the Dr. said drinking 8 oz of water at bedtime will help keep in "regular". So I have him head up....I mix the powder until completely dissolved and he thinks he is just drinking water. (could do in anything--juice, whatever). Another thing we did was start a "contest" between my son and my husband. I would mix my sons miralax water and then put 8 oz of regular water in a glass for my husband and then they would "race" to see who could drink it faster. Of course my husband always lets him win :o) GOOD LUCK!!

Talk to your pediatrician about both children. Your daughter could have problems with her kidneys or have a bladder infection or are there changes in your home life that is causing her stress? Does she urinate during the day on a regular basis or does she "hold it" a lot? Is she afraid of waking up in the middle of the night to go or do you have a nightlight to guide the way to the bathroom? Usually, by 7 years old, their bodies are maturing enough to be able to relieve themselves. I still would see a dr. if this continues.

As far as your son is concerned - is there enough fruit and fiber in his diet? Is he a healthy eater? Does he eat a lot of cheese/pizza that could cause constipation? Is he getting a lot of sugary pops, cereals, snacks and candy throughout the day. Evaluate his diet. If he is 10 years old and hates to go to the bathroom - who wouldn't if they were always constipated? As far as the competitive thing....by changing his diet, he may have great success with going to the bathroom but....check with his pediatrician - new or not - these are issues that you should address with him. Good luck!

While the underlying issues may very well be medically related, I think it would be beneficial for you to bring your children to a behavioral specialist. It is telling that both children are older and both are having issues with control. Children often feel out of control and BM and urine are clearly a big area that they are in control of. I know this is a vulnerable thing to suggest;but, I have their best interest at heart and I can't imagine this is an easy topic at their age and around their peers. Why not take both the medical route along with the behavioral route.
Wishing you well.

Hi,

If he has some sensory issues, he may just hate the feeling of having a bm or hate the wiping thing. My son has a bathroom issue as far he won't go ANYWHERE in a public bathroom unless it's small and looks like a home bathroom. He also won't have a bm anywhere except our home or family members. He will hold his movements (pee also) until he's ready to burst. We have to cut many things short b/c we have to go home for him to go to the bathroom. He is also 10 years old and his problem is that he doesn't like the automatic flushes in public bathrooms. Even when we told him that there isn't one in that particular bathroom, he's afraid that someone will come in and flush (too loud). What I'm trying to say is that it may be a sensory issue. Good luck because I'm still working on mine. Please keep us posted.

I can comment on the 7 yr old wetting the bed. This could be because of dairy at night. The lactoce in it can be causing the problem. Or it could be a normal growth spurt as you said. When she does wet the bed does she complain about anything hurting the next day? If so, you might want to have her checked out for a urinary track infection. If not, I would not worry too much about it. It sounds likes you are doing it all right.

Hello. Regarding the bowel movement issue, my daughter had a similar issue. We tried everything, she is vegetarian and her diet is stellar (we also tried adding fiber but that made no help). It became a vicious cycle to where she would clog toilets and hold it as it was so painful. We were afraid of her getting a fissure tear. She didn't want to go and t his went on until she began Miralax. She has been on it for several years, we put it in her juice once a day, and just don't have issues with it anymore unless we hold down on the Miralax. We started off by seeing her pediatrician who referred us to a Gastroenterologist (which greatly helped). Good luck.
T.

Hi--I'm only responding to the 10 year old and talking to his doctor. I would say absolutely because he/she should help, but I wouldn't do it in front of your child. Not sure your physician's set up, but with mine, there are nurse practitioners who you might be able to have a phone consultation with (same with Doctor) or once, with our son, I set up an appointment with his doctor to go without my child--it was still considered a medical appointment for the child, but it was a chance for me to discuss behavioral issues (I think he was hitting me and having temper tantrums at 5). A good pediatrician is interested in all aspects of health and development for your child--who knows, maybe there's something weird at school and he doesn't like to go there or other underlying problems, and the behavior is just the result.

Regarding the bed-wetting, I also agree that you should speak with the pediatrician. Do you work at night? (that seems to frequently be a factor). One of my friends discovered on her own that her child was intolerant of the red dye in Cool Aid. Every time that child had red Cool Aid, the bed-wetting occurred. When she eliminated it, the bed-wetting stopped. I hope yours will be as simple of a solution. With regard to the BM issue of your son, I definitely think this should be discussed with your pediatrician. As one of the other moms suggested, you can call and discuss things with the nurse ahead of time and the doc has a "heads up" prior to the visit. Then, it can just naturally be addressed as a part of the visit. The child doesn't have to know that you mentioned it. Good luck to you.

Don't assume there are no medical issues. I know someone whose boy had a kidney infection and that was why he wet the bed. They had assumed it was an emotional issue.They put off having it checked by the doctor way too long and it almost became serious.

NEVER BE EMBARRESSED TO ASK ANY QUESTION OF THE DOCTOR. NEVER PUT YOUR CHILDREN'S HEALTH [PHYSICALLY & MENTALLY[ AT RISK. YOU WILL NEVER KNOW A QUARTER OF WHAT HE KNOWS ABOUT MEDICINE. REMEBER HE SEE HUNDREDS OF CHILDREN IN HIS PRACTICE AND HAS OTHER SPECIALIST AVAILABLE FOR CONSULTATIONS IF AN OCCASION CALLS FOR ONE.
Call your pediatricain and make seperate appointments for each child and only take the one child in with you for their own appontment. The sibling should not be in there. Be blunt with the doctor about the child's problems,what you have tried and tell him about your concerns/feelings about how it is or may be affecting your child's feelings. A good pediatrician will talk directly to your children asking them questions and answering any questions they may have. He will decide then what action need to be done if any. He will point out to you and your child what steps need to be taken if any. Your children must know that they can confide in their doctor about anything. Our pediatrician has always talked directly to my kids(ages 16 &12). They will ask him any kind of question (even about problems with school work and friends) and answer any question he would ask. Children (even adults) must learn that the doctor is there to help them have a healthy happy life, but the doctor cannot do it unless patients are upfront and honest with their doctors on what is going on not only with their body, but also in their life. Never take anything for chance. My son (ADHD, a speech and auditory impairment) has the problem you son has. My son and his pediatrician have brought the problem under control. My son knows what he must do and knows that his pediatrician wants whats best for him in order to have a healthy happy life. One thing to remember. Never discuss your childrens problems with others. You do not want it to get back to the children. If you are married do not dicussit infront of the kids. Do it in private when you know the kids are not in ear shot. As for your daughter it may or may not be due to drinking too much before bedtime, a small bladder, another minor problem or a major issue. A good mon is a smart mom who talks to her pediatrician about anything going on in her children's lives.

To be honest, I think you have a bigger issues than you think. I think it is medical issues with both . It hink you have food allergies tht can cause teh bed wetting. I also think that the sensory stuff your son is experienceing has to do with the pooping. I know that children with processing issues have trouble with the pooing and peeign thing at times too. I am not one for myrlax but I think if you use it religiously for a month you can get him under more control and less embarraing for both sides especially at 10 years old. Were your kids born early at all? Do they have any food allergies? There is a great thing that beeps or buzzes your daughter at night time and that has worked with MANY people. they call it the potty pager. I guess try that first and then if that doesnt work you need to tell the dr.
good luck
J.

Regarding your 7 year old who wets the bed:
I have a similar situation with my 7 year old son. Just this past week, we've been waking him before we go to bed at night so he can pee. It's been keeping him dry. I would limit drinks before bedtime as long as your daughter feels comfortable doing so. I know my son wants to be dry at night. I'm sure your daughter feels the same. If she is tired of waiting to be dry, then you may see a urologist (that is what my pediatrician told me). Otherwise, just try simple steps at home and be patient - she will outgrow this.

It's all about nutrition, or lack of....

Bedwetting, more times than not is related to sugar intake.
Much like an alcoholic, when they drink they lose control of their muscles and they can't walk in a straight line
When they drink the alcohol turns into sugar. The same thing happen to children and it can effect their bladder.
Most mom's get defensive at this point and tell me the don't give their kids sugar. What about bread, pasta, mac & cheese, fruit juice, even too much fruite These all convert to sugar, and thus the muscles just don't work as well as they could. Too much sugar leads to B-complex deficiencies. Evaluate the diet, change what is needed and add a complete and balanced B-complex vitamin. If you don't know of one, or don't what to look for when it comes to balance, then reply back.
Going through the cabinets and getting rid of a lot of processed foods will help both the kids. I would do whole foods in order to add the fiber. INstead of apple juice, eat a whole apple with the skin. No white sugar, no white flour. Whole grains, organic soy milk because dairy and cheese tends to constipate. With the proper food intake, the poop will be a better consistency and he won't be able to hold it in. I know of an herbal product that just softens the stool and causes the colon to create the action in order to rid of the waste.

Both will benefit from the change. With both of them having similar but different problems, they are most likely reacting to the same cause or deficiency in their own way. If you need more help and some guidance, please let me know, I would be happy to pass along some other ideas.
They won't like the change, they will gripe about it, but as parents it is our job to give them the proper guidance and teach them to make good choices.

I also found that when they are going through a growth spurt my kids will have an accident. But they stop at around age 5-6. If she is urinating more during the day and frequently wetting at night where she was fine before it may indicate a medical issue. As for your son at ten having difficulty with his bms. I would discuss it with your pediatrician. He/She may have some tricks to help him and to perhaps see a developmental specialist that could help you determine if because of his other challenges this is common and what you can do to help him with it.

I would take the 10 year old boy to the doctor and pursue it that way. He's 10 and this is definitely an issue that is important and needs to be resolved soon. For your daughter, there are some great ideas from other moms for you to try. I would suggest limiting liquids much sooner than 1 hour before bed - I would cut them out several hours before bed. My stepson (8 years old) will wet occasionally and if he stops his liquids just after dinner, then he almost always stays dry.