A Gifted Kid with Special Needs: Any Coping Strategies for the MOM?

I used to work with a program (private) that focused on gifted kids. There are a lot of possible explanations for the focus on the hypotonia rather than the academic subjects. First, the teachers may feel that they need to focus on his fine motor skills first and foremost as this is the window of time in which the most can be achieved in helping him. Also, they may see the handwriting issue as an important first step in any kind of academic acceleration. It is also very likely that the is not much funding for gifted programs at your school for this age....many times there is one special needs budget and the gifted programs get cut before the other special needs programs are cut, which is understandable, but frustrating. FInally, they may want to make sure that your son is not overwhelmed. There is a lot of non-academic content to learn in school for a five year old, with or without special needs and giftedness being part of the deal. I also think it is important to not become super focused on the "gifted" identity when your son is so young. We tend to like to label kids so young and even a positive label can have negative consequences. In the case of giftedness, it can put a lot of pressure on a young child. I would only suggest that you intervene with special curriculum at this age if your son was starting to exhibit disruptive behavior due to being bored in class, which he does not seem to be doing. BTW, many private schools have even less to offer gifted kids and definitely have a harder time accomodating the needs of special needs kids.

A lot of research shows that at this age, parental enrichment can be very helpful for gifted kids. Take your son to museums and concerts. Read to him. Watch history videos with him. Make it fun and let him take the lead with what you explore. If you have other children, they will benefit from this as well.

I am basing all of this on my own teaching experiences, the fact that I was placed in a gifted program as a child (when CA had such a thing) and also the fact that my eldest son is gifted. He is now 12 and we are definitely in the situation that he needs more stimulation and acceleration and so I want you to know that I really do understand your concern and frustration. Gifted kids do need more attention than most schools provide, but you do have a bit of time here. It does sound like your son has great teachers and you are already doing a great job.

My son's 2e (twice exceptional) as well. Actually, that's the fundamental reason that we homeschool.

((ahh.... the difference of having the phrase to google!))

hoagies http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/ for general great gifted info/help

&

http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/what_is_2e.htm &

http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/twice_exceptional.htm

(the first has some great links on the bottom ... but there is also quite a bit more on the hoagies site itself about 2e kids and for parents, see the 2nd link for some of those)

Two tricks that are often used for gifted kids with writing problems is not holding them back to the ability to handwrite, but to
- type
- dictate (see narration down below, but it's just one option amongst many)

That way you're still challenging their mind (so they aren't dying of boredom/ frustration being held back to their most difficult area), while able to make slow measured process with their problem writing. OR NOT. Some kids (dysgraphic, hypotonia, MS, etc.) are NEVER able to handwrite, or are only able to write at a preschool level. Doesn't mean their MINDS should be held back by their disability!!!

And here's the Wrights Law 2e page
http://www.wrightslaw.com/info/2e.index.htm
It is expressly forbidden for kids with disabilites NOT to be allowed into gifted/accelerated classes because of their disability. My son is no Stephen Hawking, but this example may have quite a bit of leverage on your school when they realize what they're doing.

__________
For at home work-arounds surrounding the writing difficulty, check out Charlotte Mason style 'Narration'. For several years we FILMED my son's narrations (he's a little commedian)... but there are dozens and dozens of options which allow a child's mind to grasp the wonder of new things, while the rest of them slowly catches up.

http://simplycharlottemason.com/basics/started/charlotte-... basics about narration

http://simplycharlottemason.com/timesavers/narration/ ideas and examples

Letty's answer is wonderful!

I was VERY frustrated with my son's experience in kindergarten. He was reading several grades above grade level, doing math above grade level as well, and in class they were still working on learning letters. The teacher was not cooperative at all.

After several meetings, the counselor (who is fabulous) set up pull-out sessions for my son and several other advanced students so that they could work with each other and another teacher during a portion of class each day. It worked out very well.

1st grade went much better. They divided the students into groups by ability more often, and it was a great year. He is in second grade now, and is being challenged much more. There are more opportunities for students of all levels. I also think his teachers the past two years have been exceptional.

We also do a ton at home - museums, vacations, lots of reading, creative activities, etc.

I hope you feel better about things after reading Letty's answer, and hope your son gets the education he deserves. :)

*I am also G/T certified, but I teach high school.

A supplement called carnitine really helped my son with small and large motor muscle issues (we worked with an integrative MD for analysis of his needs, dosages, etc.). I love a book by Kenneth Bock, MD and Cameron Stauth called "Healing the New Childhood Epidemics . . . "

I have a "twice gifted" child myself . . . it's one of the big reasons we started homeschooling in 3rd grade (now in 8th). My son's math ability was WAY BEYOND his ability to write out long math problems, etc. He has almost perfect memory AND comprehension with literature . . . as long as the text is READ TO HIM. His visual processing, tracking and convergence are the problems. With years of work with a specialist, he now reads at a high school level. That's something we would likely have never gotten in traditional school. In fact, traditional school was terrible for his confidence. Twice gifted kids flounder in remedial settings, which is where they can be placed mistakenly due to the deficits.

I love this web site: http://www.ldonline.org/indepth/gifted .

Nurture that gifted child every way you can. Those brains are very special. They can and do change the world. JMO.

You said your son has a iep and I know in florida a child with that can apply for a mckay scholarship that gives money towards the child attending a private school. Im not sure if this is offered in every state but thought it might be helpful.

Have you checked into the regular public school? They often have more specialized programs because they have more students.