I feel your pain! I'm not sure I have too much advice for you, but I have lots of empathy.
My 8.5 mo old son just got over a 3+ week food strike. Absolutely would not eat anything except Cheerios and Gerber Puffs. I was back to nursing every 2.5-3 hours around the clock. Not fun. Just when I thought my milk supply was disappearing and had to start supplementing with formula. I was distraught over the emotional disappointment of thinking I wouldn't be able to nurse him anymore. Now, I'm back to full, engorged, lumpy breasts, and my supply of breast milk in the freezer is filling up again. (My picky son will drink formula, but not breast milk, out of his sippy cup.)
He started solids at 5.5 weeks and absolutely loved everything. Couldn't get enough of it. Then he, one day, wouldn't eat cereal. Pushed it away and clamped his mouth shut. Wouldn't have anything to do with it no matter what I mixed it with (even his absolute favorites sweet potatoes or avocados). So I started giving him Cheerios and those Gerber Sweet Potato flavoured Puffs to get him his iron. As soon as he learned to put Cheerios in his mouth himself, that was the end of any other food. I tried even cutting up little pieces of sweet potato/bananas/avocados thinking he was ready to feed himself, and he'd just gag and spit it out. Even with the Cheerios, he'd only eat 6-7 pieces. I just kept trying, and wasting a lot of food, and asking everyone in sight what to do. He still seemed healthy and was very active (similar to your daughter, crawling non-stop and standing and now cruising) but was losing weight. Then, 3 days ago, he decided to open his mouth again. Don't know why and I can't explain it. Now he's practically non-stop eating again. Maybe he just needed to be the center of attention and have everyone talking about him :-)
Babies under 1 year get almost all of their calories and nutrition from breast milk or formula. Eating is just to get them to learn to eat and explore and have fun with different tastes. Have you seen how few calories are in a jar of baby food? Like only around 40 in a 4 oz. jar. Alternatively, breast milk and formula contain 20+ calories per ounce. The one thing is that solely breastfed babies start to lose their natural stores of iron at about 6 months, so supplementing with iron-fortified foods such as formula or cereal or meat is actually a good thing. (Not to scare anyone, but my friend's healthy eating 9 mo old breastfed daughter just was diagnosed with anemia and now needs iron supplements).
About solid food for babies: No egg whites--they contain the protein that may be allergenic. Just egg yolks. Also, no straight milk until a year as well, although yogurt/cheese/cottage cheese may be introduced carefully (a few of my friends started whole milk at 11 months because they'd already been feeding yogurt, cheese, and cottage cheese successfully). You're from Aiea, so have you tried poi yet? I heard babies like that, and it's a good complex carb that's easily digestible. Maybe try fresher poi since it's not so sour.
And, don't feel bad about using jarred baby food. I do both jar and homemade. My son actually prefers some types of jar over my cooking... whatever... it gets him to eat. He prefers the Earth's Best Organic (maybe you can't get this in stores in Hawaii--you can from diapers.com though) and Beechnut over the Gerber. I'm out a lot, so I don't have to worry about an unopened jar spoiling like I do my homemade and frozen food. All of my friends do homemade, freeze their food in an ice cube tray, store it in ziplock bags, and then let a few cubes thaw for lunch while we're at the park. They haven't blacklisted me for using jarred food.
And, if your kaikamahine is happy and active and pooping and peeing, then probably try not to worry about her weight. Another friend's baby was constantly below 20th-%ile until he was about 10 months old. Now at 13 months, he's 75th=--%ile.
As moms, we're always so concerned about our babies eating and sleeping. My heart goes out to you. Just keep offering her food and trying to make it a pleasant experience. Ignore what everyone comments about her being tiny (My husband used to tell people our baby was a midget, and you should have seen the stunned faces of strangers!) Kama'aina pride their keiki to be huge (maybe that's why diabetes is so prevalent in HI--plate lunches aren't necessarily a good thing), so it's gotta be difficult there. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you. Pomaika'i!