HELP ME PLEASE!!!!!My 5 year old borderline autistic son screams and thrashes around in the car every time we come to a stop. It actually starts as soon as the driver starts to hit the brake. He has now gotten to the point I fear him hurting himself. I have tried playing childrens songs and that does not work.
My son is 2 and autistic.. He does this same thing, except it's when we back up. He freaks! There's not much you can do when you're driving, but once we start moving I reach behind and massage his legs while I'm driving with one hand and "shhsh" him and tell him "honey it's okay". Seems to work.
I don't know how to better the situation, really.
Just wanted to tell you you aren't alone.
I think I have an understanding of what you are going thru. My son is 4 1/2 and also autistic. He LOVES car rides, the longer more scenic the better. We recently have been searching to buy some property and have been doing alot of driving around. He loves it! However whenever we would stop to look at a property he would start the annoying whine like cry, I don't know how to fix it, I just wanted to sympathize with ya
My daughter has Autism and we have found her occupational therapist to be of great help in the past with car riding issues. Is your son in any type of therapy? Our daughter needs lots of deep pressure so to calm her in the car she would ride with a stack of heavy blankes on her lap. On long trips we would wedge a cheap plastic playground ball in between her seat and the one in front of her so that she could push against it with her feet when she needed to. Maybe it is the vibration of the car that your son needs and when you slow down that vibration frequency slows? I know that some Pack & Play portable baby cribs come with a battery operated attachment that vibrates the crib. Maybe there is something on the market that you could use to keep his seat at a constant vibration level. I am not surprised that the music does not help since that is auditory stimulation and probably not what he is needing. I hope that helps!
Our son is 3 and on the spectrum - since birth pretty much he has cried when we are at a red light - for awhile he didn't do it at all anymore, but lately if he is tired or bored in the car he is again. We haven't found a solution, but I can relate!
Hi T., I see you have gotten alot of good advice, I just wanted to tell you I have a daughter who also has autism and what Ive found that works well in the car is a portable DVD player, I think if she has something to focus on she doesnt notice shes in the car. I hope this helps I know how hard it can be espesally dealing with all of this all by yourself. I hope this helps, A.
I have an autistic son who is now 17. When he was little he had problems with certain sounds. We ended up taking him and having a test done. It wasn't to see if he could hear, but how he heard things. As it turned out, certain sounds caused him physical pain. (public toilets flushing, my voice, certain car sounds). So we had him go through a therapy called Audio Integration Training, (AIT). There was a lady in South Bend that did it. (Sharon Hurst) We saw such HUGE results that were so positive, including speach, cognitive development. The down side is, the therapy is expensive, but It was the lifeline for us. Otherwise I would suggest his own personal mp3 or something like that with earbuds or a headset that will tune out more sounds and cause the music to be more than white noise. For us, the AIT helped with so many things. Good luck.
Hi T..
My son was diagnosed with autism on August 9th, 2001. He was overloaded by everything and I had to carry him around every where we went outside the house (I wish I had discovered slings back then!!).
Anyway - Now he carries around small comfort toys like little small action figure men or an arm from Mr. Potato Head or odd items such as a thimble or a piece of string. In the beginnng it was me and then his blanket and stuffed puppy, then just the puppy, then a hat he wore 24/7, including bath and night time and finally the small comfort items I mentioned and now he can put them in his backpack or pocket while at school.
I hope you can find something that works for your little guy.
Hi. I have twin boys, now six, on the spectrum. My younger one, Jake, did the same thing. We started by getting sitters for a while so we could figure out the problem. We also used homeopathy to help heal him and so we talked to his homeopath (I am studying to be a practitioner if you decide to go that route) and found things to help him. If finally got to a point he REALLY wanted to go somewhere with us, so we told him he was not allowed to scream. If he screamed, kicked, or anything, we would turn around and go home. He is better now. He still whimpers and asks us to go another way, but he knows he won't get to go anywhere if he doesn't behave.
Your son's language could be part of the problem. Hopefully as language improves, he will too.
Hi T.,
first off let me just say "GOD BLESS YOU!!", too many times i see parents who give up on their babies because they are special needs, bless you for being an outstanding mother. i worked with children that were autistic a long time ago, and we had a boy that would rock so hard back & forth when they vehicle stopped he gave himself whiplash. we were at our witts end when one day one of the other kids handed him a gameboy and POOF he quit. not sure if it would work for you or not, but it's worth a shot. good luck & God bless you & yours.
C.
I think Jill had some good advice. I have worked with people with Autism for several years now and have seen this be a common issue for those persons who like to ride in the car. I think it is probably sensory related. Your son probably either likes being in a state of motion or the vibration of the car and therefore gets frustrated when the car slows down. Have you been to an OT? They may be able to do a sensory profile and can help give you some individualized ideas to help.
being a single mom with an autistic son is very hard. i did it for years alone before I met my husband. Your son may be afraid of accidents. If he can talk (since he is borderline) try getting him to talk about his fears. explain to him that we have to stop at red lights and stop signs because that is what we are supposed to do. Talk calmly to him and tell him that he is ok and everything is fine. Explain what you are doing just before you do it. "we are going to stop at this stop sign but we will go again when it is our turn, you are ok and everything is fine" If he refuses to talk about what is bothering him, maybe seek out the help of a counselor. Best of luck and God bless!!!!
