9 Yr Old and Cell Phones

Sounds like it could start a bad pattern to give in to her desire to look older and cool. I can't think of any reason why a 9 yr old would need a cell phone. Hopefully where ever she may be, she is supervised and there is a phone available to her. Also, do you want to start the annoying, face in the phone 24/7, teenage habit of texting at 9??????????????

Sounds like my daughter. Almost all of her friends had older siblings and it was easier for the parents to get everyone a phone at once and keep the whole family on the same upgrade schedule. My daughter pleaded with me to get her a phone in elementary school. When I started to need her to have a phone she received it. I would wait until middle school or later to get her a cell phone.

I think many kids perceive that all their friends have cell phones, yet most do not at this age. Yes, they would look "older" and "cool", but is that healthy? Parents must be parents, not BFFs. Stand firm. If we give into every whim they will expect us to throw a party with beer included in high school! They'd be "cool" and doing an "older" activity. Don't set that precedent!

one advantage to giving your daughter a cell phone is being able to track her location via GPS.

you can get a low cost plan that allows you to control access.

You can also use the ration of minutes as rewards. If she behaves and does her homework, keeps her grades up, etc. Then you can reward her with extra minutes. Alternately- if she misbehaves you can turn her service off till she gets back on the right side of the tracks.

http://www.kajeet.com/4u/index.html

best wishes!

My daughter got her phone at 9. She really wanted one, and I thought she really didn't need one. We are on a family plan with my mom, and it was only $5 bucks more a month to put her on it, so we did. She was so excited at first, but now she hardly uses it. I have to say, though, that when she is out playing with friends it is nice to be able to call her or have her check in.

It really depends on the family if it's a need or not. For some families it's an absolute necessity, for others it's VERY useful, and for others still it's just an "extra".

In our house, it's a necessity (for several reasons, the least of which is no house line), and kiddo has had one since he was 5 (he just turned 9).

A nice (unintentional) side effect/ benefit of him having one so 'young' (although he had access to mine since he was a toddler and could speed dial myself, my mum, etc.) is that they're NOT cool. They're just boring old normal. You use it to call people. Or text them. Or play music. Or to use as an alarm in the morning. Or, or, or, or. They are as "exciting" as a household landline or cd player or alarm clock or calendar or camera AND the rules got ground in young.

It's also turned out to be DARN useful in ways I hadn't considered when we first got it. He's old enough now (and so much better than I am) that he can do runs on the mountain and no one is standing around at the base (or sitting at the top), and waiting, and waiting, and waiting. Instead; it's NO switching runs without phoning, text (and wait for a reply) before getting on the chairlift. SO USEFUL. Same token, I can pull up the GPS ap on his phone and actually *watch* him go down a run. He was also the first one around a fallen skiier (semi conscious) this winter on a black diamond run and he phoned ski patrol, then phoned me, then waited with the skiier until ski patrol got there. It's not a heavily used run midweek, and it takes about 30-40 minutes to go down it, so the skiier could have been laying there for SOME time before my son even got to him, and 30 minutes more before he rode down to alert ski patrol. Instead, in 1 10 second phonecall, ski patrol was up the run 5 minutes later.

Same token, he and his friends can play army guys in the woods by our house, or he and his cousins (who live on 100 acres) can take the dogs and "go play" for hours (neither of which I would have let him do without a cell until he was older, even though I did the same thing at his age). He can go to the men's room at the baseball stadium, I don't have to shout across 3 soccer fields when he and his friends are running it full length.

So I'm able to give him a LOT more (supervised) freedom, than he would otherwise be allowed to, and I can not only reach him on a second's notice, he can phone for help, or for permission, and failing all of the above; I can GPS the sucker.

In the hospital this spring I could go to the cafeteria without being afraid he'd wake up alone (Don't worry mom, I'll ring you), and his friends could call or video chat him (they were too young for visiting when we were on isolation), and he could call family members (grandparents, dad, etc.) who couldn't be there because they were out of state or at work. (the area code for my husband's work means the room phone wouldn't be able to call it).

At the AMNH kiddo used the museum interactive map to go to the exhibits he wants to. Also in NY or London, he uses the metro or tube maps. He's become VERY good at navigating urban areas (he's also my 'navigator' using the map ap when I'm driving... and SIGH... HE'S the one who figured out how to screen shot his phone and the directions in case we lost signal.

In daily life the people we both call (my parents/ sisters/ brothers/ my husband/his dad/ etc. know from the caller ID who is calling). He uses the voice memo function to record what his homework and assignments are, and then types them into his calendar when he has more time (we're an adhd family). He uses the alarm clock in the morning. The ipod function has all of HIS (aka approved, as we have a rather extensive music library, not all of it he's allowed in) music. He takes photos of zoo scavenger hunts (and so much more). He uses a night sky ap that tells him the names of all the constelations (just point your phone in any direction, and it shows them all, including 'deep sky' if you zoom). The alarm / stopwatch also gets set for electronics time, medication doses, when he wants to hold his breath, the Kindle Free Ap lets him read books while on the bus/ waiting for an appt/ whatever...

The list is near endless. Phones these days are pocket computers, and dirt cheap (his iPhone 3gs cost $50, and is only $10 a month added to our plan, that he pays for himself out of his allowance).

No matter how many other families don't need cell phones, I'm beyond thrilled that ours did, it's so durn USEFUL that kiddo has his own. So beyond thrilled that *I* don't even notice how useful it is unless I stop and think about it, like on a post like this. Because it's become our version of normal.

I don't see a reason for a child to have a cell phone until they begin driving unless they are involved in a lot of extra-curricular activities, they have separated or 2 working parents that share picking them up or dropping them or other type situations. In other words when it might be harder to find a phone and there are chances for "mess ups".
One of my sons' friend has one but it's limited to only being able to call either of his parents, Grandma or one other emergency contact. He's involved in a lot of activities as are his siblings so there is lots of running around and he needs to be able to call if something gets canceled or runs short or whatever. His parents don't even give him the phone unless he's about to go to something, the rest of the time they keep it.
Public pay phones are a thing of the past and sometimes you need a phone. But if it's just to gab about nothing in particular, nope, don't need them. There's a house phone for that or email or *gasp* talk to the person face to face.

Cell phones are a communication tool, not a safety tool and certainly not a fashion accessory.

They can be useful in certain situations. If you have two parties moving independently and under circumstances where scheduling is difficult, cell phones are terrific. I started carrying one when I needed to coordinate with another adult for meet-up times, when either of us could be tied up in traffic for 45 minutes or more.

They can also be dangerous. I have directly observed two situations in which young teenagers in dangerous situations used their phone to call other teenagers for advice instead of getting themselves to a safer location.

My 14 year old does not have a cell phone. She is expected to follow a schedule. She gets a voice as to that schedule, but she is expected to be where she agreed, when she agreed. If she fails to meet this expectation, we go find her and she loses freedom of movement (gets grounded.) If she will be in a situation where this isn't possible, I loan her my phone.

She had a phone once, for a month. She used it to ignore family members by constantly texting and got herself into a dangerous situation that *never* would have occurred if she had been using her brain instead of her phone. She also stole the phone back and lied about it when it was confiscated.

Yes, all her friends have phones and they wish she had one. Tough luck. She will have a phone when she is in a situation where a phone improves her safety and does not compromise it.

The GPS feature only works when the phone is with the child and doesn't have the battery out. Kids who don't want to be tracked simply remove the battery or leave the phone somewhere. GPS is useful for tracking stranded motorists. Standard parenting accountability strategies work just fine for kids.

You may want to check out the new research showing links between cell phones and cancer. Some pretty reputable organizations are agreeing with it (I think WHO?). I'm not an alarmist, but it turns out that children's skulls don't block the radiation in the same way that adults do. Again, check out the research. If you do choose to get her one, at least make sure she has a hands-free device and uses it. Trying to limit her use (once she has one) is probably a losing battle, but do your best to keep it away from her head.

She is fixated on it, for the wrong reasons.
She thus shows, via her reactions to it... that she is NOT 'mature' enough... to handle one/be responsible for one/to use one properly.

She wants to look "cool."
That shows her maturity level.
Not her, discernment about it, nor is she displaying a responsible view of it.

She is trying to keep up with the Jones'. Doing what other kids are doing.... looking cool.... wanting what others have... for the wrong reasons.

Some kids do need cell phones already. And they are responsible about it.
My daughter is 8, and several of her classmates have one. WITHOUT texting though. And they are, responsible kids. Very mature.
They use it, only with their parents, they are not allowed to give out their phone number at all, & they do not. It is, only for calling their parents or 911.

I haven't read your responses, but I'm sure they are varied. Our daughter is only 6, but I can tell you that a cell phone is not in her childhood future. Children's skulls are much thinner than adults and EMF's (radiation) can penetrate much more easily to the brain. A recent studied likened it to frying a child's brain. It was also noted that every cell phone's instruction manual states that cells should be held at least 5/8" away from the body; I daresay most people don't know about this and don't do it. I know the pressure is probably going to be really, really hard for us to stand up to when she starts wanting one due to friends having them, but I'm firm on this one. Unless there are some major advances in the next few years in regards to cell phone safety. It's many neurologists' opinions that cell phones are the next big human health hazard, much like cigarettes and lead paint are considered today. I use a headset on mine and never carry it next to my body, like in a pocket.

No, they don't need a regular cell phone. If you want to get the one that can only dial you and the police... that may be a good idea.

I don't think it's a problem, in theory...for a 9 year old to have a cell phone. However, if it was my child...I would not get her one...so as not to appease her desire to look cool and older. I think it's a real problem she's so concerned with it, and you shouldn't give in just because she asks all the time. That's how it will go form then on, whenever she wants something.

The only reason I see for my child to have a cell phone is if I need to get a hold of them and don't know where they are. Since this won't be happening until my children can drive THEMSELVES around, that's when they can get cell phones.

Until that time, if a situation occurs where I feel that one of my daughters needs a cell phone with her, then she'll take mine. My girls are all under 5, so it's still a while in the future....Or, maybe we'll have a 'family' phone that anyone can take if they *need* it for the day or whatever. But until they have jobs and can pay for it themselves - NO CELL PHONES!!! lol

I realize I'm old school - didn't get a cell til I was at college - but I honestly don't see the need for a 9 yr old to have a phone. When is she somewhere without access to an adult who has a phone? If that happens often, then I suppose it would make sense. And maybe things will be different when our girls are 9 (oldest is 4), but when I was 9, I don't remember being allowed to be without adult supervision. I plan to get them each a phone when they start middle school. We'll see if my strength holds out when the time comes. :)

In this case I would put my foot down and say No. If you daughter's desire for a cell phone is to look 'cool and older' that is NOT the correct reasoning to have one. Do not tell her that, just say when you feel its time she will get it. When the parent needs to contact their child due to some activity or whatever, they could have a spare cell phone in their house and let the child use it, and then take it back after. At 9 kids don't really need one. Its unfortunate that so many kids have lost the art of communication and all they do is text one another - their head down in their phone texting 24/7. I have said to older kids with cell phones 'why don't you just call, it would be so much quicker and there wouldn't be as many misunderstandings...' They say, 'kids do not know how to talk on a phone, they don't know what to say.' I find this really troubling, but true from what I have seen. I would delay the use of a cell till teen years if necessary. The idea I gave about the spare cell can work in the meantime (its not 'her' phone but using it for the occasion) but that I would wait on until she has a more grown up idea about why to carry a cell phone.

I also want to bring up the fact that the younger you start your child on having a cell, the greater the chance they will most likely obtain brain cancer. If you decide to get a phone, search for one with low levels of radiation, and have them always use the speakerphone, not up on their heads. Did you know that you should never hold an infant while on a cell phone ? You can read more here:

http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2007/1...

http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2010/0...

http://search.mercola.com/search/Pages/results.aspx?k=cel...

http://emf.mercola.com/sites/emf/archive/2009/12/01/Leadi...

My personal vote says don't give it to her just because she wants one. She may think it's cool to look and act 'cool', but it is over rated. At the age of 9, she shouldn't be hanging out at the mall or anything like that, so you should always know her whereabouts.

I have told my grand daughter we will talk about her having a cell when she turns 9. I assume that it will be something like what we are using today, the i-phone or Android. The new technology will be so far advanced that they will be very old fashioned by that time.

Our girls are 13 and 14 and have wanted a cell phone since they were 9 and 10. We told them they had no reason to need one, and they didn't, until they were in Junior high and more involved in school activities. We got them their first cell phone last Christmas. It was a total surprise and the way we did it was a total surprise. But we decided that 9 was too young and since they were in elementary school there was no point yet. Hope this helps. Good luck and God Bless.

We do have cell phones. My 16 year old and myself not the 9 yr old. My 16 yr old got one when she was 15 a pay as you go and just before she turned 16 I got a cell phone and added her to my plan. Yes, I lived without one until Sept. of last year. We had some problems with after school activities and decided I needed one. So, my 9 yr old is also fixated on this but she has been told 15 is the magic number. Now that could change depending on circumstances. At this time everywhere we would drop her off or things she would do after school someone has a phone and would call me if things changed. She is too young and yes a few of her friends have phones but not as many as she says there are.....lol so no to 9 year olds and cell phones.

My son got his phone at 9 to 10 years old. We got it mainly to keep in contact with him while he was out and about with friends in our neighborhood. He hardly uses it, but it's there just in case.

My DSD already had one when I married her father, she's 14 now and she uses hers all the time! Mostly texting friends. She even uses it in school, I don't agree, but I am not her mom. She lives in a small town and says she's allowed during certain classes? ugh!

My daughter is not getting a cell phone till highschool. Till that age she can use mine. She might, just might be able to get one in eight grade but she will have to earn that right. My daughter is only 5 years old, so this is way off in the future but we are already putting age limits in her head... 14/15 phone... 16 to drive... 21 to drink.

It sounds like you already have come to the conclusion that she doesn't NEED one, but that she really WANTS one to "fit in" or something. I would just stick to your guns and don't let her feel like it is a subject up for negotiation. My kids will be in 5th and 8th grade this coming August, and neither of them has a cell phone. They don't NEED one. And they know this.

Does she NEED one? Well, no.

Is it a big deal to get her one? Probably not.

She will do what all kids her age do - be super excited about it for a few months (max) and then forget about it.

But, you would be able to keep track of her and get ahold of her a lot easier!

Good luck in your decision. I am glad I don't have kids this age yet!