8 Week Old Infant Won't Sleep in Crib

Updated on August 02, 2008
S.M. asks from Madison, WI
29 answers

My 8 week old baby will not sleep in his crib. I'm having the most problems with getting him down for naps as he wants to sleep in the Baby Bjorn or while lying on someone. Swaddling has helping some what at night but we don't want him swaddled all of the time. He does display some colicky behaviors but I think that he is also just over- tired due to not getting enough sleep during the day. I have a two year old and just cannot hold him all of the time. Any suggestions??

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So What Happened?

I want to thank everyone for their help!!!! We are slowly making progress... Our son is now 11 weeks old and he sleeps in his crib all night swaddled. Also, we've been able to get him down around 9PM rather than 11PM. I have been able to get him to take short naps in his crib, otherwise he sleeps in the swing.
The most important thing is that he's getting more sleep! Thanks so much for recommending The Happiest Baby on the block DVD. Sleeping through the Night by Dr. Jodi Mindell was also recommended and is an excellent book.

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T.V.

answers from Lincoln on

It's probably because there is to much room in the crib. He's used to being in tight quarters before he was born. Maybe if you try a bassinet that would help. That's what I did for all 4 of my boys until about 6 months or when they got to big for it, then we moved them to the crib. Maybe you could try that. Good Luck.

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K.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

2 of my boys didn't like their crib for awhile, but they did like to sleep in their car seat, and the pediatrician said that was fine. You might want to try that. Good Luck!

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B.M.

answers from Minneapolis on

My daughter used a boppy pillow for her youngest who had the same problem, he was very colicy also. He got past both, after a few months. Her other two slept in car seats for the first month, they also graduated to cribs with no problem. Good luck
nana

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M.I.

answers from Duluth on

babies need to be held. they were in the nice warm womb for 9 months, thats all they know. the first 3 months is sometimes called the 4th trimester because of the immaturity of the baby... they dont understand that they are even separate from mom!

im sure your baby will adjust to sleeping in her bed after a while. until then i recommend just using the sling as much as possible, or use a swing or other soothing baby seat. you could also have someone you trust come over and hold baby for a while when you really need to get something done. (or you can hold baby while they do something for you)

the first few months, and the first year, are VITAL to your relationship. how you react to your child during the first year will affect who they become, and how they react to different situations in life.

my son would accept no substitutes to sleeping with and near me at all times, no matter what, so that made for an very exhausting first few months. he still coslept with us continually until around 15 months old or so, then he would sleep in his bed until around 4 or 5 am, and then he wouldnt go back to sleep until he was in bed with us. it was the only way anyone would ever get any sleep after that, and i was desperate to do the things that would get us all the most sleep. in the big picture, its only for a VERY short period of time that they need you this much! you wont regret doing whatever it takes... and your baby will thank you by building the love and trust that babies need !

www.askdrsears.com is a good resource for healthy attachment parenting. they also have many good books. check them out!

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T.L.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi S.
I put a pillow under the mattress of my sons crib. I also used a heating pad to warm up the sheets. This is the only way he would sleep. he also liked to be half swaddled so his arms were out. Good Luck T.

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J.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

I had the same problem with my son - now 14 months. Do you have a baby swing? If you do, you might want to try having him nap in the swing. I'm sure that most of the reason he likes to be in the Bjorn is because he's close to you, but it might be the movement or it could be that he's in a more up-right position. Just a suggestion - good luck!

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J.E.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi S.,
Wow, can I remember those days! My son is 2 1/2, so it only seems like yesterday. If swaddling works, I'd do that for naps, too. We learned some amazing (and simple) sleep techniques for infants in the "Happiest Baby on the Block" book, and swaddling is one of the key components. It's a really quick read, but you can also get the video for it. You won't spoil him or make any bad habits by swaddling--they eventually grow out of it when they are ready! I highly recommend that book!

Good luck!
Jen

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T.S.

answers from Waterloo on

There are 2 things available on Walmart.com that may help you. I tried 1 and it worked AWESOME! They are called Basic Comfort Supreme Sleep Positioner or The First Years Airflow Infant Sleep Positioner. 1 is more expensive but makes the baby feel more like they are being held. Hope this helps!

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C.R.

answers from Minneapolis on

Have you considered babywearing? It sounds like your baby might enjoy the closeness of being worn in a sling. I did this with my daughter as it was the only way to get her to nap anywhere other than our bed. You can find some great ones at www.lucky-baby.com and www.goo-ga.com. If you're interested in a more expensive option that will be usable when the baby is bigger, try www.ergobaby.com.

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J.O.

answers from Wausau on

Mine would not sleep in his crib either- just in his swing, bouncy seat thingy, or on someone.

We discovered at 1 1/2 yrs old he is lactose intolerant. Once we eliminated all dairy, his sleeping improved dramatically.

We also have done co-sleeping almost since the beginning since he was such a "bad" sleeper.

I would recommend investigating lactose intolerance if he is gassy or seems in pain at night; possible acid reflux if he sleeps better sitting up; letting him sleep in the baby swing (turned on or not) if it helps you and him sleep! or trying co-sleeping if thta is something you would be comfortable with. (Be warned- co-sleeping is a hard habit to break! we're still co-sleeping part of every night at 2 1/2 yrs old).

Best of luck- do what you have to in order to get enough rest for yourself- even if it means having someone babysit so you can nap.

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C.D.

answers from La Crosse on

Your baby needs to sleep next to you, because that is clearly what he wants. Environmentally, the crib is the exact opposite of the womb; to compare it with something, a newborn sleeping in the crib would be like one of us suddenly having to sleep outside on an army cot rather than in our own soft bed with our comfy sheets next to the one we love. For better rest for everyone and a continuing sense of security for your infant, you can continue that wonderful togetherness he (and you) felt in the womb, through cosleeping. Of course, just like everything else there are safety guidelines for cosleeping: http://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/T102200.asp
Good luck.

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L.D.

answers from Waterloo on

My little girl was the same way....do have access to a bassinet?....Emily was scared of the large crib....but if I swaddled her and put her in the bassinet....she went without much fuss....hope this helps

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A.R.

answers from Minneapolis on

This trick works well: put a pillow underneath him as you nurse/feed him. Once asleep, roll him over onto his tummy so that his head is dropped slightly (his head will easily turn to the side this way). Then simply pick up the pillow and put him where you want him to sleep.

If he is accustomed to sleeping with someone in the middle of the house where all of the activity is, go ahead and let him sleep there. However, getting him adjusted to a quiet dark room away from the activity will be a good idea if this doesn't help him to stay asleep.

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J.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

At 8 weeks old - don't worry if he sleeps in his crib - be more concerned about having him get sleeps. He wants the closeness - our neighbors actually put there daughter in her car seat and put that in her crib! if he will sleep in the baby bjorn - let him and it will allow you time with your other son

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L.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

Our daughter didn't sleep in the crib for naps until she was 3 months old. We just kept putting her in there and of course she would wake up right away. Eventually she learned that this is where she sleeps. I let her nap in her bouncy chair a lot at first. If swaddling helps, do it. Eventually he will be to wiggling to keep swaddled but until then I think it's fine.

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T.R.

answers from Minneapolis on

My son was the same way and didn't sleep in his crib until he was 3 months old. We continuously "practiced" at nap time and putting him on his side using a wedge or rolled up receiving blankent helped a lot. He had a lot of gas issues as well, so we think this helped. At 6 years old now, he's always slept on his stomach, so I think the back thing bothers a lot of babies.

He also loved to be held constantly and looking back I'm wondering if we should have tried finding one of those toys/box that plays the sound of a heartbeat. I heard about it too late, but thought that probably would have made it easier for him to "transition from the womb."

Good luck, but you should hopefully be over the hump in a few more weeks. Three months seems to be when they make a big hurdle in a lot of areas.

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S.S.

answers from Omaha on

I finally had to put my son on his stomach in the crib. Against all advise from today's professionals. But it worked and we all survived it!

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L.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

I had the exact same problem with my daughter. At 7 weeks I tried putting her to sleep in her carseat instead of her bassinette/crib. It worked like a charm! She slept 5 hours the first night and 6 hours the second night. Within 2 weeks she was sleeping through the night. She slept in her carseat until she was 5 months old. I am assuming the carseat made her feel more secure the same way that swaddling does. It was my pediatrician who recommended the carseat.

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S.C.

answers from Minneapolis on

Scroll through the list of questions and find "7-week-old won't sleep on her back" from 6/30/08. I received a lot of really helpful responses...hopefully theu can help you too. Good luck!

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B.I.

answers from Des Moines on

I had a similar problem recently... my son is now 14 weeks and we've cracked it!
Basically there are a ton of things you can try- you are his mom you know best, but I'll tell you what worked for me. and I did work really hard at it because I think it is best for my son to put himself to sleep independently so when he wakes up he can put himself back to sleep- thus he and the whole family get a better sleep. It is basic behavior modification.
I knew he was overtired so I did whatever it took to help him catch up on some sleep. whether it was hold him, plop him in the swing, whatever. I had to hold him for a few full naps. (That will be harder for you with a two-year-old at home.)
Once he was caught up on some sleep we started with sleep training.
I found it was important to start before he was too tired, or else he might end up crying hard. so i would start at the first sign of tiredness. at 8 weeks most infants can only manage 50-60 minutes awake time.
I would then rock or hold him until almost asleep, place him in his crib and continue to sing, stroke, pat, whatever, until he feel asleep. The next time I would do the same and stroke him until he was nearly asleep and then stand there until he was asleep. Each time I backed out a little earlier, trying to push him to be just a baby-step more independent. Sometimes we took big-steps backwards, and sometimes it worked like a charm. The goal was to have him begin to associate the crib and other objects around him with sleep, instead of being held or being with mom. but if you take away the latter associations before he has grasped the former it can be too much and you'll likely have a lot of crying. it has to be a gradual release and replacement of associations. If you go too fast he will have a rougher adjustment. we tried to always sleep him in the same position with the same things around him... so he could learn that meant 'sleep'.
Speaking of which, there were some times he went right to sleep without crying and other times he cried for about twenty minutes no matter what I did (never too hard though because I put him down before he was too tired- just protest cries.)
It was a long process. In the end he developed his own sleeping pattern, As your baby probably will. now He just wants to get into his crib so he can cry for ten minutes and then go to sleep. It has got to the point where if I try to hold him to put him to sleep he is too stimulated and just cries.
There are plenty of parents who simply put their child down and don't pick them up again until after they wake up. I don't see anything wrong with it really but I just don't like a lot of crying so I went with this gradual approach... if you are ok with a lot of crying then just do it all at once. Put him down and refuse to pick him up. That's too much for me though!
As for the swaddling... My son hates it during the day although he is fine with it at night. I continued to swaddle him however up until recently because I wanted him to learn to sleep in the crib before i started taking the swaddling away. (didn't want to change too many associations at once). if I could go back I might not have swaddled him so long because he doesn't like it. but it might have taken him longer to learn to sleep in the day because he had learned that swaddling meant sleep. I'm sure you'll figure out what is best for your son. I wanted to start training early so I wouldn't have to have him cry it out later. do what you feel is best. I recently read about sleep associations in Jodi Mindell's "sleeping thought the night". It may help. good luck!

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E.C.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi S.. I have a 9 week old who still sleeps in a moses basket at night. During the day she sleeps in her swing/bouncy seat or moses basket. She has slept in her crib once, maybe twice for a nap. But I have noticed when I put her in her crib, even when I put her there after she falls asleep, she always seems to stir or wake up altogether. I think that at 8 weeks the wide open space of a crib may not be secure enough for your son. If you really want him in the crib, then I suggest you go the swaddling route. Every baby is different and even though your oldest child may not have needed to be swaddled or maybe they were able to sleep in their crib just fine from the get go, your infant son may have different wants/needs when it comes to sleeping. I think he is too young to be manipulative when it comes to his sleeping patterns and therefore doing whatever makes him comfortable enough to fall and stay asleep would behoove you. Summary - by all means, swaddle him! Good luck. :)

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N.K.

answers from Green Bay on

My son, now 19 months, was just like that. He always wanted to sleep either on my husband or my chest. The swing and the vibrating infant chair worked for him. Also you can try putting your son in a baby holder (the ones that have padding on either side so that they can't roll over) in the crib...that helped with my daughter, I guess she felt more secure. Also try the stuffed animals that play the sound of the human heartbeat...it may remind him of being on your chest and listening to your heart beating. I hope this helps!

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S.P.

answers from Minneapolis on

Sounds just like my little boy who is now 3 years.
1)Go ahead and swaddle him - it worked like a charm for my son even at 6 months of age for his naps.
2) Investigate the colicky behavior - is it more evident after eating? My son was very gassy and uncomfortable until I stopped eating gluten (he nursed) and then he was much more comfortable.

or plan B
I wore my daughter in a sling constantly so I could keep up with her active 4 year old brother. She never slept in a crib (at night she slept with me). She started walking at 9 months old and hasn't stopped since!

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C.K.

answers from Des Moines on

HI S.,

Is this something that you have just started to do, or has it been a problem from day one??

It may take a few days, but if you consistently put him to bed he will soon get use to the idea...and believe me, he will sleep better.

I encourage all of my new parents to put their children to bed for naps and bedtimes from day one. The main reason is that it is better for them...who is going to want to hold their child to go to sleep when they are 2 and 3 years old? Why have to put them through a tramatic change, when you get tired of it, instead of just starting out by putting them to bed. They need their quiet time, and so do parents. It makes life so much nicer for everyone, and you have a much happier baby.

If you are serious about this just start putting him to bed...make sure he is dry and his tummy is full...you may have a few trying days, but it will be well worth it. In a few months, you will hardly remember that it was any different....I promise, you will love it.

C.

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N.L.

answers from Omaha on

My daughter had a tough time transitioning to the crib as well. Sometimes before I layed her in the crib I would put a heating pad on the sheets to warm them up. When the heating pad trick didn't work I would put her Boppy pillow in the crib and let her sleep on that...I know it's not recommended to do this but it worked. Also, I would try to lay her in the crib when she was just about to fall asleep this way she wasn't use to me putting her to sleep everytime before bed. Now she is 20months and I am able to just lay her down and she falls asleep all on her own. Good Luck!

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T.C.

answers from Minneapolis on

you could mabye try a sleep positioner. my son would not sleep good either unless he was in his sleep positioner (he likes to cuddle up with something and feel secure). he is also a mover so the sleep positioner helped him from moving all over the crib. he also sleeps better with the crip mattress elevated a bit. i just put a couple of towels underneath one end. now he is almost 1 and does just fine with his little blankie to cuddle up with. good luck hopefully you can find something to work for you both.

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D.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

Is his room drafty or too cold from ac. I had no trouble getting five of mine to sleep in their cribs and for naps so I figured the sixth one would just fall in line. He didn't! He would cry every time he went into his crib. I finally figured out that the window in his room was drafty. I think he was just cold.

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S.F.

answers from Madison on

We swaddled both our daughters for naps and night time until they were 4-5 months old. If swaddling works for your son at night, why not continue to do it for naps as well?

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B.

answers from Minneapolis on

Some babies just don't like lying down, and some really don't feel comfortable unless they are in a confined space. My daughter slept in a swing or carseat until she was 6 months old. My son liked to be swaddled and sleep in a bassinet. If you try different things you should find some other way your baby likes to sleep besides being held. Isn't it a bummer that you have the first one and think you know some things until the second comes along and is nothing like the first? Good luck. You'll get to know the ins and outs of this one too.

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