8 Month Old Still Won't Hold His Own Bottle

Updated on May 27, 2008
J.E. asks from Bedford, TX
32 answers

I've been reading about transitioning to a sippy cup and realized that it may be abnormal for my son to still be making me hold his bottle while feeding him. I can get him to use a sippy cup somewhat, but I still have to hold it for him. The main problem (besides perhaps laziness) is that he doesn't hold the bottle up so that he can actually drink from it whenever he does decide to try and hold it. Has anyone else had this issue?

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So What Happened?

Thank you all for your responses. It's nice to know that others have had (or are having) this experience too. It's even nicer to know that it's not something I should really be concerned about.

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T.D.

answers from Dallas on

I had the same problem when my 6 year old son was a baby. Eventually, someone asked me why he needs to learn to hold his bottle when I will always do it for him? This was one of my first sobering moments of motherhood -- sometimes you have to let go and let them try it on their own -- even if they stumble. It is hard to let go and let him do it, but at 8 months old, he certainly has the muscle capability to do it. And he will not starve. He may be a little irritated a couple of times because you have switched up his routine -- but he will get used to it -- making a happier baby and happier mom. ;-) Good luck and enjoy these days. My baby is now 6 . . .

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B.C.

answers from Dallas on

My daughter did the same thing until she was 17 months. It is not laziness, he just wants you to do it. Enjoy that, it won't last too much longer. My daughter is 2 now and won't let me do anything for her. (sigh)

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D.N.

answers from Dallas on

J.,

My daughter is 9 months old. She has just started to hold her bottle upright this week so that the milk flows all the way out the nipple. I think it just takes some kids longer to get this concept than others. There are so many changes that happen so quickly that I wouldn't worry about the sippy cup issue. If he's 13 months instead of 11 months old when he uses the sippy cup correctly then what's 2 months? He will catch on sooner or later and sometimes even though we are ready for them to do something the kids have a different schedule. Hope this helps!

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A.K.

answers from Dallas on

I had the same problem with my son. I really loved our special cuddling time together while I fed him, so I know it was my fault. I loved holding him close and holding the bottle for him, so I didn't encourage it enough. The only time I was frustrated about it was when we were in the car and he wanted/needed a drink. I couldn't really hold it and drive, so we both got frustrated. Really, I don't remember if he ever held the bottle- he was weaned from it by 13 months. I think he did fine holding the sippy cup, but I'm not sure. Like I said, it was frustrating in the car, but the rest of the time, I wouldn't have traded it for our cuddle time together. I say enjoy it as long as you can, especially if you don't have other kids that might need your attention or whatever. The more you encourage him to hold it himself, the more he'll get it. He'll definitely hold the cup on his own someday, so don't worry about it. He's still a baby, so let him be one, I say. Just my opinion. My son is 3.5yo now and I can't hold him in a snuggle for very long at all now- he's too busy doin' stuff!

1 mom found this helpful
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K.M.

answers from Dallas on

If it's any consolation, my twins didn't hold their own bottles until they were 11 months old. They didn't know to hold them UP either. Hang in there, it will happen soon...

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U.A.

answers from Dallas on

I had the same worry, but I don't think it's abnormal. Just encourage him how to hold it and eventually he will (and then you'll worry about how to get it away from him! :-)

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J.T.

answers from Dallas on

i never allowed my kids to hold their bottles - i didn't want them to get into the habit of toting their bottles around. around 9 months of age, i began letting them tote around a sippy cup of water, but that's it - i didn't want any potential "bottle rot" issues or an attachment to the bottle other than as a source of nourishment.

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C.C.

answers from Dallas on

I doubt there is anything wrong with your son. My daughter is 16 months old and still won't hold her own cup! Pure laziness on her part, and I know I'm enabling her.

Anyway, eight months old is a great age to start. Just keeping working with him. Right now, he may not have enough arm strength to hold up a full bottle/sippy cup. Recline him a bit to make it easier.

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S.M.

answers from Dallas on

Neither of mykids could hold it on their own well at that age and neight of the boys I watch could either. I totally wouldn't worry about it for a while :)

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S.B.

answers from Dallas on

I wouldn't worry about it too much. My son is 17 months old and I don't think he held his cup completely on his own where he wasn't insisting to have our help until about 2-3 months ago. It is not that he couldn't before that, because he would off and on months before, but I think it was a not wanting to completely pass that stage of growing up. I think he loved being babied still in this way, and every once in a while still does. But he also loves the fact now that he not only can he drink from his sippy cup on his own, but walk and drink from his cup at the same time. He thinks he is so big when he does that. I know it is frustrating because you feel like this is something that he should be doing already, but as I am learning sometimes your kids have there own time line and they will do the next steps for them when they are good and ready. I think sometimes we forget that all these things that they are learning seem like little steps to us, but may seem big to them. He will figure out how to hold it right side-up, and how to tilt the cup back far enough to get a drink. Just give him time, because that is a lot of balance and cordnation he is learning all at once.

S. B.

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A.A.

answers from Dallas on

My son is almost a year and would rather cry and make me hold his bottle than pick it up on his own and drink it. He CAN do it because Ive seen him. He can hold cups too but when its bottle time, he likes me to hold it. He will be off the bottle VERY soon, so Ill let him (and me) enjoy it for a frew more times.

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S.T.

answers from Dallas on

My mother always told me you should never let a baby hold his own bottle because it makes a bond between you and the baby for you to feed him the bottle. It makes you be sure to handle him enough. I have an idea that may not be based in fact. Breast feed babies have IQ's that are higher than bottle babies and it may not be just the milk, of course it would wise to use formula that has all the right things in the product. But I think it's also because breast babies have to be held to be feed. If you are worried about developemental problems it is wise to have and good pediatrician.

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E.W.

answers from Dallas on

My kids NEVER EVER held bottles on their own, and they're totally fine. My older child (now 3-1/2) switched to sippy cups at 10 months. However, we used the Nuby cup with the soft spout (basically, it's a glorified bottle, just a spout shape instead of a nipple shape... :) ). Even then, I had to hold it for her until she started drinking out of straw cups. My younger daughter, now 15 months, switched entirely to sippy cups (the kind with the handles) at a year. She holds her own cups but, prior to that, I ALWAYS had to hold her bottles for her. I don't think it's abnormal AT ALL. To me, 8 months old and not holding their own bottles isn't a big deal in the slightest. We put way too much pressure on ourselves I think :) .

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K.M.

answers from Dallas on

Hi J.,

Just wanted to add that my first son is 1 year old and has never held his bottle. When we transitioned him to sippy's he had the problem with not knowing to lift the sippy up and over to get the juice/milk out of it...so we worked around it and got him those sippy's that have the straws in them...he knows how to get the juice/milk in it from the straw! :) Works great! At first he didnt hold the sippy himself either...but he caught on eventually. Just takes practice.

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E.M.

answers from Dallas on

J.,
My son never held his bottle. I gave him a bottle up til he was 15 months, and he NEVER once held it. By 10 months, he would hold a sippy cup perfectly, but refused to hold his bottle that I gave him once a day after turning a year old. I just enjoyed the time that it gave us together and realized that soon he would be off of bottles completely and that I would miss our cuddle time together. Enjoy it, these moments pass so quickly.

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L.M.

answers from Dallas on

It's not abnormal at all. Some babies can do it at 6 months. My boys were lazy about that too, and both were almost 10 months before they started holding the bottle on their own, and we had to make them lay down at first instead of trying to get them to tip it up. Don't worry about it. My kids were way ahead in other areas, and right on time on the rest, so I wasn't too concerned. I've also heard it takes boys longer to learn to hold a bottle, but haven't been able to test that theory since my baby girl isn't here yet.

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J.S.

answers from Dallas on

My daughter is doing the same thing. I have talked to other mom friends of mine that have the same issues. My daughter is my first so I have no tips, but I can commiserate. :)

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T.K.

answers from Abilene on

By any chance did you use playtex nursers for bottles? They do not have to hold the bottle at any certain angle to get what they want, they just suck. I had the same problem with my kids, and I just had to let them figure it out on their own, it was sad and frustrating and I felt cruel, but if I kept helping, he was not goign to get it. Don't worry, this too shall pass, until the next thing comes along anyway! Good Luck!

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J.H.

answers from Dallas on

I had the same problem with my daughter and my friend had the same problem with her son. Don't worry, they eventually learn to hold it up on their own. I know it's annoying but think of it this way, when he doesn't need you to do this for him anymore you'll probably miss it. I know I do.

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B.D.

answers from Dallas on

I have a son who just turned one last week and he didn't start holding his own bottle until he was about 10 1/2 months old. I, too, was a little worried because my other two started doing so pretty early. I think his thoughts were, "Why should I? I've got somebody to do it for me?" Yours will come around when he's ready. Just enjoy him and everything else new he is doing!!

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C.T.

answers from Dallas on

I wouldn't worry about it ... he'll hold it when he wants to. My son (now 14 months) was also slow to hold his bottle and sippy. I think it had to do with the fact that he very rarely cuddles ... or even slow down! Milk time was one of the very few times when he'd just relax and be held. He would drink water from a sippy by himself (which would just be available at meal and other times) long before he'd drink his milk by himself. For the first few months he'd have trouble orienting in correctly, so I would help him out there, but now he's got it down.

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A.B.

answers from Dallas on

My son didn't hold his own bottle until he was almost one! Out of pure laziness I think. :)
He now uses his sippys fine. I've also heard that if they don't hold their own bottle that the transition is supposed to be easier. Be blessed that he still needs you cause it will happen so fast that he won't. :(

Good luck.
A.

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E.B.

answers from Dallas on

My little one is almost ten months and he sometimes holds his a sort of. I didnt know that them holding their bottle so young was a miles stone. The bottle is too heavy for him to hold correctly alone...he dosent tip it up enough. When he finishes I let him hold the empty bottle and play with it. He generally just chews on the nipple, but it gives him practice holding it. I wouldnt worry about it. He will hold it sooner or later but maybe not until after he is a little older.

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M.V.

answers from Abilene on

I would put water in a sippy cup and then just leave it laying with my kids toys throughout the day. They played with it and eventually started drinking out of it. It was worked with all 3 of mine. Just be patient and he'll figure it out! :-)

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C.J.

answers from Dallas on

Our daughter, who is now 15 months old, wouldn't hold her bottle herself until she turns one. Why should they hold it when we hold it for me. That's kinda how Kaitlyn seemed to us. She didn't everything with her hands but touch that bottle. I know that we should have already transitioned her into a sippy cup. We were so excited that she held the bottle on her own at one that we just now started working on the sippy cup thing. She definitely likes her bottle much better.

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M.A.

answers from Dallas on

Be happy he is not holding it...it will make weaning much easier. We never let our twins hold their own bottle. Then, when it was time to wean them, it went very smoothly because there was no attachment to the bottle. Teach him to hold his own sippy cup though! =) Good luck!

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S.M.

answers from Dallas on

Yes, I recently went through the same thing. Don't worry or push it - he'll eventually do it on his own. Took my youngest about 10 months. There are no definite time lines - they just give you ages for certain milestones as a guide.

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L.M.

answers from Dallas on

That should be the least of your worries! My son (now 4) was the exact same way!!! He never once held his bottle, and he took the bottle until he was 16 months old! He did fine with a siipy cup too.... Now on the other hand my daughter(now 15 months) she is totally different! She is very independent and has held her bottle since she could figure out that that thing was going to give her what she wanted! I think my son was just lazy and he was our first so we babied it :) I actually liked holding it for him and miss holding it for my daughter :) Hope this helps!

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R.F.

answers from Dallas on

I would not worry yet. My 15 month old just started holding her sippy cup to drink. The doctor had said there was nothing wrong with her she just did not want to do it. I did notice that sometimes if I was holding her in my lap she would be able to hold the cup and actually drink from it.

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M.R.

answers from Dallas on

I don't think you need to sorry about this. My daughter never held her own bottles really. However, after teaching her the sippy cup starting around 6-7 months, (we held it for her for a while like a bottle) she did it on her own. She was great at holding it but it took a while to learn the "tilt" to get the milk/water out. He'll get it!!

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A.G.

answers from Dallas on

My daughter never held her bottle. We transitioned her to a sippy cup at 12 months old and she held it during the day, but still wanted me to hold it for her with her milk when she woke up and before bedtime. She's now 17 months old and won't ever let me hold it! I miss the days when she wanted to snuggle and let me feed her. Enjoy it while it still lasts!

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A.C.

answers from Dallas on

I went through the same thing with my son who is now 4. He started walking around nine months and would walk over and get his bottle and bring it to me to feed him. : ) I can't really say I did anything to make him hold it himself accept maybe encourage him to do it during feedings by letting go. I wouldn't worry about it. It will happen. He might enjoy the one on one snuggly time with you!

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