Are People Who Rearrange Dishwasher Being Hostile??

You're too funny! I am the dishwasher re-arranger and it's choice D. - I'd rather hand wash that one pot that's taking up the whole bottom rack than the the 12 plates and 6 bowls that will fit in it's place.
Now what drives me crazy is when guests to my home re-arrange my kitchen cabinets!

Wow-crabby mama overload.

So much for this site being a place where Mama's can come to feel supported and related too.

Here's a thought-if you don't like a post then don't post an answer-and don't read more into it then what is on the page, thereby thinking you are allowed to go off on some completely out of context tangent just so you can feel validated.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: IMO, most people think they have the lock-down on right and wrong ways of doing things. Many are willing to assert their "rightness" no matter how trivial the task.

Also, after reading some of these responses I'm going to have to answer Jo W.'s post with a big 'ol hell yeah!

If this is all you have to worry about, I wish I had your life. If someone wants to duplicate work, I say let them. Who cares?

Wow, some cranky mamas on this post, sorry they brought negativity to a fun question! And I'm glad you posted, because this drives me crazy- but I'm the one who rearranges! My hubby is the smartest guy I know, but he has yet to figure out the physics of the dishwasher. Putting a bowl facing up on the top rack? Really? Dishes overlap and block one another. It's chaos in there. I would say he fakes incompetence so that I'll do the work, but he does load the dishwasher! I mostly rearrange in secret, and cringe a little if it's already running before I can get to it. I have to just say a quick little prayer that the come out right. Ah, I feel better confessing that!

Thanks for the post. I must have read it with the right amount of levity, the same amount of levity with which it was written. Humor just escapes some people. Have a great day!

I'm that person. I'm OCD. Would I say it's because of a mental illness? Nope. That paints a picture of 'I have to do it THIS way or I'm blowing the house up'. It just has to be a certain way, and no, every way is not the same, no, the dishes do not come out just as clean other ways.

Hostility doesn't even factor into this equation, what are you asking this for?

And it's not hypothetical if you 'know several tidy people in my family who do this'.

ETA: Actually, Angela didn't do anything wrong. She answered your question honestly, and if you'll note, everyone else is wondering 'who cares?' as well.

Dishwasher question aside, I generally feel hostile toward an eleventh hour helper. :)

Lucky for me, I'm probably the only member of my family who has actually SEEN the inside of our dishwasher. Sigh.

I'd go with

D) They just happen along, it's full, but it's loaded wrong so they fix it, then run it. I do not believe it's a direct attack. But then I don't know the other family member like you do!

;)

D - Because I am that person. I can't stand the way my husband puts the dishes in, so willy nilly!!! ARGH! I will always come behind him and rearrange. If it makes the other person happy to rearrange your dishwasher, is it really that big of a deal?
L.
EDIT - I get the humor too! I don't want people to think I am cranky because I laughed when I read it.

I am that person. BUT! I only do it if everything isn't fitting in. If everything is in there, I just run the thing. However if there is a cup or bowl sitting in the sink that I *know* I can get to fit by just organizing everything better, I do it.

I have 5 kids so we PACK the dishwasher every day, sometimes twice a day on weekends. There's not really room for willy-nilly cup organization! I will also go in and make sure my special mugs are in there safely -- I like the handles to be in there a certain way so they don't clank against the other cups!

So I guess my reasons for rearranging the dishwasher are:
(1) I don't want random dirty dishes out all night.
(2) I want to make sure the things I like don't break.

No we're not hostile, we're right :p

Kind of joking, but not really. It's about an orderly approach to life. I can guarantee you that if you are a haphazard dishwasher loader, if I loaded your dishwasher, I'd fit more into it and when you went to put things away, everything would be grouped neatly and ready to stack and store. It doesn't take me longer to load and I load all day as well, but I don't just put things in randomly. Porcelain plates go here, plastic plates with round edges there, plastic with flat edges in another spot, all forks and spoons go in individual slots facing the same direction, drink ware is grouped by type (glass or plastic) and size, etc. It doesn't take any more time load, you get more in, and it's faster to unload.

I give the dishwasher a once-over before I start it and if things need to be moved around, I take 30 seconds, put everything in the right spot and then start it. It's not crazy, it's efficient.

FWIW, my groceries look like Tetris on the conveyor belt. Frozen food first, dairy second, meat third, produce fourth, boxed stuff fifth, followed by bagged and soft items like bread and eggs, then cases of juice boxes and soda. That way it all gets grouped into the right bags and then when we unload the groceries, like things are already bagged together and can be put away together.

I should also note that my kitchen cabinets have p-Touch labels on the edges of the shelves so everyone knows what goes where. And I took a photo of the correct way to arrange the glasses in our cabinet and taped it to the door so that things are in the right place. Otherwise I end up with stray glasses all over the counters because the kids can't make them fit. I love that I have a job that rewards figuring out how to do things quickly and efficiently because it really fits the way I think.

I get them humor in your post, A.!

I tell my husband to leave the room when I load the dishwasher. He does it a certain way and I can feel his judgement with how I shove things in there. He would never be so ridiculous and OCD to reload it, though. Kind of like how I HATE how he folds fitted sheets, but I wouldn't refold, because I'm just glad I'm the one doesn't have to do it!

I think people do this for mostly obnoxious reasons, and because they feel like they do everything better. (Incidentally, that is also obnoxious.)

I don't understand why people comment on a post if they don't care. I see alot of posts that I don't really care about and I skip them and go on to the next. I would say they are OCD as well, lol.

I'm (apparently) your husband in this scenario.

I have OCD and it's not "mental illness" nor is it being obnoxious nor is it hostility when I rearrange the dishwasher. OCD is part of my Anxiety Disorder and it has nothing to do with anyone else. It's a compulsion. It's impulsive. I do certain things because it allows my brain to feel more ordered and organized. That includes things like the dishwasher.

My therapist insists I use this as practice to walk away from stressful situations that could be relationship wreckers due to the OCD. I get agitated so I'm forced to find other things to do to occupy my brain and force myself to forget that the dishwasher isn't organized exactly the way I would like. Or the clothes washer doesn't have exactly the items in it that I think should be washing. Or my daughters' bookbags aren't arranged exactly how I would arrange them. Or the items in the fridge and pantry aren't lined up exactly how I need them to be.

I slip a lot on the "practice" opportunities. It's nothing personal. Luckily my family has chosen to view it as a quirk.

Haha! I'm the re-arranger in our in our house. But that's because when we bought our new and suuuuuuper fabulous dishwasher a year ago, I finally took the time to read the manual (I normally don't do this). The manual showed via drawings the best way to load the dishwasher for optimal cleaning. My husband, on the other hand, throws the dishes in willy nilly. He'll have the big stuff blocking the little stuff, then the little stuff doesn't get the same amount of water/soap hitting it and ends up w/ dried on muck. I've shown him the manual, but he doesn't care to change his loading, so I do it right before I turn it on. Also, when loaded properly, you can fit a heck of a lot more dishes in there. We live in drought country here, so I'm cognizant of wasting water if you have to wash them over and over to get them clean.

I fully admit to being a bit of a type A personality. The fact of the matter is, I'm not a wasteful person. I see having to do something over as wasteful. Wasteful of my time! :)

Added: I wrote this w/out reading the other responses, but just got a kick out of how many of us cited the word "willy nilly" -- too funny!

None of the above, I load our dishwasher and there is a specific way to load it to maximize the capacity of the dishwasher.

It is not mental illness, it is not hostility, or being obnoxious, it is simply not wasting water or electricity.

I have the flip side, I load the dishwasher all the time and my husband loads all willy nilly. I don't assume he is trying to drive me crazy or waste water I assume he simply did not read the manual or take the time to analyze the structure of the dishwasher. When I rearrange I can fit at least ten more dishes in the washer.

Have you even considered why he loads the way he does. Maybe he is on to something.

Frankly, I seem to be the only one in the house able to do puzzles. I understand how to make items fit together. Hubby doesn't. When hubby loads the dishwasher, he can't fit nearly as many dishes in as when I load it. So, yes, I do rearrange it, add some more dishes, and then run it. It's called efficiency.

I don't blame my husband for not being able to figure out the most efficient way to load the dishwasher. He has other talents. But, if you want to call me hostile, mentally ill, or obnoxious, go for it.

I am also way better at jigsaw puzzles, Tetris, and loading the car to make all of the luggage fit. Oh. And the drawer that stores the tupperware and lids. I rearrange that all the time. Frankly, no one else even tries to put those away so they fit.

Uh-oh - so guilty here. And I truly needed to hear your clear observations of those who do the re-shuffling.

In my defense, I do it to make more room to get more in. If it's not lined up just so, certain items won't get clean from the top or the bottom. And belive me if you were cooking all day for me in my house, I would be so happy with anything you did to clean up after yourself, that the dishwasher loading would not be on my list of complaints.

I get your humor and I am sorry some people are being rude. Must be PMS week.

I am one of those who is OCD about organizing my dishwasher. However, I am doing MUCH better about letting things stay in the place where my hubby or daughter puts it because I truly do appreciate the help. I am trying to help daughter learn how to do some things more efficiently in the kitchen and in doing so, I am learning that I have to let go of some of my OCD.

Your post made me smile... and I don't PMS anymore.

I am totally with Michelle on this one. If there are dishes leftover, I will totally rearrange it so that everything will fit. I always load it in a particular way because I know this is the way everything will fit. But if someone else loads it another way and everything fit, I'll cringe a little, but I won't rearrange it. LOL.

And in answer to your question, I say D, none of the above. It's not about being hostile or obnoxious, but about being efficient. :)

Ha ha! I am the rearranger. I can't help it. I am convinced my way is best. It truly is. I have been loading dishes the most in the house, I know by know how to squeeze the most in and do it so they get the cleanest (you can't block the center, people!!! That's where the water comes up!) I try to do it secretly though so the original loader doesn't get offended.

It's definitely not hostility. I guess mental illness comes closest..

HA!! Funny question. I would say type A personality. My husband would do that in two seconds flat. I'm used to it now because that's how he is about everything. If I would let him he would rearrange and order everything. He has some anxiety issues so this fits in with that. He's aware of so that makes it a little better, I also have a friend that would do this. There are simply people how need order and organization and will go to great lengths to get it.

So for my husband I would say B and for my friend I would say C because there is no method to her madness, and she gets highly upset when you tell her to cut it out.

I get the humor, too! Loosen up a little, guys. It's just a fun question.

I'm coming to this a little late (you already have 42 replies), but I haven't read any of your responses yet.

I say "D". I am one of those people who rearranges it. Why do I do it? Usually, because I can fit more stuff into it when it is arranged differently than the way the things are in there when I open it up. For example, I load the dishwasher every day (and empty it, too). I have played around since day 1 when we moved into this house, with the best arrangement to put items in it so that I can maximize what goes in (and yes, so that everything gets clean)... my husband and kids however, just stick things in willy-nilly in the spot they can reach the easiest without bothering to fully open the door and pull out the drawers. Or whatever. They'll put a plastic cup in such a way that the water spray will knock it over on the top rack and it will collect water and gross stuff instead of getting cleaned.

When I put something in someone else's dishwasher I always ask (if they are standing anywhere nearby) if they have a preference about where I put this ____ (glass, plate, mixing bowl, whatever it is). And whether or not they prefer utensils handle end up or the other way.

At my house, I prefer all the handles DOWN, except for sharp knives. THEY go sharp end down, so that I don't get stabbed reaching into the silverware basket...

Now, in some cases, I do get annoyed and a bit aggravated when I am "rearranging" things behind someone who lives in my house, and ought to know at this point in the game how to put a plate in the dishwasher properly (facing inward where the water sprays out, not with the eating surface away from the sprayers) yet they don't. But that isn't because I am just being "hostile" or "obnoxious".... it's the same as if my husband runs a load of laundry and puts in red shirts with the whites. You just don't DO that! And an adult should KNOW that.
And I do not have a diagnosed mental illness. ;)

ETA: oops.. completely forgot to include my example! Usually when I rearrange, I can fit at least 2 more items that have been left sitting out on the counter that otherwise wouldn't have fit. If you turn the bowls THIS way, you can fit 3, if you leave them as is, only 2 fit.

D) None of the above, at least in the case of my family. I think it would depend on the personality of that person.

My mother has a very specific way she likes to load the dishwasher. It has now gotten to the point where everyone brings their plate over to the sink, and sets it there so she can load the dishwasher her way. I don't think she's really OCD (I don't see that in other aspects of her personality), she just has a way she likes it done. Since she doesn't mind that we don't just load the dishwasher anyway, I don't see any harm in letting her do it her way. If we had loaded it, I have no doubt she would have rearranged it to her standards, creating more work for herself.

My husband does this. I vote for A, hostility, with a bit of condescention thrown in. He really believes that I don't know how to load the dishwasher, and that the years I've spent loading it two or three times per day have not given me any insight as to how things get or don't get clean. He follows behind me and moves things after I put them in. My husband is a wonderful man, but this makes me want to break a plate over his head. :)

I think I will settle for taking a picture of the load I am just about to run now and sending it to him at work. Is that wrong :)

Depends. Are they angry when they do it? If not, they just like it a certain way. Or maybe, they're just making room for another dish?

My husband used to think I was making some sort of commentary whenever I rearranged anything in the dishwasher, when, in fact, I was just making room to put my dirty dishes in before starting it. I couldn't care less how it's loaded.

ETA: Oh, one thing I do like to do - put in the sliverware so it's easy to unload (forks together, knives together). My husband is all about specific order in the washer except for this. He's convinced willy-nilly - including sharp ends up - gets things cleaner. I do rearrange to put the sharp ends down because our 2 year old likes to help unload.

LOL I have to laugh because this seems to be a touchy thing in a lot of households, including my own. I don't know what it is but it seems that everyone has their own way of loading a dishwasher and many get feisty if it's not done their way, myself included, lol. Don't ask me why. It's just one of those things. I know it would bother me if someone rearranged my dishwasher, but if they did it to fit more in then ok. But if they did it and put plastics on the bottom and so then I'd have a fit. It is funny when you think about it, but alas, it is a touchy with some of us, lol.

And for those who do not take posts with how they're intended, don't worry about them. I had a post removed because someone or more than one thought a reply of mine was too harsh but the topic was a hot one and I replied with my own opinion without attacking the writer at all. Such is life on some forum boards. Some can bash others cuz they've been here longer and are more "popular" and others can't do the same. Don't worry about it.

K. B
mom to 5 including triplets

It's their effort. So why do you care? And how is this even remotely in the ballpark of 'mass murderer' potential?

My DH has a "method" to the dishwasher. So does his mom. We've come to the agreement that:

1. Nobody rearranges anybody's dishwasher in the other person's home.
2. My MIL will load her own dishwasher and the family puts the dishes by the sink for her.
3. If DH cooks and wants me to clean (do dishes), he cannot then complain about how I clean or rearrange the dishes. If he wants things just "so", HE needs to load the dishes.
3b. If the teenager actually loads the dishes, as long as there is a full load, nobody rearranges the dishes. If you want someone else to do it, you need to let them use their process.

In our home, DH could add a few things and fuss with it if he wanted, but if it was ready to run, he would need to just let it go. I don't think he's hostile, just has a way he likes.

I actually think this is something where the family can work on communication and compromise. It may ONLY be the dishes (or the toothpaste or the toilet paper) but if you nitpick every single every day thing, there are going to be issues. Rather, compromise and move on. People can get wrapped up in seemingly meaningless fights - when it's not REALLY the dishes/paste/paper. It's about the underlying issues of control.

I am the one who loads it here. I like to fit in as much as possible and run the dw only when full. I also don't want to find a bowl or cup full of water when I open it.
At other people's home, I always offer to help clean up after a meal. If that involves loading the dw, I ask how they want it done. Otherwise, I don't give it a thought.
Any thing that bothers you is fair game for a discussion!

I am extremely anal about how to load the dishwasher. There is a way to do it so all pieces come out clean. When my kids and husband put stuff in there, I do rearrange it because the way I look at it, I'll have to re-wash it most likely by hand, and who wants to do that? I also hate, hate, hate when people put forks in with the prongs shooting up. I have stabbed my fingers too many times reaching in to unload the silverware section, so that it is a rule in my house now. All forks and knives go down! So I don't consider myself A, B, or C. I consider myself rational. :)

Eeks... I am sooo anal about the dishwasher. BUT!!! It is only so I can fit/cram more dishes in there b/c I hate to handwash :P

My husband could care less if he had a few dishes in the dishwasher, run it, and have a full sink to hand wash - b/c he really could care less.

I get the humor as well..lol! Unfortunately, I am one of those people. When my SO or kids load the dishwasher, they waste a lot of room so I usually rearrange it only so everything will fit in one load. I think I might be a little OCD about it but not hostile. To them, they probably thinking I'm being obnoxious but I'm really not trying to be.

I'm the rearranger here. It's not that I LIKE to do it, it's that if I don't rearrange what my husband has put in there, each load would be about one place setting. It's amazing how much space he can make a plate and a bowl take up!

My husband does this. Its just OCD but I also take offense. Drives me crazy!

For my grandmother to do it would be option A. Nothing can be done to that woman's standards and she belittles by redoing with dramatic sighs. For the rest of humanity I would say option D with the majority doing so for reasons like those stated by Michelle M. (full house = certain order for maximum efficiency, fragile pieces need special attention, etc.).

I can only speak for myself when I say D), but I do that when my husband loads the dishwasher because when he does it, most of the times the dishes come out still dirty and because he doesn’t optimize space. I can fit more dishes in than he does.
That said, I don’t think I’m being hostile since there’s a reason to it (the dishes actually come out cleaner) and I usually don’t do it in front of him.

Haha I do that. My way fits more dishes in that's all! And yes I find it easier to have all the silverware in groups and just like it when all the matching dishes are in line with each other. I embrace my OCD! :) not at all being hostile, and I super appreciate it when my husband does it the way he knows I like, he knows it makes me feel better!

D

The more dishes I can cram into the dishwasher, the less I have to hand wash. I HATE TO HANDWASH. So, if I have to rearrange a little, so be it. I really do appreciate what they did put in there though.

Hi A.!

Well...it seems as if some people's buttons got pushed here! lol

"my Pete" does re arrange the dishwasher. It makes me crazy!

"I" feel as though somehow I did not do it 'correctly'.

We have come to a compromise...

I have kiddos load AND empty...

'My Pete' has no responsibility at all for ANY dish loading OR emptying.

Nor do I (except for a wine glass or three).

This is not the biggest 'concern' in my life...

But surely worthy of a smile at least...YES?

geesh

Ladies and gents...

Sense of humour PLEASE!!

best luck!
michele/cat

I rearrange my dishwasher when my kids load it because when everything is just thrown in there will nilly half of it comes out dirty- My step dad rearranges the dishwasher always because he has OCD he cant help it we accept it it is after all his house. It is not a hostile act just the way he is I do it not as a hostile act just the way I am. A place for everything and everything in it's place even in the dishwasher...

I have to say in your situation it might be a case of OCD. Not being hostile or anything like that but they like it being a certain way which is somewhat odd because you say they havent pitched in to help all day long.

I am sort of like this person. Although I AM the one doing the cleaning and putting dishes in the dishwasher all day, so from the beginning it is nice and neat and how I like it.

When I was younger living with my family which consisted of 8 or more people, I HATED it when they just threw everything in wherever. Only because when you do that there isn't much room for anything after a few hours. If you put them in nicely to begin with then there is plenty of room and more things can fit in there and you run less loads of dishes.

It still drives me crazy when I go over there and try to put a dish in the dishwasher to see it so disorganized but hey, it's not my place anymore. Lol. I guess it's the OCD part of me.

But it's like anything you organize, if you do keep things nice theres always room for more.

But I'm just crazy like that ;)

Depends on the rearranger.

If it's someone like my parents, it's hostile/critical because "you didn't do it right".

If it's someone like my husband, it's his personal issue. He's a engineer and requires logic and order, and it is not at all directed personally at me. (This may fall under your B, but I'm not sure if being an engineer is technically classified as a mental illness. It certainly falls under C at times.)

If it's my children, it's definitely C and/or D. D being that particular random factor in which there is no discernible motive for any given action. It just is.

D) I am being environmentally conscious :)

Hubby often 'helps' by loading the dishwasher. I can get double or triple what he can in there. If I just ran it the way he loaded it I would be doing 1 - 2 extra loads of dishes. By reloading it I'm conserving water and energy.

I might also be a little OCD, but 'environmentally conscious' sounds so much better.

Someone in my immediate (household) family or an extended family member. I'm of the camp that puts everything in there any way it fits and it all comes out clean. I can load a full sink of dishes in just a few minutes. My husband takes FOREVER and he can never seem to fit everything in - there's always something left over in the sink that has to be washed by hand later - ughhhh! Just PUT IT IN THERE - it will come out clean, I promise. I vote OCD on the organized dishwasher thing.

I think it is just their own issue...they truly think it must be done that way. I don't take it personally or think they are being hostile. My sister is like this with her dishwasher...she MUST have it loaded the way the manufacturer says to do it. She will rearrange it otherwise. She will tell you when you are visiting not to bother to load up the dishwasher bc she has to do it just right. So...we all just don't load the dishwasher. Instead I will help by washing some pots and pans or doing something else when visiting her.

D: My husband is anal retentive. He comes behind me a reloads the dishwasher. My way or his way- it doesn't matter. They come out as equally clean. I consider it a blessing, I guess. At least he fills up the dishwasher and cleans up. No complains here.

i can relate to this. my hubby things he is a dishwasher master. to me, it is a big jumble, and i think he could fit more. however, he is the one who rearrange when I do dishes! it annoys me a bit, because I think he's making it worse, but whatever. i rearrange his dishes sometimes too. what annoys me mores is when he puts it on the super scrub cycle that takes 3 HOURS when he practically washes them first! what a waste! he is a little OCD about dishes, so in my opinion...mental illness!

I'll rearrange if it can fit more dishes in or if they're placed really poorly (or if someone puts in a wooden utensil - what?) and when it comes to my own dishwasher, I kind of like things in a certain order. However, I can't stand it when I visit my mother, do the dishes and she criticizes the way I put things in her dishwasher. Is it REALLY so important that the bowls HAVE to be lined up around the outer edges? Really? If you can't tell, she has big-time OCD tendencies.

I am in the "couldn't care less" camp of how the dishwasher gets loaded. I had an organizing expert helping me who seemed quite anal about the topic. It was the first time I ever realized there were people who viewed it that way! According to her it makes it faster to unload it too.

I just can't be that detail oriented on something so seemingly trivial, so I'm going to pick option "B" from the list. Or maybe it's me with the mental illness. :P

They are crazy and do not have enough to do.

D
I have a certain way I load the dishwasher...cups are lines up by size and so are the plates, etc. It's just the way I do it.
My husband has a certain way he loads the dishwasher.
Neither one of us rearranges, but we both do have our systematic way of doing it.

Since I'm the one who rearranges, I felt compelled (yep, that's the "compulsive" part of my OCD) to answer this one. Our dishwasher absolutely does NOT get dishes clean if they aren't loaded properly. I think it just doesn't have enough water pressure to do both sides, so dirty sides have to face the center. Is it possible that "crazy re-loader" has a dishwasher like that? The other reason I rearrange is that I can't stand to try to pull out the drawer only to have an upright cup or bowl (who puts things in the dishwasher that way!?!) spill dirty, chunky, soapy water all over the clean stuff. For that reason, I have to answer that it's mostly B (undiagnosed, of course) for me, but sometimes I get to A when someone I love is being what I consider C by not even trying to compromise (I'll accept that the little plates are mixed in with the big ones if you'll stop melting plastic plates in the bottom drawer). Hope this helps you, cause it's sure giving me a good laugh ;)

I load it one way and hubby loads it another. It doesn't pay to redo it either way. Just wash the blank dishes and spoons and then put them away.

I usually get can more in than he but since he is home and I work I let him do it. Do a bit of a compromise and don't get all upset. Ask the person why they changed them after you loaded it. This is the only way you will know why.

Happy dishes to you.

The other S.

PS If the item doesn't fit, wash by hand, dry it, and put it away. One less thing to put up.

I just tell my husband not to touch it. I don't think I'm OCD but I wash things a certain way, fold things a certain way and load the dish washer a certain way HAHA. And I don't think I'm a mass murderer. (or am i? kidding). I know that no matter what the dishes will be just as clean and the towels will still fit in the cabinet and dry me off just as well, I just like things a certain way. BUT this is at MY house, never ever ever would I go into your dishwasher and rearrange it, I don't care about your dishwasher.. just mine. So it sounds to me that the relative is hostile and probably condescending. They obviously think you are doing it wrong or don't know what you're doing at all... plus there's a little mental illness thrown in... who in the hell cares about someone else's dishwasher?! If someone did that to me and I saw it i would go right behind them and put it the way I had it (I'm a passive agressive b*tch though :) ).

I wouldn't rearrange my dishwasher, but yes I have a specific way I load the dishwasher, but mine is more for organization and to make it easier to unload. I put all the knifes together, forks together, etc. And I put all the same dishes together, so when I empty it, it's easier to put everything away. It doesn't take any additional time to load it the way I do, and it does save me some time when I unload it. I do think I have a mental disorder though. Not a diagnosable or maybe even a real disorder, but I definitely have my quirks when it comes to cleaning. I have a specific way I clean the house, in a specific order, and specific cleaners for each item and it bugs me to watch people do it differently. When I was on bedrest, I went insane watching my MIL and my mother clean my house. It just wasn't the "right" way.

I never, ever load the dishwasher at my sister's house! & her daughters don't touch it either! We know better. We know that no matter how we do it, my sis will reload it. Oh, well. In this case, my sis is D....she's simply obsessive which I don't consider a mental illness.

My sons & DH would like to claim that they don't load the dishwasher properly to suit me. I say B.S. I say they use this as an imagined excuse to get out of wiping their own...... :) My only rule is: plastic on top & tilt the concave bottoms so they don't hold water. Oh, & my copper-bottom Revereware cannot go in the dishwasher....it ruins them.

I don't consider myself any of the above......but as for that OCD family member of yours. No Thank You! On the other hand, how is this harming you? Its not! As long as the danged thing is turned on & the dishes are clean.....who cares!

are those all the options?... someone cant be organized, conservative and maybe a little ocd, without having a mental illness????? I am one of the ones that has a specific pattern to loading the dishwasher (along with basically everything else in my life). When the dishwasher is well organized it fits a lot more, which saves water and energy. Also, in truth, they do get cleaner in my opinion when things aren't randomly placed, touching each other... ok sorry, but your post was extremely judgmental, there are lots of different personalities in this world, and no we don't reorganize it to be hostile!

There are only two ways to load a dishwasher. My way and the wrong way :)

That being said, I am the only loader at my house, so it usually doesn't matter. However, if my mom or sister are visiting, if they want to load the dishwasher, be my guest! I won't complain if I get the help. But, I can usually fit two full sinks of dishes in one load. I can visualize how they will all fit and only have to load it and run it once. And my way makes it super easy to unload, too. My sister will spend 15 minutes reorganizing and still not be able to fit everything in. Drives me crazy!

Ha...If someone is nice enough to load my dish washer for me i try to let it go however it is. My step mom is a stuff it to the brim however it works. I have my way of doing it. All tidy and organized.I also check dishes afterwards and rewash if needed.
I have a friend who says i am a bit ocd on this.
I wouls have just pushed the start button, not reorganize it.` ````````````````````

If someone else is doing the work of loading the dishwahser, I couldn't care less how they arrange the dishes. It's one less chore I have to do.

I too a an organizer and have everything in its place weather that be the grocery checkout where everything is in groups by type and where they go, or the dishwasher also in groups. With that having been said and people who are much more haphazard than me calling me ocd, there are those more ocd than me. When at my parents I help out with the dishes and both my parents have rearranged the dishwasher after I load it. Remember I am 40 here and have been this my whole life and called ocd by some about it, and yet my parents are more ocd about it than me. I honestly think ocd is a very incorrect term. I think people have ways they do things, how they like things, and it is just human nature. Whoever is rearranging your dishwasher didn't need to do it, but yet they did. So the most likely reason barring any kind of resentment on their part would be just plain old liking it that way. They could have just pushed the start button but they didn't. Perhaps they felt the need to do it out of that need for things to be just right or perhaps they thought by rearranging it they might appear more helpful or maybe they really do have a touch of ocd or maybe some other reason none of us can think of. The only way I would say it is hostility is if there was a recent fight or there is tension in the relationship with that person, then hostility comes into play, but likely that is not the case as you didn't mention anything like that. But for me I load it a certain way and the only reason I would rearrange it is to fit more in. I tend to think I am haphazard about it compared to other things.

Wait a minute...you own a dishwasher? Lucky you! :^)