6 Yr Old Still Having Accidents

My son is 6 and was having accidents alot we started a marble jar and every time he would not pee the bed he would get 15 marbles and when the jar was full he would get to go buy a toy. This started to work wonderful. and it was a good way for him to listen and do his chores all together. and I made all the other things with such a less amount of marbles. like cleaning his room 5 marbles, no talking back 3 marbles and so on. so when he gets to put 15 marbles in his jar that seems like sooo much to a 6 year old. I have been doing the jar for 6 months and he has maybe 1 accident in a month if that. good luck

Hello T.. I also have a son that is nine years old with the same issues. The condition for the urinating is called enuresis and for the soiling is encupeuresis. He has been doing this since he was in kinder. I'm sorry to tell you, but nothing has worked for my son either. Unlike yourself my son did have issues growing up. We ended up fleeing domestic violence, and he is on medication for PTSD, and Major Depression. The doctors say he will eventually grow out of it, but it is something really hard to deal with. Counseling hasn't helped him either. I'm looking forward to reading some of your responses and hopefully we can find a solution for the issues our children are having. Hang in there cause you are not alone!

Hi~My family dealt with a similar issue when my daughter was 71/2. We thought she was just being lazy at first and did the punishment thing too. However, it occured to me that I had some bladder issues when I was younger, so took her to a Urologist. Evidentally, there are sometimes when children's brains and bladders lose the ability to communicate effectively, hence they start having accidents. Luckily no surgery or anything like that. He put her on a regimen of older anti-depressants (no side effects) that help to retrain the brain and bladder to communicate and also a schedule of drinking larger amounts of water at certain times during the day and learning to hold it and train her bladder to hold more. I was concerned with this at first, due to bladder infections, etc, however, that mostly affects grown women when holding their urine. You might want to check this plan out with a Urologist. After 2 months, she had only 2 accidents and is now completely accident free....it worked wonders.

T.: I don't have any huge words of wisdom, but some understanding. My daughter has started doing the same thing. She's four years old and started having accidents while we were on vacation at DisneyWorld mid-December. They are now daily (even at school) and she's going through about four outfits a day and two sets of jammies at night. Some insight her teachers have given me is that most of the time it's just a phase and that they really are just so focused on what they are doing that they don't want to stop. One of the things we've done is Kegels. Funny as that sounds, it has helped go from full on accidents to large dribbles that still need changed. We've made it a stop and go game while she's on the toilet to get her to practice stopping her pee while she's going to gain a little more control. Then we remind her to try to feel that when she doesn't want to stop playing and can get her to the bathroom with a little mess. Our other problem is she is struggling with being a big kid and doesn't want to wipe herself. That may be some of what is going on with your daughter, she just wants to play that "baby" roll a little bit. It might not hurt to indulge her a little and then she may get over it. Good luck!

Are you completely sure nothing has happen to her? She may not tell you if its something she is scared to talk about.

It could also be as simple as her blatter is not growing fast enough to keep up with her body. By some pull ups. It might be harder then you think for her to control. I know from personal experience. Been there done that. I have a severe sensory issue. I cannot feel that I have to pee till it is all but to late. Talk to Occupational Therapist. Might be the help you need. Good Luck

I agree that you need to go see a pediatric urologist. Children's hospital in Denver has a great staff. In the meantime, stay consistent with the watch and make sure she is going and trying every time the watch vibrates. Make it go off more often if you need to. Teach her how to do Kegels. We went through this with our daughter - she even had exploratory surgery to see if her system was developed correctly. For her, the watch helped only when we were very strict about her trying every time. It is a lot of work on your part. Hang in there. It won't last forever, I promise.

The other thing that I hate to mention, but it does happen... is there any remote possibility that your daughter has been sexually abused? Is there any chance that she has been exposed to sexual material (saw a movie she shouldn't have seen etc)? These things can cause wetting issues.

T.

T.

When the doctor says "nothing's wrong" on such a serious issue, he clearly hasn't been trained in this area. Go to a specialist. Call Children's Hospital. They have a program for children with this problem. Do not assume that this problem will naturally go away.

I am under the impression that pee/poo problems are like eye problems -- if you wait too long to get treatment, they can't be fixed. I have a relative in this situation, age 10, wearing pull-ups and pads at all times. Parents waited too long because they were dealing with other issues with her and didn't want to overwhelm her with different types of doctors and counseling. Bad decision.

Has the dr talked to her? Has she seen a urologist? Has anyone explained that if she holds it, it makes it harder and harder to not have accidents?

Hang in there,
R.

http://pediatrics.aappublications.org/cgi/content/extract...
please check out this link to an article from a pediatric journal that I found very helpful when understanding my child' trials.
IN denver area, children's hospitals BEE Clinic has been helping us.
Our first appt included (noninvasive tests!!)an abdominal x-ray, urine flow and volume analysis and a bladder ultrasound. All confirmed what we guessed, but gave us a starting point and a baseline to work with.
The money was well spent!!
Good luck, A.

She sounds a lot like my daughter. Because she can't take care of it herself you need to take care of it for her. Set an alarm for 1 hour and when it goes off she has to stop whatever she is doing and go immediately, no exceptions! Do not put her in charge of the alarm; you will have be completely in charge of it. It will be a big pain for you, but hopefully it will be enough of a pain for her she will decide it's easier just to deal with it herself. Right now she has gotten so used to having accidents and being wet it doesn't bother her at all anymore. That is a really hard mentality to overcome.

If it is a problem at school talk to her teacher. Usually teachers will help you out if there is a problem. She shouldn't need to go every hour at school, but she does need to go every recess and at lunch.

Good luck!

I know its creepy to even bring this up, but I know children who have been molested can have this problem. I don't want to scare you, but you might try talking with her about it, or try to think who may have had access to her at about the time this started.

This sounds psychological to me, esp. if she was completely potty traind for a year previously. It looks like her little sister was born when she was 3, is it possible that that could have contributed to the regression? If she saw the baby getting attention everytime it needed a change she might have thought "if I need a change too, I will get that attention". If so, at this point it's probably just a bad habit.

I would approach it from a completely accepting position, and just ask her why she is not relieving herself in the restroom- be honest, tell her that you're concerned for her health and well-being. If she says that she wants to and can't control it; see a specialist to find possible physical causes. But if she's "too busy" dig deeper; maybe she is embarassed to admit a physical condition or maybe she is trying to cope with some trauma- keep in mind that trauma is subjective so it may be a very small thing that has been bothering her for a long time. No matter what don't persecute her- it's the behavior that she needs to change, and she needs your love and support to do that.

Guided meditation may help you help her understand the root of this issue and resolve it- I agree with Crista that this should be resolved soon before it becomes too deeply imbeded into her sub-conscious.

I wish you the best.

Ok, this is really kind of funny reading this, not the peeing! I'm in the exact same boat. I have to helpful advice for you, but for me it's nice to know for me that I'm not the only one with a 6 year old in a pull ups! Our doctor said the same thing... nothings wrong, try fiber. So we are now just being patient and trying to remind her as often as we can. We even have the watch, it's too big and hurts her. Anyhow good luck! By the way I also have four daughters 9, 7, 6, 2 and have been married ten years!

My first thought when I was reading this is that there might be some emotional trauma you don't know about, possibly that she doesn't recognize. Did the doctor rule out psychological issues or just physical (and how much did he do to even rule out physical?) I don't think it would hurt to ask for a referral to urologist and a counselor who specializes in working with young children.