Am Iwrong?

I think you need to address this with your husband. Come up with a reasonable date a few months out and tell your BIL that he needs to make other living arrangements by that date.
I'm all for helping people out, especially family, but this sounds like a pressure cooker situation.
Your immediate family (you, hubby, kids) need your own space.
Is there something else going on? Does he have a drug or alcohol problem? Even if he does not, your family is enabling him to live this way--like a sponge. Sometimes even grown up birds need a push out of the nest! Good luck!

Not at all he has a job and can support himself. it sounds like your husband feels sorry for him and is an enabler. Sorry to say it is time to kick him out. Tell your husband look I know you love your brother but he isn't helpless and makes good enough money to support himself. He doesn't help enough around here and the kids need their room back. tell him you really want to be able to have sexy nights with him again you know build up his ego a little. He may just not realize how much he has missed his and your privacy.

Tell your husband that if he wants to continue helping his brother in this way, you'll have to find a place with four bedrooms. That way he can have his own room, you and your husband can have your room, and you will have 2 rooms for your children. I'm assuming you have at least one boy and one girl, so you need to have a room for each gender.
You are definitely NOT wrong in wanting him out under the circumstances. I would never allow an uncle to be in the same room with my daughter, and don't think most people would. Your husband needs to do this for your benefit as well as for the benefit of his brother. As someone else stated, this is an enabling situation and he needs to let his brother grow up and be a man rather than treating him like a child.

You're not wrong at all, especially if your b-in-law is 27 and making enough money to support an apartment.

I have a feeling there is more to the family dynamic than what you've said ie: why your husband is so protective of your brother and feels the need to be a parent to him. Is there some sort of disability he is dealing with?

If it were me, I would talk with my husband and have him consider how him living with you all is hindering him from growing up and being a man of his own. Your bil deserves the opportunity to grow up even though it might feel like a struggle. You cant take care of him his whole life. He deserves the opportunity to live and have relationships and possibly a family of his own. I agree with different posts that it's time to boot him out of the nest. Give him something like 90 days notice to find a place and and a roommate and in the meantime give him more responsibility. He should be paying 1/3 of the expenses - rent utilities cable etc. If your husband is committed to having him stay then you need to move to a bigger apartment or house where you all can have your space.

I hope this works out for you. I cant imagine how you have lasted this long.

You are absolutely correct. Your brother-in-law is taking advantage and your children are too old to share a room with an adult.

Sit him down and let him know that he has one month to find his own place. Let him know that he is welcome to come for dinner any time, but the children need their own space due to their ages.

You have done more than enough. Don't feel badly about it- just let him know that you all need the space. I would also talk with your husband and let him know that you feel like you are actually holding his brother back from growing-up. Continuing to support an adult will not make him more responsible.

Good luck!

it sounds like it's time for him to get out. Bring it up with your husband, let him know it isnt fair to your kids and it isnt really helping your brother in law. It cant be too much fun to be a 27 year old who has to share a room with a 6 year old. Let him know you can help him find furniture (Craigs list is awesome!) and help him find an apartment, close by if he wants, but it's time to leave the nest.

Either your BIL needs to move or your family needs to move away from him. Even without your BIL, with you, your husband and three kids, two bedrooms is not a lot of space. Start apartment hunting now. If you find a good place for your family, make sure the BIL is NOT on the lease and do not give him a key to your new apartment. Tell the BIL it would be nice if he had the room / privacy so he could find a wife and start a family of his own. He's a grown man now. He should be able to stand on his own two feet.

No you are not wrong. Your husband is enabling your brother-in-law. Until your husband makes him leave, the brother will not grow up. Your husband needs to be more loyal to a happy healthy home for his kids than a motel for his brother.

Good Grief, are you kidding me? I can't imagine 6 year old twins... especially one of each gender and do you also have 2 other children living in one room with Mom and Dad. Please explain to your husband that that is NOT a healthy living arrangement! Why would he deprive his own children for his brother?

Nope. He needs to go. I'm surprised you've let it go on this long. Write your husband and BIL each a letter and, without attacking the brother, list all the reasons YOU & YOUR KIDS need the space and a reasonable date you would like to have it by. Good luck!

I would not have let him move in so I say yes it's time for him to go.

I would tell him that if he is staying your going to have to rent a bigger place and his share will be _____ whatever it is. and divide the bills in 3rds and give him a third of all the bills. He will stay or leave. if he ops not to stay then you move 2 sets of bunk beds in that room. he can have a bottom bunk and the 6 yr old on top bunk. put the other 2 kids in the other bunkbed. he won't stay long if he is sharing the room with 3 kids lol. good luck

I live in a two bedroom house with two kids and I currently share my bedroom with the youngest - so I can feel your pain. I am miserable with the lack of space and there are more people in your house than mine! It is PASSED time for your brother-in-law to be out of there. I understand taking care of family temporarily, when they need it, but it sounds to me like you are being taken advantage of. Your kids are getting older and it is not fair to them to have to be living on top of one another for the sake of their grown uncle. He should have offered to leave himself by now, and the fact that he has not speaks volumes about his character - or lack there of. It is time for your husband, as the man of the house, to put his foot down to his brother and get him out. Ask him how he expects his brother to ever have a household of his own, if he won't leave yours? If the husband won't go for that, then it is time to put your foot down to him.

Good luck.

G. I am sorry you are going through this too. I think this is something typical of hispanic families. My friend had the same problem and finally after about 6 years and talking to everybody (friends and relatives) and arguing with husband her brother in law finally moved out. The same exact story. Talk to family members maybe they can convince him to move out, talk to him and tell him is time to go and keep insisting your husband he needs to go.