Advice on ADHD

I am a pediatric neuropsychologist see a lot of cases like this. I always explain to kids that feel like your daughter that of course no one thinks they are "dumb." I explain to kids that ADHD and LD have nothing to do with how smart you are and that, in fact, many kids with either of these disorders are actually very intelligent. I also explain that diagnosing what is going on will make life easier because they will then have tools to deal with it and play to their strengths. It's like setting a broken bone. You have to get everything in order to heal it or it will only get worse, but treat it and it will work just fine. Hope this helps. Good luck!
Cindy

I teach 4th grade and I am an advocate for getting children tested. the testing is easy, it is a questionairre filled out by the teacher, the doctor and by you. If your daughter is diagnosed as ADHD, medication is NOT the only treatment, there are many ideas out there now. I had a boy last year who was SMART. like off the charts and if he was able to focus, he would have blown everyone away, but his mother refused to acknowledge the fact that he clearly had ADHD and so he was trapped in this hyper body and it took a toll on him, he had a bad self esteem becasue he could see he was different but he could not control it. My dad said it to me best, if a child can see, provide them with glasses, if a child cant hear, provide a hearing aid, if a child cant focus, provide them with tools to help them, those tools can be medication, special diets, counseling etc, but dont deny them the opportunity to learn better because of a label. I know it is hard, I am a parent too and have gone through this in my family, but in the end, you are giving your daughter a better chance to succeed!

I have been through this myself. When I was in 3rd grade my parents had me tested. It was the worst feeling ever. I was embarrashed and felt stupid. My teacher at the time just knew I had a learning disability and wanted to hold me back a year. Luckily my parents did not hold me back and I did get labeled with a learning disability. I suppose not big deal,but it was embarrashing. If you do the testing I would make sure it is private and the other kids do not know. Testing is not a bad idea just understand that she is going to be embarrashed and feel really stupid, just explain it has nothing to do intellengence. I was very smart, but I couldn't sit still long enough to pay attention to what the teacher was saying. You could also try to change her eating habits. My son is ADHD and I have taken certain foods away, such as milk, high frutose corn syrup, red 40 food dye. I had a sensitivity test done on him and these are a few things that he is sensitive to. If a person is sensitive to a food or something in the environment it affects there immune system. It throws it out of balance which will affect behavior and can affect attention span. This is just an idea of something to try, b/c I do not believe in medicine. I did some research on some drugs given to ADHD kids and you might as well just give them a dose of poison. Those drugs are killing those kids. I hope this has helped. If you have any other questions please contact me.

Hey C.,
I would definately suggest getting her screened, but in the meantime I'd take a close look at her diet. I've read that add, adha, autism and autistic spectrum been linked to gut health.
I felt like my son was showing signs for the spectrum so I had him tested. The psychologist said that he showed mild signs, but it was nothing to be worried about. I'm having him screened again in a few months by another ped. psychologist to be sure, but in the meantime I took a long hard look at his diet and found that he had been eating mostly carbs (in the form of breads, pastas and crackers), and sugar (in the form of fruits). The I looked back on my pregnancy and recalled that for about the first 4-6 months of Ben's life he was covered with cradle cap which is one of the signs of having an overgrowth of yeast in the body.
When this occurs, the mother doesn't have the healthy bacteria to pass along to baby so their guts don't form properly and they get many different ailments; allergies, asthma, add, adhd, autism, etc.
We've been following the body ecology diet to heal Ben's gut for the last month. So far I've seen great results. It hasn't been easy that's for sure- but I know that in the long run he'll be healthier. Maybe check it out for yourself. www.bodyecology.com Feel free to email me off the site for any q's you might have. :)
blessings,
J.
____@____.com dot com

I told my 10 year old son that because he was getting so mature and would be a teenager soon that I wanted us to see a doctor that would help make sure our relationship was strong. So many families have problems with teenagers and I wanted him to know that I loved him and would be there for him. I needed some help because sometimes I get very frustrated with him and I know it is not fair to him. He bought it (which is really some of the truth) and we went to an amazing doctor in Naperville. We have had three sessions already and he is doing well. He did have some testing done but the doctor said it was just fun and games to get to know him better. It is all in the way that you present it. I also did not tell him until the day we were going.

The doctor is Kelly Johnson MD and her number is ###-###-####. She was highly recommended to me and I also highly recommend her. My house is now much more peaceful.

Hi C.~
I have ADD/ADHD and it was never diagnosed until I was 27! How frustrating is that:) Well, I was always the girl in the corner staring out the window in the corner. Not the child bouncing all around so it wasn't considered to be in the family of ADD/ADHD.
Honestly, I would have never of told her as to why she was going in to be tested nor would I say the word "test". I would have said something if the results came back to be something that needed to be worked on. ADD is not bad and the people that have it are far from "dumb" they are highly sensitive, artistic caring people. We ahave many more incredible qualities that can be read about in a couple different books.
One thing is that you have the control of seeing a doctor for your daughter. Yes you can go through the school system but that does not mean you will receive the results in a timely matter etc. My parents put me through the school system and I was never diagnosed! While in school, only until I had a hard time with little things at work did I start doing the research and figuring things out for myself. You can get references or talk to your pediatrician about it. Kids are much more easier to find a doctor in the area for ADD/ADHD than it is for adults.
An incredible book called Delivered from Distraction can help you go through the ropes of knowledge on the ADHD subject. It's done by Dr. Hallowel and many people know about him.
Good luck!
M.

I would pursue the testing. Girls are often underdiagnosed, and their self-esteem can be damaged by the time it is figured out. My son has ADD, and I have a very conservative view on medications, so we managed by using behavioral modifications in the classroom. In third grade he completely hit a wall, and could not keep up any more. When I talked to him about what ADD was, and ended up putting him on a low dose of meds, there was a complete turn around. Struggles in school were gone, and he feels good about himself now. He was releived, because he was internalizing and thinking that he was not smart. Other kids were starting to notice that he was struggling as well. He has been doing great-- major difference. Talk to your daughter about what she feels in class, her perceptions of herself. Enforce that you in no way feel she is not smart. Everyone struggles with something. If she does have ADD then this can be managed, to make her life easier. Struggling in silence can be damaging. If she is accusing you of feeling she is stupid, this is really a reflection of how she is feeling about herself. There is a difference in the brains of people who have ADD, and these can be seen in PET scans. Physical, identifiable differences. If this is her struggle and you can manage without meds, that is wonderful. If it cannot be managed without, then don't beat yourself up. It is cruel to tell someone that they are "poisoning" their child by helping giving them medication-- just as it would be for someone to tell a parent of a diabetic or asthmatic child that they are poisoning theirs by giving the meds. You will find what works for your family. H.

My son (off to college this year was accepted as Architecture, Advanced Placement)has ADHD. He was diagnosed rather late, 5th grade. He used to feel dumb, different, and his self esteem was non existant. Once he was diagnosed and given a prescription, his self esteem went through the roof. He realized that it was not his fault, it was that his brain was mis-firing. He could not have done anything to have helped it. I also must add that a therapist helped him come to these conclusions (they always listen better to anyone other than you). You can request the school test her (that's what I did) and it does not cost anything and once requested, the school has a limited time to complete the testing. Our pediatrician had several appts with my son alone, with mom, with dad, all together before prescribing. I'm grateful he took this so seriously and did not just prescribe at our initial appt. If you would like the name of a wonderful therapist who specializes in ADD/ADHD kids and teens, let me know.

Has she ever been diagnosed with Sleep Apnea? Please read this article that was just posted this week on the correlation with ADD/ADHD and sleep apnea. It will explain a lot of things and have your ped look into it before you get a misdiagnosis and get put on meds!

http://www.newswise.com/articles/view/543735/

Also seek dietary alternatives. www.drrapp.com discusses a lot in her book, Is This My Child? how diet can play a big role in ADD/ADHD. Nightline News published a correlation with dyes in foods (yellow dye, red dye, blue dye) to ADD/ADHD triggers a few months ago, so it is more than just sugar that can have an effect.

Good Luck!

J. W. MPH
Lifestyle and Wellness Consultant

My son, who is now 18yrs. old was diagnosed with ADHD when he was, I believe, in the 3rd grade. We struggled for years helping him learn and we knew he was an incredibly smart boy. We tried the Pfieffer Clinic that treats ADHD with vitamins and minerals, but that didn't seem to get the job done. I resisted medication because I didn't want to drug my son, but in the end the medication is what put him on the right track. The way that I explained it to him is that his brain has connection points in it. He is very smart and his brain is working overtime, but it needs a little help to make the connections, so that the information gets where it needs to go. If our children had a broken leg, we would put a cast on it so that the connection would heal. If our children had an illness that required an antibiotic to heal, we would give it to them. Children with ADHD are no different, their bodies just need a little extra help to process the incredible amount of information flooding their brains. I would encourage you to seek out a professional to help you evaluate her situation. I'm sure they've come a long way in evaluating and treating childen with ADHD since my son was diagnosed. But, be encouraged...my son, who struggled so much with school when he was young, is now a freshman at the University of Illinois, majoring in Architecture and graduated from high school with honors.

It's very likely that (like anyone) she does not have much attention span for things that are boring, irrelevant or otherwise difficult for her. There is a vicious cycle at work when a child is made to believe she's delayed or not good in a school subject(s), then wanting her to be motivated to learn the skills so intervening with remedial action, then being labeled with an attention deficit when she's not performing. I recommend the book "In Defense of Childhood: Protecting Kids' Inner Wildness" by Chris Mercogliano for a great description of how schools often ruin the love of learning for kids that don't fit the exact mold and timing they expect.

I'm also going to paste part of the response I just gave to a mom about her concerns about speech for her toddler because it totally applies here:

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And keep in mind there *are* risks to seeking intervention for a perfectly normal child (and delayed children as well)- labels, behavioral manipulation, and feelings of not being right or good enough or needing "fixing." I'm much more sensitive to this aspect of it now being a mom than I was as a practicing therapist before I had kids. Trust in your child's perfection and trust in your gut feeling about this (not your "paranoid letting worry sneak in" gut feeling, but the real Knowing gut feeling). You know your child best!
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It sounds like your daughter is already extremely sensitive to how others are perceiving her and this relates directly to how she's perceiving herself. Instead of worrying and focusing on what you see as possible problems, I would be focusing on seeing her as whole and perfect and honoring her unique path of learning so that she can come to eventually see herself that way again. Despite what we've been lead to believe, her long-term success hinges much more on this than any school subject because when we preserve that inner wisdom and sparkle, the facts and knowledge become hers to discover naturally, confidently and on her own schedule.

If it is causing struggles, I would seek help from your ped. It could be nothing, but it could also be anything from ADHD to a sensory integration to a hearing/vision problem to a very gift but bored child.

We have a 12 year old daughter diagnosed with ADHD. She can focus wonderfully on those tasks she is interested in. She is unbelieve at art and music. She is very organized for the things she loves. She plays the violin and composes her own music.

Yes, people place labels on others, but they will whether or not an actual diagnosis is given. Start looking into this now before middle school--which is one of the toughest times. Labels are HUGE in middle school.

Look for more opportunities for your daughter to spend time doing the things she is good at.

Dear C.,
I had a couple of ideas that might help. Some years ago I was given a web site
addwarehouse.com
which had all kinds of books and other materials to help understand ADHD. I hope that is the right web site. The other thing is that about 3.5 years ago, I became a distributor for a nutrition products company, Reliv International. It is a multi level marketing company which, for me, was the down side as I was never good at selling, but I use the products and had the opportunity to hear a lot of stories about the benefits of nutrition for children with ADHD. Of course, it is not meant to be a cure, but somehow having all of the proper nutrients to balance out the body seemed to help a lot of medical issues. I would be glad to put you in touch with someone who could give you more information. You can check out
reliv.com
for more information. I definitely use the products but don't work the business. You are welcome to contact me off list at
____@____.com
Good luck to you and your famly.
S. Howerton

You have the right to ask the school to evaluate your child and develop an education plan that will empower your child to succeed. If you have more questions, the group Family Resource Center on Disabilities ( you can google them for more information) can give you information and support to get your child the help she needs at school.

Make sure you take her to a specialist in this area to have her screened properly and if she is diagnosed, make sure you do ALOT of research on the medications for ADD/ADHD and side effects. Extra tutoring and cognitive therapy may be the way to go for her.

I take my 7 year old this afternoon to talk to the Dr. about his Evaluation. He is definetley ADD. Today we talk about meds. We have talked to the school counselor. She was a great help in explaining to him that we finding that his brain works differently than some peoples. That his runs way too fast to absorb everything, so we need to slow it down. The school counselor has age appropriate books to help them understand too. It is worth the evaluation to at least find out what is going on. I have been waiting for a teacher to initiate it, because I hated the thought of meds and wanted to wait until necessary. I gave up and started the process on my own with his pediatrician. If you would like I can let you know how our appointment goes this afternoon. Good Luck and let her know she is just too smart, not at all dumb!

have an eval done with her ped but also have her eyes checked! if her eyes aren't working together she can get tired and frustrated and it may show up as a short attention span. i went to a dr in arlington heights - dr. paul lederer. he was great!
he talked about the fact that more than 50% of the ADHD cases are merely a visual problem but nobody is looking at the kids eyes. it's worth a shot instead of possibly turning to meds

My son's first 3 teachers all mentioned the possibility of his having ADD so in 3rd grade we had him evaluated & the findings were negative. We were told he suffered from anxiety & that we were too focused on his grades so they advised family counseling. He was a dreamer & was never a behavior problem. We did the counseling & had him tutored in math 5th through 8th grade. All through grade school I thought he was an underachiever because he appeared bright but lazy & disorganized. Parent teacher conferences were painful~just a list of complaints. His first year of high school he failed algebra & had to take it in summer school. In his sophomore year of high school he joined the running team to lose weight & for the first time since 2nd grade was on the honor roll. About the same time a friend who had been a school counselor told me he recognized that both my husband & son had ADD. Because he would soon be taking his college entrance exams we decided as a family to try medication. At first my son was very upset about his diagnosis but he has never used it as an excuse.
You may want to have her evaluated for peace of mind. I don't think the choice to try meds would have been as simple for us if we had to decide when he was your daughter's age. My advice to you is to do the research & you may find like we did that making some lifestyle changes that include regular vigorous exercise, limiting TV & computer games & learning relaxation techniques can go along way to helping your child succeed. If you get to the place where you are considering trying meds rely on your child's feedback more than what any doctor advises. We tried every ADD medication before my son discovered what was best for him. Having ADD just means more challenges.
For many years I feared my son would tire of struggling in school & drop out but next spring he will receive his degree in psychology!

This might not be ADHD. Have you read anything about Sensory Integration Disorder (aka Sensory Processing Disorder)? The symptoms of the two can look very much the same, and some kids have both. But, SID seems much more common. My 5-yr old daughter was diagnosed with this a few months ago.

There are some good websites about SID, and I would also recommend the books "The Out-of-Sync Child" and "Raising a Sensory-Smart Child." There are probably other good ones as well...I am sure your library would have some.

If you read more and think this might be something your daughter has, you can ask your pediatrician for a prescription for occupational therapy. An occupational therapist is the specialist that diagnoses and treats this, i.e. no meds, which is great.

Get a professional to give an IQ test. They usually do the Wexler. It is also done by the schools if requested, however, the psychologist does a much better in depth IQ test. Most insurances should cover it. He will also be able to tell by this test if there are any attention problems. She won't feel like you are labeling her "Dumb". Not all kids with high IQ's have attention problems. The problem can be because she is not being challenged enough - that allows their minds to wander as well. They get bored.

You mention she has trouble SOMETIMES. ADHD children would have trouble all the time in both school and home.

The tutor suggested to get her tested? Being a parent going through the special ed with a child and clearly knowing all the child's rights, I do know teachers (and I am sure it would include the tutor) are not allowed to make such suggestions in that direction.

C. T.

It is a shock to find out that you might be different from other people, so it's not surprising she had a reaction to hearing the idea. Obviously you need a diagnosis before you can get into details about it with her, though. If she does have ADD, there are books for kids and teenagers about it.

Also, tell her that Michael Phelps has ADHD! I read somewhere once that ADD is more like "differently focused" than "lack of focus" because my son can definitely show hyper-attention when he is engaged, and hyper-attention can be a very good thing when it's directed - like to winning gold medals!

As far as the evaluation process is concerned, you can try talking to her about how every person learns differently, and the evaluation is to help figure out what will be the best way for her to learn.

You have the option to request an evaluation through your school. I don't know much about how that works, but someone at the school district office should be able to direct you, or find out who at your school leads the Resource Team, and that person should be able to help.

If your insurance will cover it, we had our son evaluated by a behavioral neuropsychologist. It was about a half-day of tests and without insurance it would have cost over $1000, but we had several different areas of concern and the psychologist and counselor who had seen my son weren't exactly sure what the diagnosis was, so we felt we needed the full workup. I believe if it's a classic case with straightforward symptoms, a pediatrician can diagnose ADHD.

You daughter needs an enviornment where she can make her attention issues work for her. Let her excell and get her evaluated with a person who specializes in educational testing. That is what I did. Get counselign yourself to learrn to be posative.

Hi C.!
Most ADHD issues are based from diet and intolerance to the synthetic colorings, flavorings, preservatives added to foods now. My son is autistic with ADHD tendancies. He also had terrible ezcema. All my research of food issues (intolerances to foods high in salytic acid) lead me to the Feingold organization (Feingold.org). The food list is daunting but once you get your basic products down...it's pretty easy. My son's ezcema was gone in 9 days. I saw changes in his ability to focus in 2 weeks. I added a good multivitamin as well as an Omega 3-6-9 for juniors. Good luck!
S. in Lisle

I would talk to her teachers and see what they recommend. By law the school has to do the testing. Most peds dont do that. You could go privately but that can cost $$ schools are overwhelmed so there might be a delay so if you think there is a problem talk about it now. Once you have the test results you give that to your ped and they prescribe something. Along with this I would recommend a psychologist some kids just have a low self esteem with this and its good for children to have someone to talk to as well as parents getting ideas to help increase self esteem. There are some groups where kids can get together and talk- liek a buddy club and the children will learn they are not alone. Good Luck!

Forgive but talking to your 10 year old about having an evaluation about something they couldn't possibly understand to the fullest extent may not have been such a good idea. I would only speak to your ped. now and ask for a referral to someone who specializes in this type of need. May I suggest a service called Smart Love Family Services? They have a few offices and the directors have put out many books and were the advice columnist in Chicago Parent Magazine for a very long time.

Just a little about me: Mom of two. My daughter has learning disabilities and childhood depression she's 9. She has been seeing the Smart Love people since she was 6 1/2. I am also a teacher for children with special needs.

Your daughter should be tested by a psychiatrist for ADD/ADHD.

Tell your DD that you don't think she is dumb nor do you think she isn't trying at school. That you think that the reason she is struggling is due to something she can't control and you want her doctor to test to see if that is the case.

I would definitely follow up with your ped. explain to your daughter in simple terms, that you want to make sure that she has the best opportunities in life and you want to be certain about how to deal with things. explain how much you love her etc. Also, keep this evaluation to yourself! If you can avoid letting the school know, the better off your daughter will be.
the schools label kids once, and that label follows them forever. I saw that when volunteering in a high school class.
they label them "special needs" and teachers treat them differently. good luck,