9 Month Old Still Sleeping with Us.

Hi J.,
Most of my friends that have had this issue told me they tried the crying thing, but really they did not. I will be the toughest week you go through but if you want to tip this in the butt before it is too late. You need to let them cry it out. I know a lot of people don't believe in it. But I did the Cry method & my kid is the best sleeper. If he is not tired he will play in his crib for a while & when he wakes up he will play by himself till I go in. Good luck & i hope you find the best way for you.

Do whatever it takes to get her out of your bed!! Take heed! My SIX YEAR OLD comes in our room! If we had just "sucked it up" when he was 9 months old we wouldn't have this problem. Let her cry it out - it will be brutal for up to a week, but it will be good for her - my son can't sooth himself back to sleep.... she will ultimately have better sleep in the long run if she learns to sooth herself.

I have a two year old who has never seen the inside of our bed! :-)

J.,

I would read the sleep book "Sleeping thru the Night" by Jodi Mindell. She gives really great advice and ways to get your little one to sleep on their own and getting them to sleep thru the night.

L. M

Hi J.,

i just moved my 13 month old out of our bed. I stayed in her room for a few nights so she would see me if she woke up. Basically I did all of our normal night time routines and then I moved her into her crib. The first night was pretty bad, but since then she hasn't even cried much. I rub her back and talk soothingly to her, but I don't pick her up. I only started this a little over a week ago, and she is already doing great (knock on wood).

I think the most important thing to keep in mind is this really has to be the right time for you to make the move. I have been thinking about it with my daughter for a few months, but I wasn't ready to take the plunge until recently. If you are at all unsure, the baby will be able to pick up on it. There are lots of different methods - cry it out, modified cry it out, pick up/put down etc - you just need to figure out what works best for yours and your baby's personality. Just be consistent in whatever you decide. I knew I wouldn't be able to stick to cry it out and would cave in, but I also knew my little girl is strong willed it wouldn't take to the change without a little balking. So for me, it worked to be with her while she made the adjustment.

Good luck! if you can be strong for a few nights, it should get better!

Perhaps "The No Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley may be helpful. The book is about how to get babies to sleep and to stay asleep gently. It is not an overnight solution, but neither is CIO. Since you have tried the crying thing, and it didn't work for you, I definitely suggest getting the book.

Really since she has been sleeping with you for several months, it is unreasonable to expect her to just go along with suddenly sleeping alone, so it will take some work. Also remember that babies are biologically inclined to want to sleep with mothers, eons have designed them this way as they cannot take care of themselves. So it takes a lot of patience and may take trying a number of different things to get her sleeping on their own. You do not have to force your baby to CIO to get her to sleep alone.

look at the dr sears nighttime parenting book

Hi - Both of mine basically co-slept until they were between 8 mos - 1 year. I just transitioned my now 15 month old to her crib just before her 1st bday. For the few months leading up to it, I had been putting her down at bedtime in her own crib. If you're not doing that yet, I would start with it. If you haven't already, work to establish your night-time routine so she knows what's next & what to expect. Now we're at the point where I can put her down & she just goes to sleep (usually... it's blissful!), but it's not an easy process. Be prepared fro some crying, and while I'm not a full on believer in CIT, I think some crying is okay & to be expected. When she cried at bedtime or when she woke up in the middle of the night (and even still if/when she wakes in the middle of the night) I always give her at least 5-10 mins to cry and more often than not she falls back to sleep.

When I stopped bringing her into my bed, I would go into nurse her... cuddle her, then put her back down, and let her cry if she cried. I spoke comfortingly & gently, told her it was okay and that it was nighttime... Shockingly, it only took us about a week til she was sleeping on her own through the night. Take you time and be prepared for being pretty tired that first week. Good luck!!

Hi J.. I have some tips for you, and I hope it helps.

Since you work full time, start the new sleep process on a Fri. Your LO has been sleeping with you both for 5 months, so don't expect this to work in a week. You may be sleep deprived for a couple of weeks - even more so - but then things will get easier for all of you.

If you work on this issue sometimes, let her sleep in your bed sometimes, sometimes not, etc, and go back and forth - it will NOT work. you MUST be consistent, patient and diligent! BUT this will allow for little if any crying.

Bring a blow up bed, or futon or whatever it is into HER room. Sleep with her there for a few nights.

After she gets used to that, put her in her crib, and lay down next to her. I used to use a stool, sit on it, and lay my torso down in my LO's crib. Once she falls asleep, sleep on the blow up bed so when she wakes and starts crying you can comfort her. Once she starts getting used to that - go back into your own bed! When and if she wakes at that point, go to her, rub her back, say good night and leave the room. You might have to go in and out several times, or sleep on her floor again until this works.

It will take a couple of weeks, but stick to it, and good luck!