we have a 3 yr old who keeps trying to choke our cat. she has learning problems and she does not comprehend alot of what we say to her so disciplining is a hard one for me. we are so confused as to why she would do this to begin with. is it possible she does not even understand that shes actually choking him.? and second how do we get her to stop doing this? we really dont want to get rid of noah but we will if really needs to be.
any advice would be greatly appreciated.also our daughter is mentally not a 3 yr old. her comprehending component of her brain is not developed and just telling her to be nice and that it hurts the cat she does not understand what we say
Hey Kiddo, why don't you try sitting down with her and talk to her as you do, and hold the cat ,love the cat ,let her see you do it and talk to her about doing it and how good it makes the cat feel, then show her how to treat the cat , example is the best tool .
she could be doing it out of frustation and inability to express herself. but more than likely...my little girl does this...she's trying to play with and love on the cat and is jsut getting to rough and doesn't realize she's hurting the kitty. watch her closely and see what triggers her actions...does she do it after you've scolded her or she didn't get way, or does she start out being nice and playing right and then get rough the kitty cause she's excited, or does the kitty try to scratch or bite her. whatever the cause...when she does it, a good firm "NO! we don't hurt the kitty!" then show her the "right" way to pet the kitty and tell her "we have to play nice and be gentle with the kitty" then put kitty in another room with the door shut for a while so they can both calm down. jsut be consistant and she'll figure it out.
I think that I would get rid of the cat so there won't be a problem plus the cat could hurt her bad if she continued. If she doesn't know any better I think that would solve the problem. You can always get another one when she gets older and can understand better.
Hi! I think you have gotten some wonderful advice here. If she is learning delayed, she has not gotten to the point where she understands she is hurting kitty. A soft, firm "No, we don't hurt kitty. Do it this way" will go far to help her learn. If you are really afraid she won't learn it right away, you may have to separate her and the cat. Maybe a training crate for the cat when you are not supervising?
God bless!
I think the cat needs to go for his own safety...if your daughter does not understand what you are saying to her then that's really probably the only option.
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I have a 4 year old and have seen it to be "typical" behavior to grab cats around the neck. Not being able to reason with your daughter makes it tough. I always react when my son does it, but to be honest, my husband always points out that the cat does not cry or act like he cares (I have 2 cats). So is the cat acting like he is hurt? We really needto know how the cat responds. Does the cat have claws? If so, you will have to treat this the same as other behaviors that you do discipline. Since I don't know the whole picture I am not sure what to say. Maybe if time out works, you immediately put her in time out and then explain why she went there.
I have friends with austic children and could ask what they would do! I would avoid getting rid of that cat if family members are attached to the cat. This would send the wrong message. Do you have a baby gate? Put it up where the cats literbox is and if the cat needs to get away, the cat can jump the gate.
Just an idea - If the cat makes any sounds, she may just be treating it like a squeaky toy, unable to understand it is a live cat and not another toy.
My daughter did the same type of thing. I think it was more of a curiosity experiment for her than wanting to hurt our cat(s). I bought her a stuffed cat and told her that she could pull it's tail or do whatever she wanted because it wasn't real and didn't have feelings and explained that the real cats hurt when she did things to them. It worked and she didn't hurt the cats anymore.
Oh Dear, thats a toughie. I would try to keep her seperated from the kitty, or find him a new home. sounds like she really doesnt know what shes doing, find kitty agood home.
and no,you cannot punish for something she does not understand.
hope this helps
M.
I am so sorry this is happening,is it possible this is her
way of showing love? She just doesn't realize she is not
being easy. Try rubbing the cat saying one word "easy"
doing it over & over again. Maybe by repeating; watching you
she will notice a differance.It may take a while.Sometimes
kids having a hard time,respond better with only using
one word. Good Luck Gina
Dear M.,
I wonder what learning problems exactly your child has. If she is dissabled, I don't believe she knows what she is doing at 3. If it is down syndrome then, of course, she isn't aware of what she is doing. Sometimes children with these kind of problems do not know their own strength or consequence of this sort of behavior. Have you gotten a diagnosis for your 3 year old from a doctor? If she challenged mentally, of course the cat should be placed somewhere so the end result with your little girl won't leave a devistating effect on not only her, but your entire family. Your daughter may do better without pets for the time being. Until she gets a little older and communication skills are more defined is when a pet may be introduced. I wish you luck and feel bad for your problem. I am a pet lover, but also a caring grandmother that believes your child and kitty should be separated for now. I hope to hear how this issue resolves itself. Please place the cat in another home for everyone's sake. Thanks Marily...good luck again. Enjoy your daughter at this young age, they grow up so fast.
i teach preschool and we use the "pet with one finger" approach when dealing with animals...it works pretty well with 4 yr olds..give it a try....
Hello M.,
I would really observe the cat your child and others around the two behavior. Most children memick what they see others do. Your child may think this is playing with the cat. With your 3 yr old you may want to watch behavior and when the child is choking the cat, consistly say no and repeatly show him/her how to pet/love the cat. However animals will respond if they feel threatened. But if the cat has grown with the child surely it will not hurt he/she.
