My husband and I have noticed that our 7 year old who is in the 2nd grade has reverted back to bed wetting. We have noticed that for the past month it has occurred more then 5 times and the last 4 nights in a row. We have cut off liquids fairly early. We have even made attempts to wake our son up in the middle of the night, to go to the bathroom and become very discouraged when we find out he has already wet the bed. My husband becomes very angry with our son. As a mother I tend to let our son know its ok, and tell him it was an accident and, let him know we will deal with the consequences later. Is this normal or is there maybe an underlining problem that we need to address with his pediatrician.
You might want to think there could be a medical reason behind this. One thing could be a bladder infection, another, some children start to bed wet when they are having problems with obstructive sleep apnea due to enlarged tonsils. Also the long shot possibility is an early sign of diabetes. If it persists, I would definitely get a medical evaluation.
(I am an RN and a mom)
Try Hylands Homeopathic Bedwetting Tablets. They worked like a charm for my nephew. If he takes one each night, no problem but if he starts to skip, they know it!
Sometimes when kids regress like that, they had something happen to them that stresses them out. Maybe a bully at school, or they are having a hard time with a subject. Think about what's happened before he started wetting the bed and try to solve it and see if that helps. Having his Dad yell at him and get mad isn't going to help. Sometimes it's easier to not be mad when you know why.
D. -
You've received some very good responses already,but I want to underscore a few things:
1) He should NEVER be shamed for something over which he has no control. This is extremely embarrassing for him, and the Dad needs to STOP ridiculing him. I can promise you, this little boy is broken hearted when he wakes up and realizes he has wet himself while sleeping.
2) He should see a doctor as soon as possible, to rule out anything physical.
3) If there is nothing physical, then it is clear: SOMEthing in his life has changed. If you can't get to it, please take him to a counselor or therapist who can. His body is trying to tell you something.
Side note:
Up until my son started high school, he returned to bed wetting every year when school started. The change was traumatic for him on levels he wasn't even aware of. We never made a big deal of it, and now he's in his thirties, and guess what: he no longer has the problem. I'm just saying that this will not last forever, and the one for whom it is the biggest pain , and for whom it is most serious, is that little boy.
Good luck.
C.
This reminds me of a little boy my daughter was at school with. His problem occured because he was being bullied at school. I suggest that you find out if your son is in this situation whether from a fellow student or students, or even a member of staff. Also, your husband is not helping the situation by getting angry with him, this will in fact make the situation worse. Also, there may be a medical reason for this though I suggest you try to rule out other problems he may have first. This is not such an uncommon problem as you might think. Whatever the reason for this, and there is one, your son needs the compassion and care of both his parents, standing by him and fighting his end in your efforts to solve this. I wish him well as soon as may be.
I just saw this article in the newspaper today. Check out what Mr. Dad has to say at the following website. http://www.mrdad.com/ask/2008/10/07/overcoming-bedwetting/
I hope it helps.
First of all, your husband absolutely should not become angry with him...the child is asleep! He can't control it. There could be issues either physical or mental and I think both should be looked into with your pediatrician. My 14 year old occasionally wet the bed until she was about 9...it happens.
Find out what is going on with him... I mean really going on. This is usually a flag that something has changed or happened in his life that is making him insecure. Maybe a bully at school.. or at home??? When my husband and I were having problems, my son started this too. My husband, too, would get mad.. that made it worse. Love and positive reinforcement, and listen, really listen to him. We also cut off liquids after 8p, made sure he went to the bathroom before bed, and would take him again before we went to bed. That helped, but it did not get to the root of the problem. Best to you!
There is a condition called Vesicoureteral Reflux. A symptom? Bedwetting. What happens is the urine back tracks into the kidney. A Urologist would need to be seen for this.
Also, it is not uncommon for a child to have bedwetting problems. They will eventually outgrow it. The problem is how the parents handle it. The parents can really damage a child's emotions during that time. Does the child need checked out to make sure there is no physical problem? Yes. If there is not one then the child needs support from his parents during this crucial time. He can't control what happens when he is asleep. Therefore he shouldn't be punished.
You need to educate yourselves. A child of 7 who is wetting his bed, is very ashamed, and does not need more anger in his life, he needs understanding. I see that you have been married 3 years, so not the boys father. Go see a doc together who is a specialist. My 52 yr old brother doesn't wet the bed anymore, but did till he was 12. I have known several other children of friends who also did this. One little girl leaked urine all of the time. Now she is 30, with kids of her own. Good luck.
Hi,
I will have your son see the pediatrician about this issue. He may be having an infection or other medical issue.
On the other hand, kinds regress like this when they are extremely anxious. You may like to have a conversation with him about his feelings and concerns. In the mean time, a pull up may help with the mess.
Good luck,
S.
When my youngest daughter started wetting the bed at age 7, I couldn't imagine why and did all the usual things you are doing. This went on for 2 years and at age 9, she was diagnosed with nocturnal seizures...epilepsy. After she had a seizure in her sleep, all her muscles would relax including her bladder and urterine muscles causing her to wet the bed.
Before being very hard on your son, please have him checked out. Also,,,remember Michael Landon's story.. He will outgrow it and right now, can not help it. Not something to punish him about but to work to find the cause and help him overcome the embarrassment.
ah bless, as everyone has said there could be multiple things going on.
Stress - school has recently started. Is he getting up extra early? Is he adapting to his new routine.
A UTI - this is essential to rule out.
Even parasites, sometimes when kids get parasites their picking (nose, skin) increases and they don't control their bladder as well as they used to, especially during the night.
It could be a wealth of stuff, or nothing LOL It could just be he is sleeping heavier because he is so tired from school. Who knows. Try to hang in there, and get him off to his pediatrician, if nothing else they can rule out anything medical. And hopefully this too shall pass sooner rather than later :)
D., You mentioned he "reverted back". How many nights in a row was he able to stay dry before reverting back? Are you talking days, weeks, months, years? If he's been dry (continent) for a long time at night and now isn't, he may be dealing with some new stressor in his life, some change. Has someone important recently left his life? Any issues at school or home? If so, seek counselling for him and possibly your whole family. If there are no identifiable stressors, try a WetStop alarm. Just google it or bedwetting. It works like a charm!
Hi D.,
I have a 6 year old son that also wets the bed. I have taken him to a uriologist and he said that if one of the parents wet the bed as a child it is common for the child to do so. He also said not to make a big deal out of it that usually it will subside as they get older and if you do make a big deal out of it it could make it happen a lot longer. My son wears a pull up at night and we have also put a water proof bed cover on his bed he has started to wet the bed alot less. and whenever he doesn't we praise him. I hope this helps some.
has anything changed recently? is he having trouble at school. i would look for all the new things and changes , is he afraid after he goes to bed. definatly don't be angry of course he is not doing it on purpose, if looking at all these areas do not help then check with the doc.
Your son may be sensitive to artificial colors and preservatives. Check out www.feingold.org. Feingold is a 30yr old non-profit organization whose purpose is to inform the public about petroleum-based artificial ingredients in our food supply. These harmful additives cause ADD, ADHD, OCD and many other emotional and physical side effects including ENURESIS (Bedwetting). It is definately worth a try and you'll be healthier too. Good luck.
This is not uncommon. I have a 6 year old boy and 7 year old boy. They both occasionally have night accidents and when they have friends sleep over, the friends sometimes have accidents. Why do you think they make over night pants for big kids? Because big kids have accidents. There should be no consequences to deal with later and no one should be getting upset. I am sure you are not trying to raise an insecure child. If you want to teach him responsibility, then teach him how to put his wet sheets in the washing machine, but that is it. He can not be punished for something that he can not control. How would you like there to be consequences for you everytime you coughed or sneezed? It is the same thing!
I think you should take him to the doctor to rule out a UTI (urinary tract infection). It could also be stress related. Is everthing ok with him & school? Him & step-dad? Him & bio-dad? I noticed when my son had those nighttime accidents it was always on of the above and if it is school or parent related u need to dig carefully & LISTEN! Then u can fix the problem. Good luck!
His pediatrician is the place to start, because something medical may be contributing. But if that comes back negative, then go ahead and go to a child clinical psychologist and ask for the behavioral or "bell and pad" treatment for bedwetting. There may very well be an underlying issue, but the treatment is still behavioral. This is a commom problem that can easily be treated; there is no need to continue to have strife and anger at your home.
My almost 9yr old son has been wetting too, for 4 year now. After a full year dry at night. Searched I have for some resolution. I'm not one to wait till things resolve them selves. One thing I've discoved is it is in part due to a side effect from one medicine he takes. Of course Dr. doesn't believe it since it not in the brochure. But my water bill reflects the extra laundry. No grass watering or pool. When he doesn't take Singulair I see improvement by 30% of course when he does take it it seems even greater than the 30%. It wears on you two fold because you try so hard to resolve it. It broke my heart when he said , Mom my brother , two years old is more potty trained than I am. He wets during the day too. He deals with Asthma, peanut allergies, eczema and bedwetting. He said bed wetting is the worst. Because it affects his self worth. Besides the extra laundry, the fact that he leaves
wet pj's on floor and sheets on bed resisting the
responsibility of helping out, now that's what burns me up. That he can help. The wetting just makes me sad and frustrated. I'm just as despondent as he. A problem solver I just can't do any thing more. He's presently not taking Singulair but has had some asthma flares so may be back to taking it again, so there goes the wonderful 30% improvement. Sigh!
I am the mother of four children, the youngest is our 7 yo son. He still wets the bed repeatedly and we don't make a big deal out it. Positive encouragement has been the most effective along with staying in tune with what he is thinking about what is going on in his life. I've noticed that if he is feeling stress, like the month school began with new teacher and classmates, it is more likely to happen. We have adjusted out dinner time earlier and also stop drinks by 8pm. He can urinate before bath time and still needs to empty his bladder right before going to sleep. My husband who goes to bed later will usually take our son to urinate before he retires for the evening. Sometimes this helps and other times it does not. We generally feel our son sleeps so deep that he just doesn't wake up and we just have the mattress in a plastic cover and was bedding because we know eventually this too shall pass. Hope this helps! A. Burnette, Hillsborough, NC
Everyone has given such great responses and I wanted to stress the fact that you NEED to take him to the pediatrician and as soon as you can. I have a good friend whose daughter did the same thing and reverted back to bedwetting and she cut out liquids, etc. and it turned out she is diabetic! Don't waste time on this. Take your husband with you too, if he can.
As for ocassional bedwetting I have an 11 year old who still wets the bed at least twice once a month (as a matter of fact, last night)! Our doctor said it was just a matter of her bladdar not catching up to the rest of her body.
Good Luck and we'll be praying for you! R.
developing bed-wetter at an older age, when they weren't a bedwetter since potty training, can be a sign of a bladder infection or UTI. If this is a new thing you should probably call your ped. and see what they say.
If it were me, I would talk to the pediatrician. Talk to your son too and see if there's anything different going on at school or if something's bothering him. When you change the bedding after he's wet the bed, have him help change the sheets and remake the bed. continue to let him know he's not in trouble, it's ok and it's something that happens.
good luck
Hi D.,
I would see a Urologist. Sounds like maybe something physical maybe. Or could be psychological. Some things to consider: Has he been really stressed lately? Have things been stressed between your spouse and yourself? Kids pick up on stuff like that. If your stressed from work, a death in the family, etc. Kids internalize that stuff and sometimes cause them to do things they wouldn't normally do. Just trying to throw some ideas out there. I mean no disrespect at all.
I do hope that you can figure it out for all of your sake.
My daughter was having "drips" and we saw a urologist and discovered she had kidney reflux and ectopic ureter (tube from kidney to bladder not attached correctly)causing incontinence/drips.
W. from Indiana
there may be a problem weather it is phsycological or phyical you need to take him to the ped and see what is up could be one of any number of things best to be safe about it
Dear D.,
I tried to send this message once, but I am not sure that I succeeded, so I will try again. I am a mother of three children, two of them boys, and I am a grandmother of 7,4 of them boys,and great grandmother of 3 boys. Boys often have bed-wetting problems, some of them a lot bigger problem than do others. Our oldest grandson had a major problem for years, and his parents tried all types of programs and devices and spent a lot of money trying to help him. Basically, he had to outgrow the problem. The doctors said he slept so soundly that he just didn't wake up when he needed to go to the bathroom. Occasionally he would wake up, but he often didn't. Anyway, he did eventually manage to control the problem. They found that using disposable underwear for him at night sometimes helped. Another of my grandsons had a occasional problem with bed-wetting, and his parents made sure he had disposable underwear for the nights he spent at camp. That relieved his stress and possible embarrassment. I know that changing sheets so often etc. is difficult, but getting angry with him because he wets the bed, especially if he really can't control his bladder as my grandson couldn't, probably won't help and it may be detrimental to to his self-esteem and to your relationship with him. This problem will eventually solve itself, and it isn't worth damaging your loving relationship with your son.
I would speak to your doctor. My nephew had the same problem and I believe still has issues (he is 9 now). I am not sure of why but I know it was a medical issue.
With any sudden change in behavior, best to err on the side of caution and consult with a pediatrician.
My older daughter started to urinate in bed. It turned out she was reacting to a medication and having a seizures in her sleep.
But it could be any one of a myriad of other reasons.
-J.
Read the answers to this MamaSource query: http://www.mamasource.com/request/6247753284484857857
Maybe your husband gets so angry because he had the same problem as a child and that's how it was 'handled'. Hurt people hurt people (understand? People who have BEEN hurt will usually hurt others in the same manner, like a boy who grows up watching his mom be abuses SWEARS that he'll NEVER do that . . . but he almost always does. We do learn what we live). Try to have a gentle, private 'heart-to-heart' talk with hubby and get some understanding of his attitude instead of taking the son's 'side' and making Dad feel reprimanded for his attitude.
Check out webmd at http://www.webmd.com/sleep-disorders/guide/bedwetting-causes. Is there anything stressful going on at home? I would show this to your husband and let him know that him getting angry is not helping your child. It's not like he's doing it to make his dad angry or to be defiant. My sister went through this when our homelife was stressful, but the rest of us (3 other girls) didn't. There could be other causes too that are physical; check out the website.
DO NOT LET YOUR HUSBAND GET MAD ABOUT THIS! as if the child isnt ashamed enough to have dad yelling at him..ugh... as for the actual bed wetting itself talk to the doctor it could be a bladder infection (yes boys get them too) it could be diabetes also..... very important to talk to the doctor there is a nose spray that is supposed to help ask the doc about it. hope this helps! good luck!
I am reading about bedwetting right now. It sounds as if your son has secondary enuresis which could be due to an underlying problem. The book says it could be psycological or physical. The book suggests to take the child in to see his doctor to rule out things like diabetes and infection. I am reading this book because my 6 year old is a bed wetter, but has never been dry at night. The book is called 7 steps to nighttime dryness. I hope this helps.
My first thought is, something is bothering him. Maybe a bully? I would try talking to him to see if there is something going on. It could be alot of things, possibly a Urinary Tract, or Bladder infection.
If he stopped and now suddenly started again, it could be related to stress. If your husband continues to react with anger, that could very likely compound the situation. I hope he can try to understand that. You may want to investigate to see if there is something bothering him in school, the family, etc. He may not be able to help it and understanding and assistance is what he needs.
It is not uncommon that if your son also has dyslexia symptoms that the bedwedding may be related to the dyslexia. If he has difficulty with the small words, is very creative and has a good imagination, it may be worth looking at. The problem in this situation is that the imagination is so active that he really thinks he is in the restroom. The Davis Dyslexia Correction program actually has a bedwedding procedure that is used very effectively.
I had the same problem with my daughter it turned out to be allergies I took her off milk, chocolate, peanuts, peanut butter, and corn the bed wetting stopped immediately we gradually let her have milk but she still was afraid to eat or drink any of the foods that might have caused it but she never wet the bed again. Her Ped. said that when she was relaxed the allergy was triggered You might try this it worked for us.
You may want to insure that your son is having a positive experience in school.At times,children can revert back to bed wetting when they have been confronted with issues that make them uncomfortable.But,really this is normal,and many kids,especially boys wet the bed!Because this hasn't been the norm for him,it is only natural for you to worry.I would,however,insist that your husband refrain from anger over the situation.His attitude could in fact prolong the bed wetting.Your son is still a baby and shouldn't be ashamed of something so trivial.Best wishes!
Hi D.,
Is he doing it during the day? If he is. It might be a physical problem and you need to have him check.
Then maybe he is drinking stimulants like tea, coffee. pops with caffeen in them. I say see if these might be the problem. They could be encouraging his problem in bed. After 6 pm slow down the entake of liguid especialy the caffeen ones.
I hope I helped a little
Have agood day TODAY
Vicki W.
